On the drive back Gauri felt relieved that she didn't have anything to hide from him anymore. She knew he had taken the news hard. Strangely she had been the one to offer comfort to him. Gauri had argued often with her psychiatrist that she isn't getting well , she had assumed that she wasn't over it because of the continued panic attacks and nightmares. Even though her psychiatrist assured her that she had improved over time, she failed to believe it until now.       

It maybe because of Arnav but she felt relived talking about it after a long time. Arun knew the story of course but she never shared the details with him, it always been like a unspoken event. Today she no longer felt like someone who couldn't handle what happened to her four years ago, but someone who had learnt to find it in her to speak about it and remain unaffected by it. Yet when Arnav parked the car in her house ,she knew there was someone who had been too affected today.      

" Stay with me tonight Arnav.. Please " Gauri spoke up as she looked at him, she didn't want to let him out of her sight when she knew he would be somehow blaming himself for everything. She had seen her mother blame herself because she had taken her father car to shop for necessities instead of her car because it got a flat tire and thus making her father leave five minutes later after he got the call from her. Her father blamed himself for not being able to protect her , for not tracking her down faster .       

Gauri knew her father did his best after finding her missing from the club, but even now he blamed himself for not finding her sooner.  With her phone tossed out in the club and no CCTV cameras in the club, he went far and above to find her , he canvased the traffic cameras to find the vehicles that left the club, he interviewed almost everyone in the club to see if they saw her and it was because of his determination someone mentioned seeing her leaving with a guy, with only the information of the car model and the color of the car. He had found her within 5 hours. 

   
An impossible feat because if he was late by just a second, she wouldn't have been alive. Yet he blamed himself over and over again for not protecting her . And deep down she knew it was because they loved her that they kept wondering on what if and since she knew Arnav ,he must be doing the same even when he was miles away from the town that day. And she didn't want him alone tonight .

     
Her parents both were seated in the hall waiting for her , they looked worried and concerned as always, the last four years she had seen them with concern all the time. The were never able to fully relax around her because they still kept waiting for her to fall apart, not that she could blame them ,she knew it was because they cared but she wanted them to be able to move on as well . Gauri turned around to see Arnav who looked still stricken up that she had been the one who had to inform her parents that he was staying the night .

Gauri went in to check on Rahul , and left Arnav alone with her parents but when she came outside ,she overheard her father voice and it still managed to make her hurt . Her father may not have been related to her by blood but he loved her and in a way she owe it to Arnav because he had been the one who helped her accept her parents marriage .

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" I am sorry Son" Gauri's father word kept ringing in his ears as he walked inside her room. Her father words were the first sign of acknowledgement of his pain, Arnav knew he loved Gauri and it must have been way too painful for him to be unable to protect his daughter. He looked up to find Gauri standing few meters behind them 

   
 Arnav  didn't know if she overheard those words but her eyes were filled with tears when she walked up to them. She quickly blinked them away but he saw them and it made the night too real . She bid her parents goodnight before walking him to her room. He didn't know her reason for asking him to stay but he would never been able to deny her request anytime except the one time ,he foolishly acted as if he knew the best.

     
He had been the one who was three year older than her ,and it meant protecting her and making decision for her just like how he did for his sister. He never seen Gauri has someone equal to him , Just like how he protected his sister and Cousin, he had protected Gauri as well. He knew Gauri was wise beyond her age and she never makes a decision lightly yet he thought he knew better when he broke up with her . Because he wanted her to live her life and not get caught up in waiting for him to come back from the army. 

     
He had been a selfish jerk. And not once he believed the Gauri knew better than him. His plans for the army seemed bigger than life six years ago, it had been his dream from the first time he heard his grandfather tell him bedtime stories about his time in the war. And no one in his family or anyone he met throughout the years told him anything different, he was praised for his decision because he choose to protect his country . And he got caught up in it that he never even imagine doing anything else.  

   
He had a plan and he didn't want to deviate from it , he thought doing so was right because he even let go of Gauri for doing so. It hurt walking away from her but he believed it was for the greater good, he considered himself doing something good at the expanse of his heart. Since he was too caught up in his pain, he never once let himself think if there was any other way . He should have believed Gauri words when she told him that she would wait for him.  

 
But two years in the army made him grow up fast. he had learnt that his younger self only fell in love with the idea of protecting his country without understanding the depths of being in army . He would never regret the years he spent in the army , he found satisfaction working with his fellow colleagues who risked their life daily for the country. Yet he had seen others who had a family back home, and the time and distance played a huge part , nobody denied it yet they were able to found happiness in the short time they could be with their loved ones. He longed for it in those two years to just hear her voice or read her letters and knew he made a mistake because he knew it would have been enough for both of them as well.

 
When his sister told him that Gauri moved on, he decided to make it right by apologizing to her. He had again assumed life would wait for him , he should have called her or wrote her a letter instead of waiting to do it face to face because if he had did any of the above then Gauri wouldn't have been on the other end of his sister hatred. Logically he knew not all events could be controlled by sheer will but he cant find it in himself to forgive his younger self for being naive.

" You are blaming yourself aren't you?" the words from Gauri made him look at her , he didn't know how she could read his mind but he was indeed blaming himself.

" Arnav, first sit down and stop walking around the room in circles." her voice continued speaking as she looked at him with understanding.  He looked at her hands which were pointing him to sit beside her and he walked towards her until he was standing next to her. He didn't sit beside her because he wasn't composed yet .  

 " It is not your fault" She spoke up looking directly at him that he cant help but see the sincerity in her face. He knew her words made sense yet he was too hurt that he couldn't really believe it . But right now he didn't want her to feel like she needs to comfort him ,she already did it back in the car and he cant keep taking away from her instead of being stronger for her . 

" I am fine" he answered back trying to keep his voice from wavering . She nodded her head in acceptance but still waited for him to sit beside her ,so he did. She didn't speak up for awhile after that and simply leaned on to his shoulders and closed her eyes as if the day events had drained her out. 

 Around thirty minutes later, he found her asleep on his shoulders. He didn't want to wake her up, so he gently laid her down and covered her with the blankets and got up to leave until he couldn't make his feet move away from her, he needed to be around her .So he sat at the opposite side of the bed and watched her sleep, he couldn't sleep because he expected her to have an nightmare given the fact she relived the events tonight when she spoke to him about it . And so he remained awake to be able to wake her up when it happens until sleep won him over that he fell asleep right beside her 

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 Lavanya Sanskar Maheshwari had lost her best friend once and she wasn't going to let her shut herself again, She never assumed her plan to bridge the gap between her cousin and best friend would back fire in an single day, Kavya had always been dramatic and over the years Gauri and Lavanya learned to accept her eccentrics as her character . Yet when Gauri and Arnav bhai broke up, Kavya changed so much that it had been hard for Lavanya to keep peace.

         
So she tried to make peace between those two, since Kavya would leaving in a week back to abroad . She wanted to do the right thing until it made her lose her best friend. Gauri had always been understanding of Kavya, so Lavanya had assumed her best friend would forgive her for ditching her in the club . Except it didn't work out the way she assumed, Gauri ignored her calls for the next two days that she visited her house two days later only to hear from Gauri mother that she didn't want to see her .

       
Gauri and Lavanya were the friends who never fought with each other, in all the years since they met at the age of six. They never had a single fight between them . So Lavanya had been heartbroken at Gauri silence and refusal to meet her. She kept trying to visit her for the next two weeks and when Gauri refused to meet her for over fifteen days, Lavanya sent her mom to talk for her instead. It wasn't a move she was proud of but she had gotten desperate to make up with her best friend and her mom came back home and told her that Gauri had moved to Chennai to live with her grandparents. And that had been four years ago.

       
Over the years Lavanya believed that there must have been some other reason behind her friend disappearance, at first she did believe Gauri had been angry with her. But it didn't make any sense, then when she heard about Gauri marriage, she had assumed it was the reason for her distance. Lavanya had told Gauri parents plenty of time that she was happy for Gauri and would like to meet her and her husband. She had hoped it would show her support and make Gauri understand that she wasn't going to begrudge her friends decision to marry someone else than her cousin.      

 Now she knew better, the first time she saw her best friend .She had million questions on her mind yet all she knew was that she was back and had married her cousin, but seeing her made Lavanya realize whatever she imagined were not even close to the reason behind her friend disappearance. Because Gauri didn't look like the girl she used to know, obviously Lavanya knew she would have grown up in those years but it was the sadness that lurked behind her eyes that told her ,there was more to her story than she believed. 

     
 Still Lavanya couldn't let her shut her down yet again, so she visited Gauri house just after sunrise. Lavanya had always been a early rise that she drove her scooty ,a gift from her mother to Gauri's house. Ishann opened the door and she found herself walking towards her room. She knocked the door gently but she knew Gauri would be awake by now ,since they both shared the trait of rising up early in the morning, she didn't expect the door to be opened up right away. At first she was thrilled by it then found herself shocked as she glanced at her best friend frantic gestures trying to silence her ,she didn't understand her reasons until she glanced behind her and found someone else sleeping in the bed.

   
At first glance she assumed it to be Rahul, her son. But the figure didn't look like a child and she had her answer when few seconds later, when Gauri mouthed those words in whisper " Don't wake him up".  Lavanya had heard from her dad that Gauri marriage had been technically for the sake of Rahul ,and they weren't really together but she knew that it had been her cousin in Gauri room and she smiled at the realization maybe they are back together for good.  

 " It not what you think it is " Gauri spoke up yet again when they were few meters away from the room. And Lavanya felt her deflate a little at those words. She had hoped for it but was smart enough to let the matter drop when she finally have Gauri speaking with her again. 

  " You promised not to shut me out" Lavanya spoke up as she looked at her friend . She didn't want to bring it up but she just got her friend back and didn't want to lose her again.

  " I Promised not to disappear Lavanya, i am still around and i just needed some time alone " Gauri spoke up making Lavanya feel relieved until Gauri attention was diverted back to her son who came out of his room to greet her . Lavnaya had learnt the sign language to communicate with one of her patient who had been deaf so she understood Rahul words which was just questions on why her cousin was sleeping in her mother bed. 

  " I would have shared my room " Rahul answered back when Gauri signed to him that it was because Arnav didn't have a room to sleep in the house. Lavanya smiled at the innocent conversation between those two until that smile fell away at Rahul innocent question next. 

" But Dad told me that you don't like to share your bed. It why he always let me sleep with him in his room" Rahul words were innocent enough but Gauri froze up as her gaze locked into her.  She saw the panic in her friend eyes as Lavanya realized the implication behind Rahul words. 

The dad in this conversation wasn't her cousin, which must mean Gauri first husband and it didn't make sense that Gauri and her husband didn't share a room.  

P.S: " That it for now. Let me know your thoughts and Feedbacks.. Hit the votes if you liked it "

Love

Juanita Reid.