*Intro*

The day starts as usual in IMP with Blitza getting calls from clients. Due to it being St. Patricks Day, she was planning on having IMP take a day off, and go to a bar, but these were last minutes clients that Blitza decided to schedule before she realized what day it was on.

So now (Y/N), Blitza, Moxxie, and Millie are going over what they know about the job.

(Y/N): So how many targets are we going after?

Blitza: Four.

Millie: Is there anything we need to know about them before we start slaying?

Blitza: They're not real threats combat-wise, but they did murder our clients over a couple of coins, so watch your backs, and don't let your guard down. I don't need a repeat of what happened with Martha.

Moxxie: You're still on that?

Blitza: What? No, I'm just making a point. But thanks for the reminder.

Moxxie: Dammit.

Blitza: Now this may seem like the usual shit we do. Do you know? Go in, get out, that sort of deal.

(Y/N): And according to what the clients said, it should be easy. But there is a catch. It's where they're located that is the tricky part.

Millie: Where are they located?

Blitza: Some sleazy casino in a town with an Irish culture or something.

(Y/N): The place will be packed full of people. Our best option is to either catch them in their rooms or somewhere secluded. Also, we're gonna need disguises so we can blend in.

Blitza: This will be like a heist. Only instead of stealing something, were killing targets.

Moxxie: So still an assassination.

Blitza: No one asked you, Mox.

The scene now cuts to an Irish-themed casino where we can see (Y/N) and the imps dressed up in disguises with some fancy clothing. Mainly formal clothing, so it's nothing too flashy. Blitza was wearing a woman's suit, the same as Moxxie, and Millie was wearing a black dress with a slit that reveals her left leg with arm-length gloves. Even (Y/N) was wearing a black suit that made him look like a secret agent, especially with his hair slicked back professionally.

Blitza: Ok, here's the plan. We each find our targets, and we split up. Got it?

(Y/N), Moxxie, & Millie: Got it.

(Y/N): And as an added incentive if we do a good job, I'm buying everyone drinks when we get back.

The imps cheered at that.

However, as they entered the casino, they don't notice that a deadly yet diminutive figure had arrived.

???: So this be where the last of me shillings be? How may deal with the thieves? We shall see.

The group makes their way onto the casino floor and begins and insoutshoutt their assigned targets.

They soon spot their targets:

Blitza's target: A balding pig of a man flaunting his wealth as he wins another casino game while surrounded by bitches.

(Y/N)'s target: A short-haired woman in a white dress and some overly exaggerated assets while being eyed by every straight man, and gay woman in the bar.

Millie's target: A handsome southern-looking fellow with a white cowboy hat with a white suit with tassels. He also had a beard and mustache combo.

Moxxie's target: A fancy-looking magician who draws a crowd with just card tricks alone. He doesn't have a cape, but rather a split tail coat.

Blitza: Got him in my sights.

(Y/N): Got me an hourglass saying that it's time.

Millie: I see a country boy.

Moxxie: I see a cheap douchebag hooding knockoff.

Blitza: Ok, targets in sight. Let's do this.

(Y/N): Alright. Three, two, one, break!

With that said, the four split off to deal with each target.

With Blitza, the balding fat man was once again acing the casino he was winning. He was good too good in fact.

Blitza had shown up to his group a couple of minutes ago and watched him win. If this guy wanted women to be impressed by him, then shell play hard to get to catch his interest.

Blitza: Eh. I'm not impressed.

The man took notice of Blitzas bored expression as she walked away like a serious businesswoman who got a no-nonsense attitude.

The man excused the rest of the ladies to go after her.

Gambler: Excuse me, ma'am?

Blitza: What?

Gambler: Pardon me, but I couldn't help but notice that you seemed a little how do I put this? unimpressed with your visit here at the casino.

Blitza: Well can you blame me? It's the same as every other casino I've been to.

Gambler: Well, there must be something I can do to make your visit more pleasing.

Blitza smirked as if thinking of an idea.

Blitza: There is one way~.

With (Y/N)'s target, she's a thin woman with rather exaggerated assets. One might even say that she would need two seats for her ass. That's literally what she's doing. She's sitting in two seats at once at the bar!

(Y/N) walked up to the bar, and ordered a glass of water with ice.

The big-butt and big-breasted woman took notice of the new handsome stranger that sat next to the seat where her right ass cheek was currently filled.

She kept glancing at him to see if he would sneak a peek at her, but after a couple of minutes, he didn't do anything besides sit there and drink his water.

(Y/N): Do you have something to say, or are you just curious?

Thicc woman: Oh, sorry. It's just that you seem new around here. An out-of-towner?

(Y/N): You can say that.

Thicc woman: I'm honestly surprised you're not-

(Y/N): -down with the thickness? Well, momma taught me it's rude to stare at strangers.

Thicc woman: Oh, a mama's boy huh?

The woman then leaned forward towards (Y/N) to display more of her massive cleavage.

Thicc woman: I'll be your mommy if you want~?

(Y/N): That depends are you up for it?

Thicc woman: Just follow me, handsome~.

She then got up and beckoned (Y/N) to follow her to her room.

Millie's target, he's a more western cowboy-looking guy with some southern swagger.

As he's seen walking along the casino floor, he suddenly bumps into someone.

Millie: Oof!

He had bumped into Millie, and she had dropped her purse and spilled some of the contents like some loose change, some lipstick, and a condom.

Cowboy: Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't watch where I was going.

Millie: It's quite alright. I just need to pick up the contents of my purse.

She purposely bent over to show off her thicc ass through her dress as she picked up her stuff. The cowboy couldn't help but stare at it as she swayed it from side to side.

Once she had collected everything back in her purse, she was about to leave when the cowboy stopped her.

Cowboy: Wait, can I ask you something?

Millie: Shoot.

Cowboy: I don't mean to pry, but what's a cute southern belle such as yourself doing in a place like this? As corny as that sounds.

Millie smirked before speaking.

Millie: I could ask a man like you the same thing.

The cowboy smirked before he asked her a question.

Cowboy: Say, you're not busy with anything are you?

Millie: No. Are you?

Cowboy: Not at the moment. What do you say we go and make ourselves more acquainted if you catch my drift?

Millie: I'd says buckle up cowboy.

With that said the cowboy fellow took her to his room.

With Moxxies target, he miraculously made cards fly out of one hand and to the other hand with ease without dropping one.

He then notices Moxxie watching in absolute awe as if seeing this for the first time.

Magician: You there!

Moxxie: M-Me?

Magician: Yes of course! How about an old classic?

He then shuffled a bunch of cards before showing them face down to her.

Magician: Pick a card, any card.

Moxxie picked a card and then gave it back to the magician.

He shuffled the cards again before revealing a card.

Magician: And here's your- wait a minute.

He notices that it wasn't just the playing card she chose, but also a blank white card that has something written on it.

It says: Will you make my virginity disappear~?

He looks back at Moxxie who's smirking and bouncing her eyebrows at him.

Taking the hint, the magician gives a sly smirk before replying.

Magician: Well, if you'd like it would be an honor~.

He then takes her to his room.

You see the pattern here, right?

Now, what is our not-so-mysterious little arrival doing?

We cut back to the rather short but deadly man going to a room where a certain gambler is supposed to be.

He suddenly appears in the room in a puff of smoke, ready to surprise his foe.

???: Well well well! What do we have- what is the?

His introduction is cut short when he sees that the man is already dead.

The gambler has a plunger up his ass, and his head is smashed through a TV with wires strangling, and electrocuting him.

???: Well this is a shock. I sense no coin on him while he's dead as a rock.

He disappears from the room and searches for the next room where his stolen property could be.

He finds another room, and he teleports inside.

???: Guess who's down with the huh?!

He sees that the hourglass-bodied woman is frozen in ice.

???: Well this is a bit of a cold greeting, and sadly no shilling.

He teleports out of there and searches for the next room.

He teleports into the room with the cowboy.

???: Howdy there- oh come on!

Yep, he's dead too. He's hogtied while in his underwear and has been strangled to death with a rope around his neck.

??? Whoever's taking me killings have taken my shillings.

He teleports to the final room and is not even shocked at what he sees, but he is frustrated.

???: Seriously?!

The magician is in a magic box that you cut in half, and the magician is indeed literally cut in half with his insides hanging out.

???: Who keeps doing this?!

He then hears a whistle and teleports into the hallway to see (Y/N) holding four gold coins in his hand as he smirks at him.

(Y/N): Sup, Leprechaun? You're looking a little green with envy

Yep. The tiny not so mystery figure is a killer leprechaun.

Leprechaun: What?! So it was you who took my shillings from them?!

(Y/N): Not just me, but yeah.

Leprechaun: How could you have possibly known about me or my gold?! I hate to admit it, but this is pretty bold.

(Y/N): Let's just say some dead people hired us to take out the four assholes you just found dead. However, they were pretty precise about one specific asshole that they all knew about, and that asshole is you. Congratulations! Aren't you just lucky?

Leprechaun: Luck is what you're gonna need when I'm through with you!

(Y/N): Luck? Buddy, if you knew me well enough you'd realize that I don't have luck. It's all in the charm.

(Y/N) then snapped his fingers, and Millie dropped from the ceiling with a wrought iron axe, which chopped him in half with burning smoke.

Then Moxxie and Blitza dropped from the ceiling and began stabbing both halves of the corpse with wrought iron knives.

The corpse shriveled and burned until nothing was left but ash.

(Y/N): Nice job, ladies. Now I do believe I owe you all a drink.

Imps: WOOHOO!!!

Back in hell, the entire I.M.P. staff was in a bar while wearing St. Patrick's day themed clothing as they were enjoying drinks, including Loona. Even Amy was there.

Moxxie: This is funny. I'm so drinky! Heeheeheeheehee!

Millie: Daw, I love ya Mox-Mox! *Smoooooooch!*

Blitza: Woohoo! St. Patty's day babyyyyyyy! *burp!*

(Y/N): This is too good to miss.

(Y/N) then notices Loona and Amy giving him somewhat drunk but lust-filled stares.

(Y/N): Uh, why are you two staring at me like that?

Loona & Amy: St. Patty's make-out session!

The two suddenly pounced on (Y/N) as he screamed like Squidward.

(Y/N):

*Outro*

(Happy late St. Patrick's Day, my sexy readers! Credit to @ReptileEdge for helping me with this holiday special and many more to come!)

Here's a dancing Leprechaun: