July - 2019
Wednesday - 4:24 p.m

Dear Diary,

Hey. It's me.
I won't be able to write my diary consistently ever. Isn't it? And, almost every entry makes me feel very depressive. It sounds like I am some kind of main character in a movie or some sort of novel in which every painful thing keeps on happening with me.

It feels like just yesterday, when I was in the rehabilitation centre, being forced to improve and get that urge out of my system. I stayed in that cell for next 13 months.

Yeah, the therapist lied. It took a lot of efforts from myself to quit it.

According to the reports, I am all good to be able to live a normal life unless I choose to take drugs again. The addiction is just avoided. If I do it anymore, it'll be difficult to redeem myself again. Not like I will.

I am 21 this year. Life's been pretty good after I've recovered from the addiction.
Due to the rehabilitation, I had to drop the idea of graduating or any college unless I got out of there.

Though an year late, I am in my 2nd year of graduation right now.
I chose literature and drama major.
Ask me why? Because I wanted to piss my parents off. As simple as that.
They wanted me to opt for business management. Big family - reputed family or some stupid shit like that.

After I put up my front, for the first time ever, they relented and sent me here, to New York for that. I have got my own 2 bedroom apartment to live in.

The college is quite a reputed one among the city. Nothing less could be expected from my parents. It has also got an enormous library. That's my safe haven here.

After college hours, I still get a lot of spare time to spend as I wish.
I took up a part time job here, in a bookstore. It's just two-blocks down the street. Not that I am in need of money.
Just short on human civilisation.

My shift starts from three in the afternoon every monday, thursday & saturday. I've no friends to hang out with. I don't need any. Judging from my past experience, I don't seem to have any luck when finding a company for myself.

I always wondered how will it be, to be able get out of that house where I used to live with my parents, for once.
It's amazing. I have started enjoying my own company. Living alone. No other person to interact with. I have taken a liking to this silence around me.

It was all simple and peaceful until day before yesterday. Yes, there is always a sunset if there's a sunrise.
They called me back.
After all these past months away from that place, they called me. It came as a surprise to me. Yeah, seeing your phone ringing, especially seeing the word 'Mother' popping on it. That was a surprise.

I had my suspicions on the call. Though, I picked it up. They made it short and authorative. My parents want me back in town. And yes, there is a motive behind that. Motive being, they want me to meet a guy they chose for me, to marry and settle down as soon as I am done with the graduation.

I did not have a say in it. I do not have any rights to deny the proposal. But I have learned to fight for myself over all these years. I refused it directly but they sent people to get me. No matter how much I was against this, I was brought back by force.

After many futile attempts at resisting the arrangement, I had to meet the guy.

It was today. I met him. He's 25. Taller than me. Fair and good looking. Sole heir of his father's business, in short, a rich second generation kid.

When we were sent to converse alone, he used those old flattering tricks. Praising, flirting and sweet talking.

Judging by the 10 minutes I conversed with him, he did not seem that bad.
Naturally, I know I would not have any chance to refuse this marriage. My parents were being benefitted, hence they're ready to exchange their daughter for fame and success.

Since I know I don't have any other choice, I gave in. I talked to him. When we were called back, I sighed and agreed to the proposal. My parents beamed and my mother hugged me. She actually.... hugged me today. In joy. Even though the reason was selfish, I liked it. It overwhelmed me with emotions.

Since I agreed to the alliance, obviously I had made my calculations about this. If I had to get married to him, I have to make it peaceful for both the parties. If 'love' does not exist, it is at least better to have friendship between the partners.

As I was thinking about these things while heading over to room, I overheard some of the maids discussing about him in the kitchen. One of the maids said that she had heard from her daughter that he was a playboy. He often visited clubs and took new girls home every night. The others just shared some sympathetic words regarding me.

I was stunned. I knew that nothing in my life could happen so smoothly. I had my doubts when he was so swift with his words and flirting. Off course he was well practiced in them. Otherwise, why will his parents want him to marry and even personally find a girl for him.
As I wasn't in the town since last 2 years, I did not know about these rumours.

I was so easily fooled by my parents.
No way they did not know about this thing. The pathetic me, was so easily moved by the hug. How could I possibly agree to the marriage after knowing about this?

I went to discuss it with my parents and refused to the marriage, but it did not work out. Now, I have no choice left.

I have planned to run away after the clock strikes 12 at the midnight. I don't have any destination in my mind, though, my goal is to get out of the town before the sunrise. They'll eventually know about my absence and search the New York, so I can't go there.

I have already prepared my luggage and the money I will need. Even though I have seen many movies, I can't help but be nervous. I haven't dared to do anything such before.

I hope it ends well.

Yours Only,
Elora.