I didn't want that Silm-mood. I wanted to be in christmas-mood. Now I am listening to Giselle (the dance), doing this:

It never was supposed to be more than a skech. And I don't really know, what it is either. A meeting between Maedhros & Celbrimbor in Valinor?

Don't know. But I am sure, that Celebrimbor had a little crush on, if not even was in love with Annatar. I mean, he came a bit after Galadriel had rejected Telpe, who by this thought tohave the proof, that he was just as bad as his father. He thought himself unlovable and therefore burried himself in his work, what nearly drove him mad. He had nothing. No wife. No family. No future. With his work, that brought nothing but madness, being the only thing he really was good at. And then Annatar came, handsome, kind, clever. He would listen to Celebrimbor. He would comfort him, when he was on the edge of madness. He would show him, how beautiful his work could be, and Celebrimbor would feel alife again, realizing that familiar beating of his heart, as he had thought he would never feel it again. He felt alife for the first time since what felt like eternity. And then Annatar was revealed as who he really was. He had betrayed Celebrimbor all the time, playing with his feelings, giving him hopes and secretly stealing his work. Imagine, how it must have felt to be tortured to death by someone who still looked like the person you had hoped you had a future with. Who, among all the craftsmen in middle earth, had chosen you to work by your side. Whom you still loved in a painful, confusing way...

That's weird. You should never allow me to write texts so late in the evening....

But for Maedhros it is quite simmilar. Well, no. Actually it's alltogether different. But still simmilar.
I am convinced, that Sauron tortured him with fair visions, or rather with the awaking from fair visions. But I too think, that he showed Maedhros kindness, or even affection, listening to him, when he was recalling his life in Valinor. Being there, when he desperately needed someone. This was, because he knew, Maedhros needed another living being, but would never allow anyone who served Morgoth to be there for him. Only that he had to, because Sauron's presence was so comforting, the touch of his hand so warm and familiar, so welcome in the Noldo's lonelyness... Still, he knew, it was wrong to give in to the comfort the servant of Morgoth could give. But everything was so dark arround him. He was so allone. And Sauron was so kind. It tore him apart every second he breathed. Longing and refusing. He hated him. He wanted him to be there. It didn't matter. He would die anyway. In the end.

Now I am writing texts again. Sorry!

(RINGS OF POWER SPOILERS!!!)

And do you know, what is annoying? It is annoying, that whenever I google for "Celebrimbor" the first thing I get is a picture of an old, displeased looking man with a weird haircut and whenever I google "Sauron" I finde a handsome, but not extraordinarily fair young man who does not at all look like the beautiful but dangerous, powerful, seductive, cruel, redhaired demon I want to draw. It's awful!

You'll read from me.
Alice 🙃