CYCLE PII- CYCLE SIX

Theo was hovering over Cooker's shoulder, with her finger pointed at one of the papers in front of her, "I don't sign my name like that."

"You do now," Cooker chuckled and gave the paper to Iona, who blew the ink dry then folded the paper into an envelope.

Cooker dipped the quill in the ink again and signed Theo's name even sloppier than the letter before. Theo gasped and reached over, plucking the ink from her hands.

"Theo! Now the whole letter is smudged!" Cooker shrieked out and pushed her shoulder back, trying to get Theo off her, "Xy! Did you see what she did?"

"Do it right, Cooker!" Theo yelled back.

Xyra looked up from the letter she was writing and raised an eyebrow, setting her quill down, "Why can neither of you behave like adults?"

"She started it," Cooker mumbled.

Xyra rolled her eyes and reached across the table, dragging the letter back into her work area, "I am the one that has to fix both of your mistakes. Knock it off before I tie you both to chairs and put gags in your mouth."

"Kinky," a voice laughed from the entrance of the room.

Theo looked up to see Morgana clearing the flight of stairs leading up to the third floor, which is where they usually gathered for business. Theo took a minute to take in the sight of a friend that had been gone for so long. Her hair was longer than when they were in Corinspe. All evidence of the lightbringer erased, except a few visible scars along her exposed arms and chest and of course her missing digits. The room burst into a cacophony of welcomes and chaos trying to get to Morgana.

Theo let herself get barrelled by Cooker. She watched each reunion with a smile on her face until it was her turn. She stepped forward and gave Morgana a tight hug, patting her back with a chuckle.

"It's good to see you," Theo pulled away and put her hands on Morgana's shoulders, "I would say we missed you, but Iona has been excelling at your job. I am hesitant to give you leader of the vanguard back."

"Please, Mor, make her take it from me," Iona laughed, "I'm good at combat, I don't enjoy teaching it."

"I'll happily accept the job," Morgana nodded towards Iona then looked to Theo, "spent a few cycles training with The Gurgs. I am unstoppable, not even Xy will be able to take me down."

"Do not test me, I have won thousands in the fighting rings these past cycles," Xyra hummed, she had not stood up from her letter writing. She peeled her attention away from the paper for a moment to look up and flash a smile at Morgana, "good to have you back, mate."

"Good to be back," Morgana put an arm around Theo and walked towards the table, "where is Fortune? I wanted to see her. She doing errands?"

"Errands in Aeliz," Skins chuckled.

"Aeliz?" Morgana frowned, "she moved to Aeliz? And no one wrote to me?!"

"Calm down, meathead," Cooker sat back down next to Xyra, continuing her task, "she's sailing with Navi to find an island to settle down in."

"Oh," Morgana was still frowning, "why her?"

"She's a healer and we needed a reliable one on that voyage," Theo provided context, "she's due back any sun now. She'll be back before the cycle is over."

Morgana had gone from a happy presence to sucking out any joy with her moping, "Figured she would be here. I was looking forward to it."

"Well, you've waited this long. You can wait a bit longer," Cooker shrugged, "are you ready to dive into Niveal life? We have to go out tonight."

Theo looked over with a raised brow and Cooker held her hands up.

"I can't drink, but I'm still fun," Cooker laughed then shrugged a shoulder, "well, a little less fun, but I will still show you a good time."

"You don't need to show me a good time," Morgana chuckled, "Niveal is in my blood. I know how to navigate Stumbler's Row."

"So, we're all going out tonight?" Skins stood up from her corner of the room, having been doing nothing productive before.

"I am willing to," Xyra nodded.

"Me too," Iona smiled.

Theo didn't answer because she knew she could get away with being noncommittal at that time. She had been going out with everyone consistently. She attended more than she flaked, and so her lack of response allowed her to stay quiet without suspicions. The truth was that Niveal had become too much for her. She had started to get used to being on land and enjoying her time there but it was still too much all the time. Too many distractions, too many people, too much noise. She wanted to be out at sea. She was itching to sail again but she hadn't in six cycles. She couldn't leave, she had to be at their base of operations at all times.

"Alright," Skins interrupted the planning of what was going on that night. She stretched and let out a yawn, "If we are going hard tonight, I need to get my rest. I'm going to go nap."

"Shouldn't you be working?" Theo chuckled.

"No recruits. No shopping. So," Skins walked past the table, "no."

"Enjoy your nap," Morgana watched her leave then looked back at the room, that had largely gotten back to work, "what are y'all doing?"

"It's the Mail Meeting. Every five suns we get together to manage our letters and send out responses," Cooker explained as she signed one letter. Theo caught a look and it was significantly better than earlier.

"All of this is from five suns?" Morgana whistled as she picked up a stack of envelopes.

"A lot has happened in the nine cycles you have been gone," Xyra provided, "many new businesses under our protection. A lot of recruitment inquiries. Finding our missing crew."

"All of that sounds thrilling," Morgana put sarcastically, "I've had shit food for a cycle on the way here. Anyone want lunch?"

"I'll come grab lunch with you. My treat," Theo nodded her head towards the staircase.

"Oi! I want lunch too," Cooker complained.

"I'm not going out tonight, you are," Theo said, "stay here and finish your work. I will bring you back lunch."

Cooker muttered something under her breath that caused Xyra to snort. No one else at the table picked up on it which told Theo it was not in Common. She decided to leave it alone, Cooker had been on a kick of being annoying as of late. Childishness was running through her veins and she had stopped one addiction, drinking and loli, to focus on another, systematically making sure Theo had drowned herself by the end of the length.

She had also been extremely close to Cooker. They were still staying in the same room, most of their meals were eaten together and the only time Theo and Xyra weren't around her was when she was hanging out with Agnes. Agnes had a role in Cooker's behavior. They still had yet to make a move on each other when it was clear they liked each other. It was making Cooker jittery and her outlet was degrading Theo's sanity.

"I've been gone for nine cycles, you'd think my arrival would have been much more exciting," Morgana said as she followed Theo towards the exit.

Theo laughed as she guided them down the stairs, "Don't take it personally. We've had a lot of people come and go and come back again. You got the biggest welcome we've seen in a while. So, you should feel good about that."

"It does make me feel a bit better."

"You'll catch up with everyone tonight," Theo assured her as they made their way out of the building, "but right now, let me in on your time away. Was it what you were looking for?"

"Guess so," Morgana shrugged, "I missed Tuni. Was she doing alright when I was gone?"

"Let's talk about you, first," Theo avoided answering, "I'm your captain and I want to make sure you are doing alright before I just hand you responsibility."

"You mean because I was tortured?"

"No, because when you left you were not doing too well."

"Because of the torture," Morgana chuckled, "aye, I'm past that."

"Just like that, huh," Theo shook her head with a smile.

"Once I got all healed up and the physical pain wasn't there to remind me, it was easy," she said as Morgana took the lead, most likely knowing where she wanted to eat, "one morning I just woke up and realized I was angry for no reason. I was fine. They had hurt me, sure. That sucked but there was not much to do about it."

"What a great outlook," Theo said.

"How are you doing with it?"

"I'm getting by."

"Not doing so good, then," Morgana laughed and stopped at a street vendor.

They paused their conversation and Morgana turned to order her food. Theo squeezed in her order in between Morgana trying to decide what type of juice she wanted. Soon, they were sitting across from each other, enjoying lunch under the shade of a tree at the intersection of the top of Stumbler's Row and the Niveal square.

"So, what kind of things did you get up to at home?" Theo asked once she found a break between bites.

"Spent a few cycles with me dad. We went camping a bunch. Spend some good times together. Then my sister came home for a break from school and got some good time with her," Morgana said through her chewing.

"And when did training with the most ruthless fighters the East has ever seen come in?"

"About a cycle after I was there," Morgana wiped her hands on her clothes, "went into town for some supplies and got a bit distracted at a tavern. There were some fighting matches going on, signed up for one just for a bit of extra coin and I was recruited."

"By the Gurgs?" Theo clarified, "as in, someone from the Gurgs asked you to join them?"

"Aye," Morgana took a bite out of her turkey leg, "apparently they are expanding their ranks to prepare for an upcoming revolution. I said I'm already committed to another paramilitary group. The Scorned Woman."

"We are pirates. Not paramilitaries," Theo shook her head with a slight smile, "You still got to train with them even though you didn't join?"

Morgana laughed, "Derwi intervened. Turns out they were training only an hour away from my village. Told me if I could make it on time, I could train with them any sun I wanted. So I made the trek quite often."

"It means alot that you came back," Theo chuckled, "didn't know I would ever get to keep you if the Gurgs asked you to join them."

"I came back for Tuni. Not you," Morgana teased, "you going to answer me about her? How was she doing?"

"I'm not going to answer you, actually," Theo shook her head, "why do you want to know?"

"Because I love her. I want to know how was she doing when I was gone."

Theo sighed a bit and put her plate down, "You can't just expect time to have healed all the hurt that was caused. I don't want to give you any false hope for the future."

"What does that have to do with telling me how she's doing?"

"Because she was miserable without you. She was acting irrationally. Impulsively. Uncaringly. And I don't want you to take that as an indication that you should just jump into each other's arms the moment she gets back," Theo explained, "you need to talk about what happened. Consider taking it slow. Maybe even apologize."

"I am going to apologize. I have it all planned out. I know exactly what I'm going to say and I'm going to explain to her that I know I wasn't nice to her. That I didn't treat her like I always promised her I would," Morgana frowned, looking down at her empty plate. She looked sad, verging on angry but not at anyone in particular.

"I know that a lot of your issues with her stemmed from her involvement with sending Red to prison but you can't be in a relationship with someone you resent..." Theo advised, "you need to deal with it."

"I already have. It's been nine cycles, Cap, I've had a lot of fucking time to think about it," Morgana admitted, "I don't know who I was in Corinspe."

"I've been there."

"You been nice to people lately?" Morgana asked.

Theo laughed, "Aye. I have spent three times as long trying to recover from my mean streak than I ever was actually mean for."

"Speaking of your mean streak," Morgana lit up like she remembered something, "I've been hearing things about Red."

Theo's gut twisted at the fact that the mention of Theo being mean quickly reminded Morgana about Ava. Another reminder of her choices. She wished she could have moved on. Like Morgana said, it had been nine cycles since Corinspe and around eleven since the fight. Over half a length without Ava. Over half a length to have processed and dealt with her choices but it wasn't getting any better.

"Aye, looks like she's making herself at home in the estate," Theo noted and looked down at the roots of the tree, picking at some bark.

"What do you think about it?"

"I try not to."

"Still in love with her, I see."

"I'm not," Theo scoffed, "that's ridiculous. I haven't seen or spoken to her in half a length."

"Love knows no bounds," Morgana sighed, "true love is forever."

"I shouldn't have suggested this," Theo said, "I can't believe I actually paid money to be having this conversation."

"The lunch was great," Morgana laughed, "thank you for that."

"Let's get back so I can set you up with a room," Theo stood up.

Morgana stood up too, "Now, can we talk about the obvious?"

"Hm?"

"How you are doing with the whole torture thing," Morgana said, "how's it been for you."

"Fine."

"Really?"

"Aye," Theo chuckled, "it's been a long time since then, like you said."

"It's alright if you aren't fine, just so you know," Morgana put her arm across Theo's shoulder, "it would make sense if you weren't okay still."

"Why's that?"

"Because they just tortured me. They took something from you."

Theo pulled away from Morgana as they walked, shrugging off the arm that was around her, "Thanks for the concern, but I'm fine."

"Well, I'm ready to talk about it whenever you are. Might be good for us," Morgana said.

"Sure. Maybe sometime," Theo shot over a small smile but there was no way she would take up the offer.

She wasn't lying entirely. Torture had helped her. It helped her grapple with everything. Confronting the pain, the fear, the helplessness. There was one thing it couldn't erase was the guilt. Guilt for buying into the manipulation. Guilt for making a reckless decision. Guilt for sending Ava away. It always came back to Ava. It had been fucking half a length and she just wished the memory could be wiped from her. No matter Ava's intentions with her involvement in her father's affairs didn't change the fact that she was not coming back. Even if Theo's choices hadn't created a monster, a new Vaith Tyrant with intimate knowledge of the underworld, she had sent an innocent person to a life sentence.

Ava had no interest in speaking to her. The absence of a letter from Aubermase, despite the dozen already sent to Ava, was an indication of that matter. And yet, she couldn't get Ava out of her head. She had hoped that over time, her feelings of affection towards Ava and the subsequent guilt over hurting the one she loved would fade away. But she was stuck in the same loop of love, guilt, love, guilt, self-hatred, love, guilt.

She should have attempted to get Ava out of her mind. She should have done more to rid herself of the memories, the nostalgia, the hope. She probably could have if she tried harder but every time she thought about it, she panicked. She couldn't forget her, not when she had been the one to put them in that situation. It was her price to pay and her punishment and 11 cycles later, she still hadn't thought she had paid up. Perhaps in the future, that sun would come. But for then, she was stuck in her cycle.

—----

They were all sitting at the table at their next Mail Meeting, five suns later. Morgana joined them that time, she was on seal duty. Theo as always had no specific thing to do, so she hovered and made sure everything was going to plan. Cooker had stopped her foolishness with Theo's signature and was actually doing a decent job. They had less to do during that meeting, there were no more than five letters that needed to be sent out so there weren't many people in the room. Only Cooker, Xyra, Morgana, and Iona were there. It was early morning so the room was quiet, everyone was a bit sick from the night before. Everyone except Cooker, who was lucky enough to not get pressured into swallowing the whole liquor selection available.

Which is what everyone else in the room had done. Morgana's celebration for her return had continued the night after she got back, and the night after that, and the one after that. It was unsustainable and the pale faces and low moods told her that they would not be going out for quite a bit of time. Entertainment would be water and a show on the first floor of Marian's.

"Done with signing!" Cooker said as she handed her paper to Iona.

"Cook," Xyra warned with a grimace. Her elbow was against the table and her hand was supporting her head as she looked down at the envelope she had in front of her, trying to write the name of the recipient on it, "please."

"Please what?" Cooker stood up quickly, causing her chair to fall back and hit the ground with a thud, "Please, don't speak so loudly?!"

Cooker leaned over in Xyra's direction to make sure most of the noise was heading her way.

"Oh god," Iona stood up too, "I'm going to be sick."

She stumbled forward, putting a hand over her mouth as she ran down the stairs.

"She's been fighting that all morning," Cooker chuckled, "hope she makes it outside and doesn't spew all over the floor."

"Fucking gross," Morgana stood up too, "I'm gonna fucking hurl."

She ran towards the back room.

"Mor! Outside!" Theo yelled after her but she didn't pay attention, she ran opposite the stairs, "oh, come on."

"I'm not cleaning that up," Xyra said as she placed her forehead on the table, "this is why I do not drink. What is the point if you feel like this the next sun."

Theo peeked over into the room and frowned at the sight, "She's puking out the window."

Cooker gagged on purpose and Xyra reached forward, grabbing the first thing that her hand could find and threw it at Cooker, who dodged.

Morgana stepped back out of the room with a hand over her stomach, "Going to go find someone on the cleaning crew to help me figure out a way to get puke off the side of a three-story building."

"Ugh," Theo shuddered.

"Nasty," Cooker laughed.

Xyra just covered her ears, head still on the table.

Morgana left the room and Theo was glad that she hadn't drunk enough to warrant throwing up out of a third-floor window but she wasn't entirely a fully functioning person either. But with Morgana and Iona gone, Theo had to pick up the slack. She was pretty sure Xyra had fully fallen asleep against the table so it was only Cooker and Theo left to finish the rest of the tasks. Which was fairly easy as they were nearly done before the puking fiasco.

"How was last night?" Kaia asked as she came up the stairs.

"Awful," Theo answered, "but looks like I am the least injured soldier that went to battle."

Theo looked over to Xyra who had definitely fallen asleep.

"I kind of needed her," Kaia chuckled.

"What for?"

"To break some news I know you won't be too happy to hear."

"It's about Red, isn't it?" Cooker perked up, then kicked under the table, catching Xyra's leg and waking her up, "wake up, Xy, we've got juicy news."

"Can you stop that?" Theo asked, frowning at the excitement from Cooker.

"Anytime news comes in from Aubermasse, it's going to be an exciting night at Fingen's," Cooker shrugged, "don't harsh my good time."

"This isn't some joke. She was your friend. If we follow the trail of how she ended up there, it starts with you," Theo argued.

"And ends with you," Cooker shot back.

Theo clenched her jaw and looked back at Kaia, "What's the news?"

"She has spoken at three events in the past cycle. A tournament, the Auberrmasse festival, and a dinner with the great houses under the Vaiths," Kaia informed them.

"Not too bad," Xyra spoke up.

"She has also been running the Great Hall Trials."

Theo's head snapped up from where she was looking at her hands and picking at her hangnail. It had become a bad habit, "Running them?"

"Hearing cases, determining the verdict, and assigning punishment," Kaia elaborated and looked down at a piece of paper, "she's heard trials of murder, theft, and accusations of renouncing."

Theo shook her head at the news. She didn't want to prove Kaia right by getting upset but it didn't make sense. Ava had been toeing the line before, never stepping over it to make Theo doubt she was in it for the right reasons. But leading trials and passing sentencing on people who were persecuted for who they were was crossing a line. She was in shock and she felt like she also wanted to throw up. Theo just swallowed and crossed her arms, keeping her gaze on Kaia so she could continue. She knew everyone was staring back at her. Xyra looked the most concerned out of the three, perhaps it was a mixture of concern for Theo and hurt as well. She and Ava had gotten close before everything went to shit.

"That's all?" Theo prompted when Kaia stopped.

"No," she shook her head, "just giving you time to react."

"What's there to react to?" Theo shrugged.

"That's she's hanging people like us," Cooker said.

"We don't know that hanging was their sentences," Theo shook her head.

"Actually, we do," Kaia said and held the paper up, "all crimes were pursued to the highest extent of the punishment suggested by law."

Theo felt the corners of her mouth turn down and tears spring to her eyes. She knew they could tell but she kept the wall of tears welling up behind her eyelids. Clearing her throat, she spoke, "Thanks for the information."

"And she'll be joining her father during his time in the Center and be at his side during Councill Meetings," Kaia said.

She had seen it coming. Theo figured it was bound to happen, what with the trajectory of her political career thus far. She had thought maybe Jona had been trying to get to Theo by hinting at her doing well and being happy but apparently, it was true. It still didn't make sense. She was silent, there was nothing to say.

Cooker got up, "Well, I'm off to Fingen's. They are going to have a riot with this."

Theo had kept her cool that far but something snapped, "Are you fucking serious, Cooker?"

"What? You have a problem with me discussing things that politicians do now that it has to do with your ex?" Cooker asked, "Theo, whoever was on our crew half a length ago is not the same person we keep hearing about."

"You don't know that."

"Yeah, well, until I'm proven wrong I will keep making my opinion about her and her father's policies known," Cooker grabbed her stuff, "Just because she was my friend doesn't mean I can't clearly see what is happening."

She walked out and Theo rolled her eyes looking away, "Thanks, Kai. You can go now."

"Why do you insist on defending her?" Kaia asked.

"Alright," Xyra stood up, "we should stop this. Theo, let's go check the docks to see if any ships are coming."

"What does it matter to you?" Theo ignored Xyra's request.

"Because your judgment is clouded by her," Kaia said, "Cooker is right. What is happening is clear and you can't seem to face it because of your emotional connection to her."

"This has nothing to do with my past with her," Theo clarified, standing up, "I'm the fucking reason she's in Aubermasse right now, sentencing people to death! I cannot stand here and join in on bashing her because the only reason she is in this position is because of me."

"And the choices she's making are her own. No one told her to get on daddy's good side and do what she is doing."

"That is why I'm defending her. The choices don't make sense. She wouldn't do this," Theo shook her head, "something is up. I know it!"

"Wake up, Captain," Kaia sighed, "you left her stranded. That does shit to people. Resentment. Anger. You don't think that's enough to change someone?"

Kaia was angry but Theo couldn't figure out why. It didn't affect the crew in any way.

"She's right," Xyra said and she looked disappointed, "she had the benefit of the doubt before, but now?"

"Her second staunchest defender has now rescinded to the other side."

"Alright, Kai, that is enough. Do not be a dick about it. Let's give her space," Xyra walked over and grabbed Kaia's arm, pulling her out.

Theo watched them leave then walked over to the couch and flopped down on it.

She knew that they were both right. The most likely explanation for everything was that Theo had in fact turned Ava evil. Or, at the very least, apathetic enough to be alright with trying people for crimes she herself committed. Maybe it was just something she justified as a wrong to aid in achieving a bigger right. Or that she needed to do whatever she needed to survive. Theo couldn't know. And she would likely never get the chance to understand. With Ava leaving to The Center and almost a dozen unanswered letters, it was time to move on. It was time to find a way to stop thinking about her, stop the guilt, and somehow learn to forgive herself.

Or at the very least, push all thought of her away and never truly handle it.

Which seemed like the most attractive option. But, Theo had been through too much change in the past length to throw it all away because she was hurt. She owed it to the crew to handle it healthily, or as close to that as she could manage.

—

"She's there," Tuni said and looked over to Navi, "she's back."

"Told you she would be fine. You were worrying for nothing," Navi reached over and squeezed Tuni's knee, "now, no matter how much you fidget, we won't get to the docks any faster."

"I am being perfectly still," Tuni straightened up, "and I am containing my excitement like we spoke about."

"Just don't want you to get your hopes up, Fortune," Navi said, "it's been a long time and you've not written to each other. If you react well and she doesn't match your reaction, I don't want you to get hurt."

"Yes, yes," Tuni sighed and put her hand over Navi's, patting it, "you have been far too concerned about me."

"Let's not forget why."

"Seven cycles ago someone found a bag of ugali I had not even touched," Tuni turned her head to angle away from Navi.

"Don't be mad people care about you," Navi chuckled and bent over, resting her cheek on the top of Tuni's head.

Navi could see the welcoming party coming into view. The sloop had entered Niveal's waters a few hours before and had to clear customs, so they most likely had plenty of time to be informed of Navi's arrival. She could make out her Captain and friends but her eyes were focused on Xyra. Her typical stern face was on, looking out towards the rowboat with an intense stare as if that would will the waves to push them closer to shore.

Eventually, their boat was tied up and ready to exit. The dock was busy so no one came to meet them there. Tuni waited for Navi to climb out before they made their way through the crowds and towards their friends. Tuni had maintained decorum and had kept her excitement at bay until she spotted Morgana leaving the group to come towards them. Navi wasn't fast enough to stop it, Tuni sprinted in front of her and dodged through the sailors trying to get to her long-lost partner.

Navi should have known it wouldn't go to plan. She hadn't accounted for the fact that Morgana would react so positively to their arrival. She didn't hate Tuni when they departed but they certainly weren't on good terms. She walked past them both, patting Morgana on the back silently as she passed. She moved through the crowd with ease, always having a simpler time seeing through the masses because of her height.

Once she made it to her crew, she was greeted with happy smiles and good conversation. She made sure to give everyone a hug or a pat on the back, except Xyra. Who awkwardly stood away from the group waiting to return back to Marian's. Navi didn't mention it or go after Xyra, she wasn't hurt by it. Xyra always liked to avoid public affection. Soon enough after arriving, Navi was escorted back to their headquarters.

They obviously moved straight into business, there was a lot to cover. Navi was good at her job, she knew as much. Sailing had always come naturally to her, it was in her blood. With that, came an ability to navigate rough seas and rough areas. Theo knew that when she sent Navi to Aeliz with a request to scope out islands, she would come back with nothing but a plethora of opportunities.

And she did.

Navi had enjoyed her time away. It was cycles of just sailing, not having to worry about the pirate life. No random raids to go off course for, no frequent stopping. Just her, a small ship with a limited crew, and an endless ocean. Of course, she missed a big ship, a big crew, a big family. But that would always be there. It was rare to be able to be paid so much money to sail for cycles on end. She had a lot of time to herself to think. She spent a lot of that time reflecting, introspecting. She had come a long way since she had started on Theo's crew. Her penchant for revenge had dwindled. The death of her father always weighed on her mind but the revenge that drove her to join the crew in the first place was gone. Navi had realized throughout the lengths that holding onto the anger wasn't good for her. She was not an angry person or a violent one, and her need to see her father avenged had turned her to that lifestyle. It had turned her into someone she wasn't.

But it had been a while since that fury had consumed her thoughts. Still, her time on Theo's ship was not smooth sailing once she decided to heal. She had issues with commitment, being serious, and thinking about others. It had taken her a while to feel like a part of a family and a community and even longer to realize that she was capable of being loved platonically and romantically for who she was and not what she could offer. On her trip, she had realized just how far she had come. Except there was one thing missing from her life. One thing that hadn't been resolved. Xyra.

Navi had been escorted upstairs, and she wasted no time in setting out all of the maps and scrolls she had brought with her.

"I brought many options, obviously," Navi said, "but to me, there is a clear top three and even, in my opinion, a top choice."

"Then let's do that," Skins said, "then we don't have to have the rest of this meeting."

"Our meetings last long because of comments like that," Xyra said and fixed Skins with a glare that meant business.

She laughed at the exchange before guiding them through each possibility. Stressing the positive and negatives of each location and pausing to answer any questions. Of course, most of the interest came from Theo and Cooker. Iona played a role in asking crucial questions and Navi was impressed with the outwardness that Iona displayed compared to her usual reserved nature. She answered enthusiastically, too much in fact. She had to reign it in a bit because she realized that not everyone was thrilled with charting and navigation.

Even though most of the questions came from others, Navi found her attention drifting to Xyra, her gaze slipped over to her after every answer. She wasn't silent because she was disengaged but because she was busy with notes. Listing all of the aspects of the island in a neat, organized fashion to have the most accurate information needed to make a decision. She caught her eyes several times but Xyra wasn't cracking. No smile or acknowledgment of excitement that Navi was back.

Again, she wasn't hurt. She tried to keep from laughing almost every time they did glance in each other's direction. Xyra was always comically serious about her work and Navi expected no less. It was incredible, looking back at it, how much Navi hated Xyra when she first started interacting with the trio in their time before they had a crew. She was rude, abrupt, a control freak, and a know it all with no interest in charm or tact. She could get a read on most people but in the beginning, she could never read Xyra.

The hatred continued even after she joined Theo's crew. But, eventually, after working closely with the first mate, hatred turned to intrigue. So, they started to fuck around. Nothing serious in name but there was never a doubt that their times together were always deep, and passionate. However, Navi was going through a lot at the time. Revenge and anger were still on her mind and she had no intention of committing to anyone or anything. Even her position on the ship wasn't a guarantee in her mind. It wasn't the right time for them.

She thought she had found the right way to live. Free, unattached, angry at those who had wronged her, putting up walls. And Xyra challenged that. Xyra wanted more, even if she didn't say it or show it she craved a deeper connection, and that scared Navi. So Navi never let her get close. She wasn't an asshole but she didn't treat her as best as she could. Eventually, things ended.

But Xyra was addictive

Navi always kept coming back. But so did Xyra. They were not good for each other. Then Navi grew. She became at peace with herself, knew that even if she was with someone she was still free, that she could let go of her anger and resentment. She had never had a temper, per se, but whatever explosiveness she had slowly faded away. She had become a better person, not that she was bad before, but she was undeniably better. A bit more humble. Way more generous with her time, money, and energy and she had finally thought that her Xyra would be good together.

But things got in the way. Xyra thought she was in a relationship. Xyra chose to not speak with her at random. Xyra pushed her away. Overall, Xyra had gotten in the way. But that was fine. Navi had had her issues, it was Xyra's turn to let it get in the way. Now, however, things had shifted. Xyra had started the process of change, of healing. There was something between them that would never go away and they were finally at a place to seize the opportunity. Properly.

She never expected herself to be a fool in love, but she was.

She had been gone for five cycles, as she had promised, and every sun she thought of Xyra. Also, as promised, she had a list of demands. She would walk to the negotiating table prepared and walk out with an arrangement she could trust would make her happy. And make Xyraa happy.

Xyra's lips were moving and Navi realized she should have been paying attention. Important things were afoot. Big decisions were being made.

"I think it is pretty clear which one we should choose," Xyra said, moving her eyes across the table to scan the rough sketches of the islands, she pointed at one, "this one if that was not clear before."

"Any opposed?" Theo looked around the room, there were no objections, "we will bring it to the crew shortly and get their vote on it."

"Thank you, Navi," Cooker said, "fucking fantastic job."

"Aye," Skins laughed, "we've got a sick island. No one is going to be able to get to us."

"Thank you for appreciating my genius," Navi took a bow, "how have things been here?"

"Money keeps rolling in," Cooker provided.

"Recruits are doing well with their training and our crew is bigger," Iona said, "Morgana is vanguard leader again."

"Sorry about the demotion," Navi said.

Iona smiled, "Don't be. It was a relief."

"Cooker is fucking Xyra's sister," Skins said.

"We're not fucking," Cooker said to Skins with a shove then looked over at Navi, "we're not fucking."

"Got it," Navi laughed, "thanks for clearing that up."

"Xy is Stumblers' Row's newest champion fighter," Theo hopped into the conversation, "Tuni can't know that, though. So keep that to yourself."

Navi looked over to Xyra and raised an eyebrow, "Since when are you the fighting type?"

"She's a great fighter, what do you mean?" Skins laughed.

"She doesn't fight outside of self-defense," Navi returned, still looking at Xyra.

"It brings in a thousand gold every championship bout I win," Xyra shrugged, "500 if I lose but still place second."

"So, we're broke and Xyra's fists are our saviors," Navi said.

"We actually don't need the money she brings in," Cooker sold Xyra out, "she's just taken to fighting recently. You should see her, she's a beast in the ring."

"I've witnessed her in a fight, Cook," Navi chuckled, "but I'll take your word for it. I don't think that's the scene for me."

"Can we get back on track?" Xyra asked, "what do we have left?"

"Navi had asked what was new," Iona reminded, "a lot of it was covered though."

"Red," Cooker snapped her fingers, "have you heard about her?"

"No, what's happened?" Navi frowned.

"Passed a bunch of reforms. Is sentencing people to death at trials. Accompanies her father everywhere. Most likely going to be announced as his successor," Kaia listed.

"Are you serious?" Navi shook her head, "that doesn't sound like Red."

"See?" Theo muttered and crossed her arms.

"This again?" Kaia looked over at Theo and Theo just shrugged.

"I'm sensing tension," Navi laughed, "not interested in drama on my first sun back. But if anything does go down, find me to gossip about it."

"Any plans for tonight? Are we fucking the town up?" Skins asked, a glint in her eye.

"Maybe tomorrow," Navi shrugged, "just going to take it easy and see someone I need to talk to."

Her eyes looked over to Xyra, who frowned a bit and looked down at the maps again. She could tell when Xyra was jealous, she had seen plenty of it. There was always a slight tinge of hurt there. She didn't look up, instead, she distracted herself by fixing the papers in front of her even though they didn't need organizing. Navi pulled her attention away to engage in the conversation wrapping up the meeting, gaze always glancing back over to Xyra occasionally.

Eventually, everyone went their own ways. Navi's arrival had taken up most of the morning and everyone had tasks to catch up on. Not Navi though, she was free to roam. Five cycles of working nonstop got her a few suns off. Navi said goodbye to everyone and after a conversation with Cooker and Iona about how they were each doing, they left. Xyra had been the only one that stayed.

Navi walked over and sat at the table next to her, "Got nowhere to be?"

"It is my sun off," Xyra looked over at Navi.

"How have you been enjoying working again?" she asked leaning an elbow on the table.

"I missed it," Xyra chuckled a bit.

"But everything is still good? You've been feeling alright?"

"I have yet to freeze up. I am taking some time to myself for things I like. I am letting things go easier," Xyra shrugged, "I would say everything is still good."

"Good," Navi smiled and nudged her foot forward against Xyra's, "what are your plans tonight?"

"Nothing," Xyra shrugged, "I was going to see if you wanted to spend some time together but it seems you have plans."

"Is that jealousy I sense?" Navi laughed.

"No, you are allowed to do whatever you want. You have been gone for five cycles, I am sure you have things to catch up on."

"How long have we been at this, you and I?" Navi asked and leaned back in her chair, with a smile on her face, "Four going on five lengths now? And you are still as every bit oblivious to my advances as when we first started doing this."

Navi shook her head and laughed again as Xyra tilted her head slightly.

"It's you," Navi explained, "you are the someone I need to talk to."

"Oh," Xyra said, then laughed after a beat, "I am, uh, I am willing to talk."

"Great," Navi stood up, "meet me outside of this building when the sun sets."

"Where are we going to go?" Xyra stood up too.

"That is a surprise," Navi leaned over and placed a kiss on her cheek, "see you then."

—-------

"Where are you taking me?"

"First, I was going to take you to a fancy dinner spot," Navi said, "a Nivealan hotspot, seven courses, 20 gold a person."

"But that is not where we are going?"

"No," Navi assured her, "I distinctly remember you complaining about the fancy Nivealan restaurants every time we are here. You get angry that they charge you so much when you can get the same food for two copper at a tavern."

"I just do not see the point."

"Which is why we are forgoing the fancy food," Navi said and chanced a reach over to take Xyra's hand into her own.

To her delight, Xyra accepted the gesture and adjusted their hands so they were clasped together comfortably.

"Where are we going instead?" Xyra asked.

"Can you not be patient? It is a surprise."

"Not fond of surprises."

"It's nothing you will hate, I promise. In fact, I am taking you somewhere you love, to a mosaic of things you love," Navi chuckled a bit. She could see the confusion register on Xyra's face. A riddle she couldn't solve, too vague, too broad.

Navi had stumped her. Hard. In fact, Xyra was thinking about the comment the whole way to their surprise. Navi kept looking between the street in front of her and Xyra, who was cycling through possibilities on her face. Navi kept a laugh to herself, smiling instead.

"Will you close your eyes now?"

Instead of closing them, Xyra looked around. There was nothing but buildings and people in sight. Navi was not foolish enough to ask her to shield her vision right in front of where she was taking them. Navi laughed and shoved her a bit.

"Hey! I told you to close your eyes."

"No, you asked me to close them. It was a request, and I choose not to comply."

"Don't be difficult. I am only asking you to close them for a five-minute walk."

"Five minutes?!" Xyra laughed, "how will I see where I am going?"

"You are so difficult to do nice things for," Navi shook her head, feigning exasperation, "unbelievable."

"Fine. Fine," Xyra closed her eyes and then held out her hand again, "I need guidance."

Navi took her hand again and guided them through the streets. She eventually had to get closer to Xyra to get her safely to their destination, one arm around her hips and the other holding her hand so she felt steady. Navi had lied, it was more than a five-minute walk. But, if she had given the true amount of time to Xyra then she would try to ruin her surprise by calculating what was that far away.

Xyra didn't let her forget that she had fibbed, every few minutes she had reminded Navi that they had been walking for more than five minutes. Navi chose to ignore the comments and just laugh at Xyra's frustration. Eventually, they arrived at the luxury district where Navi walked them into a large, limestone building. With detailed instructions on when to step and when to avoid certain obstacles, Navi guided them through the building, up several flights of stairs, and finally, she was able to let go of Xyra.

"Stay," Navi commanded and Xya listened.

Navi took a key out of her pocket and opened the door that was in front of them, she left it open and then stepped back to Xyra's side.

"Now you can open."

Xyra opened her eyes and took a second to take in her surroundingss. There was a small crease between her brows as she figured out what was going on. It didn't take her long. Navi watched as her face lit up with recognition of the architecture of the hallway they were in, the details in the light fixtures, and the view into the room she had opened. Xyra turned to face Navi with wide eyes.

"What?" Xyra asked.

Navi simply laughed and took her hand, walking inside the room. The room she had gotten for them was the penthouse at the fanciest hotel in all of Niveal. Xyra hated luxurious food but not luxurious living. Perhaps it was because she spent so long as a child having to share a room on a ship with little to no consistent niceties. Regardless of the reason, Navi knew how Xyra felt about a stay in a good hotel.

"This place is booked cycles in advance," Xyra said, awe in her voice as she looked around the unnecessarily large room, "how did you get it?"

"I can be persuasive," Navi smiled and walked over to one of the several couches littered around the room, plopping down on it. The fabric was expensive, lush, and probably dirty from several people fucking on it.

Xyra didn't speak. She just walked around the room, looking at and touching everything. The tub, the bed, the seating area, the library, and the table with a large spread of snacks and appetizers. As Navi had promised, it was a mosaic of her favorite things. Her favorite win, food, candles, and even robes. She looked like a child on their ment, unwrapping the best presents her parents could afford. Xyra wasn't much for words and Navi didn't want to force her into having to speak her gratitude, it was obvious on her face.

"How about I call for the tub to be filled and we can take a bath while we catch up? Get clean before our negotiations can take place?" Navi put the idea forward.

Xyra nodded, absently. She was staring at one of the lighting fixtures in the room, her hand coming up to touch the metal.

"It's been so long since I have been in this room," Xyra whispered and turned to Navi, "you remembered?"

"Your tenth ment. You and the girls stayed here. The first big thing you ever allowed yourself to spend money on," Navi recalled and stood up from the couch, "then, the first time we came to Niveal as a crew you disappeared for a few nights. You told me lengths later that you had gotten this place to celebrate your 15th ment. A long time ago, you also told me that you were planning on staying here a few nights to celebrate your 20th ment."

"It's not my ment," Xyra looked over at Navi, who had come up behind her.

"It was. I missed it and I am sure you stressed to everyone that you did not want anything big as a celebration," Navi hypothesized and wrapped her arms around Xyra's waist, "and I'm sure you didn't allow yourself the time to come here and complete your wish. So, I thought we could share a little bit of this night together, and then I will leave you to enjoy it. It's yours for three nights."

Xyra rested her head back against Navi's shoulder, "You cannot stay?"

"This is your time to spend here. I know you like to be alone," Navi placed a kiss on the side of Xyra's head, "so, once we've talked. I will leave."

"And if I want you to stay?"

"Then, I will stay," Navi chuckled, "how about that bath? We can have some wine and fruit while we catch up."

Xyra nodded, "That sounds nice."

Navi went to pull away but Xyra stopped her, "I have to go request all of that."

"Give it a moment, come back," Xyra pulled Navi's arms back around her.

Navi obeyed, taking a deep breath of relief that Xyra was happy, and her surprise had fallen into place so easily.

—--

They had sat in the bath until the pitcher of mead was empty, their hands resembled prunes and not human skin, and the water went cold. It was always easy to have a conversation with Xyra. Not many people got to indulge in seeing her relaxed, in watching her throw her head back with a genuine laugh, in hearing her tell a joke or engage in less than serious antics. All of the five cycles they had spent apart were reviewed, Xyra having more to say than Navi.

Navi spoke about the island and Xyra let her speak at length about everything she was excited for. About the small changes she had made along her route that had helped get them there faster. About how she managed as being the one in charge of the crew for once. Xyra listened, a grin on her face the whole time. Then, it was time for Xyra to fill Navi in on everything she had missed. Xyra didn't go into much detail, she never really did, but Navi heard about all of the ongoings. The continued speculation about Agnes and Cooker. The progress her nieces were making while settling in. What had been going on with Ava.

Eventually, they had run out of topics and of all their drink and food so they left the tub. Slipping into silk robes and lounging on the bed instead. In front of them was a tray of meats and cheeses that they had no problem scarfing down.

"We need more," Navi laughed, with her mouth still full, "want more mead too?"

"No," Xyra shook her head and laid back against the mountain of pillows behind her, "got anything else?"

"In my bag, got a bunch of stuff" Navi slipped on her boots, wearing her robe still, "I'm going to get another platter."

Xyra didn't answer and Navi slipped out, looking ridiculous, and found the butler on the floor below them. She placed her order and made her way back to the room. Xyra had moved from the bed to some of the couches that were near the two wooden doors that opened to the balcony overlooking a courtyard. The doors were open and a nice nighttime breeze was passing through. As it did, it whipped the smoke around that Xyra had exhaled.

"You wasted no time," Navi laughed and made it over to the couches, sitting across from Xyra, "oh, and I see you are ready to begin business."

In between them was a short table with Navi's bag and some papers Xyra had brought with her.

"Figured we should get on with it."

"Efficient. Direct. I like it," Navi folded her legs up on the couch and leaned forward to reach into her bag. She pulled out a stack of papers, "who goes first?"

There was a knock on the door.

"Come in!" Xyra said and the butler stepped in, holding a tray. Xyra motioned him over, "right over here. Thank you."

The tray was set down on the table and the man gave them a glare before walking out.

"What did you think he had a problem with. The fact that we're not a koldi couple or that we're smoking," Navi laughed.

"Most likely both," Xyra passed the cigarette across the table, "you should present your terms first."

"Want to scope out the scale of my terms. Determine your plan of approach," Navi nodded, "smart. Smart."

"No," Xyra smiled, "I am just itching to know what's in your papers."

"First, we start simple," Navi looked down at her stack, "I want kids."

Xyra laughed and reached back over to get the ravci, "Alright."

"So easy? No complaints. No reservations?" Navi chuckled, "well, I was joking. Just to test the waters. So relax. Those aren't in my terms."

"If they were, I would say yes."

Navi rolled her eyes with a smile, "Okay, these are real. I want the following: a union ceremony that is so amazing that people talk about it for classifications."

"Easy."

"I want you to take one full sun off every ten suns so we can spend it together. Even if we don't spend it together, you have to spend it taking it easy."

"Done."

"You have to learn how to cook Safritian dishes so you can help me once we live on the island and don't have a cook," Navi listed.

"If you are my teacher, I will excel."

"I want Cooker to be on my side of the ceremony planning," Navi continued.

"Of the union ceremony?" Xyra asked with a slight frown.

"Aye," Navi nodded, "you know. We'll split responsibilities for planning and we each get a team to help us accomplish it."

"Hold on," Xyra said and crossed one leg over the other, thinking for a moment, "you would get Morgana. I would get Tuni-"

"Woah, you get Tuni?"

"Trade her for Cooker," Xyra said with a raise of her eyebrow.

"We'll come back to this," Navi said as she flipped to her next page, "I want to choose the rings or whatever symbol we end up using."

"This is just sounding like union ceremony planning," Xyra relit the cigarette that had gone out and took a few puffs, "which isn't a problem but I thought this was more like terms for our relationship."

"I have plenty of those too," Navi chuckled, "I will leave the union terms for later."

"Can't wait to hear them," Xyra took another few puffs before handing off the cigarette.

Navi took a hit before continuing, "No more lying. No lies. No secrets. No fibs. No matter what it is."

"Aye," Xyra agreed, "that can happen."

"And we cannot sleep with anyone else unless we both consent and are present for it," Navi added.

"Sounds good to me."

"You are just agreeing to everything, huh?"

"I plan on saying no to very little," Xyra laughed and slouched into the couch, at peace and relaxed. Navi took a moment to watch her, getting distracted by tracing her face with her eyes.

Then, she looks back down at her papers with a grin and warm cheeks, "Before we go to sleep, we have to check in with each other. Our emotions, thoughts, and opinions. And in addition to that clause, we cannot go to sleep angry with one another."

"I will spill my heart to you every night," Xyra gave in once again.

"You go now. I have more but I want to see what you have."

Xyra chuckled a bit and looked at her papers then scrunched her nose, "I only have two things."

Navi put her pages down and let her mouth hang open for a moment.

"Liar."

"I could not think of anything besides these two things. I tried to imagine scenarios that would cause me to not want to be in a relationship with you and there were none. No limits. I just figured I would let you start and see if I had any more ideas."

"The one time you slack off and it's for our relationship," Navi stood up with a frown, "not off to a very good start."

Xyra straightened up and also frowned, clearing her throat, "You are right... I don't know what I was thinking."

Navi walked over to Xyra's couch and sat down next to her, pushing her back to get her to relax again, "I'm fucking with you, babe. I like that I'm the one that went overboard this time."

She settled into the couch, leaning against Xyra and resting her head against her chest.

"Let me see," Navi held her hand out for the paper and Xyra handed it over.

"My first request is that you live with me. Once we move to the island, I want to live together. In the same house, or room, or tent, or tree, or whatever we end up having to live in."

Navi looked up at Xyra with a smile, "I would love to live with you."

"And my second is that no matter what we are doing, we retire in ten lengths."

"Ten?!" Navi laughed, "I don't think we'll make it that long. We'll be old as hell."

"We will be thirty. Plenty of people live long and happy lives after they are thirty," Xyra chuckled and took her paper back.

"Does it have to be that long?" Navi asked, "can we do five?"

"You think whatever happens in the next few lengths, with all of this uneasiness is going around Baethos, that it will be over in five lengths?" Xyra hummed, running her fingers up and down Navi's arm.

"Probably not. But I would hope so," she sighed a bit, "how about seven?"

"Whatever we are doing in seven lengths, no matter what, we drop it," Xyra repeated and then shrugged, "sure. That works for me."

"We are seven lengths away from retirement," Navi cheered, "how much money do you have saved up for retirement?"

Xyra laughed, "Nice try."

"Damn!" Navi sat up and face Xyra as she laughed, "it is part of my terms. I want to know how much you are worth."

"I am priceless," Xyra joked and pulled Navi onto her lap, "I gave you my terms. You have any more?"

"I do," Navi nodded, "but nothing that I think you will say no to now that I know you are agreeing to everything."

"Let's finish going through it."

"Let's wait until later," Navi said and placed her hands on Xyra's chest, "I've waited so fucking long to get my hands on you, fucking cycles. I just sat in a bathtub staring at you naked for the past three hours."

"You were the one that suggested this process," Xyra laughed and placed one hand on Navi's hip and used her other hand to pull the knot off her robe, "and now you want to stop?"

"I don't want to stop. I want to postpone," Navi said and put a hand on Xyra's cheek.

"Postponing the talks means postponing officially calling this a relationship and I cannot wait any longer," Xyra said and took Navi's hand off her cheek and kissed it, "you are leaving again to go settle on the island next cycle and I want as much time as your partner as I can take."

"My partner," Navi smiled, "I like the sound of that."

"How about this. I will blindly agree to every single one of your terms, except for you getting Cooker to help you with the union. That way, negotiations will be out of the way and we can really do this," Xyra offered.

"It's all so clinical," Navi said in a sultry tone, "so procedural."

"How are you getting turned on by that?" Xyra laughed.

"I've told you how much I love when you are in your element."

Xyra rolled her eyes and squeezed Navi's hand, "Will you be my partner?"

"I will," Navi smiled, "will you be mine?"

"Aye, it would be the greatest honor of my life."

Navi laughed to try and brush off being flustered but it didn't work. Xyra could tell. Suddenly, Navi was flipped around and she was laid down on the couch, Xyra coming to hover over her.

"I have been dreaming about this for so long," Xyra said and leaned forward.

"I love you," Navi blurted out before Xyra could kiss her.

Xyra pulled away and opened her eyes with a smile, "That's no secret. It's pretty obvious."

Navi let the joke slide and she pulled Xyra down by the robe until their lips met for the first time in cycles.

—-----------------------

Theo hopped off the last stair leading to the ground floor and made his way behind the bar. Tuni was leaning over a box, filling it with different bottles. Theo walked over and stood in front of her, leaning against the bar. Tuni was bringing up supplies before their semi-cycle meeting because afterward, they were going to have a party for just the officers. Theo cleared her throat and Tuni looked up.

"How come I haven't seen you in four suns?"

Tuni pat Theo's arm with a smile, "I have been busy."

"You've been gone for five cycles and I don't even get the luxury of a greeting?"

"I greeted you!" Tuni gasped, "Just a few hours ago. I gave you a hug and I told you how good it was to see you."

"Four suns after you arrived."

"I was in the woods," Tuni said and bent down, pulling the case of liquor out from behind the bar in an attempt to escape, "camping with Morgana."

Theo put her foot on the crate and stopped it from moving, "Right. So, let me recap. You come back from five cycles away from the crew and don't say hello to anyone in favor of running into the arms of your ex-lover that you hadn't seen in over half a length after things ended badly. Then, you disappear with said ex-lover for a long time just to reemerge from your stint as a woodland fairy as if nothing happened."

"Not entirely true," Tuni smirked a bit, "I am not acting as if nothing happened."

"What does that mean?" Theo laughed and took her foot off the chest of liquor, putting some extra bottles from the bar back inside.

"Nothing," Tuni shrugged and put her hand on the counter, "just saying, something happened and I am not acting as if it did not."

Theo looked down at the counter next to them and spotted a ring. She picked up Tuni's hand and look at Morgana's mother's ring. She narrowed her eyes with a frown as she looked between the hand and Tuni.

"How did I know I would get that exact look?" Tuni laughed as she pulled her hand away.

"Because you knew that this is a situation that calls for that reaction."

Tuni shook her head and placed her hand on Theo's cheek, "I know you worry about me but I will have you remember that I have always been able to take care of myself."

"You don't think things through when it comes to her," Theo said and pulled Tuni's hand off the counter, holding it in her own, "I'm not saying it is bad. Just saying that you love her and that tends to blur things for you."

"I would not let her mistreat me again," Tuni squeezed Theo's hand.

Theo nodded, "For my peace of mind, can you at least tell me how you moved past what happened in Corinspe?"

"She apologized," she smiled, "for all of it. For invalidating what I went through... For blaming me for something that I had no control over. For not talking to me about her resentment in areas she was justified in being angry with me for... For trying to push it all aside without trying to face her consequences."

"That's-" Theo nodded, impressed, "yeah, that sounds great, Fortune."

"And I also apologized. For my role in not dissuading you from hurting Red and for walking away instead of calling her on her bullshit," Tuni chuckled a bit, "she had this paper that her father helped her make. There were all of these symbols that she had made up with him so that she could remember everything in her apology. She had thought long about what she wanted to say and what she needed to apologize for."

"Sorry for doubting you," Theo said, "but one more question. Why the sudden change?"

Theo tapped Tuni's ring, asking why she had agreed to forgo all her previous rules and objection to being in a union.

"It was another thing she apologized for," Tuni smiled, a bit of sadness behind it, "she threw my rules back in my face after having agreed to them. It turns out, it was not something she was entirely happy with and did not know what to say or how to say it."

"She apologized and all your rules vanished?"

"Stop being so cynical all the time," Tuni shook her head, laughing as she did, "she apologized for not having a conversation about how she felt about it. So this time, we talked about it more. We each presented our side and it turns out mine was a bit less compelling, even to myself."

"So, you are still promised to her?" Theo clarified, "and you are happy with this?"

"Aye," Tuni gave Theo's hand one last squeeze before pulling it away, "over the moon. I did not realize how much holding onto the past had not allowed me to heal. Trusting that Morgana would never do to me what happened to my mother and others like her is new. I have always had faith in her but never in this way and now I do. Wearing this ring and being happy that myself and another person will be committed to each other for life is new, I know, but it is not bad."

Theo stepped around the crate and pulled Tuni into a hug, "I just worry about you. I'm sorry if it comes off like I do not trust your decisions."

Tuni hugged back, "I do the same to you. Do not worry, child."

But Theo wasn't off the hook, why would she be.

Tuni pulled away and looked up at Theo, "Morgana told me about what is happening with Red."

"Wild times," Theo shrugged and bent down to pick up the box of liquor, aided in part by Tuni.

"How are you feeling about it?"

"No use in talking about it," Theo said, strained under the weight of the box.

Tuni forced them to put it down once they were halfway across the room, "This is probably something you should speak about. I am sure it is not a nice feeling to see the woman you loved doing this."

"I need to get over it," Theo looked down at her feet before closing her eyes. She shook her head, "there is nothing for me to do. I have tried to contact her since leaving Corinspe and nothing is working. Half a length later, I should just take the hint and move on with my life."

"You have been trying to contact her?"

Theo paused. She forgot that she was keeping it a secret. Sometimes, Tuni was too easy to talk to and she would rope Theo in.

"Please, keep that to yourself."

"I will," Tuni promised, "and you have not heard anything back from her?"

Theo shook her head, "I was told that she knows how to reach back out to us and she hasn't. Don't say that to anyone either... Everyone has already started to doubt her innocence in all of this happening with her father and I cannot make it worse."

"Why?" Tuni asked, "would their perceptions not be true?"

"I feel like I owe her this much," Theo admitted with a dry laugh, knowing how pathetic she sounded, "I put her in a position where she felt like what she is doing is her only way out or I hurt her so much she suddenly abandoned all morals and became a power-hungry villain. Which isn't hard to imagine given I kind of went there myself for a few cycles."

"My lips are sealed."

"Thank you," Theo whispered, "now, we have a meeting to attend."

Theo did most of the heavy lifting up to the third floor. Usually, Theo would try and keep alcohol away from everyone when it came to their meeting but that night was a special occasion. That night marked the beginning of what Skins and Gianna had called spirit sprint. In other words, it was the bender that had yet to happen. All of their ships were docked for the first time since they arrived at Niveal. Business had been voted to come to a complete halt by the crew and for five suns, everyone would rejoice in a break and in camaraderie. Obviously, not all work could be forgotten but it would be minimal upkeep. That night kicked off the sprint, after the meeting they would then turn to party. The third floor has been sectioned off just for them that night. The rest of the crew would be partying around Niveal. The sun after that, partying would be grouped depending on the ship one was assigned to, the night after that partying groups would be based on position and department, and finally, a second crew wide bender with the officers included would wrap up their sprint, with the officers included. Tonight, however, it was just the officers; old and new.

Not even a few suns before, they had held a vote to reform the group of officers. Navi, Iona, Tuni, Morgana, Xyra, and Cooker were all reconfirmed. There was no limit to who could be an officer but the nomination and election process only produced a handful of extra officers to replace the three they were missing. Skins, Gianna, and Kaia were welcomed into Theo's 'inner circle. Surprisingly, both Blue and Luc were also made officers with little crew-wide pushback. But some notable people were missing. Sabre, for example, had shown mastery with the sloop on raids and was promoted to Captain. She had the nomination for officer but didn't take it. She said it was a conflict of interest since she was in a relationship with Iona. Iona said it was because she was too lazy.

Once the liquor had managed to reach the top floor and be hidden away in a corner, Theo walked over to the table and sat down.

"Quick Meeting," Theo said and snapped her fingers, "first up."

"No updates from me!" Navi said as she took a hit of her ravci before blowing it out the window, so as to not disturb Gianna who was sitting a few feet away.

"Skins already bought me everything I needed for the upkeep of the ships," Gianna joined in after Navi had said her piece.

"Aye, and everything has been ordered for next cycle's first ship back to the new island," Skins followed up before getting up and sitting on Navi's couch, taking the cigarette, "and I'm already working on the orders for the next three we are sending out. Also, after careful consideration. I've realized I'm not a woman."

Everyone looked over at Skins, who just shrugged.

"Crew has been selected and are undergoing preparations for that voyage. We are projected to send that ship off in time," Xyra said, moving on from the casual revelation.

"And the plans for packing up operations in Niveal and informing everyone of the switch to a new place is being worked on by Kaia and I," Cooker interjected, "those plans should be finalized before that first ship comes back with news of a successful settlement."

"Training for everyone is going well. No updates," Morgana interjected, "Iona and I have been teaching survival to the first of the settlers. I think they are improving."

Theo nodded, "Anything else?"

"I think I should join Navi again," Tuni spoke up, "she will be leading the first ships to settle out there and I think I should be there too."

Theo looked over to Morgana who looked bothered but not surprised.

"Navi, you are in charge of that first mission," Theo deferred the decision over, "you want Fortune there?"

"I will need a healer and a damned good one at that," Navi nodded, "and she knows the island, the route, and the crew I took out there before. I would be happy to take you, Tuni."

"Everybody else alright with the ship you were assigned to leave with?" Theo looked around. Most everyone had a loved one or a close friend they didn't want to leave. But with a growing number of ships and a staggering settlement schedule, with ships leaving every half a cycle instead of all at once, people were bound to be split.

No one said anything. Which meant that Morgana and Tuni would be separated once again since Morgana would not actually be leaving to the settlement. Like Theo and others, she would not leave Niveal until the settlement was ready. They had an intricate plan, with those most capable of starting a small village infrastructure leaving first, with reinforcements and supplies behind them. When that was going on, Theo and some others would stay back to ensure the business was still running and secure the transition between Niveal and their new island. Finally, when word arrived that a settlement was successful, their plan to fully transition would begin.

Theo didn't want to think about all of her support and her friends slowly dwindling. Leaving her one by one. First Navi and Tuni, then Kaia, then Xyra, then Cooker until it was her and a ship full of people that were not necessarily all fighters, going across the Baethan ocean. Which is why Morgana had to stay back, she needed at least one strong fighter with them.

"Blue, how are things looking on your front?" Theo asked.

"Fjord and I have been narrowing it down," he replied, "If she is in prison, we think she is most likely in The Center, or any large jail along the west coast of North Elox."

"Which gives us, like, a million options," Cooker said.

"Nine," Xyra said, crossing her arms with a frown.

"Nine," Blue confirmed, "but we are working on narrowing that down."

"At your request, we have a team and a ship on standby that will stay in Niveal until we transition, just in case you pinpoint her location before then," Theo updated him and he nodded in return, "is that all?"

No one said anything so she clapped her hands, "Meeting over. Enjoyment can commence."

—---

Theo was fucked up. Not any more than she had ever been but she was pretty drunk. She was firmly rooted in reality, things were not floating and swirling but she couldn't be counted on to have an intelligent conversation. She was spread out on the floor, really familiarizing herself with her breathing. She looked down at her chest as it expanded and contracted. She rolled her head to the side because an unpleasant noise entered her ears. Right next to her, towering above her were Morgana and Tuni on the couch. Tuni and Morgana's lips were smacking together and Theo was wildly uncomfortable. But, she couldn't bring herself to move.

She turned her head to the other side, focusing on the other side of the room where a conversation was going on amongst a group of officers. Navi and Xyra were next to each other, holding hands and leaning into each other. Navi was glowing and Xyra had a slight smile on her face, they looked happy to be in each other's presence and Theo rolled her eyes. Why did she have to be forced to face all the couples?

Theo sat up but was met with yet another saddening sight. Sitting atop the table, crisscrossed and facing each other were Cooker and Agnes. Agnes was not an officer but had snuck up with a few other crew members a few hours back. They were having a conversation but were not a normal distance apart. Both of them had leaned forward and were far too close for just friends. Cooker told a joke at the moment she stood up and Agnes threw her head back as she clapped her hands together. Theo watched as Cooker visibly melted, tilting her head and letting a goofy grin overtake her face.

Fuck that.

She couldn't stand to be around couples any longer. Theo stood up and walked towards the room that used to be Cooker's, the C still carved into the wall. It was also the puke room but luckily, that had been cleaned already. She opened the door to find Kaia sitting in front of the window. She looked over at the creaking of the door and held out her cigarette of ravci, if the smell was any indication. She chuckled a bit and walked over.

"I shouldn't," Theo took it, sitting next to Kaia, "but I will."

"I need help finishing it," Kaia said, "thank you for the help."

"Why are you hiding out in here?" Theo asked.

"Everywhere I looked, people were giving each other a doting look," Kaia coughed a bit, even though she didn't have the cigarette, "could not handle it."

"We find ourselves here for similar reasons," Theo passed the ravci back.

"Are we sad?" Kaia chuckled, "Pathetic?"

"A bit. We've worked with each other for nine cycles now and neither of us has had any romantic or sexual prospects. Solely for lack of trying."

"Just sitting and mulling about those we cannot have," Kaia frowned a bit then looked over, "I am sorry. Deeply."

"For?" Theo looked over.

"For questioning your personal choices," Kaia answered, "and making a big deal about you not wanting to jump on the hate towards the Vaith girl."

Theo took a deep breath, ignoring the name, "That's alright... You were right."

"I wasn't looking for that."

"Didn't think you were. I just thought you should know that I heard what you said. And I am taking it into account."

"How's that?" Kaia asked.

Theo took a deep breath, holding in for a few seconds before exhaling, "I'm trying to get over it, like you suggested."

"You shouldn't have to rush into anything just because I've been pressuring you and getting angry with you over having emotions," Kaia frowned, "I apologize again for bringing this on."

"No," Theo shook her head and reached over, taking a sip of Kaia's ale, "it was necessary. It's just the last time I doubted her, she ended up back home. I felt guilty doing it again but the facts are the facts..."

"I'm sorry you have to deal with the guilt. I can see you carry it with you."

"Is it that obvious?"

"No," Kaia reassured with a sad smile, "but it's an emotion I can spot from very far."

"Is it something you know how to cope with too? Because that is some advice I could use right about now," Theo admitted because it was true, because every sun she said she would will Ava from her mind had been a bust. She wasn't fading from memory.

"I won't be helpful in that regard," Kaia looked out the window, "I suppose me getting angry at you about her is because it reflected a part of me I don't really like to face."

"What part is that?"

Kaia shook her head and flicked the butt of the cigarette out the window, "Not important. Drinking makes me say things."

"Why are you so reserved? You tell Xyra and Navi things."

"You're the captain, Theo," Kaia shook her head, "there is a level of respect and decorum one has to have with captains. It's the rule of our trade."

"That's some Uncilo, old-timer shit. I want to know my officers. I know nothing about you and I don't just want to look at a file or ask someone else," Theo argued, sitting up in her chair trying to catch her crewmate's gaze.

"When I see you, I see me, alright?" Kaia crossed her arms but still didn't catch Theo's eyes, "I see you and I see myself longing for someone that isn't going to come back. I see you and I see the guilt that has been eating away at me for lengths. Is that enough for you, Theo?"

"Is this about Ty?" Theo asked and finally, Kaia's head snapped over. Her eyes darted around, searching Theo's face. She was probably shocked at hearing the name.

"Why is this crew so fucking pushy?"

"You can thank your enemy that's in the Elox right now. This all started with her," Theo tried joking.

"Even more of a reason to dislike her," Kaia mumbled.

"I am sorry you lost them. I know that must have been hard."

"No. You don't know," Kaia took the ale and took a sip, "your partner dying? There is no pain like it."

"And the pain turned to guilt?" Theo asked.

"They are separate. Different. Both still there," Kaia said.

"Why guilt?"

Kaia shook her head once again but after a few moments, she had gatherer the will to explain, "I was supposed to stop working for good. We were at a good place. We were about to leave Corinspe to go traveling. We had saved enough money, there was Head of the Council I had to work towards, we had an intimate, unforgettable union ceremony. I think about that time alot, the world was just us for a while."

"Then you went back to work," Theo filled in the blanks.

"I did. A job came to my doorstep and I couldn't turn it down. I just had to have it," Kaia shifted in her seat, her back turned closer to Theo in an attempt to shield the side of her face from being observed, "Selfishness took over. Pride in my career seeped into my veins and I couldn't shake the feeling that I had given up on something so promising. It wasn't about the money. It was about the fucking power and the title and the name. Living up to some sort of legacy my father always told me I needed..."

"What was the job?"

Kaia shrugged, "Something that wasn't worth losing Ty over..."

"What did you have to do with losing them?"

"They were upset with me. I had promised, I had made a commitment. We were about to leave. Ty was never a fan of Corinspe, even though they had been a pirate their whole life," Kaia let her guard down a bit and most likely without realizing, sat back in her chair and allowed Theo to watch her. There was a tear rolling down her cheek. A singular one.

She continued, "Not only was I leaving them. I was leaving them all alone in a place they hated. They had quit their job when we had finally decided to settle down but they were so desperate to get off Corinpse they took a quick transportation job. It was to be done before I got back and everything was supposed to be fine."

"It wasn't," Theo provided.

"They took a job handling green glass. Explosive as a weapon, poison to those that handle it...." Kaia said but Theo knew. Kaia dropped her gaze to her hands, "By the time I returned, they were too sick to stand. I got two cycles with Ty before they died. And every sun I watched them get worse and worse. All I could think about as I looked over them was how much I wanted to go back to that world where it was just us. No healers or medicine or pain. But I couldn't. Because I made that choice. I left."

"They made a choice too," Theo said even though it wouldn't help, she knew that. All she could do was put a hand on Kaia's thigh.

"Now you see why I got frustrated with you?" Kaia changed the subject, looking over.

"Not really."

"You made a choice. Sure. But so did she. No one has asked her to saddle up to her father."

Theo was going to combat her statement and argue against it but it was no use. It was true that Ava had made her choice. She was taking her own route to whatever end goal she was imagining. Theo had given her a way out, the choice was hers not to take it. That realization didn't absolve Theo of her sin or her guilt but not jumping to Ava's defense was progress.

"I kept seeing you dwelling on the past and on her and I was faced with myself. Me getting angry with you was my way of trying to yell at myself to wake up," Kaia admitted, "it hasn't quite worked. But I owed you an apology."

"No need,'' Theo waved her off, "I've been insufferable lately. You had every right."

"Is that really how you see yourself?"

"I've been switching between moping and being a hopeful fool... I think insufferable is a nice word for me."

"Hm," Kaia nodded.

"What was that?" Theo laughed.

"I mean since whatever depressive episode you had on the way down from Corinspe, you haven't really shown any of that. No moping. You do take up odd hours. Disappear into the lightbringer and no one can find you. You have your quirks," Kaia teased and nudged Theo, "but insufferable? Not that I've seen."

Theo nudged her back, "You don't have to boost my ego."

"Captain, I have been on many crews. Dozens. What is one thing that always happens to the person in charge?"

"They get the most money."

Kaia shook her head, "They get their names dragged through the mud. Not in public, but in private? The crew talks so much shit, everyone is at risk for dysentery."

Theo laughed.

"I keep an ear open. It's what I've always done. Pushing a crew away from mutiny is something I have regularly had to do and I would be willing to do it for you in a heartbeat but I've never heard a single negative thing about you," Kaia looked over at Theo with a slight smile.

"You are lying," Theo rolled her eyes.

"I have heard complaints about direct supervisors. I have heard complaints about other crews. I have heard people being worried about you. I have heard of problems they have that they talk about bringing to you. I have heard a trove of compliments about you and your leadership but never have I heard a crossword being uttered about you."

Theo didn't know why but she was frowning. That same anxiety and doubt she always had was bubbling inside. Why her? What was it people saw in her that she couldn't see in herself? Why was she so easily forgiven?

"I joined your crew for a reason. You had this air about you, something I couldn't pinpoint," Kaia stood up, reaching over to squeeze Theo's shoulder, "still can't put my finger on it. You are just special, kid. So fucking special and I am lucky to be serving under you..."

"Kai," Theo took a sharp breath in, overwhelmed by the compliment. She couldn't say anything else.

Kaia only let out a slight laugh and left Theo alone in the room.