"What will I have to do to get you to kiss me?"

The words registered first and the request hit second. When it did, every word in all the languages she had at least an amateur grasp on exited her vocabulary. Of course she wanted nothing else but she couldn't slap herself into action. She watched as Ava's mouth twitched, perhaps trying to keep a satisfied smile at bay. She had always known how to fluster Theo.

Ava raised an eyebrow and tilted her head, almost as if it was a challenge. But the invitation couldn't be accepted. The door opened and Theo whipped her head toward the intruder. She had wanted to see no one until morning– in hopes of getting as much time with Ava and as much information as she could muster– before revealing to her crew that Ava was in Niveal.

That wouldn't be possible. Cooker was the last person she had wanted to catch Ava and yet that is who had come bursting into the room. Bursting wasn't quite accurate but it sure felt the same. She couldn't believe it had been her of all people, Cooker never needed to check in with the other officers before forming her opinion on something. In fact, she would now run to everyone and voice her displeasure.

And by the look on her face, that is the direction it was going. Her head was darting between the two of them, a scowl on her face.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

Theo stood up and took a few steps forward, holding her hand out and slipping the other in her pocket, "Cooker, whatever you are going to say can probably wait until after things are explained."

"I'm sure you would prefer me to be silent, you lying bastard," Cooker stepped into the room and slammed the door behind her, "Maybe you need to see a healer for your compulsion in hiding things from people you promised honesty."

Theo couldn't help but laugh and that was the wrong thing to do because it just made Cooker angrier.

"This is funny to you?" Cooker scoffed.

"Aye it is funny to me, I haven't done a single thing wrong," Theo challenged, "I had no idea she was coming."

Cooker narrowed her eyes and looked between the both of them. Theo narrowed her eyes right back. She could feel Ava standing from her seat on the couch behind them.

"Care to explain?" Cooker asked, looking past Theo and addressing Ava, "you just decided to show right back up on our doorstep? No knowledge or care if we would accept you back?"

Theo frowned, stepping in front of Cooker's line of sight to block Ava from the advisor, "If you understood she was doing us a fucking favor, you would be kinder with your tone, Cooker."

"Red's staunchest defender," Cooker crossed her arms as she and Theo stared down, "should have known that part of you never went away."

Theo needed to be a calm and level-headed leader. A captain. Cooker pointing blame and her small outburst of opinions were normal, it was on Theo to not react. If she reacted, Cooker wouldn't back down. Then, they would be in the middle of a fight that wasn't about anything they were upset at in the first place.

"Red came back to inform of us some things," Theo explained and looked back at Ava who was watching the interaction in hopes to be able to speak soon. Theo could tell when there was something to say on the tip of her tongue, "If you agree to behave rationally, maybe we can have a conversation."

Cooker grunted and shoved Theo on the shoulder, her way of releasing whatever misguided frustration had built up and Theo could only react with a half laugh as she rolled her eyes. And if she was honest with herself, letting go of the smaller things was easier when her soul felt so full.

"I'm ready to listen without strangling you, Red," Cooker called out, "you can step out from behind your courageous knight and face me."

Ava did just that and as Theo glanced over to see her emerge and stand next to Theo, she had a slight smile on her face.

"Hi Cooker, it's been a while," she said politely, with a reserved grin, "you're looking healthy."

"I can't say the same for you," Cooker frowned as she looked Ava from her toes to her hair– lacking any form of subtly, "pressure gettin' to you?"

"I'm being methodically starved when I stay at Aubermasse," she deadpanned and Cooker's frown stayed on her face.

Theo could tell that Cooker had started to shift from the offense to a more diplomatic mindset. She looked upset at Ava's revelation, Cooker had always had slightly too much empathy. It was Theo's curse too; they had absorbed all the compassion that Xyra lacked.

"I came with the revolution," Ava said when she realized Cooker would not answer her previous comment, "I came here to try and convince the crew to join them."

Cooker kept her face neutral but her eyes rapidly moved between Ava, Theo, and the wall behind them. She was processing, quicker than any of them could ever be lucky enough to. In the few seconds that Ava had revealed her intention, Cooker had probably had a million thoughts.

"Your brother is here. Two of them, actually. Cameron came too since this is disguised as our honeymoon," Ava reached down and twisted her ring, "tomorrow, they expect a meeting. From what I can tell, it will be just you two and him."

"Which was our request," Theo reminded Cooker of the letter they had last sent out to the revolution in response to a request for an audience.

"I recall," Cooker said, voice gruff, mind still running wild. She was likely trying to solve issues that none of them could even know to expect, "why'd he choose you to come speak to us?"

"I forced him to find a way to bring me. I convinced him that I could get you on board with the rebellion and without me, he would fail upon arrival."

"But you couldn't know that would be the outcome," Cooker accused, "unless you had someone that could assure you it would all turn out alright."

"It was a risk and I took it. At first, I was just blinded by the fact that someone was going to get close enough with the crew that I could be there and see everyone again and find some sort of closure," Ava walked back to the couches and sat down, putting her hands over her knees, "then, I found something out that I knew you both needed to be aware of."

"Which is?"

"Going to be explained when we have everyone here," Theo interrupted, knowing that it wasn't something that could be brought up right then without Cooker focusing on it for six hours. Now that Ava's presence was discovered, she needed to round up the officers and strategize with Ava by their side.

"When?" Cooker asked.

"Tonight. Right now. We should get going," Theo prompted them and Cooker shook her head, holding her arm out to stop Theo from moving.

"I want to hear from her," Cooker jutted her chin toward Ava, "They sent you here to sweet-talk us into joining?"

"No, just into taking a meeting with them."

"Where they will sweet-talk us into joining," Cooker countered.

Theo didn't understand the tone Cooker was taking toward the rebellion. She was the one officer that was actively campaigning for their involvement.

"Well," Ava shrugged, "they will try and get you to join a trial mission. A test to see if the partnership goes well."

Theo hadn't been made aware of that. Shock must have crossed her face when she reacted to the news because Ava jumped to explain.

"I forgot. I completely had misspoken when I said I knew no details beyond the meeting."

"That's alright," Theo could see the genuineness on Ava's face, she could also see that Ava was searching for anything else she may have missed.

"It's not alright!" Cooker butted in, "What else will she have conveniently forgotten to tell us?"

"There has been a lot of catching up to do," Theo defended.

"Aye, I could see that you two were getting reacquainted when I walked in," she called them out.

Theo couldn't help but laugh, the unseriousness she felt in her chest being the effects of what they had smoked between them. Which was in contrast to Cooker who was agitated, over nothing, but agitated nonetheless. No one had lied, no one had manipulated, and yet Cooker was in a fit.

"What is it with you and laughing?"

"It wasn't like that, nothing was happening between us," Theo provided.

"So, I didn't just walk in on you three seconds away from fucking?" Cooker clarified as she pointed between them.

"Given we had all our clothes on, Cooker, no you didn't," Theo walked back over to her drink cart and poured Cooker some water, hoping it would help regulate her.

Cooker took it without even giving Theo a hard time about it. She chugged it and handed it back to Theo before walking forward and standing in front of where Ava was sitting. She sat down on the table in front of the couch and motioned toward the noble.

"Fine, let's hear it, what is it you know about this mission they want us to go on?"

"Break into Drokian prison to free one of their people. That is where Oceane's father is at so I assumed once you knew that, you would agree to their mission. Two benefits, one prison break. Which you've already done with no planning."

"Great, I've heard what I needed to. I'll go round people up," Cooker stood back up, "are you headed back to your lightbringer, Red?"

"I have to stick around until dawn, and I didn't come in a lightbringer. I came on your father's ship," Ava said.

Cooker frowned, "To confirm, Brandon will actually be there tomorrow?"

"He will be," Ava nodded.

Cooker's face gave nothing away to someone who didn't know her. But to Theo, the slight tension in her jaw and her index finger tapping against her thumb on an irregular beat as her hand was hidden behind her crossed arms gave away that Cooker was overwhelmed.

"How is he doing?" Cooker asked, "What is he like, Brandon?"

"He seems a lot more enthused to see you than you are to see him," Ava joked a bit.

"Why would he be happy to see me?" Cooker looked back at Theo and then to Ava. She leaned in and grabbed Ava's upper arm, pulling her close, "He knows?! You fucking told him?"

"No! Of course I didn't tell him," Ava pulled her arm away and Cooker gave her an appropriate distance. Ava adjusted her shirt with a slight huff of displeasure, "I lied for you despite how it's going to make me look tomorrow when he finally confirms it's you. He has been searching for a long time, from what I deduced. He knows it's you even if no one has outright told him."

Cooker left that information unanswered, she stood up and spun around to face Theo. She looked no less overwhelmed than she did a few moments before. Theo needed to make sure she processed in some healthy way so her stress didn't manifest in the wrong ways. Cooker had no intention of slowing down or stopping to allow for that regulation though.

Cooker continued, "So we have until dawn to prepare ourselves with Red's input on the matter and the rest of the sun to continue speaking on it without her."

"We can use Red now that she's here but there won't be a need to stay up all sun, Cook, we need to be rested and have our wits about us tomorrow," Theo shook her head, trying to keep the tone of a lecture to a minimum, "There are also limited matters to strategize on since we have no idea what he wants after we work together on this one mission or the scope of our involvement."

"Fine. But I need to go round everyone up now," Cooker insisted as she walked to the door.

"Great," Theo followed behind as Cooker passed by, "I will come help."

She stopped briefly, turning around with a hand held up stopping Theo, "I can do it. You've only got a limited time with her so enjoy it I suppose."

Without allowing for a response, she left. Theo sighed and looked back at Ava. She didn't need to say anything, Ava just gave a tight nod, understanding that Theo needed to follow. She turned around and exited the room.

"Cook! Hey, can we talk about this?" Theo ran down the stairs.

She caught Cooker at the first of the steps leading away from the second floor. Cooker didn't turn around but she stopped. Theo stepped off the stairs and onto the second floor, looking down at where Cooker was. There was a moment of stillness before Cooker turned around. Theo could tell there were a million routes she wanted to take the conversation and it made her struggle to settle on what to say.

"Swear to me you didn't know, Theo!" Cooker snapped, walking back up the stairs onto the level Theo was on, "swear on Xyra's life that you did not know she was coming and that my brother was going to deliver her to our doorstep."

"I swear," Theo held her hands up, she suspected Cooker was getting worked up less about Ava and more about the stress of the situation, "she's been here not even a few hours."

Cooker once again calmed down a little and scoffed, "You seemed pretty close for not even a few hours. Practically had your tongue down her throat."

Theo laughed, "Cooker, we were at least a foot apart."

"Half a foot."

"We were close, but nothing happened and nothing will happen."

"You can't let yourself go there, T," Cooker shrugged, "I saw her for five minutes and that is all I need to gather that she is not staying here. She's leaving eventually, mate, you cannot get hung up on her again."

"I'm fully aware," Theo nodded.

"You've not been doing a lot of talking yourself out of this one," Cooker tilted her head, "you really had no idea."

"Not even a whiff of an inclination," Theo continued to emphasize just how little she was aware of what was occurring. She and Cooker exchanged a few seconds of silence, just looking into each other's eyes and sizing up each other's emotions.

"Why are you so inclined to trust her? You don't think she's lying?"

Theo shook her head, "She brought Oceane back. They are close, Oceane has been there on the inside with her and she trusts Ava. Why shouldn't we?"

"Oceane is back?"

"She's okay. She's been with Ava most of this time."

There was another pause.

"Whatever. I believe her. And you, I suppose," Cooker shrugged one shoulder and went to make her way down the stairs again, "I'm going to round up the officers, revolution is on our doorstep after all."

"Oi!" Theo followed "I didn't want to talk to you about Red at all. I came after you to ask you how you're feeling."

"Don't know," Cooker kept bounding down the stairs with Theo close behind, she threw up a hand to dismiss the concern, "I feel like my brother who I left half a classification ago is not only looking for me but also is the head of a bloody rebellion. Whatever emotion that is."

"Couldn't tell you," Theo finally caught up to Cooker as they came to the last stair. Cooker's feet were planted on the ground floor as Theo got close enough to put a hand on her shoulder and forced her to turn around, "Stay still and listen to me for a fucking second. Are you going to be alright?"

"Aye," Cooker pulled her shoulder away, "I don't need to be tended to. I'm not some liability. I'll show up and do what needs to get done before tomorrow. And tomorrow, I'll perform how I need to."

"I'm not worried you won't be on your best game," Theo pulled her hand away, retiring it to her side, "You work best under pressure. You know what I'm actually asking."

"Am I going to throw away a half-length streak of not being a major fuck-up?" Cooker clicked her heels together and saluted stiffly, "no worries, Captain, I won't disappoint!"

Theo sighed and shook her head, her shoulders falling a little flat, "Why do you insist on making it seem like I don't care about you? Not your job, or your duties, or what you bring to the table but you. As if we haven't spent our whole lives together looking out for each other. We've even had this exact conversation before."

Cooker didn't answer, she just dropped her salute and stared blankly at Theo.

Theo shook her head, a sadness settling in her chest that happened anytime she saw Cooker act too tough for intervention or care, "You've struggled, Cook. This hasn't been an easy journey for you and I know that. I see how hard you work curbing your impulses and cravings every sun, even if you don't want to speak about it I can still see. I just want to let you know that I am here. If you aren't good, I get that and it's alright."

"Okay," Cooker shrugged it off, "whatever. I've got pirates to take away from a baby, their beds, and liquor. Go back and wait for the officers on the top floor."

Theo didn't say anything, she just watched Cooker cross the room and leave. Why had she even been up there in the first place? Theo cursed her for interrupting her a few seconds too soon.

Or perhaps, it had been right on time. She would have kissed Ava had they not been interrupted and she wasn't sure that was the best idea. It was selfish, especially after what she had done to Ava, but she couldn't allow herself to get hurt again.

Cooker was right, Ava was bound to leave in as little as a few suns from then and no one knew if they were to see each other again. Ava had not been back for an hour and Theo had already settled in with her. Her mind had accepted the familiar feeling and anything further would only prove dangerous. Theo didn't think straight with Ava. Her emotions were always at the forefront.

But Theo was irrevocably in love with her.

Which shouldn't have come as a shock to her but it was a fact she had been avoiding for far too long. Almost a length apart and her desire was still strong. Ava hadn't changed; the core of her was still the same. Curious, passionate, incessant in her search for answers, and relished in making people uncomfortable. Although, Theo didn't think Ava would readily admit that last part. She took the stairs back up, two at a time to get back up to her faster.

They only had a limited time left alone.

As she crossed into the third floor, she saw Ava circling the main table in the room. The large, round wooden one that hosted all of their mail and whatever other projects had been abandoned earlier in the sun. Ava was not being subtle with her interest in the various pieces on the table, eyes darting around to read the names on the envelopes.

"I don't have the best experiences with spies," Theo made her presence known as she walked toward the table, "So, what am I to think when I catch you snooping around crew matters? Are you a spy?"

"Yes. And I am an awful operative," Ava teased, "my insatiable curiosity foils me again. This wasn't even my mission."

"Then what was it?"

"To steal all your gold," Ava admitted, "pirate the pirate was my directive. Any chance you can point me to your treasury?"

"Of course, let me just draw you a map that will lead you right to it," Theo laughed as she stood in front of Ava, both hands in her pockets, "I'm sorry about all of that from Cooker. You know she can be a bit of a personality."

"That's alright, Cooker is Cooker. I would have been insulted if her frenetic energy wasn't what I was met with," Ava smiled, and picked up a letter, scanning it. Theo allowed her.

She placed it down and took another look around the room, soaking it all in now that they had untangled themselves from the high of each other's presence. Cooker's entrance had been sobering. Ava turned back around after her inspection of the room and cleared her throat.

"I'm sorry about earlier. I pushed. A lot. It was the smoking and the moment," Ava paused and took a deep breath, "and you."

"An apology and a push in the same sentence. Interesting."

"That wasn't a push. It was an admission," Ava shrugged, "you had a few of your own and I never told you how I felt."

"Red," Theo stopped her, "you really shouldn't. We really shouldn't."

"You are probably right," Ava smiled but Theo could tell there was so much to say on her face, "people will be coming soon and it isn't the time."

It would never be the time. Theo couldn't ever hear Ava say anything remotely romantic or all hopes of getting over her would be lost forever. Theo was going to follow up with a request for nothing to be said, ever.

Except Morgana had another idea.

"My skinny friend!" her voice boomed from the stairs, "Where are you?"

Ava laughed and when she did, her eyes shut from how wide she was smiling. A look of genuine elation was on her face as she began to walk toward the door. Morgana bounded up the last of the stairs and ran across the threshold, picking Ava up in her arms and spinning her around when they collided.

"Mor! I missed you so much!" Ava laughed and kicked her legs in the air.

She was put down eventually but their hug didn't end. Tuni had really changed Morgana, she would have killed anyone for getting in her space when the crew first started. Theo left them to their small reunion, allowing them space to catch up. She looked toward the door trying to guess who would come next. Only a limited number of them were left, so not many officers would be in attendance. Gianna was in the infirmary with a newborn, Tuni and Navi had been long gone; Xyra and Iona had since joined them on the island.

She had guessed the next person to come in would be Kaia but she was wrong. Skins entered the room and the same, sweet reuniting occurred between the two. A hug was exchanged and Theo could see the genuine love they had for each other. Ava had embedded herself into the lives of everyone, Skins had been no exception. They had been friends since the very first sun Ava had attempted to find a job. Theo remembered her time in carpentry and Ava's suggestion for Skins to be quartermaster at one point.

Skins pulled away from Ava and Theo allowed herself to listen, only because they had gotten so close to her.

"Missed you Skins," Ava laughed as she looked her friend up and down, a hand on their shoulder, "I cannot believe you are an officer. You always swore it wouldn't happen."

"Thanks to you, it happened."

"Thanks to me?"

"I thought, if the carpentry prodigy can do it, how hard could it be?" Skins teased.

"Dick!" Ava said with a hearty laugh, emerging from her belly.

"It was about time Theo had an omkei as an officer too, couldn't continue to let that slide."

Theo laughed and injected herself into the conversation, "Come off it, Skins. We've had this discussion before."

"Who knew our captain was a bigot? I sure didn't. It's such a shame," Skins ignored Theo with a dramatic sigh.

Ava laughed and looked over to her with a raised eyebrow, "Care to answer these accusations?"

"I have run this crew for almost five lengths. I have had many different kinds of people in my officer ranks, including omkeis. At one point, there were even three at once."

"And now you're keeping score," Skins sighed, "I am just a number on your tally so you can brag about how understanding and accepting you are."

"Aye, and if you have a problem with it, take it up with a pen at Fingen's," Theo gave in to the teasing. Skins was too similar to Cooker and neither of them could be pulled away from messing around even if they had been offered endless riches.

Ava laughed at Skins imitating the use of a quill on paper. Theo watched as Ava's eyes trailed to the doorway mid laugh, and it became caught in her throat. Theo followed her eyes to find Kaia walking in.

Kaia's eyes landed on them as she was scanning the room and Theo waved her over to them. She took a few long strides over and stood in front of the small group that had formed.

"Red, this is one of our newest officers, Lee'Kaia. She's been with us since we left for Corinspe and she gave up a pretty lucrative career to come help us out," Theo motioned to Kaia and then back to Ava, "Kaia, this is Red."

"Oh, I know who you are," Kaia said and extended her hand for Ava, who took it. They shook hands and Kaia pulled hers away, turning to look at Theo, "Captain, may we have a moment?"

Ava narrowed her eyes at the exchange, most likely feeling affronted. Kaia had been pointed and purposeful with her energy. Theo nodded, accepting Kaia's request, knowing that she needed to give her assurances to quite a few people that this wasn't an elaborate plan to get Ava back.

Theo pulled her into the only other room on the floor, one she and Kaia had experienced many serious conversations in. As soon as she closed the door behind them, Kaia jumped into it.

"Cooker said you had no idea she was coming and that you swear that on Xyra's life," Kaia crossed her arms and she wondered how she had ended up with not only two Cookers in her inner circle but two Xyra's as well. Obviously, she knew they were fundamentally different but they made Theo feel the same, forced her to be accountable, and asked the tough questions.

To her misfortune.

"All of this is as new to me as it is to you," Theo also crossed her arms, feeling defensive over her lack of involvement, "She came to recruit me for the revolution and to share some information everyone will be privy to soon."

Kaia nodded, "Alright."

"You don't believe me?" Theo tried to decipher the tone.

"I do," Kaia uncrossed her arms and shook her head, letting her hands come to her hips as they rested there, "I don't believe her. But you seem to."

"I do. She's not lying about why she's here or what information she has," Theo said and Kaia didn't look convinced, "Kaia, I know she's not lying. I know she's telling the truth."

"You didn't know before. She lied to you for a length and you had no idea," she pointed out and Theo could understand why her assurances were questioned.

It frustrated her.

"This is getting tired, Kaia. No, I didn't know she was lying to me before but the only thing she ever misguided me on was her last name. Everything else she ever did was always honest and with a good heart."

"And that can't be an act? If she was lying, that would be the perfect way to trick you. You are pointing to the exact reason you should be careful!" Kaia also seemed frustrated, like she was at the end of her wits over Theo not seeing or understanding what she was seeing.

"She saved Oceane, kept her safe, and brought her back here. That alone should be proof she means well," Theo argued, "it isn't an act."

"That changes nothing, Captain. Again, that is exactly what she would want you to think if she was not well-intentioned," Kaia tried to make her point again. Theo, for the first time, experienced what they said about the great Lee'Kaia.

She was intense but worth it; that was what people said about her. She could see scenarios no one could predict. If no one knew what to do about a situation, she did. She took nothing at face value and nothing for granted. She thought of and worked through all possibilities. But this time, Kaia was wrong and Theo was fully confident on that. All of her successes did not mean she couldn't be mistaken and Kaia could not see that.

"I know her. Question that all you like, but I know she is being honest," Theo said sternly, in a harsh whisper so the others wouldn't hear. Being conscious of her volume for the first time since entering, "I am your Captain and this is my choice to hear her out and host her."

"Fine."

Theo was not satisfied with that answer, "Your issue with her is illogical, she did not even affect you. People she hurt are in there hugging her and rejoicing her return and you– who has had no interactions with her besides this moment– are ready to toss her and her information aside. I don't get how that doesn't clue you in that she is genuine, Kai."

"She affected you for a long fucking time, Theo, I saw it with my own eyes. I might not have been there when she lied, but I was there for the aftermath. And as someone who was brought on to advise you, I should tell you that I do not think this is a good idea. And I am not talking about hearing her out or working with her for the revolution I am talking about you and her on a deeper level."

Two concerned conversations in less than a half hour about the same thing. Two of her most trusted officers had confronted her on the same matter; do not get close to Ava. Was she that obvious? Was her yearning and abject desire for Ava so noticeable that even after all of what Ava did to her and even after all that time, two of her close mates had said the exact same thing about protecting her heart?

But her desire for Ava was not what had caused her slump earlier in that length.

"Kaia, my state after she was gone was not because of her, it was because of me and what I had done," Theo said and Kaia's face was unchanged, unconvinced. But just for a moment

Kaia relaxed her shoulders, her arms uncrossing as she let out a small sigh. It wasn't disappointment, or anger. Slight concern, a little bit of care, and some defeat. Kaia's eyes had gone from a hardened stare and a straight mouth to a more empathetic– and slightly pity-filled- frown.

"At the center of it all you were hurting that she was gone and there was no feasible path back to her. Do not deny that," Kaia called her out and Theo could not deny it even if she wanted to, "She is the heir to the Vaith household, she's not going to be staying here with us– that would be an awful strategic move on her end if she does mean well with her power. If you get tangled up in her again, you are going to have to pick up the pieces when she's gone."

Kaia became more gentle in her approach but Theo only grew increasingly more defensive and upset. There was actually no reason that she should have been confronted aggressively, two times, about her relationship– or lack thereof. Which was none of anyone's concern.

"I don't know why this has become some kind of lecture about my love life. She is here for a reason and that is not to fuck around with me," Theo rebuttalled, but it was a lie. An hour with Ava proved they were on the same page and one step in that direction would mean they would wind up tangled together– as Kaia put it.

"Cooker said you were awfully close when she walked in," Kaia immediately called her bluff.

Damn Cooker and damn Kaia. She should have known better than to hire yet another exacting, hyper-aware, unnaturally capable person. At least before, when Xyra was gone, she had a bit of a break to be an unthinking Captain.

"Cooker is a fucking snitch. Aye, we were close, but I had no intention of letting it progress. We were caught up in a moment but the moment would have ended before it was too late," Theo assured but again, it was almost a lie. She wasn't positive she wouldn't have given in, "and I didn't bring you on this ship for your advice. You joined as a crew member. Even now, you take on the role of first mate well and you are looked to for your opinions on ship matters. This is not a ship matter. I do not need your advice."

"We've been over this. As Captain, if it affects you it affects the ship."

Theo let the tension release and allowed her guard to come down for a moment to think through how to get through the obstacle in front of her. Theo had to be a captain. She had to prove that Ava did not affect her judgment. She needed to listen to her crew members even if they had concerns she didn't share. She needed to make everyone feel heard and feel like they could approach her. She wouldn't make the same mistakes again. The defensiveness that rose up in her when Ava was mentioned had to be tampered down. Instead of going back and forth, she nodded.

"I understand that. And I understand your worries. Your advice and Cooker's has already been taken into consideration," Theo acknowledged with a nod.

Kaia tilted her head a bit and gave Theo a once over. She stared for a few beats before shaking her head with a hint of a laugh, "You aren't going to listen to us."

Theo cracked a small smile, "I will do my best."

"Is one night worth a length of heartache?"

"If it's a night with her, aye, I think it would be worth a lifetime of heartache," Theo admitted and Kaia sighed, "apologies if that's not what you wanted to hear."

"I rather you be honest," Kaia allowed a small smile to slip through, returning Theo's, "I'm sorry."

"For?"

"How in love you are," she pushed herself off the wall, "I know what it feels like and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy."

Kaia let out a soft laugh and walked out of the room. Theo took a second to herself and sat for a moment, putting her head in her hands. It was true. What Cooker and Kaia had failed to consider was that she was already in deep shit. She was so beyond fucked. Even then, even if Ava left right at that moment she would be all Theo thought about for cycles on end. Theo had done a good job of pushing her feelings away but now that Ava was back and all of her actions at Aubermasse could be explained away, any suppression of her feelings had faded.

And it would be hard to get through the next interaction without Ava being the only thing on her mind. The discussion they were entering was serious, pertaining to information that could help change the trajectory of their entire world and all she could think about was Avery fucking Vaith.

—----------------------------------------------------

When the morning had started, Cooker had thought the rest the sun would go the way most others had. It seemed like a fairly normal morning. She woke up in Agnes' bed, she had taken Maise to school, she had checked in on some shops, and had picked up their mail and returned it to Marian's before the first hour of the aftermorning.

Her evening, however, had much more in store for her: a newborn, the return of an exiled crew member, the revolution at their doorstep, and the revelation that their entire social and political fabric was being manipulated by people who never gave up the power as they had claimed to.

Ava's revelation went over well with most everyone. No one was skeptical of the information, they all took it to be the truth. Which Ava was surprised by. Cooker took time to explain that it was just one of many theories that people held about the true nature of Baethos.

"The whole seven people rule the world thing is a little shocking. The Ten Generals never giving up power and continuing as nobles, many people hold that to be true. And the fact that the classification system is a farce? That is almost an accepted fact at this point. There has never been any rhyme or reason to it."

The only one that was somewhat shocked was Morgana, who had always been a conspiracy naysayer. Xyra had also always doubted Cooker and Theo's conviction at the fact that there was someone behind the scenes manipulating the reclassification that no one knew about but Xyra wasn't there so Cooker couldn't rub it in. Besides Morgana's exaggerated surprise when they found out, the only other reaction was endless questions for Ava on what she had learned. But even her information was limited, she needed to go back to understand more.

There was a lot up in the air but the one thing that was clear was that revolution was coming, and the rebellion wanted the crew's help as it prepared to launch an insurgency. The second thing that was clear– and perhaps the only other item with some clarity– was that the mission of the Scorned Woman was to do everything in their power to bring down the seven nobles running Baethos. Their ticket to doing that was the rebellion.

After Ava debriefed them on what she knew, most of their conversation was not so much strategizing as it was hypotheticals and debating them. They really couldn't tell what was happening until the meeting. Eventually, business turned to pleasure, and questions about the revolution turned into questions being lobbed between the officers and Ava about the time apart.

Cooker couldn't find it in her to engage. She was withdrawn and she knew Theo had noticed. Her chest felt taught and her stomach felt like it was going to fall out of her. Cooker knew what anxiety felt like. She knew the waves of chills that would jolt down her body at random moments were from her stress but she could do nothing to make them stop.

She wasn't good at handling too many emotions at once and fuck were there too many emotions for her. The truth was she was terrified. Revolution was something she had always seen in her future but now that it was there, she couldn't wrap her head around it. There was so much that could go wrong and at that point in her life, she had a lot to lose. She was scared. Maybe she could have handled just being scared.

But it wasn't just that. It was self-doubt, it was dread about seeing her brother, it was nerves about the unknown, it was so much that she couldn't even pinpoint the feelings that were buzzing at the back of her head.

And she knew how to stop it. She knew what she needed but she couldn't do that.

Cooker had picked her thumb raw. Her pointer finger had come down to chip away at the skin around her nail. Even though it was tender and sensitive and each swipe of her finger against her thumb sent a small bolt of pain down her arm, it was good. It made her feel slightly better, she could feel her body relax. It was at least enough to stay present, to tune out her inner self begging for a drink.

She decided to distract herself by observing Ava. Which was a bad idea because all it did was show her that she and Theo were beyond saving. The way that Theo smiled or laughed every time Ava did was an indication of how drunk they were off each other's presence. She hadn't ever seen Theo like that with anyone; even with Viv there was a little bit of reservation in Theo to wear her emotions so openly on her face.

With Ava, it didn't seem like there was a choice. The fucker had the Captain Theo smitten with her. It was far from one-sided though. The way that Ava looked at Theo when she spoke was dripping with longing and love. They bounced well off each other in a serious setting too. Ava had been given the floor and command of a lot of the conversation and as Captain, Theo was naturally looked to as the one to engage Ava in follow up questions or back and forth.

And Ava handled it well. Still, Cooker felt irritated with her and she didn't know why she was so upset. Logically, she knew the policies and reforms Lord Vaith had passed under her advice were the best she could do and in reality, it would help at least a bit but it was hard to remove herself from Ava being the enemy. Cooker was always at Fingen's crafting essays with words that lacerated the victim, and lately, the victim of her lacerations had been the one and only Avery Vaith.

It was hard to remember that Cooker had been attacking what she represented and not her.

There was a time when Cooker liked Ava, tried to advise and protect her, and helped her navigate the library that taught her a lot of what she now knew. But it had since changed and the slight tension that had been surrounding them since their first time at Corinpse when Cooker had found out they were sleeping together hadn't ever dissipated. It was easier to be angry with Ava than it was to admit her role in all of it. Cooker was the one that started them on their road to the downfall they would all eventually experience and that thought made her throat dry.

She needed to make an effort to repair that relationship at some point but there wouldn't be a good time for it to happen. Ava was bound to leave within a few suns. Even if she didn't want to make amends, she would be forced to. Ava had managed to sway everyone to her side, including Kaia– who was her only ally in mounting a defense against Ava until she was recruited by the very evil she had once hoped to defeat.

Cooker played with the wood on the arm of her chair, looking out with a frown. There was no choice but to watch the scene in front of her. She had been watching Oceane and Fjord catch up but it had become dull. Instead, she was forced to watch the very two people she was cross with. Ava and Kaia were speaking to each other but Cooker could catch none of what they were saying. They were slightly too far away. Morgana was making herself part of that conversation too, occasionally piping up with something to add.

Cooker didn't think it was anything too serious until Skins also joined from outside of the conversation.

"I think they'll have us take the tunnels!" Skins chimed in, sitting at the table that was halfway between the distance of Cooker and the noble girl.

They were discussing strategy? Without her?

And to think she was going to let herself come around to Ava once again.

Theo peered over from her conversation with Skins, which had been interrupted by that very same person.

"The Mithren own the tunnels. We have never had access before and I certainly don't think that will change now," Theo replied to the speculation and Skins rolled their eyes.

"They can suck my balls, honestly," Skins shot back. Cooker felt the same way that Skins did, her whole life she had just wanted to use the tunnels at least once.

"Are you upset because we are living under their rules and regulations or because they won't let us use the tunnels?" Theo clarified with a laugh.

"Tunnels," Skins laughed too.

Ava spoke up, loud enough for Cooker to hear from her positions clear across the room, "I'm not sure how you all will get to the meeting but it must have already been thought through because Brandon didn't seem worried. Why are the tunnels off limits though?"

"Generally, no one but the Mithren and their collaborators have access to the tunnels," Theo explained, a smile crossing her face as she spoke and locked eyes with Ava. Cooker wanted to roll her eyes at the exchange but she remained neutral as Theo continued, "In the past, I never had a use for the tunnels or an existing relationship with them so we never gained access.. Now, we aren't on the best of terms with them. The only reason we haven't been run off this island is because of the money we have brought into Nivealan businesses."

Theo had summarized a cycles long conflict quite well but missed crucial details. Cooker hopped in for her.

"You are making it seem like we were at fault. One of the Mithren's daughters tried to force you into fucking her and when that didn't work out, she harassed our businesses. Then, you exposed her to her father for ordering a hit on her brother too many lengths ago to count in order to knock her from power but in doing so, you exposed yourself as being the one to carry out the hit. So, we are barely tolerated here and we will be lucky if we ever get to step foot in Niveal again once we leave."

"Wait a fucking second!" Morgana snapped her head over to where Cooker had spoken up, "You're telling me we can't come back here?"

"We aren't sure," Theo clarified and held out her hands trying to calm the bewildered reaction that came from most in the room. She shot Cooker a dirty look at bringing up a reality that not many had caught onto yet, "can't be sure until we leave and attempt to get back in. We didn't exactly discuss details last time I spoke to the Purple Mithren."

"Well, why not? Seems important," Morgana said.

"Does seem important, Cap," Skins backed her up.

"Because he was being told that Theo killed his only son," Cooker elaborated with a shake of her head, "obviously."

Throughout the back and forth, Cooker noticed how quiet Ava had become.

"Oi, Lady Vaith," Cooker called out with a jut of her chin in that direction, "what are you thinking about?"

Ava frowned as she crossed her arms, "Sometimes, you pirates like to throw out information faster than people can process."

"Hm, thought you would be upset because someone tried to put their hands on your precious Captain," Cooker taunted her, and she wasn't really in control of her tongue.

It was like her brain wanted something to satisfy it and if it wasn't loli it it had to be something else and it had chosen to be an antagonist.

"If I am upset, it is because Theo was almost assaulted by someone and not because of any other reason, Cooker," Ava scoffed a bit, "but it's nice to see you still are using any means necessary to try and prove a point. Including using a friend's trauma."

"And nice to see you've learned from Viv that tongues can bite just as hard as teeth," Cooker challenged with her own veiled compliment, "being able to hold your own is new for you, glad you've moved on from being helpless."

"That's enough!" Theo stood up from her chair and walked to the midpoint between the two of them, blocking each other's eyeline. Theo looked at Cooker with a disappointed expression and her mouth in a slight downturn, "I think maybe it's time everyone headed to bed."

Cooker was going to say something but Kaia stood up from her seat.

"It's going to be dawn soon. Our guests should get going and everyone should be going back to the inn. You heard Theo, everyone to bed," Kaia crossed her arms, looking straight at Cooker.

How quickly allies could turn on someone.

Cooker stood up dramatically, letting the chair fall as she did, "I'm going to make sure downstairs is ready to open up for business in the morning."

"Cooker, come on mate, stay and say bye to Red," Skins tried to reason with her but she just walked past them all and headed downstairs.

She began to arrange the furniture to accept visitors from around town. It was the way that Theo preferred to have it set up. Tables off in a corner, chairs for people waiting, a chair and table for Theo, and another one for the note keeper.

She tried to keep her mind on her task instead of wandering. Which proved futile because all she could do was think about her attitude. It really didn't represent her true feelings but she wanted to poke and prod. She knew it made her look like a dick. She knew Theo would be upset. She knew that people would talk about it but she couldn't help it. The drugs had gone away and she still managed to find a way to self-sabotage.

She had been able to manage her impulses and the worst of her attitude because nothing was pressing down on her. But with everything that had changed that sun alone, she didn't know if she could keep it up. It was only a matter of time before she slipped up, before she fell down the same hole again. Which, to again clarify, was never that deep to begin with. It helped her work faster but that's about all loli did.

When Xyra had forced everyone to confront her about whatever problem they told her she had, people kept listing ways that everything affected her but really, all their complaints were just a reflection of her personality, not the drugs.

But that wasn't true. She knew that. Cooker understood why Xyra and Theo had made her give it all up. She needed to stop spiraling down untruths.

Cooker stepped behind the bar to clean it up. Theo and Ava must have been down there earlier because there were drinks and bottles laid out on the bartop. Cooker paused, looking at the almost full bottle of malt in front of her. It was hard to swallow and even harder to break the trance she had fallen into. Her breathing slowed down but her heartbeat felt quicker.

It was all for a reason. She had a family. She had promised Theo and Xyra she would at least talk it through with them before taking or drinking anything she wasn't supposed to. She had made a commitment to herself. But fuck commitment. Fuck promises. Nothing would happen and no one would know if she took a sip.

It was a loop that would keep going, she knew herself. What she didn't know was how many times she could be thrown around the loop before giving in.

"I'll be sure to ask about it tomorrow but you have to clear it with Cooker first," a voice came down the stairs, Kaia.

Cooker snapped back into action. She put the bottle away and began to clear up the bar like she had originally intended. Before long, she had Skins in front of her. Kaia was saying her goodbyes as she left through the front doors.

Cooker looked up, "You needed my approval for something?"

"Since when were you the keeper of our coin," Skins asked.

"Since Miss Yurwa left with Rose to the island," Cooker shook her head as she finished wiping the bar with a dry towel, "cycles ago, Skins, you really need to know this stuff if you are an officer."

Skins laughed and shrugged a shoulder as they peered over the bar to check Cooker's progress, "I need to get Titan sets for the journey to the island. Kaia knows how to get really nice ones for really cheap. Says I need to get your financial sign off or something."

"Why do you need multiple of them?" Cooker asked and nodded Morgana's way as she said her goodbyes while leaving.

"For the crew. So we can play."

"Do you know how to play?"

Skins shook their head.

"Do you know anyone that knows how to?"

"Sure I do, I'm looking right at 'em," Skins chuckled, "figured you could teach me and the rest of the lower deck crew and then we could all play Titan."

"No."

"Cooker, we have so much fucking money and we are going to get so bored during our trip to Aeliz."

"Fine," Cooker rolled her eyes with a slight laugh, "let Kaia go get you your fucking Titan sets."

Skins slapped the bar, "You are great. Please be in charge of our money forever."

Cooker laughed at that, feeling a bit better than before, and she hoped that was the end of the conversation. But Skins talked too much. They stopped before walking off too far and added.

"You know. Next time you see Red, you really owe her an apology," Skins said, "you were a dick. For, like, no reason at all."

"Got it. Thanks for the input," Cooker said and raised her middle finger at them as they left, returning the same gesture.

Cooker rolled her eyes and sighed once she was alone. Maybe if Skins had left one sentence before, her mood wouldn't have come crashing back to where it was prior to Skins coming to ask for help. Thankfully, she wasn't alone for long. Theo, Ava, Oceane, and Fjord came down the stairs. Cooker ducked behind the bar as the other crossed into the room, heading toward the back alley.

She avoided them and slipped into Theo's office on the first floor once they were out of sight. It was a mess in there too. Granted, that was Kaia's fault. She was the one that used it the most yet never felt the need to organize after she was done. It's because she worked for Captains all her life and just had cabinboys doing her bidding.

Cooker didn't actually know if that was true or not. She just had a superfluous need to be bitter at that moment. She cleaned as she heard indistinguishable chatter outside. Then, there was silence. Cooker stopped her cleaning, making sure not to alert Theo that she was in there. The door was open and any noise would tip off the captain.

Footsteps began to get closer and then farther as Theo walked up the stairs. Cooker let out a deep breath and cleared her throat, straightening her back and getting back to organizing. There wasn't a lot to do other than straightening up papers so perhaps she had judged Kaia too harshly and too quickly.

But once again, fate tempted her.

There was a discarded drink. Half empty, clear liquor. She could smell it from there. It was just a sip and she could taste it, she could feel it burn down her throat. Without thinking, she grabbed it.

It crashed against the wall as she threw it. She let out a frustrated noise as she kicked the table in front of her.

"Fuck!" Cooker bent down to grab her toes through her shoes.

She turned around to walk off the pain but she was met with the one person she didn't want to see.

Theo was at the entrance of the room, looking at the scene that had unfolded in front of her.

"Cook..."

"I'm fucking fine, Theo!" Cooker walked toward the door, "stop looking at me like that."

"Where are you going?" Theo followed, "you didn't want to talk through this some more?"

"You said it yourself, after dawn, it is time to rest. I'm going to Agnes' place. I will meet you back here later and by then you should know the details of the meeting."

Cooker knew that Theo wanted to tell her stay or follow but she was left alone. Which others would have seen as irresponsible but Theo knew it was her only choice. Following Cooker would rile her up more and push her to do the opposite of what was needed of her. Cooker knew Theo understood that and took full advantage. If Theo thought Cooker was lying about where she was going, she didn't show it.

She felt bad that even with her attitude Theo met her with some form of compassion and care. She didn't let her brain catch up to her actions. She forced her feet to move under her, taking her to the back alleys of Stumbler's Row. Once she came upon the fence that divided Stumbler's row from the residential area of town, she climbed it.

Her feet landed in the soft grass and a familiar backyard. Cooker would need to leave some gold with Agnes to pay off her landlord. The fence was still off-limits for traveling between the two sections of the island but Cooker continued to ignore that rule. She would have rather faced the fines than go all the way around.

She was walking toward the back entrance of the house when she heard screaming coming from inside. Her stomach sank and her heart stopped, she rushed forward and threw the door open trying to figure out what was happening and how to help. Inside was not a murderous man trying to kill her family or a crazed assassin looking for revenge.

Inside was a screeching child, a crying toddler, and a very frazzled mother.

Maise was on the floor, kicking her legs into the ground as she thrashed around and wailed. There were unintelligible words of protest flying out of her mouth. Agnes turned to see who had walked in and she looked like she was drowning. Her eyes were pleading for help and Cooker sprinted into action. She walked over and took Florence from Agnes' arms. The small girl was crying and soon there was a tiny head buried in her neck.

Cooker rubbed a soothing hand over the girl's back, making sure to bounce a bit as she swayed side to side. It was helping just a bit and Cooker looked down to see her crying face begin to relax. Her attention was pulled back to the others in the room when Agnes' let out a frustrated grunt.

She had since sat on the floor, next to Maise and was trying to get her to calm down. But it wasn't working. Everytime Agnes would try and sit Maise up or try and grab her hands to help her ground herself, kicking and wiggling would prevent her from it. Agnes looked like she was going to break.

"Maise, please!" Agnes pleaded and finally managed to get a light hold on her hands and forearms. She pulled up the screaming child to be standing and facing her. Agnes locked her in place by placing her hands firmly on her daughters hips and trying to meet her gaze, "baby, can we use our words to talk through what you are feeling?"

"I want to go back! I want my dad! I hate you! I hate you," Maise somehow screamed the second one louder.

Cooker frowned and stepped forward, still rubbing soothing circles on Florence's back, "Maise, sweetheart, you never act like this. Where is it coming from?"

Maise crossed her arms and the world's most intense pout settled on her face. She was not budging and in the slight bit of calm that had emerged, Agnes was able to look at Cooker for more than two seconds.

She shrugged her shoulders and the hurt was clear on her face, in her body language, and in her tone, "She woke up from a nightmare and started asking me for him. I told her what I've told her every time and then this happened."

Agnes was far too kind with her words about their father. Cooker placed Florence down and motioned to Maise, asking to get a shot at it. She probably would make no more progress than Agnes had but she needed to at least try. Agnes got up and took Florence away as Cooker sat down in front of Maise, who had yet to move from her angered position.

"Mais, remember what mum told you before?" Cooker tried to reason with her, "your dad got really sick. He's not here anymore and because of that, your mum and your Aunt Belle brought you here where you could be safe and be taken care of."

"Liar. He is looking for me and mummy is keeping him away! I saw him!"

"Maise, that was a dream, sweets. Sometimes they can feel really real and that can be scary. I am sure seeing your dad made you sad and you can let out that emotion but you can't hurt others with your words like you are doing," Cooker was trying to hold her in place like Agnes had done. It had worked well until Cooker finished giving advice to a child that could not be reasoned with.

"I hate you. You aren't my dad!" Maise pushed and kicked until she was let go and then ran into her room and slammed the door shut.

Cooker watched her leave and let out a deep sigh at the failure. She stood up and faced Agnes who looked to be trying very hard to keep it together. Cooker walked over and put a hand on the back of her head, leaning forward and placing a kiss on the side of Agnes' head.

"She's been hearing about fathers a lot in school. With the reclassification rolling around, everyone is talking about what their dad is doing and I guess it found its way into her dreams."

"How long have you all been up?" Cooker asked.

"She's been at this tantrum for an hour," Agnes' shoulders relaxed as Cooker took Florence back into her arms, giving Agnes a break, "I thought it would never end."

"I'm sorry," Cooker said, "Why don't you go see if you can talk to her once she's calmed down? I can put Flo to sleep in your bed."

"Are you sure?"

"Sleeping baby versus having to calm down a growing child who has learned to use her words for evil," Cooker pretended to weigh her options by tilting her head side to side, "I think I'll take the sleeping baby."

Agnes smiled the slightest bit and Cooker counted it as a win. She leaned forward once again and this time placed a light peck to her lips then left the room. She headed to Agnes' bed and laid down, Florence quickly falling asleep on her chest. It had been a long sun and she found herself dozing off too.

Her eyes opened and she glanced around, she had definitely fallen asleep but it was still dark out which means not too much time had passed. Florence was still sleeping in her arms and Cooker was careful to set her down properly so as to not wake her when she got up. She was successful and the small figure stayed peacefully sleeping on the bed while Cooker slipped out of the room.

Cooker crossed the hall and stood in the open door of Maise and Florence's room. Maise was asleep, nestling up against her mother's side as Agnes brushed soothing fingers through her hair. Cooker leaned against the doorframe and the noise of her arrival caused Agnes to look up. They smiled at each other but Agnes' didn't reach her cheeks.

"She's out?"

Agnes nodded, "Didn't take long. She wore herself out."

Cooker walked over, sitting on the edge of the bed next to the cuddled pair. She placed a hand over Agnes' thigh and rubbed her hand over it as she looked at the uncovered half of Maise's face. The only evidence of a tantrum being the red nose on her angelic, sleeping face. Cooker found herself frowning as the worst of her thoughts came to her.

You shouldn't have gotten involved with them. You are right back where you were a length ago and now you're going to drag them into it. You heard her, you are not her father. You are not her parent. You can walk away. You should walk away. So that when you eventually fuck up you can't hurt any of them.

"She loves you, you know that? I'm so sorry she said that," Agnes said as she slipped a hand over Cooker's cheek.

The turmoil must have been clear on her face. She wiped it off, replacing it with a smile and a shake of her head. She took the hand on her cheek and pulled it off, placing a kiss on it instead.

"I was a kid once and said some hurtful shit. Don't think about it a second longer," Cooker gave Agnes her hand back, "let me help you set her down."

Together, they helped Maise under the covers. Once they had confirmed she was settled and wouldn't wake up, they tiptoed out of the room. Agnes shut the door behind her. She stopped for a second and let out a sigh as she looked at Cooker. She was going to say something but stopped herself.

She held two fingers between her brows and pressed down. Cooker wasn't sure what was happening until she heard Agnes' sharp intake of breath and then saw her shoulders shake. She had started to cry and Cooker took her into her arms, hugging her tightly.

It must not have been easy to hear Maise say what she had. If it had hurt Cooker, she couldn't imagine how Agnes felt. Cooker let everything else go for a moment. The struggle to keep a handle on her cravings had been tossed to the side in favor of being with the person that needed her and the person she wanted to be there for. Her heart felt full and she would have rather been there, comforting Agnes, than anywhere else in the world.

Once Agnes had recovered from her initial volley of emotions, Cooker pulled away and guided her to the kitchen, sitting her down at the table before walking to light a fire under the stove. She had a kettle boiling before long and sat down in front of Agnes. Agnes rolled her shoulders and then stretched her neck. She shook her head with a slight laugh and stretched out her hand for Cooker. Cooker took it and squeezed it, also laughing even though there was nothing funny.

"What have I dragged you into?"

"The girls can't always be perfect, my love," Cooker shrugged a bit, "suns like this are going to happen. I made a choice to enter your lives, through the good and bad."

"You are a better parent than their father ever was."

"You didn't have to tell me that, I knew," Cooker smirked a bit, "I've never been compared to a man and fallen short."

Agnes rolled her eyes but squeezed Cooker's hand back, "You are a better partner than he ever was too."

"Hey, I've still got time to fuck that up. Don't count me out just yet," Cooker teased.

Agnes let her hand go, "You know I hate that."

"I do know. I like to bother you," Cooker put her feet up and draped them across Agnes' lap.

"Where have you been all night?" Agnes raised an eyebrow as she took one of Cooker's feet and drove her thumbs into the arch of her soles, "last you told me, you would be right home after hanging back with the new baby for a bit."

"Got a bit caught up with some life-altering information," Cooker groaned as she gripped the table, feeling the relief of soreness in her feet, "Red's back in town."

"Red? Like, Lady Avery Vaith?" Agnes gasped in shock when Cooker nodded, "She's a massive deal now. She's got power. Why is she back?"

"I'll let you guess."

"She ran away again?"

"Nope."

Agnes stopped massaging Cooker's foot, "Just tell me or I withhold all massages for the foreseeable future."

"Conniving woman," Cooker joked but really she was just trying to avoid having to once again face what was breathing down their necks, "she came to convince us to take a meeting with my brother, the leader of the revolution."

"Where is this meeting you would take with him?"

"Here. Tomorrow. Not sure where on the island though."

The massage she threatened to withhold was withheld anyway as more attention was being paid to the revelation than to her feet.

"Here?! Tomorrow?!" Agnes stood up and went to the kettle, checking it even though it wasn't needed, "and this meeting is with your brother? He is here. Physically."

"I haven't seen him but I don't know why Red would lie, so aye, he is here physically," Cooker stood up and walked behind Agnes, arms wrapping around her waist, "and he wants to meet with us to give us a mission, a test run to see if we are rebellion material."

"A mission. A dangerous mission?" Agnes glanced back.

"Prison break from a prison we've already escaped from," Cooker said, "should be fairly straightforward."

"You seem pretty calm at the fact that your brother is on this island with you," Agnes noted as she slipped her arms over Cooker's.

"I've known it's been coming since I found out he was the one running shit. Might as well get it over with," Cooker untangled herself when the kettle was ready and took it off take off the stove, "he knows I am who I am and he is going to want to get some time in with his long lost sister and I'm going to make him upset when I don't want anything to do with him and it's just something I need to get done already."

"Why do you insist on turning him away? Wouldn't you want to know him a little better? At least connect with someone from your past?" Agnes asked and this time, she was the one that wrapped her arms around Cooker's waist.

"I have no interest. I was a child when I left. He knows nothing about me now. We share nothing in common," Cooker said as she poured them two mugs of tea.

"You have the revolution in common."

"I'm not sure that is the best thing to bond over," Cooker teased as she turned around and handed Agnes her mug.

They enjoyed a familiar banter and flirting the rest of the time they were awake. After tea, they cozied up on a lounging couch. The both of them wrapped up in a large wool blanket. Eventually, Agnes fell asleep. Despite having been up all night, the sun that was peeking through the windows was telling her it wasn't time to rest.

She tried to close her eyes and fall asleep but the thoughts of her actions that night and what was to come taunted her yet again. She didn't let herself think of that and as her mind shifted, it went down the wrong path. Within minutes, the cravings had returned– they had hit her hard. She felt empty, voracious, unrelenting in her need for something to satisfy her. The only thing that could do that was a nice, large drink or a small bit of loli.

Cooker carefully got up from the couch. As she stood up and readjusted the blanket over Agnes, an eye peeked open at her.

"Hm?" Agnes asked in lieu of any actual words.

"I'm going to go to Fingen's and get some of my thoughts out," Cooker whispered and bent down to kiss her forehead once she nodded at Cooker's explanation.

Her intent was not to lie to Agnes, but that is what ended up happening. If she went to Fingen's at this hour, people would still be up from the night before. And if they were up, it was because something was fueling them. There was never a better time to avoid being around loli or anything similar. Instead of heading inland, she turned and walked toward the beach.

It would be early enough that the beach she usually went to would be empty and she would have a moment alone. Given her state, it was not the best idea but it was better than being with people and around what she couldn't have. The walk there felt like she stepped through a portal, one blink and the sand was beneath her feet and the water was lapping at her ankles.

She had often found peace with the ocean but for different reasons than the others around her. Most of them had Riva and they would come to the water to pray or connect. For her, it was just the water itself that calmed her. Riva had never appeared to her or made her presence known to Cooker. Yet, Theo claimed to have seen her.

It wasn't that Cooker didn't believe in the gods. They were probably real and probably from a time long forgotten but she remained yet to be convinced that the reason they were so protected on the water was because of Riva. According to Theo and Navi, that was exactly what was happening but to her, they were just that good.

She sat down fully, letting the water from the gentle waves engulf her lower half. She had never really understood why she was never visited by anyone. Xyra believed in the gods but never believed she was good enough to be contacted by any. Was it Cooker's lack of belief in their abilities and their role in the world or was it that she was unworthy of them all?

Or was it just luck who got a god and who didn't?

The topic of religion occupied her mind. It was like an object to chew on for a teething child. It eased her mind and her pain when other thoughts would start to surface. She went through an endless debate in her head. Thinking on the existence of gods, their morality if they were able to help everyone and choose not to, and the extent that they had insight into their followers' lives.

It wasn't until the sun was higher up in the sky and more people began to trickle into her small slice of solitude that she decided to get up and find her next activity. Agnes would likely still be sleeping with Florence after having taken Maise to school. So, Cooker didn't want to bother her. Her best bet would be to go to the person she hadn't wanted to see. Cooker gathered her courage and set off for Marian's.

She opened the door and inside were a few of the business owners under their protection. Kaia was tending to them, her face looked weary and she must have been exhausted with only a few hours of sleep before having to work again. Theo had probably tried to help but seeing her nowhere indicated that she had most likely been shooed away.

Cooker managed to catch Kaia's attention who wordlessly pointed upstairs and Cooker nodded. She made her way to the top floor. Sure enough, Theo was in the bedroom. She was asleep and Cooker quietly maneuvered around the room. She changed into dry clothes, wiped the sand off wherever she could feel some, and climbed into bed.

Theo shifted and opened her eyes, peering over at Cooker with slight confusion, "Cook? You 'kay?"

She nodded and slipped under the covers too, glancing over at Theo for a moment to see that she was still being looked at.

"I went to Agnes', the beach, and then came back here," Cooker said as she adjusted the pillows behind her to her liking, "I didn't go anywhere else."

"Mm. Alright," Theo yawned and closed her eyes again, "just asked if you were good."

"Aye. I'm good," Cooker said and it was neither a lie nor entirely the truth. She was good at the moment. She turned on her side, facing her back toward Theo.

"I'm so fucking pissed at you," Theo said through yet another yawn and wrapped her arms around Cooker. She huffed a sleepy sigh, "We got the letter. Tunnels. That's how we get there."

Cooker smiled for the first time in a while without a sense of dread, "Fuck yes."