Kat couldn't sleep, even if she felt exhausted. After about an hour of pacing around her bed chamber, she came to the conclusion that she needed to keep her mind occupied. So she did the next best thing. 

Her mind still buzzing, she locked herself in the library and started reading up on the kingdom's laws and policies. Anything that would disprove what Cage had said, that would justify her latent anger at him, the disappointment she felt.

It was harder than it seemed. She spent the following day buried in books, only leaving the room for elementary needs like food and sleep, and came up with so little.

The books supporting Cage's story were older than the ones she had read from the library in her village. And out of all the legislation she'd studied, Cage was guilty of three crimes.

Showing mercy to pirates, speaking ill of the royal family and disrespecting the kingdom policy regarding use of magic.

Everything that she felt was wrong was not only tolerated, but encouraged. The right to challenge anyone to a duel was considered chivalrous, fundamental, and there was absolutely no rule against winning them. Turning down the challenge was perceived as cowardly.

Bedding random girls was also not even frowned upon as long as the ladies consented. And one look at Cage was enough to assume he never had to force himself on anyone. Kat seriously doubted he was capable of something like that anyway.

He'd actually tried to make things better, to be humane, and yet she seethed with anger at him.

Anger that it took him so long to break free of the norms, anger that he wasn't perfect. He was a soldier, of course he killed. Her father had been in the army when Iride was at war with Endir, so he'd obviously killed as well. She was sure that, if given the chance, Donnie would go on a rampage with a smile on his face. He'd probably won his fair share of duels over randomd town girls.

But she needed reassurance that Cage wasn't like that, that he treasured life, and every dead body he'd left behind had chipped at his soul.

With a groan, Kat dropped her forehead against the table. She was such a stupid little girl. She'd grabbed her father's sword the moment she had the faintest reason. There were murderous voices whispering in her ear from time to time, and yet she had the audacity to judge him.

Fed up with the continuous pounding of her head, she shut the last book and stood. Cage was supposed to be the king and he was just a normal man who had tried to do better and failed. Then he was cursed for not wanting a fling with a sea siren or a fae, or whatever the hell Cecile was. And she'd have to learn to live with that or leave.

Because he'd set her free. And at the moment, there was nothing she wanted more than to escape this castle in which her fantasy of the perfect prince had gone to ruin. So she exited the library, went to her room, put on the dress and cloak she'd arrived in, and headed down the stairs.

"Kat, what are you doing?" Joey asked, his voice high with panic.

"Goodbye, Joey," she said, not stopping.

"That's not fair, you know he's not guilty of anything," Joey called out after her.

Kat's heart tightened at his words, but she didn't falter and stepped out of the castle. The chilly wind cut through her skin, but she ignored it and kept a steady pace. Halfway to the gate, she stopped.

Though it was day, there was no guarantee that wolves wouldn't attack her again. She needed weapons. So she turned on her heels, marched to the armory and picked up a bow, a small axe and her father's sword, then headed back to the gate.

She had reached it when she faltered again. Maybe she should take a horse. LIilygreen. She would look after the mare and it wasn't like Cage would miss her. He had Stormblack after all.

Yes, maybe she should take Lilygreen. So she turned again and headed for the stables.

"What are you doing?"

She jumped a mile at his voice. Even if she knew she shouldn't, she turned to face him. There he was, right next to the rose fountain, his arms crossed over his chest, once again clean shaven and looking as gorgeous as ever.

"I'm leaving," she said, though the words seemed to tear a hole in her throat.

"I gathered that, and I was very sad the first time, but since this is the second time you come back, it's starting to lose its punch."

Heat rose to her cheeks, but she wasn't sure if she was embarrassed or pleased that he didn't want her to go.

"You're making it very easy for me right now, you do know that, right?"

"Of course. I noticed while training you that you tend to do things out of spite."

"That's not true!"

"Isn't it?" He lowered his arms and walked to her, stopping far enough to not tempt her to touch him. "Your progress is due entirely to you wanting to prove me wrong."

That was very true, but she wasn't about to admit it, to thank him for everything, to dissolve into tears and seek his arms. She was strong and independent and mad at him for being human, so she was finally going home.

"I hate you," she said simply.

"I love you too, sweetheart," he said with a grin.

The words hurt, eased into her soul and became a weight on her chest, but she refuses to succumb to them. Be that as it may, it didn't fix anything. Despite what she'd first thought, love wasn't magical. It didn't make everything go away.

"I'm still leaving."

His smile didn't falter, but something behind his eyes seemed to break. "I understand."

"I just wanted to take Lilygreen."

He waved towards the stables. "Be my guest. She likes you a lot more than me anyway."

She had been his guest, for the past two months. Two months in which she'd grown so much, in which she'd learned to think for herself even more, to fend for herself, to love herself for who she was. Two months in which no one gave her funny looks or scoffed at her.

But it was over.

Her chin trembled and she glanced at her feet, but she refused to cry.

"Do you want me to take you home?" he asked quietly.

She nodded before she could register his words properly, but she was grateful that her answer made him head towards the stables so she could wipe her eyes unseen. By the time he returned riding Stormblack, she'd pulled herself together enough to scoff at him.

"Where's my horse?"

"I changed my mind. I think Lilygreen and Stormblack might be having a secret affair, so I'm not tearing them apart." He reached out his hand. "Coming, or what?"

Before she could send more insults his way for creating a love story between their horses, he grabbed her arm and lifted her into the saddle with ease. Then she was seated sideways, in front of him, trapped between him and Stormblack's pitch black mane.

She bit her lip hard, trying once again not to cry as they headed out the gate. But she would miss him, the heat of his body, how easily they talked, how he constantly challenged her to be better.

Deciding all that didn't matter, she focused on her surroundings. The forest was dark, even in the day, the pale winter light no match for the snow laden branches of the trees. All she could hear was the hooves of the horse and her own, labored breathing. There was no animal in sight, no birds singing.

Cage leaned towards her and rested his cheek on top of her head, his arms tightening the slightest bit around her. She thought it was nothing but a temporary thing, like a hug, but he didn't move as they kept on going.

"What are you doing?" she asked, because it hurt her more than she cared to admit.

Tears filled her eyes again and her heart thumped as if it wanted to spend a thousand years with him, wrapped in his arms, while her brain screamed savagely against it.

"Basking in you," he mumbled into her hair.

"Well, stop it."

He complied instantly, straightening and loosening his hold on her. The moment his body detached from hers, her very essence seemed to freeze and a lingering ache settled in her chest.

"I'm sorry. I'm just very aware this is the last time I'll see you, have the chance to touch you."

That broke her heart even more. "Why couldn't you be better?"

He let out a laugh, but it was humorless. "Because I was proud and stupid. I just got better because I spent the past eight years studying and judging my experiences properly. My brain finally caught up with my body. I do wish I could've done this before, but youth is always in a hurry."

He made a very good point. Had she not been imprisoned and had the proper time to study, she wouldn't know half the things she did now. Tired as she was from day to day life, she couldn't focus on serious, heavy topics. So she chose the much easier literature which did broaden her mind, but not as much as studying.

That was the reality of her world. People were so drained by surviving, they didn't have the time to uncover their true potential.

She hated that she understood. It chipped away at her anger because she was judging him a lot harsher than she judged herself or anyone else. But, in truth, she had higher expectations of him than anyone she'd ever met. So she decided to focus on what drove her out of the castle in the first place.

"Is it easy for you? Killing?"

He hesitated and it drove a new nail into her heart. He was supposed to say no, relieve her concern. Instead, he was doing a lot of thinking which made her suspicious that he might come forth with a lie.

"That's not exactly a straightforward question," he finally said, slowing the horse to a crawling pace. "My skills with weaponry make it easy, but I'm pretty sure that's not what you mean. You're trying to ask me if I enjoy it or if I feel remorse after I do it. No, I don't enjoy it, but I do recognize it for what it is: a basic necessity in my line of work." He let out a deep sigh. "I understand your concern because you've never been faced with the choice of your life for someone else's. And it's lackluster, believe me. When you're in a battle, it's you and maybe your friends against something that wants to kill you."

"Something?" she asked, outraged. "Those are people."

"Yes, people who consider you a piece of meat with a sword, the same way you consider them. It's the only way war works. If you don't demonize and dehumanize your opponent, you wouldn't be able to do it. It comes easier for some than for others."

"Was it easy for you?" She didn't like this conversation, not one bit. Especially because it made her feel like a naïve idiot. She didn't understand war. She understood the concept of it, of course, but she'd never been in any even slightly similar situation.

Cage was silent for a moment again. "You love animals, don't you?"

She turned her face to gave him a skeptical look. "Of course. They're living things, just like people, and often much gentler."

"Yet, do you regret killing the wolves in the forest?"

Her breath caught in her throat. "It is not the same thing!"

"Why? Because wolves can't talk? Because they can't be reasoned with? Trust me, a vast majority of people are the same, especially when you speak different languages."

She gritted her teeth, the anger growing inside her because he dared reason his way out of this. "What about those men defending the girls' honor? Were they beyond reason?"

His entire body stiffened and she knew she'd hit a nerve. A sense of satisfaction washed through her, but it only added to her pain.

"I want to make one thing clear," Cage finally said. "I was always honest with every woman I took to bed. I never threw around empty words or promises. No love, no marriage. They knew what they would be getting. And so did their protectors because I made sure to make it clear that I made no promises. I've never even told a woman I loved her before you, because I've never been in love before."

His tone was even as he recounted this and Kat clutched her skirt tightly, trying once again not to cry.

"Some people understood and walked away. Some insisted I was a liar or that it didn't matter. Yes, that is killing I regret. Because it was pointless and because it was brought about by my pride rather than basic necessity."

"Would you take it back?" she whispered.

"In a heartbeat. Pride is a silly, feeble thing. Just a projection of the norms of society upon the character. And if there's something I've learned while being alone, it's that you don't need it to live."

She fell silent for a moment, taking it all in.

"I do value life," he said. "Value it enough to know that for it to strive as a whole, sometimes you need to snuff some of it out."

"That's harsh."

"Think of it like cutting the branches of a tree in spring to help it grow taller and stronger in the summer."

That was also harsh, but true. She tightened her jaw, because something else was at the forefront of her mind now.

"Why me?" she asked. "Out of all the girls in the world, why me?"

"Because you are kind and innocent. Because you can still dream in a world smudged with darkness. Because you're brave and not afraid to speak your mind. Because you yelled at me when I deserved it." He tightened his hold around her again. "I thought I loved you before I saw you, but it was nothing compared to what followed. You faced me, were not impressed by my looks, by my standing. Even this... You're calling me out on my failures. And I love you even more for it."

She bit the insides of her cheeks and they rode in silence for a while. It hurt so much. She should've never let him come with her. It only made everything harder. Harder to think, harder to breathe. She loved him too, so much it killed her. And yet, something inside her didn't let her take it back, ask him to turn around.

"So, have you given any thought to what you're going to do now?" he asked, his tone light, normal.

"What do you mean? I'm going home." Her voice was so wet, but she sniffed and pulled herself together.

"I know that. I meant once you get there. About your father. About Donnie."

Oh, gods, Donnie! She'd completely forgotten about him. Even if the deadline for his ultimatum had long passed, he might still want an answer. She couldn't marry him, not when her heart bled with love for another man. And he'd keep pestering her until she snapped. Then he would ostracize her even more until she would have no work, no money, no future in that town. They'd have to move. Even so...

"I'm not marrying Donnie," she said, but it was the only thing she was certain of.

"Why not?" Cage asked, and to his credit only sounded mildly interested.

"Because he's an idiot. Because everything I hate about you is inside him tenfold. He may have never killed anyone, but I'm sure he would if given the chance." And it was highly unlikely he hadn't had other women. Why else would he wait for her for three years?

Cage said nothing. She twisted on the horse to face him. He pulled the rains to stop the stallion and looked down at her with pride. Out of everything, there was pride in his eyes. And love. So much love.

"You've grown so much," he said. "I know you'll manage whatever you put your mind to."

His words should have made her feel better, but they only broke her further. Because there was one thing that he'd said which, for some reason, weighed more than anything else. "Is it true?" she asked. "That you've never loved anyone before me."

He nodded, the pain behind his pride coming to the forefront. And at that moment, she realized something was wrong. Very, very wrong. He'd just professed his love to her, held her, traveled with her away from the castle.

"Where is the beast?"

Cage let out a short, bitter laugh. "It only comes out when I'm filled with positive feelings, not when I'm tearing myself apart. I don't even think it could face this heartache."

"Why are you heartbroken?"

"Because I'm letting the love of my life walk away."

"Why are you letting her?"

"Because it's her choice and I respect that."

The tears finally tumbled down her cheeks, but she didn't care. She took his face in her hands and pulled him closer, wanting to take this little piece of him with her. Their lips searched each other, hungry and desperate.

His arms tightened around her and he pulled her into his lap, pressing her against him, kissing her with so much passion, her head spun. She tried to match it because she'd never done it before. Never kissed a man properly. But it was easy. Her hands knew where to move, her mouth knew what to do, and her entire body felt like it was floating. Finally tasting him after all this time was as amazing as she had imagined.

He was hot and overwhelming, raw and passionate, the sum of all his flaws and it made him perfect. Because he made no excuses, because he fought to be better.

She pulled away, her breathing hindered by her stuffy nose, but kept her forehead stuck to his.

"I love you so much," he muttered. "If you ever need anything, wherever you choose to go, I'm one letter away." He passed the golden notebook into her hands.

Wherever she chose to go... She had no idea where she wanted to go, but she appreciated that he wasn't begging her to stay with him. Though secretly, she wished he would.

"I..." By the gods, she wanted to kiss him again. She wanted to kiss him forever.

"Me too," he said. "But you need this. We're here."

"We are?" Her head snapped up and she glanced over her shoulder.

They were just a few trees away from the edge of the forest. If she looked really carefully, she could see the distant outline of her house.

"This is where our journey ends," he said.

She appreciated the naturalness in his voice, how he didn't make it harder for her to hop out of his lap, off the horse and step towards her home.

"Thank you," she said. "For everything."

He smiled, crossing his arms over the saddle. "Any time, sweetheart. Just promise me you'll never forget who you are. Don't let the world bring you down when you were born to fly."

Born to burn. Burn down the world.

She shook her head, driving the voices back. Violent and unwelcomed as usual. "I won't. I promise."

He took a small pouch from the pocket of his cloak and tossed it to her. "Your pay."

She caught it out of reflex. "My what?"

"You were my servant, not my slave. So you deserve the money. A little something to get you through the winter."

She wasn't so sure about that, but was well aware she might starve to death if she didn't accept it. No more full pantry and enormous kitchen. So she just said, "Thank you."

"Goodbye then. I'm sorry I couldn't be someone you deserve."

She bit her lip because she wasn't so sure about that, but now that she was so close to home, it was impossible not to go in, see her father, hug him.

"I..." She didn't know what to say to him. "I'm sorry, too," she finally said, though it was hardly enough.

But if she looked at him any longer, she wouldn't be able to leave. So Kat turned her back to him and charged out of the forest. The snow crunched under her new boots, so at least she had that going for her.

With a heavy heart, she pressed on, leaving her new life behind and running towards the old.

This was totally not where this chapter was going. Oh well. Kat is back home. Time for her to settle down and marry Donnie, right? 😅

What do you think about her choice? Is she being a hypocrite? And what will happen now?

You didn't get the magic ball. Will I end the story? All the drama!

Thanks for reading. Hit the star for support and leave me a comment if you love me 😁