A/N:  I hope this chap will help you understand Jungkook a little bit more.

***

"You do have the rights to hate that fucking idiot" Yoongi snaps, a deep scowl on his face, making Taehyung's bed dip every time he moves after an exclamation against Jeon Jeongguk. "Don't even justify him. I don't even care about his reasons, he fucked up" he warns when Taehyung moves slightly from his lying position in the bed, opening his mouth to say something back. But Yoongi was super angry, the usual pale skin of his face was slightly red, flushed and his eyes sharper and smaller, and he wouldn't let Taehyung talk. "I'm going to fucking hit his head. I fucking told you, Tae, he's not dating material. Why are you so fucking stubborn??"

"Stop cursing, hyung" says Taehyung, voice soft and raspy from the previous crying. He cried for what it seems hours alone in a park until he was strong enough to go back home. But his eyes were red, and the sour scent coming from him revealed him to Yoongi. Taehyung had no other choice but to tell everything to his cousin. "I don't want to think about him anymore" he says, sniffs, and exhales a shaky breath. "I want to sleep, I'm tired..."

Yoongi's gaze soften, and he let his shoulder slump tiredly, placing a hand on his younger cousin back, patting him in a comforting way. "Tae, we should be celebrating" he tells, smiling. "Your article was published in the newspaper. That's one huge accomplishment"

Taehyung sniffs again, hiding his face in the pillow. "No" he whines, his voice sounding muffled. "That article reminds me of him" says Taehyung, his voice incredible broken. "I hate it"

"Taehyung..."

"Just let me sleep, hyung" says Taehyung again, turning his head to look at Yoongi. His forehead was creased, and his big eyes swollen, red, and sad. Yoongi furrows his eyebrows, letting out an exasperated breath. The phone lying carelessly on Taehyung's desk started ringing again, for the fifth time in half an hour it was ringing, and Taehyung just let it ring, not bothering to check who was calling him. But Yoongi was already annoying by the sound, he stands up quickly from the bed walking towards the desk and grabbing the phone.

Jeongguk was calling...

"Let me just give him a piece of my mind and I-" Yoongi begins, wanting to answer the phone, but Taehyung was quick to jump from the bed and take it, throwing it under the bed. Yoongi sighs, "You could at least have turned the fucking phone off" says the beta. "Who even has the default ringtone?"

"Hyung... stop"

"Fine" says Yoongi, shaking his head. "Sleep" he says pushing Taehyung back into the bed. "Call me if you need anything and we'll talk tomorrow" the words came out softly from Yoongi's' mouth, and Taehyung smiles at that, remembering all the times his cousin stood up for him when he was in school, how many times Yoongi threat someone to hit their head because of him. He loves his hyung, but at the moment he just wanted to be alone, and sleep, forget about everything, just forget...

--

"Taehyung" Yoongi's voice sounded razor-sharp to Taehyung's ears when his head felt heavy, his eyes sting from the previous day, and he was still tired. "You didn't go to classes" says Yoongi, standing warily at the door, "It's past 12..."

"Oh..." Taehyung mutters, turning lazily his body to look at his cousin. "I've overslept..."

"Fuck Taehyung" Yoongi breathes frustrated. "You can't let a stupid infatuation get you all depressed"

It wasn't as if Yoongi was insensitive. But he was frustrated, not knowing what to say or do to make Taehyung feel better. And when Taehyung sat down on the bed just to glare at him he didn't know if he should go and hug him or go and curse at Jeongguk. 

"I'm sad" says Taehyung. "Let me be damn sad about it"

Yoongi sighs, loudly, and his posture slump more. "You should speak to him" he tells, "So far you're only making assumptions"

Taehyung stares at him, nods his head, he knows he should speak to Jeongguk, answer his phone or reply to his texts, but he was scared of the answer, of the excuse Jeongguk may throw at him. He was afraid his heart would break more. 

"I will..." says Taehyung, "It's just..." he pauses, knits his eyebrows and look away, "I like him... I like him so much its hurts"

Yoongi closes his eyes and groans, "Fucking hell Tae" he swears, shaking his head, "I'm going to need reinforcements" he groans, turning around and leaving the room. Taehyung frowns, watching his cousin go. He gets up from the bed, kneeling on the floor and looks under it for his phone.

It was out of battery. Taehyung plugs the charger, waiting for a bit to turn on the phone. He felt a dreadful feeling in his stomach, anticipating Jeongguk's explanation, wishing for the situation to be a misunderstanding, perhaps he read the signals wrong, and he judged Jeongguk terrible again. A part of him was begging for that to be the case, but his logical part knew very well it was Jeongguk's scent on that boy, Jeongguk's shirt, Jeongguk's marks, Jeongguk's everything. 

He felt like crying all over again, but Yoongi was right, and he needed to hear the truth from Jeongguk himself. So Taehyung picks up his charging phone, he had more than 10 missed calls, and a bunch of text messages too, all of those were from Jeongguk.

Jeon Jeongguk

23:04 Tae, please answer your phone

00:15 Taehyung, I've been calling you all night

00:30 Tae, I can explain

01:15 Peachy come on, let me explain

You're misreading everything

01:20 Please talk to me?

02:45 Taehyung  :(

08:00 Hey...

08:02 I forgot to tell you, congrats for being published

I read the article just now and it was amazing

I thought you were going to portray me as a spoiled alpha full of testosterone

Well you did, but in a cooler way

08:30 I've never text someone this much before

I have a family thing now...

I'll call you later, please answer

Taehyung closes his eyes, releasing the breath he was holding the entire time he was reading the messages. Perhaps he was really misreading the whole situation, and Jeongguk had a reasonable explanation that didn't involve him fucking the beta boy in his apartment. Taehyung hesitates, into replying to Jeongguk's texts, call him, or just wait for the alpha to call him again, which was the most acceptable option in his head at the moment. Taehyung opts to take a shower, the warm water relaxing his body and calming his mind, hot showers were always a sort of meditation for him.

But once he gets out from the shower, all the calmness turned into a knot on his stomach when his phone starts buzzing with an upcoming call from Jeongguk. He wraps the white towel around his waist tightly and leaves the one for his hair in the bathroom, letting drops of water to fall from his hair to his shoulders, and he picks up the phone.

Jeongguk didn't waste taste into waiting for Taehyung to speak. "Taehyung" calls Jeongguk, his voice almost relief, "Can we talk?"

Just hearing the alpha's voice was devastating, Jeongguk sounded soothing as usual, even when his voice tingled with desperation. Taehyung sighs, run two thin fingers through his soaked hair, "I don't want to talk to you"

"Taehyung" says Jeongguk again, his voice now edging into a frustrated tone. "You can't be angry at me without hearing me out"

Jeongguk was right, Taehyung knew that, but he couldn't help himself but to be petty about. He pauses, sitting on the bed, "Fine" he says, "I'm listening"

"Not over the phone" says Jeongguk, rather quickly, "I want to talk to you in person"

"Well I don't" Taehyung replies sharply, unconsciously pouting, and glaring at nothing, "Explain, I'm listening"

"I'm fucking driving" Jeongguk's tone was getting sharper, between frustrated and angry. But Taehyung didn't answer, he was petty, and if Jeongguk wanted to speak to him, that was the only way for him, he wasn't risking his weak heart against Jeongguk's charming words and handsome face by meeting him in person. "Fine" says Jeongguk, clearing his throat, "Let me explain"

"Explain"

"Tae, first of all" Jeongguk starts, pauses, and Taehyung hears the sound of the engine of his jeep going off. "I'm really amazed by your article. You're incredibly talented"

Taehyung rolls his eyes, "Thank you" he says, pauses again, and closes his eyes, "Who was the boy at your apartment?"

Jeongguk didn't answer right away, and the silence was only making Taehyung even more anxious. "That was Jae..." he begins, hesitates, and Taehyung felt the knot in his stomach getting tighter.

"Jae" repeats Taehyung, swallowing.

"Jaemin is my..." Taehyung hears him inhaling deeply again, "He's my rut buddy"

Taehyung's breath hitches, and the knot on his stomach turns into something sour, something so bitter it was giving him a heartburn. 

"I imagine something like that" he tells, Jeongguk said to him he was going to be out of reach for three days, and an alpha's rut usually wears out after three days and happens once a month, unlike an omega's heat which last for a week but only happens during mating season. But rut or not, Jeongguk lied to him, "You should have told me"

Jeongguk exhales over the phone, "Maybe I should have..." he says, "But I thought you wouldn't understand"

"I would if you have the guts to explain it to me" Taehyung spits, feeling a sudden resentment rushing through him, resembling the time he broke up with Bogum, how the mixture of emotions felt like choking for him.

"Taehyung come on. It's not a big deal" says Jeongguk, sounding frustrated again, "It just a rut, I don't ever remember most of it"

"You fucked someone else when you told me you wouldn't"

He hears Jeongguk sighing loudly again, "It doesn't count" he says, "I was on my fucking rut" he growls over the phone, "What do you want me to do? To feel like dying for three days?? I bet you don't even know how an alpha's rut works. It's in my nature and I can't fight against natural order. I'm an alpha, Taehyung"

Taehyung frowns, suddenly Jeongguk sounded just like any other alpha, like Bogum or like the cocky alphas from college. He sounded like a jerk, like he was just throwing a tantrum over him with his toxic alpha masculinity. 

"I may be an omega but I'm still a man" says Taehyung, his voice intense and firm, "Don't talk to me like you're part of some alpha supremacy bullshit" he speaks, and all his previous sadness begin to turn into anger, "All I was asking from you was to keep your promise"

"I didn't break my promise" Jeongguk was quick to defend himself, "I was barely aware of what was happening, the state of conscious during a rut is very minimal..." he says, a pleading tinge on his tone, ridiculously small but present, "Please believe me?" he asks, more determined, and he questions again, "Tae... would you? would you have understood my position and allowed it?"

Taehyung's anger starts dissipating, he knits his brows and gulps, "I don't know..."

"That's why I didn't tell you" says Jeongguk, frustrated, annoyed, aggravated, "Can we talk in person later? I'm on my family's law firm right now..."

"Okay" replies Taehyung, nods his head even when the alpha wasn't looking at him, "Okay let's talk"

"Thank you" says Jeongguk, "I'll pick you up later, okay?"

"Okay..."

Taehyung hang up the phone, pressing the apparatus tightly against his chest. He could understand Jeongguk, he would understand him if he weren't in the receiving end. Perhaps other people wouldn't mind sharing the person they care about with a 'rut partner' or 'heat partner' when they themselves weren't ready to be in that role for them, perhaps for some people it was common, natural, but not for him. For most of his colleagues sex was just sex, a sort of way of releasing stress and getting pleasure, sex was fir satisfying their more basic instincts, not feelings involve.

Sex was different from love.

But Taehyung could not understand how such an intimate act could be meaningless, not when it would be his body at full disposition of another person, not when having sex involve giving his body to that person.

He could try to understand someone like Jeongguk, who has sex to have an orgasm, who probably after delivering and getting pleasure, he takes off and continues with his life, satisfied and without a worry. But Taehyung wasn't like that, and wouldn't want to be like that, not it all. He may be old fashioned, he was raised that way, but he has strong values and standards, and he desperately want to be treated that way, with the importance and respect he deserved.

He also knew how risky was to meet with Jeongguk and talk, he was weak for the alpha, and Jeongguk had a way with words that he could turn the biggest bullshit into something enchanting, and Taehyung just likes Jeongguk so much.

The door of his bedroom burst opens, startling him awake from his confusing thoughts. It was Jimin, wearing big Chanel sunglasses and carrying one of his captivating smiles. "Get dress, babe" says the omega, "We are going out"

--

It turn out Yoongi called Jimin, and Jimin called Seokjin, and Jimin took Taehyung to Seokjin's villa because he had a big pool, and apparently invited them to a spa party day. The villa was of course ubicated in the outskirts of Seoul, and the day was sunny enough for them to wear swimsuits to get beautiful tans while relaxing next to the swimming pool and being catered by Seokjin's handsome butler who was also wearing swim trunks, and a bowtie.

"Seokjin hyung is a perv" Jimin whispers to Taehyung while pulling him towards the enormous patio after changing their clothes to swimsuits. "His omega dad is also a perv" he giggles, and Taehyung snorts, remembering how outspoken and dramatic Seokjin's dad was.

Seokjin waves at them, already resting in one of the sun lounges in front of the pool, with some huge sunglasses on and an equally huge hat. There was a Spa Set on a table, with essentials oils, cucumber slices, and fresh water with rose petals. And also a small bar with the half-naked butler preparing fruity cocktails for them. The older omega enjoyed the luxurious lifestyle he was privilege of having.

Taehyung follows Jimin, the omega had not mention Jeongguk or anything, but Taehyung knew he would bring it up eventually, and he was sure Seokjin also knew about the whole situation. And a part of him wanted to tell them, hear their advice, because he was just so utterly confused that was probably going to affect him into making the right decision.

"Hi gorgeous" says Seokjin, to both of them, pointing towards the other sun lounges, "Welcome to the Kim Seokjin's lounge spa" he says, earning a scoff from Jimin and a small smile from Taehyung, "We are starting with a couple of mimosas, and a massage"

"Mimosas?" asks Taehyung, brows raising in surprise, "I haven't even had lunch"

"Nonsense" Seokjin waves off, relaxing back in the sun lounge, "Take it as an aperitive" he says, handing Jimin a bottle of sunscreen, "We'll have lunch after the massage"

Seokjin wasn't kidding when he welcomed them to a lounge spa. The omega hired a Spa staff for them, bringing along all the necessities for an extraordinary day, relaxing and healing. The three women, part of the hired staff, lighted aromatic candles, and asked them what type of massage they wanted. Seokjin pick a foot massage, Jimin and Taehyung a hot stone massage, because both were pretty excited to have heated stones on their bodies.

"This feel fucking amazing" Jimin whines, resting his head to a side and letting the woman worked on his tensed muscle of his back, and placing a black river stone in his spine every time she was done with a point of pressure.

"This is actually heaven" Taehyung almost moans, drinking from the champagne flute glass, and almost moaning again, "And this is delicious" he says, tasting the strawberry juice, range juice and sparkling wine, while his masseuse was working on his right leg.

"It's your fourth glass" Jimin says, in a scolding tone of voice, peering at Taehyung with just one eye open, "Don't get drunk or Yoongi would kill me"

"Let the boy relax" says Seokjin, his glasses still perched on, and having his feet in the bowl of water with roses petals, "Are you feeling better now?" he asks, drinking his own mimosa and enjoying the sun, "Are you ready to hear our advices?"

"Yes" Taehyung says, taking another sip from his drink, he felt lighter and much less depressed then before, not even angry anymore, "Please do because I'm currently fucking clueless"

"Taehyung don't curse! You don't curse!" says Jimin, throwing a piece of cucumber to Taehyung who easily catch it with his hand.

"I'm drunk" he says, shrugs, "And sad"

"Drunk and sad can't be in the same sentence, sweetie" says Seokjin putting his sunglasses down to look at him, watching him deliberately, scanning his whole body, "You have ridiculous long legs, never thought of modeling?"

"No" says Taehyung, humming pleased when the woman put a heated stone behind his thigh. 

Jimin laughs from his lounge seat, flinching when the masseuse press a stone too hard on his lower back, "Hyung" he calls at Seokjin, "Taehyung takes suppressants"

"Oh" Seokjin blinks at him, surprised, "Why?"

Taehyung knits his eyebrows, "Well because... because I didn't want to lose my virginity under the haze of a heat"

"Ah" Seokjin nods his head, putting his sunglasses back on, "Yet you're sad because Jeongguk spent his rut with someone, knowing he was under the haze of a rut"

Taehyung tenses, sipping the remaining liquid of his flute glass, "No" he says, shakes his head, "I'm mad because he didn't tell me, I had to found out like an idiot when I went to his apartment and actually met his rut partner"

"Perhaps he made a mistake, but you shouldn't blame him for doing what he did" Seokjin says, and Taehyung scoffs, incredulous, "I'm serious, sweetheart. Jeonggukie is an alpha and alphas think they are kings of the world with because they are at the top of the dominance hierarchy, and Jeonggukie is not exception, no matter how charming he may seem to you"

"I know that" Taehyung sighs, taking another glass of mimosa, this time it was a cranberry one, and he takes a sip, licks his lips and looks at Seokjin, "But he's sweet to me, really sweet, and smart, strong, and so handsome... it was easy to fall for him"

"Ah you got to know the real Jeonggukie then" says Seokjin waving at the butler to bring them another round of mimosas, "He only reserves that part of him to his close friends"

"Yeah" Jimin says, agreeing completely, "We know Jeonggukie for years, I've known him since we were kids, and I can clearly see he genuinely likes you Tae"

"You're not helping me" Taehyung whines, burying his face in his hand after leaving his glass of mimosa in a small round table by the sun lounge, the masseuse was done with him, but he still was wearing the heated stones on his body, "He can like me but he doesn't want to put a label on our relationship" he says, his voice sounding softer, "First I saw him with a girl on the street, then hooking up with another girl at the Halloween party, and now with that beta boy he fucks for his ruts" he tells them with a muffled voice, not wanting to look at his friends while revealing everything, "I can't do this, I just can't... I'm not that kind of boy who does casual relationships"

Jimin watches him, an obvious sadness on his face, but he remained quiet, but Seokjin was looking at him with a hard gaze, "Jeongguk has never had a relationship with anyone. Probably the only relationship he ever had was his platonic love for IU when he was 12 years old" he says, earning the attention of Taehyung who turns his head to stare at the older omega, "I believe he was honest with you about it, and I believe he did try to be with you without another hookups around, excluding the rut buddy" he says, pauses and his gaze soften, "You shouldn't be angry because he spend his rut with someone else, we all do, that's how high society works"

"Seokjin kind of has a point" Jimin says, accommodating his body as best as he could with the heated stones on his back, "In our society omegas and alphas are practically force to spend our circles with beta males" he says, looks away for a moment, "Beta males can't knot or get pregnant"

Taehyung looks down at nothing in particular. He knew that, Jimin told him that when he first explained the nature of his relationship with Yoongi. 'Betas can't knot an omega' he had said that time, and he mentioned his own mother searching betas for Jimin to spend his heats with. But in his case, it was something shameful, his grandmother made sure of teaching him that, to be ashamed of his nature.

"Alphas with omegas, and betas with betas, that's our society rule in regard of mates" says Seokjin, raising his glass before drinking it, he swallow the liquid with ease, as it was just cranberry juice, "If Jeongguk didn't spend his ruts with some beta boy he would be looked down upon, especially from his family full of alphas"

"It wouldn't be very alpha to not fuck during his ruts" Jimin says rolling his eyes. "But us omegas have to spend our circles almost shamefully"

"At least mating season for omegas happens like four times a year" says Seokjin with a loud scoff, even the staff women giggled at their words, knowing the truth about them.

Society was unfair, Taehyung's own omega nature was unfair for him. Suddenly he felt like a fool, knowing they were right, Jeongguk was only following the rules society impose to him because he is an alpha, and he wondered how he would have reacted if Jeongguk had told him about his rut, about how he was supposed to spend it with a designed partner.

It was clear for him what to do, as much as he was hurt, and how hard his friends words may seem to him, he knew what to do. His mind went back to Daegu, to Bogum having his own ruts. Taehyung knew the alpha spent his ruts by himself but now hearing what Jin and Jimin were saying he questions if that was the truth. Because Bogum never looked bruised or horrible exhausted, he always came back to Taehyung looking pristine, and everyone knew enduring a rut was difficult for an alpha. He bets his own grandmother would find it 'normal' or 'natural' if Bogum spent his ruts with betas, he wonder if he did that, and she knew about it, and suddenly he felt so betrayed. But of course they wouldn't think that way, after all it was just sex, and Bogum's love was reserved only for Taehyung.

Bullshit, everything was bullshit. Now he have to question himself about his choices, if he likes Jeongguk enough to let him spend his ruts with someone else until he is ready to give his body to him, or if he was strong enough to break things with the alpha.

"Jeongguk really likes you, Tae" says Jimin, distracting him once again from the heavy thoughts in his head, "He never pays so much attention to anybody like he does with you, but his lifestyle has been that way since forever. His family taught him to be that way, and I don't think he's going to change"

"I understand" Taehyung replies to him, get more comfortable on the sun lounge and closes his eyes, "I'm going to talk to him today" he tells them, "I'm figuring out what to choose"

Seokjin call his butler, asks him to tell the cook to prepare a delicious meal for them, and he turns his attention back at Taehyung, "You said you didn't want to start a new relationship after just breaking up with your ex" he tells Taehyung, grins at him, "You have two options here, darling. Continue to have a casual fling with Jeongguk, or end things with him too"

"Yeah" Taehyung says, not opening his eyes, afraid he would tear up in front of them, "It's just I like him so much..."

"Jeonggukie is a heartbreaker" Seokjin tells him, kind of forcing Taehyung to look at him, the younger omega did, even when his eyes stinged, "I've known a lot of his conquests, most of them ended up heartbroken" he says, his voice still hard, and somehow Taehyung was thankful for that, because no one likes pity, "End things with him if you don't want your heart broken"

"Hyung-" Jimin tried to argue with Seokjin but the omega waves him off, focused on Taehyung's sparkling eyes.

"End it before your liking towards him becomes something more, something deeper" Seokjin says, and Taehyung looks up at him blinking a lonely tear away from his eye, "I love that kid, I really do. But he has serious trust and commitment issues to resolve first. I truly advice you to break it off with him, and focus on yourself"

Jimin remained silent, looking at Taehyung with a tiny smile. And Taehyung nods his head, dumbly, and weak. He knew Seokjin was right, he was harsh but honest, and he was right. "I will, hyung" he says, feeling Jimin's hand holding his own and squeezing tightly, reassuring him. "I will think about myself first"

"Good" Seokjin smiles at him, accommodate his sunglasses again, "Now let's eat. I'm starving"

--

The sky was dark when Taehyung returned home along with Jimin. He was more silent than usual, and his friend didn't push him to talk, he was just there by his side being wordlessly supportive. He made the choice back at Seokjin's villa, but he was still anxious about facing Jeongguk. The alpha had texted him before that he would be waiting for him outside the building, and Taehyung felt his heart beating faster every time the car turn to arrive to their destination. It was worse than the time he broke up with Bogum, and he wasn't sure the reasons why.

Seokjin told him to break things up with Jeongguk before the thing they have become into something deeper before Taehyung falls deeper. But Taehyung was sure he already fell for Jeongguk, he was now just putting the band aid before the major wound.

The taxi arrives at the building soon after, the first thing Taehyung sees is Jeongguk's Wrangler Jeep parked not so far from the entrance, and the alpha standing outside, leaning against the black vehicle with a hand on the pocket of his leather jacket and the other carelessly scrolling through his phone. Taehyung sighs frustrated, rubbing his face with his hands, while Jimin wraps an arm around his shoulder, pulling him closer in a half hug.

"I know you like him" Jimin whispers to his ear, "But you need to be strong" he says, nodding his head and smiles reassuring Taehyung, "It's the best for you, and maybe for him. Maybe this will help him to man up about his commitment issues"

Taehyung half snorts, half whines, but nods his head, returning the hug to Jimin.

The two omegas get out from the taxi, after paying to the driver. Jeongguk immediately turns his attention to them, probably sensing their scents. Jimin waves happily at the alpha, eyes fading prettily into half-crescent moons, but he didn't move to go and hug Jeongguk as he would usually do, he give two friendly pats on Taehyung's bum and runs inside the building, disappearing from their sight.

Taehyung felt his legs shaking, and he tried to stand straight while watching Jeongguk walking his way with strong steps and looking effortlessly handsome as usual. His mere presence was making everything more difficult for the omega, it was ridiculous how the alpha managed to take his breath away every time they met, like in those fairytales he used to red when he was younger, the same exact tingling feeling when the lead character sees their soulmate.

"Taehyung" he calls, his face hard, jaw hard, and eyes hard, everything about Jeongguk's expression that night was hard, "Hey" he calls again, and this time his voice sounded soothing and soft, like he usually speaks to Taehyung, so comforting. He reaches to cup Taehyung's face with his warm hands, and Taehyung let him, just for a moment he let himself indulge into the warmth of the alpha's touch, leaning in.

"I'm hungry" Taehyung says to him, and Jeongguk smiles, releasing his face and taking his hand instead, easily.

"Tteokbokki?" the alpha asks, tilting his head. Taehyung hums with a nod, letting Jeongguk to pull him towards his jeep by his hand, knowing he was treating him like delicate glass, afraid of a sudden outburst perhaps, or just afraid of losing him.

--

Jeongguk took Taehyung to a place called Tteokbokki Town, in a famous street of food markets and traditional food stalls. The place itself wasn't crowded, only a few people enjoying the spicy steamed rice cakes, still Taehyung would had preferred to be alone with Jeongguk to have their inevitable conversation.

Jeongguk's gaze was constantly on him, and it was making Taehyung squirmy, those intense dark eyes would make anyone nervous, but they shifted from time to time, from intense staring, sharp and dangerous, to big round eyes gleaming with the artificial lights of the diner.

A middle-aged woman comes with their plates, placing them in the table. She bows, smiles and both boys thanks her. The bowl of tteokbokki looked delicious, and as usual Jeongguk didn't waste time into taking a bite, after blowing at the large portion held by his chopsticks. Taehyung smiles at him, of course he does, Jeongguk was cute sometimes, and he likes him like that, cute and real.

"It's delicious" says Jeongguk, a cheek puffed with food, and his eyes big and doe after tasting the rice cakes, "Yours not that spicy, try it"

Taehyung takes his own chopsticks, takes a couple of cylinder rice cakes tinted orange for the sauce, and blows. Jeongguk was watching him, expecting for his approval, so the omegas eats, letting the slightly spicey flavor engulf his mouth, delicious. He hums, raising his brows and looking surprised, "Really good" he says, and Jeongguk grins at him, satisfied, going back to his own plate to eat rather fast, rather hungry.

They eat in silence for a while, Taehyung was decided to let the alpha starts talking, and he waits until Jeongguk had practically devour all the food on his plate to start speaking, and he did. The alpha let his chopsticks on a side, watching at the omega with fondness in his eyes, "I'm sorry" he says, getting Taehyung's attention, "I should have told you"

The omega sniffs, looking down at his half-eaten plate, "Yeah... you should have" he says, and the knot on his stomach that was persevering since the previous day begin to stir, "But I get it"

"You do?"

"I've got time to process everything" says Taehyung, still not looking at Jeongguk in the eyes, too weak to take up his whole attention, "It would be unfair to judge you about something you were educated to do since a young age" he says, lifting his gaze briefly, enough to see the alpha knitting his eyebrows together, "I guess I've been asking you to change a lot of things of yourself to be with me, and that's unfair"

"Hey" Jeongguk calls him, placing a hand on top of Taehyung's, tapping his fingers on his delicate knuckles, "You asks for exclusivity and I told you I would give you that" he says, Taehyung stares at him, a small pout on his face and a hint of sadness in his eyes, "Rut is just a rut"

Taehyung looks away again, eyes setting on Jeongguk's tattooed hand, the black ink covering his knuckles and fingers, and the pretty bracelet made of wooden beads adorning his wrist, "For you" he says, pauses and looks up again to meet the alpha's eyes, "For me is important"

"Peachy baby" Jeongguk begin to say, squeezing his palm on top of his hand, "In our world we use betas for rut and heats" he says, and Taehyung knew that, but no matter how many times he hear it he winced every time, "It sounds cruel but it's the true"

"That's what I heard" says Taehyung, letting Jeongguk touch him with his hand, enjoying the warmth for the moment, just for a while, "Unless you're mated, right?"

"Right" Jeongguk tells, but his face was showing concern, he exhales and shakes his head, "My father..." he begins, pauses and hesitates, but once he see Taehyung's expecting him to elaborate hi continues, "My father would kill me if I spend a rut with an omega" he says, his forehead creased and his voice serious, "He was the one who brought Jaemin to me, and he will probably want to pick a mate for me, he did with my brother... couldn't do it with my sister, and now she's disinherited living in a tiny house in Busan"

"That's actually horrible" Taehyung says, shaking his head, "Not even my grandparents would do that to me"

"Yeah well, my father is very traditional but intransigent" Jeongguk scoffs, and for the first time he was the one to look away, "Always favors business before family" he clears his throat and looks at Taehyung again, his gaze softening, "My grandparent is worse" he shrugs, "High society norms"

"That's why you don't commit?" Taehyung asks, not hiding the scowl of his face, "Because you are just setting on what your father says?"

"No" Jeongguk scoffs again, "Of course not" he says, reaching to Taehyung's face to touch him with his thumb, but the omega flinches back, avoiding the touch, "I don't commit because I like my freedom, you know that" he tells, tapping his fingers against the wooden surface of the table, "I'm living constantly trapped because of my family, my relationship status is the only freedom I have. I like you, peachy, a lot. But for me sex if a form of freedom, to relieve the tension a relationship causes. And I did quit it in order to be with you"

"That's actually really fuck up, you only quit it for like two days before you got a rut and fuck a boy for three days" Taehyung tells him, snaps and glares, not hungry anymore, "But I can't judge you, Jeongguk, I chose not to" he says, smiles weakly at the alpha, "I kind of understand you, at least I'm trying to... but-"

Jeongguk snorts, looking away and taking away his hands from the table, "There's always a but"

"Of course there's a but" Taehyung replies, leaning against the chair, away from the alpha, as much as he could, "For me sex goes along with love" he says, "I'm very thankful I never had sex with Bogum because I'd regret it now" he smiles weakly at Jeongguk and shrugs, "Because I never loved him" his voice was hard, despite the softness he was trying to archive, "But sex without love is just as hollow as your form of thinking"

"Taehyu-"

"I'm not done speaking" Taehyung interrupts, and Jeongguk furrow his eyebrows, pressing his lips in a thin line, his jaw hardening, "We are quite different, too different... and I cannot compromise my self-respect for you, or let myself get hurt because of your way to see life and relationships" he tells him, and Jeongguk keeps watching him, not opening his mouth to reply, just waiting, "I'm not going to force you into changing for me either, you don't deserve that because you've been honest from day one with me and I said yes to your rules"

"Are you getting rid of me?" Jeongguk suddenly asks, his voice sound hard, angry, but Taehyung could hear a slight tremble in the end of his question.

"No" Taehyung replies quickly, fingers playing with one of the three button of his sleeve in a nervous matter, "No, I'm not" he says again, "But I can't do this anymore, Jeongguk... I really like you, you know I do... and that's why I don't want to continue this casual thing between us, everything is just... too much for me"

"That doesn't make sense" Jeongguk scoffs, a half grin half scowl appearing on his face, and he looks quite in disbelief.

"Jeongguk" says Taehyung, feeling his heart tight against his chest, he didn't like to see Jeongguk that way, it make him feel like the bad guy, and he wonder how the alpha had also the ability to make everything on his favor., but he needed to be strong, he wanted to be strong, "Please let's go back to be just friends" he says, his own voice shaky, "No feelings involve, no hearts to break"

Jeongguk didn't hide his scowl anymore, his eyebrows knitted together, and his forehead creased, two digits pulling at his ear in an anxious manner, and he snaps "You can't go back from going out with someone to be just friends again!" his voice was a pitch higher, and he immediately draw attention of the few people eating in the diner.

"Jeongguk" Taehyung scolds, "Friends is the only thing we are, friends who kiss" he says, and Jeongguk sags in his seat, his face falling, just like his eyes.

"We can still be friends who kiss"

"No, no Jeongguk"

"But baby" Jeongguk says, lowering his voice and smiling at Taehyung, one of his charming smiles that always managed to get Taehyung to his feet, "I know how much you like when I kiss you" he utters, dangerously closer, both of his hands going to take one of Taehyung's, gently and warm, and intertwining his fingers with him, "Or when I hold your hand"

"Stop it" Taehyung whines, shakes his head and moves his hand away from the alpha, "I can't keep things casual" he blurts, looking up and meeting the alpha's eyes, "I want a boyfriend, not a friend with benefits, and if you're not ready to give me that it's over"

"I can't" Jeongguk tells, retracting his hand too, and sighing loudly, "You know I can't"

"I know" Taehyung mutters, looking away one more time, he wanted to get out of there, the cold food in front of him looking tasteless every minute it passed, "We are better off as friends..."

Jeongguk nods, eyes narrowing while looking at Taehyung, he clicks his tongue against his cheek and let his jaw tighten, then he calls the waiter to pay, and the silence between them was becoming unbearable, not tense just unbearable, especially when Jeongguk looked like Taehyung has just commit the biggest treason towards him and not the other way around, and that simple attitude was helping the omega to assure himself that he was making the right decision.

They exit the diner, Taehyung feeling a hollowness in his chest, and so uneasy. Jeongguk wasn't looking at him, he walks in the direction of his jeep and Taehyung just follows, until they reach the vehicle and the alpha hastily turns around making him flinch, and he looks exasperated again, staring intensely at him with those dark eyes that were alluring as much as evil. 

"I can't be your friend either" says Jeongguk, breathes air, and almost growl.

Taehyung made an effort to not flinch again, he licks his lips and doesn't take his eyes away from the alpha, unconsciously he begin to release his soothing scent, peach blossom, "Please try..."

"No"

"Jeongguk" Taehyung calls, steps closer to the alpha, "You owe me that at least" he says, firmly, "Please?"

"Is this your way to force me into a relationship?" the alpha snaps again, his scent turning burn, just like those times when he was angry at the groove, burnt amber.

Taehyung furrow his eyebrows in disbelief. "Of course not" he tells, shaking his head, and Jeongguk looks away from him, hands in the pockets of his leather jacket, and his scent was too much for Taehyung to handle, "Jeongguk" he calls, stepping further and grabbing a piece of fabric of his leather jacket. Jeongguk ignores him, "Jeongguk you can't be angry at me"

"I'm not angry at you" Jeongguk mutters, still not looking at Taehyung, "I'm angry at myself"

"Jeongguk..."

"I'll try ok?" The alpha snaps, turns around and cups Taehyung's face, "For you" he utters, more softly, and he looked really distressed, it was making Taehyung equally distressed, "Can I have a kiss goodbye before we go back at being friends?"

"No" Taehyung shakes his head, but he doesn't move away from the alpha, or push him away when he leans in, still cupping his face, "Hey" he tries, but Jeongguk leans in and kiss him, it was a soft and brief kiss, no tongue involve, just soft lips pressing together, and as soon as it came it was gone. Taehyung pulls away, licking his lips, "You can't do that"

"I'm sorry" says Jeongguk, sniffing and backing away, leaning against the jeep.

"I'm sorry too..." says Taehyung, feeling tired, exhausted, the whole conversation was emotional draining for him, especially because he just gave up on trying with the boy he likes, but it was for the best, he was making the right choice he keeps telling himself.

When Jeongguk drove him back home, Taehyung felt like time had stopped for a moment. It was starting to rain, and the night looked gloom, just like how he felt inside. He never turned to look at Jeongguk, rather spend the drive counting raindrops on his window, and Jeongguk didn't say anything either, his burnt amber scent enveloping the air in the jeep, it was troubling Taehyung to the point he had to open the window and let the raindrops to fall on his face just to breath fresh air.

The drive was short, Taehyung said goodbye to Jeongguk and got out of the jeep. Standing under the light rain he watched the black vehicle takes off, fast and careless, and he wonder if they could actually be just friends, they never were, not truly, not when both felt that unveiling attraction towards the other. But he wanted to try, and maintain his heart intact, attach back the little piece of it that broke the day Jeongguk deceived him.

--

One of the few things that Jeongguk really enjoyed and put all his passion into was training, training mixed martial arts and boxing. He was close to be obsessed with muscular strength and how to use it against others, or at least that was the perception most of the people who went to see him fight thought about him, but it was nothing like that. Jeongguk worked hard to be respected by other people, to be respected by his family, by his father. His father had told him several times that boxing was a disgrace, that he was wasting his time by fighting like a brute and not working on the family business, making money by punching others, and illegally to make it worse. Jeon Jaehyun was a tough man, and he was the one to save Jeongguk from justice more than a few times, making sure to call him a disgrace after. But Jeongguk, since he was a child, longs for his father's approval.

He was sweaty, his muscles burning and aching every time he jumps harder. He was working on his cardio, to endure the fights better, even when he was already in the perfect shape. His friends, Yugyeom and Mingyu were in the gym too, busy with dumbbells and the machines.

"Guk" Yugyeom yells from the machine he was working on his arms, "Stop jumping the rope, get on with the kettlebells now"

Jeongguk breaths heavily, stopping and grabbing a towel to dry all the sweat from his nape and forehead. "I need to improve my cardio"

"No you don't" Yugyeom tells him, serious and demanding, something common in him when he trains with Jeongguk. "You need to get tougher. Go work on your arms"

Jeongguk scoffs, taking a bottle of water and gulping the liquid down with neediness, he swallows and glares at the other alpha, "When I fired my trainer and suggested you should train me I didn't expect for you to take it so seriously"

Yugyeom rolls his eyes, a wide grin on his face, "I'm taking good care of my champ" he tells, all smug and teasing, "This season's payment is doubled from last time"

Jeongguk raises his eyebrows, nodding, it was a lot of money, more than what he does on his family law firm, because despite what the common of rich people thought about him, he had to ear the money he had. His father didn't spoil him, neither paid for his spending. He provided with money for college and money for the apartment, nothing else.

"I need a sparring partner" Jeongguk says, walking towards the different sized kettlebells to start lifting, "I'm fucking tired of punching a bag"

"No one wants to act like a dummy for you, Guk" It was Mingyu who spoke, from the other end of the gym, lifting weights, "You have no fucking mercy" he teases, and Jeongguk scoffs again, not in the mood for anything but training hard, "You've been irritable all morning"

"Whatever" replies Jeongguk, taking a kettlebell in each hand and lifting them with ease.

"Work on your breathing" Yugyeom scolds, standing up from the machine and walking towards Jeongguk to help him with the times and posture, "Everything in training is about rhythm, you fucking know that"

He did, of course Jeongguk did. He boxes with rhythm and strength, rhythm was everything when having a fight. Jeongguk sets the rhythm, and he wins the fight, if he let his opponent set his own rhythm he is fucked up. That was his only struggle against BI, the guy always set his own rhythm, and Jeongguk had to penetrate that rhythm in order to win, make it his own, make him fight his own fight, and that's an easy win.

"There you go" Yugyeom grins, thumbs up and watching Jeongguk, "Train until it hurts like hell"

"It already hurts like hell"

"Train until you know it'll hurt until tomorrow" he says, crossing his arms against his chest, his black tank top not letting the sweat to look translucent as it did on Jeongguk's white one, "So Gukkie" he begins, a smirk on his face, "I've read Peachy's article"

Jeongguk abruptly drops his kettlebells, a vein on his neck looking prominent and his jaw tightening, "It's good" he says, breath heavily and drying his sweat with the white tank top.

Mingyu lifts his eyebrow from his place, "Trouble in paradise?" he asks, deviousness in his tone of voice, "Is that why you've been grumpy?"

Yugyeom opens his eyes, slighting knitting his brows together and looking at Jeongguk who growls at them, annoyed, "No" he says, "Family drama" he says, and Mingyu was about to tease him further but Jeongguk was quick to cut him off, "Drop it if you don't want me to use you as a fucking dummy"

Mingyu lifts his hands in defense, the same annoying smirk plastered on his face, "Chill man" he says, and stands up, "I'm done" he says, winks, and leaves towards the restroom.

"He's an ass" Yugyeom tells Jeongguk, "Don't pay attention to him"

"I never do" Jeongguk replies, resuming his work with the kettlebells. He repeats it ten more times and switch to a slam ball. There was something incredible satisficing into slamming the heavy ball because it help him to improve his strength and to release the frustration stored inside, release his anger. He wanted to break the damn ball against the mat.

"JK" Yugyeom calls, shaking his head, "Drop that shit, if you look too buffed in a suit your father will kill you" he utters, and Jeongguk sighs, annoyed, dropping the slam ball, and beginning to do some shoulder slumps to relax his muscles, "I'm your best friend" Yugyeom begin to says, his face not hiding the concern for his friend, "You can tell me if it is about family drama"

Jeongguk tucks his chin towards his chest, dropping his shoulders and bringing his chest slightly forwards, "No" he says, pulling his shoulders back, raising his chin, and lifting his chest while arching his back slightly, "It's not about my fucking family" he breathes, "Taehyung wants to be just friends with me, but he's been blatantly ignoring me"

Yugyeom looks surprised for a minute, and then he scoffs, laughing at Jeongguk, "You're angry because pretty Peachy friendzoned you? I thought you two were hooking up"

"We were" says Jeongguk with a groan, hands of his hips and spreading his legs beyond shoulder-width apart, circling his hips, "But he met Jaemin"

"Oh"

"The idiot opened the door thinking it was the delivery guy" Jeongguk tells him, moving his hips clockwise in a circle, then counterclockwise, "But it was Tae"

"Oh fuck man" Yugyeom says, with an almost pitiful expression on him, "You're fucked up"

"I am" Jeongguk groans again, repeating the movement with his arms extended out to his sides, "And now I feel like I just got dumped" he says, scoffing and stopping his movements, "And I wasn't even in a relationship with him"

Yugyeom laughs, walking closer to the other alpha and patting his sweaty back, "Ah you've got it bad, dude, really bad. It's so fucking funny"

"Fucking hilarious" Jeongguk rolls his eyes, "But I really didn't mean to hurt him"

"But you still did" Yugyeom scoffs, grabbing two bottles of water and handing one to Jeongguk, "He is obviously not the type of hooking up with someone like you do, man. If I were lucky enough to have someone like him I would date him and brag about him all the time"

Jeongguk stares at him but doesn't say anything. He knows Yugyeom was right, Taehyung was unique, exceptional enough to take him on dates, spend time with him, and kiss him, but not enough to devote himself completely to him, no one was enough for Jeongguk, and he believed no one would never be appropriate enough for him to face that irrational fear of commit and succumb to his feelings, and become vulnerable for someone.

Being in a commit relationship with Taehyung would mean to expose himself to the point of become vulnerable against him, and vulnerability was something his father taught him to loathe, being vulnerable meant to be weak, love was a weakness. Jeongguk was not weak, he was taught to be the strongest alpha since he was a kid, he couldn't let himself be weak, that would be shameful for his family. He needed to be merciless because of the weight he carried on his shoulders by being the youngest of the Jeons.

Taehyung was gorgeous, fun, smart, and Jeongguk loves to spend time with him, loves to kiss him too. But at the same time Taehyung made him feel vulnerable, and that scared the hell out of him. So part of him was actually relief the omega ended things with him, to avoid exposing himself, too dangerous territory.

But it has been just a week, one week since Taehyung asked him to be friends, and yet the omega has been refusing to go out with him, not even up for a friendly lunch. Taehyung was ignoring him, and that was getting Jeongguk even more exasperated, desperate even. But he haven't miss him yet, he did think about Taehyung every day, but he kept telling himself he didn't miss him, not yet.

Mingyu appears again in the gym, phone in his hand a smirk on his face, "Jackson got us in the list for the Coma Club" he says, shaking the phone of his hand, "Battle of DJs and lots of hot chicks"

"What DJ? Yoongi?" asks Jeongguk.

Mingyu wiggles his eyebrows, "August D is one of the headliners" he says, "Are you going, JK?"

Jeongguk hesitates, he had family dinner the next day like every other Sunday, but if Yoongi was putting music for the night the possibilities of Taehyung going to see him were above average. Yugyeom seems to be thinking the same because the alpha was grinning at him, giving his thumps up. "Yeah" says Jeongguk, "Let's hit the club tonight"

--

The street lights of Gangnam hurled in pools of garish orange, yellow and red to Jeongguk's eyes, nothing new, nothing different. They pass the Gangnam Station, tons of bars, clubs and restaurants in there, but it wasn't topnotch, not yet. They reach Sinsa Station, the hotspot for the high society youth, home of the hottest clubs and lounges, only overpriced establishments. Yugyeom was driving his electric blue sport car, just to look hotter. Jeongguk wasn't in the mood for driving that night, and he wasn't expecting to go home with Yugyeom either, it was a tradition for them to pick up omegas and left the club with them. Except that night Jeongguk was only there for one specific omega.

Yugyeom parks his BMW in their reserved spot, lined up in the street near the club along with other luxurious cars. He recognized Seokjin's Lexus, and Yoongi's huge ram truck, the possibilities of seeing Taehyung that night grew for him.

The Coma Club was basically a playground for the rich kids of High Society, always busy and always crowded by young, attractive, and very well-off people. Jeongguk follows his friends, skipping the long line of persons waiting to get inside, and greeting the two beta bouncers in the entrance. The club had two floors, an underground level and a rooftop. The latest was the VIP area with private tables, but the battle of DJs were in the underground. They wander around the main floor, EDM music playing loudly and laser lights making everything wilder, but nothing was especial enough to draw Jeongguk's attention. He reaches the stairs that leaded towards the basement, followed by his friends, despite Mingyu's attempts of ditching the hip-hop party and just head to the rooftop.

There was another bouncer guarding the underground level. They were in the list, and that meant free access to every stage in the club, so they pass with no problem. It was crowded, of course it was, the most popular DJs were performing tonight, the booths were full, just like the center area, and there was an alpha girl playing music at the moment, some of her followers moving to the beat of her tunes.

"The guys are there" says Yugyeom, pointing with his chin to the biggest booth in the place, "Let's get some beers before"

"I'll go" Jeongguk offers himself, wanting to walk towards the bar, which was situated in the side, it would help him to have a better view of the floor. The alpha didn't wait for his friend to reply, and he just walks towards the bar area, expecting to see his other friends, expecting to see Taehyung.

The bartenders were only females, wearing cropped shirts with the club logo on them. One with short platinum blonde hair and huge hoop earrings got closer to Jeongguk, who was now sitting in one of the bar stools, "Hey JK" she greets, a grin on her face, "It's been a while".

Jeongguk shrugs, divert his eyes from the short blonde girl to look around the club, legs spread in the stool and his arms relaxed on the countertop, he looked like he owned the place, "You're not performing tonight?" he asks, searching through the booths to see any familiar faces, but the lights were playing with neon green and purple colors, and it was becoming difficult to recognize any person.

"No" the girl says, cleaning the surface of the countertop with a cloth, "I'm bartending tonight"

Jeongguk didn't care really, he was just being nice with someone he at least had slept more than four times in the past, under the ecstasy of alcohol and recreational drugs of course, she wasn't his type. He turns again to face her, her small and sharp eyes were shamelessly eyeing him, along with a teasing grin in her face, "Give me three beers" he says, "You know the kind"

She rolls her eyes, turning around to go get the bottles. Jeongguk scans the club with his eyes again, knitting his eyebrows because there wasn't a trait of Taehyung and the others, he was about to give in and text Taehyung, no caring his last three messages were left on read. "Here ya go, pretty boy" says the bartender girl, "Looking for someone?" she asks. Jeongguk looks at her, cocking an eyebrow and showing her his credit card, "You can pay before you go. I'll make you a bill list"

"Thanks Soyeon" says Jeongguk, saving his card, "When is Yoongi performing?"

Soyeon smiles, "August D is the last one to go" she says, "You know how it is", Jeongguk nods, eyes going back to look at the crowd and the booths, "He's in one of the private booths with his friends in case you're wondering"

Jeongguk wanted to ask more while being discreet about it, nonchalantly, because Soyeon was well known in the scene, and she talks, and she could easily make a gossip about it, "Who is with him?"

Soyeon cocks an eyebrow at him, her toothy grin appearing again, "Everyone but Namjoon" she says, and he feels relief, Namjoon wasn't there to court Tae, or to make him laugh, or to exchange facts about their ridiculous similar tastes, "You're smiling like a creep"

Jeongguk snorts, opening a bottle of beer and drinking, the malty cold liquid instantly cooling him down, "Whatever" he says, "Was someone you don't know with them?"

She looks at him incredulous, "Just ask if you want to know about a specific someone"

"You're mouthy"

"Not with my friends"

"I'm not your friend"

"Perhaps" Soyeon grins, reaching with her finger to trace Jeongguk's bicep, "But we had shared the bed a couple of times, pretty boy"

Jeongguk chuckles, cockily grinning at her, "I seriously need to raise my standards"

"Now you're being just an asshole" the small blonde says, rolling her eyes and supporting herself by her elbows on the bar counter, "So" she smirks again, "Tall, blonde and gorgeous? Very out of your league?"

"He's not out of my league" Jeongguk was fast to reply, glaring at the cunning girl, "No one is out of my fucking league"

"So sensitive Jeonggukie"

"Fuck you"

"My shift ends in two hours"

Jeongguk snorts again, and returns the smirk, "You may be average looking, but you're pretty chill" he says, opening a bottle of beer and raising it to her before drinking, "Cheers" he says, standing up from the bar stool.

"Asshole" Soyeon replies, sharp but with no animosity between them. It was mostly likely for her to be sassy with Jeongguk and receive more sass in return.

Jeongguk texts Jin, he would play it safe with Jin, he always did because Kim Seokjin had an exceptionally soft spot for him. He grins when the omega replied to him with a 'Private booth #1", and walks smoothly towards there, forgetting about his friends and the beers he was supposed to bring them.

The private booths were always reserved for the performing artists or for celebrities, and the area was slightly away from the stage. Jeongguk takes another drink from his beer, holding the two other with ease in his other hand, walking confidently towards the booth. He opens the door with a kick because his hands were busy, not because he was dramatic, and he falls silent.

Everyone in the big round booth turns to look at him, falling silent for several moments too. But thankfully Seokjin was soon standing up and waving at Jeongguk obviously drunk, "Gukkie! Come hug your hyung!"

Jeongguk smiles, a tight smile, and briefly look at the opposite side of Seokjin, Taehyung was there, and he felt his heart skipping a beat when their eyes met, he quickly looks away to not make it too obvious, "Hey" says Jeongguk" looking at Seokjin, but referring to everyone in the booth really.

"Jeonggukie" Jimin's high pitched voice echoed in the room, "You came to see Yoongi?"

Jeongguk sits down next to Seokjin, and looks at Jimin who was wrapped in the arms of Yoongi, something new to Jeongguk's eyes, they were never affectionate in public, Yoongi always tried to hide his relationship with Jimin, and most of the times Jeongguk had to be the shoulder for Jimin to cry and whine on, "No" he half lies, "I didn't know you guys were coming"

Yoongi stares at him, expressionless. Jeongguk expected his hostility, he hurt his cousin, of course Yoongi was going to be hostile, and he kind of expected him to openly curse him, but he didn't, he just stared. Taehyung was staring at him too, and he looked more shocked than mad, or sad, his pretty eyes were round and surprised, and his lips were slightly curl downward, almost forming a pout. Jeongguk smiles, unconsciously smiles at the sight of him.

"There's a charity event in two weeks" Seokjin tells him, distracting him, and everyone seems to return to whatever they were talking before Jeongguk invaded their space, "Remember the guys I used to go fishing with?"

No, Jeongguk did not remember them, "Yeah" he says, just to let Seokjin be happy and continue talking, but his attention return to Taehyung. And Taehyung was no longer looking at him, he was just happily talking with Hoseok, and the booth was too big for the group and that didn't let Jeongguk hear anything.

"We could go to the Country Club too" Seokjin says, more loudly, a hand hitting Jeongguk's expose knee, "Did you fell? You have a cut on your knee" he says, confidently pulling further apart the ripped part of the jeans Jeongguk was wearing.

Jeongguk looks down at his knee, and effectively he had a dark bruise and a cut, "No" he says, rubbing the bruise with his hand, "I probably hurt myself training" he says. Seokjin proceed to scold him for training too hard. Jeongguk lifts his gaze, and his eyes met Taehyung once again, this time the omega didn't glance away, he actually looked very worried for Jeongguk.

He still cared, no matter what happened between them, Taehyung still cared for him, of course he did. Taehyung was sweet, and innocent, and kind, and the type of boy who would scold Jeongguk for not being careful, but at the same would take care of the bruise with gentleness and kisses.

Taehyung blushes after making eye contact for more than a minute, Jeongguk realized he was blushing just because he knew how the omega looked when he did, he was used to make him blush, Taehyung looked prettier blushing, his cheeks turned a peachy color, with gold shimmer on, beautiful. And he was now fidgeting with his fingers, playing with something Jeongguk couldn't see because of the table, trying to focus on whatever Hoseok was telling him, it was endearing.

"Stop smiling like an idiot" Jimin's voice along with a piece of lime falling near his beer distracted him. Jeongguk looks up at the smaller omega and rolls his eyes because Jimin was smirking knowingly at him and wriggling his eyebrows. In that table, Park Jimin was the one who knew him better, after all they've been friends since they were kids, back in Busan. Jimin whispers something to Yoongi and stands up from his seat to walk and sit next to Jeongguk, "You are an idiot"

Jeongguk scoffs, moving a bit to make more space for the omega, "Thank you, Jims" he says, "Are you here to curse me out?"

"Of course not" Jimin says to him, not quitting the smirk on his face, "I'm here to help you with Tae" he says, and Jeongguk blinks at him, slightly creasing his forehead, "You look lovesick" he says, shaking his head.

Jeongguk scoffs, "I'm not lovesick"

"Your eyes don't lie, Jeonggukie" says Jimin, playing with the straw that was inside his pink cocktail, "Tae helped me out with Yoongi, I was thinking in returning the favor"

"Good for you" says Jeongguk, "But I don't need your help, Jims" he utters, drinking from his beer and feeling caught between Jimin and Seokjin who were sharing knowing glances.

Jimin pats his shoulder, harder than usual, "Just go over there and make conversation" he says, "I'll take care of Hobi" he says, and immediately the omega starts whining to Hoseok to come play with him and Seokjin to a drinking game, Hoseok was an enthusiast, so he cheerfully agreed to it, trying to pull Taehyung with him but he declines, just staying in his seat.

Jeongguk stands up, walks around the booth and plop himself next to Taehyung, not caring about the sharp look Yoongi was giving him, or how the omega slightly moves away from him, just a little. Jeongguk sits comfortable, beer in hand and legs spread apart, "You've been ignoring me" he says, taking another sip from his now not so cold beer.

Taehyung glances over him, he looked pretty, make-up on probably courtesy of Jimin, and the shadow made his eyes prettier under the green and purple lights of the club. Jeongguk would choose him bare face though, Taehyung was a natural beauty to him, more than his attractive exterior what made him beautiful was his persona, like a walking poem and a true work of art.

"I've told you I've been busy with my classes" says Taehyung, his voice coming out soft, and slightly shy, "We can have lunch next week if you want" he says, but he doesn't sound sure. Jeongguk was sure he was just saying that to avoid confrontation.

"You told me to try and be friends with you" says Jeongguk, brows furrows and getting closer to the omega, just for the sake of smelling his scent up close again, "You wanted to be friends"

"I know" Taehyung says, looking away, a hand nervously playing with the chocker he was wearing, "It's just that..." he begins, pauses, squirms a bit next to Jeongguk, and speaks again, "It's hard" he tells him, eyes meeting Jeongguk's again, "...To be friends with you"

"Then let's go back to what we were before that" Jeongguk says, smiles hopefully at the omega, reaching to touch his hair and tuck some strands behind his ear.

"No, Jeongguk" Taehyung shakes his head, but doesn't move away from Jeongguk's lingering hand on his hair, "I can't do that" he tells, "And I think I can't be friends with you either" he says, eyes fixated on Jeongguk's knee cut, "At least not yet"

"Taehyung..."

"Are you okay?" he asks, still looking at the wound, hesitating into touching or not. He doesn't, Taehyung just stays still, avoiding him again, and Jeongguk retracts his hand.

"It's just a cut" says Jeongguk, his chest feeling heavy. It was frustrating for him, everything was frustrating when it came to Taehyung. He wanted the omega, and he knew the omega wanted him back, then why he had to go and do everything so difficult?

Simplicity was nice, Jeongguk likes simple things, like hooking up with someone good enough to caught his attention, have fun, and then repeat it with someone else, no strings attached, just pleasure and simplicity. But Taehyung keeps denying it to him, keeps rejecting him, he was making everything hard, everything difficult, and Jeongguk was exasperated.

Taehyung was sweet, kind, smart, and enjoyable but he was stubborn, so stubborn, and perhaps Soyeon was right, and it was because Kim Taehyung was indeed out of his league, he wasn't the kind of boy who would leave anything in order to be with Jeongguk, wouldn't let himself become a toy, much less to let others play with him. And he was demanding too, always demanding Jeongguk to change, to drop things he enjoyed just for the sake of being together.

Jeongguk should just leave the booth and go have fun with his alpha friends, pick up some pretty omega willing to be filthy for him and forget about Taehyung. That would be the easiest choice, the right choice for him, but Kim Taehyung was constantly invading his head and it was driving him crazy, especially when the omega was sitting next to him with his alluring scent and Jeongguk wanted to just lean in and kiss him.

"Don't hurt yourself" says Taehyung, with his soft deep voice, so mellow it felt like honey to anyone's ears, Jeongguk would prefer him to be rude with him, to be angry, not sweet-tempered, that was only making everything worse for him, "Be careful with your training, don't push yourself that hard..."

Jeongguk would usually reply with a witty remark, a playful joke or by flirting with him, but Taehyung was genuinely concerned for a fucking cut. Jeongguk lost count of how many cuts and bruises he got since he start training boxing and martial arts when he was fifteen, and yet this pretty boy who was hurt and upset because of him managed to care. It was pulling the strings of his heart.

Taehyung was waiting for his reply, and Jeongguk opens his mouth, he wanted to say how much he misses him, how he was the only one stuck in his head since Taehyung ended with him, but he hesitates, and suddenly Taehyung was looking behind him, towards the door, Jeongguk also turns around, and the same dreadful jealousy from the time in the Halloween Party attacked him merciless. Namjoon was there, greeting at everyone, and looking stupidly handsome with his grey hair slicked back, a denim jacket and tight black jeans.

Jeongguk was possessive, yes, it was in his alpha nature to be possessive, his own father taught him that whatever he wanted he could make it his, but being jealous was something new for him, he never had reasons to be jealous before, and now he hated it. Namjoon tries to sit near Taehyung of course, but Jeongguk moved before, letting the corner free for him, Taehyung moves too, keeping his distance from him. Jimin and Jin were not so discreetly staring at him and laughing.

Taehyung tried to avoid him the rest of the time they were sitting on that private booth, and Jeongguk sulked every time. He was being childish, he knew, but didn't care, especially when Namjoon attempted to make conversation with Taehyung, Jeongguk would interrupt something sardonic, making everything uncomfortable. That lasted until Yoongi had to get on the stage and play music, so everyone were switching towards a booth near it to see him properly.

Jeongguk stands up, grabbing his leather jacket that he had take off somewhere between annoying Taehyung and drinking beer, and when he was about to walk out Taehyung grabbed him by his wrist pulling him towards a side. Jeongguk was surprised, and Taehyung was angry.

"You're acting childish" says Taehyung, voice husky and his brows knitted together showing his annoyance, "Stop your bratty attitude"

Jeongguk snorts, shrugging his jacket on again, "I was being humorous" he says, grins to make the atmosphere between them more comfortable.

"You were being annoying" Taehyung utters, crossing his arms against his chest, and Jeongguk wanted to kiss his pout and squeeze his cheeks, "You think it's funny?" he asks making Jeongguk recognizes he was smiling at the omega, fondly, again.

"Baby" Jeongguk calls, hands reaching to Taehyung's waist, and the omega instantly put his hands on the alpha's chest to avoid him to pull him closer, "Baby come on, let's forget about everything and get out of here" he says, almost pleading, almost unbelieving how close to begging he was, "I know you want to..."

Taehyung was looking at him, keeping his lips sealed, and his big almond-like eyes looking sad. Jeongguk slightly frowns, one hand leaving the omega's waist and going to reach his face, softly rubbing a thumb on the apple of his cheek, something that had become common for him to do. Taehyung closes his eyes, leaning against his touch for a minute, but then he was pulling away, shaking his head and looking sadder, his sweet alluring scent turning sour.

"Please leave me alone" Taehyung mutters, eyes sparkling with tears, and Jeongguk felt his heart sinking. He never wanted to hurt him, he didn't like to see him sad, but he really didn't know what to do or what to say, to make Taehyung feel better.

"Tae-"

"Please, Jeongguk" Taehyung says again, sniffing, and standing straighter, "I need to get you out of my head and you're making everything harder for me"

Jeongguk was taken aback, hands falling lifeless on his sides, and just staring at the pretty omega that caught his attention since the first time he saw him standing in the line for candies in that movie theater, "I'm sorry" was the only thing Jeongguk managed to mutter, Taehyung sniffs again, nods, and turns around leaving him alone.

Jeongguk was left all alone in that private room, and it felt horrible emptier because Taehyung was the one to left him there, and he wanted Taehyung to be in it with him. He realizes, he was strong on the outside, but inside he was just a coward too afraid to face his true feelings.

Just that, a coward.

--

Jeongguk leaves the club right after, feeling empty, with a horrible hollowness in his chest. He was terrified of falling for Taehyung, fucking terrified, especially when he felt like someone had stomp over his heart by seeing the omega so sad because of him. He leans against a concrete wall with a whirlwind of annoying thoughts in his head, people walking around were just a blur for him, everything was a blur when he was so emotionally exhausted.

"Want a smoke?" someone says, and Jeongguk lifts his head to see Soyeon in front of him, wearing a dark fluffy coat too big on her, and smoking a large thin cigarette. He nods, wanting to smoke just to ease the stress he was feeling, "Let me guess" Soyeon says, taking a hit of her cigarette, "Pretty omega boy rejected you"

"I don't want to talk about it" says Jeongguk, putting the white thin cigarette between his lips and leaning in towards the small blonde girl to let her light it up, he inhales, closes his eyes, and let the ashy taste engulf his mouth and throat.

Soyeon laughs, but it's not teasing, she is just looking at him. "Want to go to my apartment?" she asks, cocking an eyebrow.

Jeongguk knows what she wants, and he knows she lives close to the club in a shabby apartment that was too expensive just because it was in Gangnam. He had been there already more than enough times because Soyeon was fun in bed. She wasn't the prettiest girl he had been with, not even close to Won, but she was a nice companion, and she was one of the few girls he could keep a decent conversation with, aside from fucking.

He looks at her, taking another hit from the cigarette and blowing smoke into the air, "Yeah" he says, "Let's get the fuck out of here"

He decides to stay away from Taehyung, to forget about him and continue with the lifestyle he was so fond of. In that way, no one would get hurt, and Taehyung wouldn't cry because of him ever again. At least that was what he thought he wanted, like fucking Soyeon and forget about Taehyung. But nothing was working on him, not even the girl on her knees while he was shirtless and with his jeans on his ankles, sitting on her bed.

Soyeon sighs, standing up from the floor and looking at him almost with pity, "You can imagine I'm him" she says with a shrug, "Just think I am your boy so you can get it up"

Jeongguk frowns, scoffing loudly, "I'm just tired" he says, tries to grab the waistband of his jeans to pull them up, "I don't need to think about anyone to get it up"

The blonde girl shakes her head with an amused smile plastered on, "Jeongguk" she calls, "I want to get laid tonight" she says, getting on her knees again, "So fucking imagine I'm that omega and fuck me yeah?"

Jeongguk knits his brows, but he nods, closes his eyes and imagine Taehyung on his knees, gorgeous Taehyung looking so innocent yet devious on his knees, and it works. He sleeps with Soyeon, gives her an orgasm, but in his mind she was always Taehyung, Taehyung moaning, Taehyung taking him, Taehyung, Taehyung...

It clicked something in Jeongguk's thick brain. He was utterly fucked up for Kim Taehyung.

"Fuck" Jeongguk curses, pants on and still shirtless, legs spread apart as he was sitting in the edge of the bed, elbows on his thighs and his head buried under his hands, "Fuck, I'm fucking fucked up"

Soyeon laughs, she was dressed already, in some weird red pajamas that would kill anyone's boner. "Eloquent" she laughs, "How does it feel?" she asks, wriggling her eyebrows at him, "To be in love with someone who doesn't want to be with you"

"I'm not in love" He spats back, like he was defending himself for a nearly aberrant accusation.

"You are falling in love, JK" she says, smirks again, "And it feels like your fucking heart is being rip out of your chest. You, my friend, had been poisoned" she grins, walking towards the small bathroom she had on her studio apartment, and turns to look at him briefly, "Thanks for the fuck. Now get out"

He leaves the apartment like a suffering soul, really. Soyeon was wrong in some things she said to him, but when she talked about love something connected in his brain, and he was once again scared to death, horrible terrified. Love? He didn't even know what love is. Was it love thinking about Taehyung while being with someone else? Or feeling his heart being constantly stab when he thought about Taehyung with another guy, a guy like Namjoon smiling his stupid dimples to him and offering charming anecdotes.

Jeongguk groans, pulling his hair in frustration, not caring if some of the few people walking alone in the night looked at him like he was gone mad. Perhaps he was, mad and deeply fucked up because you can't escape love, do you?

Love had three stages according to a book he read when he was a teenager; lust, attraction and attachment, and he accepts he was on the first two stages, but he now all he wanted was to desperately evade the last one.

Jeongguk wanted to try escaping from falling in love. He was going to try.