XXXI.                                           Heartbreak Weather

      Thalia should've caught it sooner. It had been weeks. Weeks since the right, weeks of sleepless nights and nightmares, and yet she still missed the signs. She'd seen this film before and she didn't like the ending. Her daughter was in pain, she would always be in pain, and she needed to find a way to help her. Odessa's heart rate was dangerously low. That's what the doctors told her. She was severely malnourished and dehydrated. Thalia sat by the hospital bed and cradled her daughter's hand in hers. She watched her sleep like she used to when she was a baby. Only this time, her cheeks were sunken and she was hot and cold. The bags under her eyes were blue and purple. She didn't look like herself.

"I'm sorry, baby girl. I'm so sorry you've been going through this." Thalia cried.

"Thalia?" It was Oliver. 

"Sir, you can't be here—"

She held her hand up, stopping the nurse. "No, no, please. This is her brother. He needs to be here." She pleaded.

The nurse looked between them with slight hesitation. Ultimately, she nodded and sent the mother a smile before leaving the room.

Oliver quickly hugged the woman. "I'm sorry thalia. I didn't know what was happening." He blurted out with watery eyes.

"No one did, Oliver. It's okay." Thalia said and rubbed his back.

He looked at Odessa and slowly pulled out of the hug. He sat in the chair and grabbed her limp hand. "Hey, Butterfly." Thalia placed her hands on his shoulders. "You know, sometimes I really hate you. I hate how you're so fucking nice to everyone. How you think everyone's feelings and health are more important than yours. You broke your promise. But let's be honest, you could murder someone and i'd still love you. Because you're my sister." He rambled and wiped his tears.

Thalia wiped her stray tears away.

"I'm not going to judge you. I'm not going over overload you with questions. I'll just be by your side. You're stuck with me for life, unfortunately."

Hailey and Grayson came rushing into the hospital room. She was crying, hysterically. "I'm sorry. I knew what was happening and I didn't say anything. She told me not to." She sobbed.

Thalia quickly walked up to her and cupped her face. "Don't apologize. It's okay. She's okay."

Grayson sniffled and hugged the woman tightly. The teenagers surrounded her in a group hug. These were her kids. They grew up with her and her daughter. She watched them become teenagers, watched their lives change for better and worse. She loved them like they were her own. "I've known all of you since you were kids. I love you so so much. We protect each other. We listen to each other and we don't judge; we guide. So I beg of you, if any of you are struggling with the events that happened, please come to me. I can't handle another phone call."

"Don't worry, Tal. No more hiding." Oliver promised.

As if things couldn't get any worse, Miguel was laying in a hospital bed just down the hall from Odessa. He had no idea what was going on. He was completely clueless. Thalia had to tell him. He was going to find out one way or another. She walked into his room and he turned to see her. "Thalia." He said with a tired smile.

"Hey, sweetheart. How are you doing?" She greeted him.

"The surgery went well, but, doctor says I might not walk again. They say it's hard to tell right now." Miguel explained with a frown on his face.

She shook her head. "Nah, I don't believe that. If anyone can do it,  it's you." She said and patted his hand.

"That's what Sensei said."

Thalia frowned again and rocked back and forth on her heels. "Look, Miguel, there's something you should know." She began to say and she sat in the chair by the bed.

He looked at her with raised eyebrows.

"Sweetheart, Odessa's in the hospital room just down the hall."

His eyes grew wide.  "W-What? Why? What
happened—"

She held up a hand. "She hasn't been eating. She was very dehydrated and malnourished. She passed out at school." She explained very slowly.

His face fell drastically and Miguel's eyes turned sad. "She–She said she was going to try.She promised me. . ."

Thalia grabbed his hand again. "I know, honey. I know. Hailey tried getting through to her,  too. But she's very depressed. We've been through this before. She's having very strong affects of PTAD. It's going to take her a while, but she'll be okay. I promise." She reassured him.

"God, I feel like i'm ruing everyone's lives by being in here." The boy said and tears came out of his ears.

"Don't say that, Miguel. This isn't your fault. The one who started the fight is responsible. This shouldn't happen to anyone."

"C-Can I see her?" He stuttered.

She nodded gently. "When she wakes up, i'll see about getting you in there. But for now, just relax. You need to focus on you."

Odessa was exhausted. She owned her eyes and groaned at how bright the light was. She turned her head to the side to see her mom asleep in a chair and she realized she was in the hospital. "Mom?" She uttered.

Thalia opened her eyes. "Baby girl. You're awake!" She smiled brightly and quickly stood from the chair. "Can I get a nurse in here?" She called out.

"What happened?" Odessa asked and looked around the hospital room.

"Oh, baby, you passed out at school. You haven't been eating, Odessa Violet."

Memories of her being in the hospital two years ago suddenly reappeared. She closed her eyes and cowered. "I'm so sorry, mom."

"No. No apologies. this is a judgement free relationship. You know that." Thalia quickly said. She released a heavy breath. "But my god, child, you scared the shit out of me."

"I'm sorry, mommy. I tried so hard." Odessa cried.

Thalia sat on the bed with her and she fell into her arms. "I know you did, baby. You're just a girl. I'm sorry I didn't catch the signs sooner."

"I didn't want anyone to know." She whimpered and held tightly onto her mother's arms. "I felt like a failure. I didn't want to put you through that again."

Thalia closed her eyes briefly and kissed the top of her head. She heard footsteps and lifted her head to see Eli standing at the entrance of the room. His hand touched the doorframe and he looked nervous. Odessa raised her head and they met eyes.

"I'll go get some water." Thalia announced and patted her daughter's arm. She got off the bed and smiled at Eli. "Hi, honey."

"Hi, Ms. Reid." He uttered with shame. She briefly patted his arm when she left the room. There was an awkward, heavy silence.

Odessa locked her hands together and put them on her lap. "Hi." She slipped out.

"Hey." Replied Hawk, still standing in the doorway.

They stood there staring at each other. Neither knew what to say. Just hours ago, they were trying to hurt each other. Hurt their friends. "Geez, you look as bad as I do." She attempted to joke when she saw the bags under his eyes. When he didn't laugh, her lips turned downward. "Too soon?"

"Just a little bit." He responded and walked into the room. He sat down in the empty chair. "H-How are you feeling?"

"That seems to be the question of the year." She murmured.

"I'm serious, Odessa. You scared the fuck out of me. I was literally going out of my mind." He said sternly.

She looked down at her hands in guilt.

His tough gaze softened and he sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"No, i'm sorry. I didn't mean for any of this to happen." She quickly said. She looked back up at sucked in a very deep breath. "I don't know how to explain it. It's like ever since the school fight, I've just felt completely empty. Like nothing in my life is real. Like I'm not real. It's really, really hard to put into words." She wiped a tear from her eye. When she looked his way again, she saw tears in his eyes as well. She frowned. "Why are you crying?"

Hawk quickly smirked and used his shift sleeve to sipe his face. "He sniffled and used his shirt sleeve to wipe his face. "I'm not crying. You're crying." He mumbled.

"I know I'm crying." She put a hand on his face to lift it but he struggled against her hand. "Eli, it's okay."

"Crying's for pussies."

"You cried while watching The Notebook with me."

"Goodbye." He said and stood from the chair.

Odessa laughed and grabbed his hand, stopping him. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

Eli sat down in the chair again. "Okay, fine. I'm crying." he admitted and wiped his eyes again.

"Because I know you're past. I know this has happened to you before." He shook his head. "I-I saw how sick you looked and I didn't say anything. I've been acting like too much of an asshole to show that I still care about you."

Odessa stared at him with watery eyes. "I'm okay, Eli."

"No, you're not, Dess." He quickly said and dragged his hands down his face. "God, I fucking hate this!"

"Hate what?"

"Not being with you! Not being able to hold you like I want because I caused all of this. It's my fault because i'm a fucking asshole and you deserve so much better than me because you're the most amazing person in the world. But I love you and I'll never be able to not love you."

Her heavy heart became heavy until it felt like someone was stepping on her chest. She was crying. He was crying. Odessa wanted nothing more than to kiss him and to tell him that everything'll be okay. But she couldn't. Because they weren't together and it was because of him. As much as it pained her to believe it.

Everything that's happened couldn't be erased. She knew that now. Odessa leaned her head back against the pillow. "I love you too, Eli." She uttered. He lifted his head. "But we can't go back. I wish we could, but, we're too gone. Things are harder now. I can't be with someone who hurts the people I love because I love them more than myself."

Eli felt pitiful. He thought he was badass. The cool guy. Cobra Kai material. But he was just a boy. A boy in love with a girl who he promised not to hurt but he did. And he lost his friends in the process. "I'm sorry, Odessa." He almost whispered.

And through it all, she never called him Hawk. He was always Eli.

The nurses helped her get out of bed. "Pace yourself, honey. You're doing great." One of the nurses said as two of them had a right grip on her hands.

They had been filling her IV's with fluids. After a few hours, Odessa felt she had enough strength to get out of bed. But it was a struggle. She was still so tired. When they got her to her feet, Odessa stood there for a minute to clear the dizziness she was feeling. Her mom stood in front of her in case she fell.

"How are you feeling, honey?" Asked Thalia.

The blonde girl inhaled and exhaled deep and slow. She blinked a couple times. "I think I'm okay." She said with a nod. She looked at both her nurses. "I think I got it."

She walked out of the room with her mom, holding her arm tightly. But she was able to walk. That was a good thing. The only thing she wanted to do was see Miguel. What she wanted, Thalia gave her. "Order for Miguel." The woman announced when they walked into his room.

Miguel looked their way and smiled. "Hey, Dess." He said with a chuckle.

"Hey, Mig." She smiled back.

"Sit down, honey." Thalia said sat Odessa down in the chair by his hospital bed. "I'll give you guys some space."

When she left the room, Odessa looked at Miguel. I'd face down casted. "You broke your promise," was the first thing he said.

"Do you hate me?"

"Of course not," he replied instantly. "That's impossible. But I am mad at you."

She smiled guilty. "I expected that."

He stared at her for a minute before opening his arms.  "Come here." She came and sat with him on the bed. They hugged each other. "Does this make us hospital buddies?" Miguel asked.

She laughed. "I'm definitely signing that on your birthday cards."