HEART OF GLASS
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR !

[ season three, episode ten ]

Maybe Marley lied when she told Theo he didn't have to worry about Rick.

Ever since their valiant return from Woodbury, the group leader hadn't been stable. Even before Marley left to get baby Judith formula and wound up a hostage at the hands of the sadistic Governor, Rick had been unsteady. She was worried about him ━ everyone was.

He was nowhere to be seen; Maggie said he was scoping the perimeter. Nobody had gone to check. In Rick's place, Glenn had taken on the temporary responsibility of the authoritative mouthpiece. He was laying out a map of the prison on the ground with chalk, beginning to devise a plan for defence if the Governor decided to launch an attack.

Without his father around, Carl had no choice but to accept the change in circumstances. He crouched beside Glenn and gazed at the map, his brow cinched in confusion.

Marley leaned against the bars of her cell, chewing on a hangnail. The skin around her thumbs was mangled and cracked and bloody, yet she still sunk her teeth into it regardless, almost relishing in the sting of pain it caused. Something to take her mind off everything else, she supposed ━ with Sage's wound and Rick's descent into insanity and Theo's obvious reluctance with the dead. Things were stacking up. She was starting to wobble.

"He won't come here," a voice said, one Marley was all too familiar with.

She looked to the side. Beth was standing there, arms folded and her shoulder-blades pressed to the iron cell bars. Her oceanic eyes scorched into Marley's cerulean ones, trying to imply the same hopeful narrative through mere eye contact. It didn't work. When did that ever work?

Marley's shoulders slumped, "I wish I could agree. But he's a psychopath, Beth. All he wants to do is cause harm."

"We have fighters," Beth stated, looking at her shoes, "Even if he does come, we can fight. I'll fight. This is our home, he can't take it from us."

"He'll definitely try."

Beth blinked rapidly, as if trying to ward off tears.

She didn't cry as much anymore ━ not like she did at the farm anyways. Things had a way of getting her down then, but tragedy was so common now that the downfall didn't really impact her so intensely, or anyone else for that matter. It was part of their daily routine; the steady decline in their lives. Crying was time wasted. Fluid wasted. They had to be strong; if not for themselves, then for each other.

"I just worry about Judith, y'know?" she admitted apprehensively, twiddling her thumbs together, "Carl and Sage . . . they're just little kids. Even if we survive this, if this Governor does come and we manage to beat him, it'll impact 'em long term."

Marley gave a steady nod of agreement, "Yeah. I think it's already impacted Sage. I hardly know who she is anymore, Beth." Fiercely, she wiped her eyes before any tears had the chance to fall, "She's like a shell of who she used to be."

"My Daddy said she'll come around," Beth assured softly. Her voice itself was soothing, like a balm smoothed over sunburn or aching skin. It provided temporary relief, "You just gotta give her time. Things always get better."

"Do they? Feels like everything is just getting worse."

"You have to believe. I know God ain't you're kind of thing, Marley, but there are things to believe in beyond Him. Like hope."

Hope. It felt like such an unreliable concept these days. An untouchable entity, way beyond the grasps of human touch.

Marley hadn't believed in it for a long time ━ since Sophia crept out of the Greene's barn, decomposed and snarling. Everything since then felt like a never ending series of unfortunate events; like a farce. They were surviving . . . but for what? To avoid death out of fear? And for who? Marley lived for Sage, and Rick lived for Carl and Judith, and Maggie lived for Beth and Hershel and Glenn; but who did Carol live for, and who did Daryl breathe for? They suffered at the hands of the dead, and they kept living despite it. For what? There was no hope anymore. It was gone.

How could Beth still believe in something that was proven unreliable?

Marley's eyes drifted across the prison, landing on her sister. She was sitting on the steps. That was her permanent spot of residence as of late ━ out of the way of everyone else. One of her colouring books was splayed on her lap, and she was scratching a near-blunt green crayon across the page, her nose scrunchied in concentration. The bandage around her neck was spotted with blood; it was due a change today.

Beth noticed Marley watching Sage, and she leaned over, gently knocking their shoulders together, "Hey, I know what you saw at Woodbury was awful, but you gotta stop worryin.' If my Daddy said she'll come around . . . then I have full faith she will."

"I trust your faith," Marley murmured. Her hand instinctively gravitated to her mouth, and she started chewing on the hangnail around her thumb, "This world changes people for the worst, and I think I just assumed Sage was untouchable as long as I was around. But then Woodbury happened, and she got hurt, and I realised I was wrong."

Beth squeezed Marley's shoulder reassuringly, "It's not all on you. As you said, the world changes people. Can't avoid it. Can't stop it."

"I wish I could," Marley griped.

"But you can't," Beth insisted, "Nobody can. We're all victims of it ━ this world. If we're patient, we might just see the light at the end of the tunnel. It can't be bad forever."

Marley cocked an unconvinced brow, "Can't it?"

"Were you always this pessimistic?"

A small laugh reverberated in Marley's chest, "Yeah, I guess so."

"No, not always. When you were at my bedside, encouragin' me to keep goin,' that was optimism," Beth recalled forlornly, "Do you remember that?"

"I'll never forget," Marley said.

If she thought hard enough, she could still see the empty look in Beth's eyes, hear Maggie's scornful words ━ tainted by desperation ━ as she ripped the knife from Beth's hand and urged her not to be so selfish. Losing a sister on top of everything else would have broken Maggie entirely. Marley couldn't even imagine how she'd feel, what she'd do, if the world tore Sage away.

"You peeled my apple for me," Beth reminisced with a small chuckle, "'Cause you knew I didn't like the skin. I never got to say thank you."

Amused, Marley's lip curled at the corner, "I won't hold that against you. I think you were a bit too preoccupied with everything else in your life to thank me for some peeled apple slices."

"Well, I did appreciate it."

"I'm glad you did."

Beth crossed her arms, her oceanic eyes glazing over like they always did when she was thinking, "Not goin' through with what I planned, voluntarily leavin' this world . . . some days I regret it, some days I don't."

A shrug lifted Marley's shoulders, "You had every reason to feel like there was nothing left for you. After I lost my Mom ━ everything lost its colour."

"She was bit, right?"

Marley swallowed thickly, "She was."

"My Mama was, too," Beth said, sniffing. Her eyes welled with tears ━ but she was determined to maintain her composure, and so her dirt-caked face hardened and remained dry, "Her and Shawn, they left to get some supplies from town, but when they came back . . .  There was nothing Daddy could do. The fever got 'em in the end."

"I'm so sorry, Beth," Marley lamented.

"You don't need to be sorry."

She bowed her head, gazing at her blood-splattered shoes, "She would've been proud of you."

A sweet smile bloomed on Beth's face, "Your Mom would've been proud of you, too. You've grown so much since the farm."

"You think?"

Beth's smile grew, "Oh, I know."

Marley drummed her fingers against her thigh, "Back at the farm, before we found Sophia, Shane called me a little bird once. He was trying to get under my skin, paint me as one of the weaker ones," she mused, absently picking at the skin around her fingertips, "He's not here anymore, and it's like I'm still trying to prove him wrong."

The chasm between Beth's brows furrowed, "He always had it out for you, didn't he?"

"Shane? Yeah ━ he hated my guts."

"Well, I think you've proven him wrong," Beth said firmly, "You're stronger than he ever was. You have us ━ your family. We make each other stronger. That was somethin' Shane never had. He was too busy tryin' to build his own that he pushed the people who cared about him away."

Marley blew out a scoff, "I never cared about him."

"No, me either."

Their laughter was interrupted by Glenn, who had called everyone over as he was mapping out the interior of the prison on the ground with chalk. Plans for a fight. Oh, no. The thought of fighting the Governor and his abundance of trained militia-wannabes filled her with dread. She wanted to live. She needed to for Sage ━ to honour the promise she made her mother.

An all-out war was significantly depleting the likelihood of that happening.

She sidled up to Theo, who was leaning against the wall in front of Glenn, tapping his foot. Timidly, he offered Marley a wry smile. She returned it pleasantly, and then her guilty conscience kicked into action, and she found herself delving into a can of worms.

"Listen, about yesterday━"

"━You don't need to get into it," Theo interjected, his smile suddenly gaining a sympathetic edge to it, "I was thinking about it, and maybe I was scared to put the walkers down. Well, not scared, but definitely hesitant."

Marley nodded, "Yeah, I know. But it's none of my business. I'm sorry for being an asshole about it. I was just in a bad mood, and I was taking it out on the closest thing."

"And I unfortunately happened to be the closest thing." Theo retorted light-heartedly.

"Unfortunately," Marley said, wincing in shame, "I'll look for someone else next time."

Theo flashed her a grin, "Please do."

He looked away then, fixing his gaze on Glenn. Marley found herself wishing he would grin at her like that for a little longer ━ it really accentuated his . . . features. He had a nice smile, she decided. Definitely nice. Handsome, even.

She chewed on the inside of her cheek and followed his gaze to the elephant in the room.

Glenn ran a hand down his face, his stress seeping in now that he'd informally taken Rick's place, "The whole front of the prison is unsecure. If walkers just strolled in, then it's gonna be cake for a group of armed men."

"Why are we even so sure he's gonna attack?" Beth asked nervously, still adamant she was right about the Governor sitting this one out, "Maybe you scared him off."

"He had fish tanks full of heads," Michonne said, "Walkers and humans. Trophies. He's coming."

"I have to agree," Theo added, sticking his hand in the air like a student participating in class, "He has a sister, too. Helen. We can't rule her out of the equation. She's his right-hand woman."

Face awash with fury, Glenn clenched his jaw, "We should hit them now."

"What?" Beth squeaked.

"He won't be expecting it," Glenn said, "We sneak back in tonight, put a bullet in the back of his head. And save another for his sister."

"How do you suppose we do that?" Marley piped up, shaking her head. She loved Glenn like a brother ━ she rarely opposed him ━ but his recent change in attitude was not something she was on board with, "Last time we were in Woodbury, Oscar was shot and the Governor was inches away from killing Sage. I don't think starting round two is a wise choice."

Carol nodded in agreement, "We're not assassins."

Glenn ignored the pair of them and walked straight to Michonne, lowering his voice pointedly, "You know where his apartment is. You and I could end this tonight."

Michonne's expression hardened and she didn't give him an answer. Her face read no. Or maybe.

"I'll do it myself," Glenn insisted.

Almost reluctantly, Theo sighed through his nose and took a step forward, "If you're going, I will."

That left Michonne with no other choice but to agree. She wouldn't leave Theo; they were practically inseparable. Glenn gave a quick nod of acknowledgment and walked to the middle of the room, avoiding Marley's eyes like the plague. He'd ignored her ━ when had he ever done that before?

Across from her, Hershel looked worried, "He didn't know you were coming last time and look what happened. You were almost killed," he stated, gripping his clutches tightly, "Daryl was captured, Marley was injured, Sage's throat was cut, and you and Maggie were almost executed."

Glenn stormed toward him and spoke through gritted teeth, "You can't stop me."

"Rick would never allow this," Hershel said.

"You really think he's in any position to make that choice?"

Hershel lowered his eyes to the ground, "Think this through clearly. T-Dog lost his life here. Lori, too. The men that were here. It isn't worth anymore killing," he urged wisely, "What are we waiting for? If he's really on his way, we should be out of here by now."

"And go where?" Glenn shot back.

"We lived on the road all winter," Hershel said, a hopeful glimmer clouding his eyes.

"Back when you had two legs and we didn't have a baby crying for walkers every four hours."

Marley tugged at the mangled skin on her fingertips, "Glenn, we can't stay here. It's putting a target on our heads."

He still didn't meet her eyes, "We can't run."

"We can't sit here either," she insisted, "I hate the Governor as much as you do ━ he wronged us both. But charging into Woodbury, putting ourselves into that situation again, is jeopardising lives that we can't afford to risk. I won't lose you. Or Sage. Or anyone else."

Glenn blinked rapidly, and he finally met her stare. She pressed her mouth into a firm line, hoping it would deepen the creases around her features and he'd see the desperation in her face.

But he didn't, "We have nowhere to go. We can't run."

At that, Maggie promptly left the room. Her sudden departure seemed to knock some sense into Glenn. Maybe he wasn't being wise ━ everyone could see it. The decisions he was making would only lead to more death, more grief, more misery. Fighting was not always the answer. Sometimes it didn't hurt to take flight.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, "Alright. We'll stay put. We're gonna defend this place. We're making a stand."

Theo looked relieved.

Glenn crouched back in front of his chalk-map, "Right. Marley, you and I will go down to the tombs. We need to figure out where the breach is. You're good with hand-to-hand combat ━ we can't afford to waste any more bullets."

She gave a stiff nod, not overly pleased with him. He didn't listen to her, he ignored her desperation, yet Maggie didn't say a word and he listened to her. He relented. It was probably something to do with their undying love for each other ━ as far as it went ━ but it didn't have to be romantic just to be heard. Platonic was enough.

Michonne stepped forward, "You'll need some help."

Theo mirrored her actions, "From me, too."

"No, Michonne, in case anything happens, I need you out here," Glenn's bruised eyes drifted to the woman's bow-wielding accomplice, "But Theo, I'm happy for you to help."

He stuck his thumbs up, "Awesome."

Marley stifled a laugh with the back of her hand. He was so awkward that it was amusing.

Suddenly, her amusement warped to ashes in her mouth as Glenn shot up from the ground and practically shouted, "Who's on watch?"

✧.｡. *.

By midday, they still hadn't ventured down to the tombs, which left Marley wondering if Glenn had forgotten. He probably had. Any sane person could see he was finding it difficult to temporarily fill Rick's spot as the designated leader of the group ━ there were countless problems to deal with. He caved under the pressure of it all, and on top of that, he was still working through the trauma of being assaulted and having a walker thrown at him inside a locked room. Not only that, but there was unresolved tension between him and Maggie.

Marley found him outside, shoving supplies into the boot of Shane's old car. He saw her approaching and immediately bristled.

"Where are you going?" she asked worriedly.

He kept his back turned to her, "Out there."

Dread sunk like an anchor to the pit of her stomach, "What? On your own?"

"Yeah."

Marley swallowed, "Glenn ━"

"━If you're here to yell at me or challenge my authority, go right ahead."

She stumbled back, "Why would I do that?"

"It's what everyone else seems to be doing."

He turned around as if to leave, but Marley caught his elbow. She dug her fingers into his flesh accidentally, overfilled by her determination to keep him steady ━ they couldn't afford to see another leader dissent into insanity. She felt like the only person with a level head.

Glenn looked anywhere but her wide cerulean eyes, lest the guilt eat away at him. He was burning with fury. Ever since they came back from Woodbury, he'd been inconsolably angry.

"You're angry," Marley stated, pointing out the obvious, "Too angry. It's turning you into someone I know you aren't, Glenn."

He shook his head and gently removed his elbow from her grasp, "It's someone I have to be. The Governor is going to turn up on our doorstep any second. I can't politely ask him to leave, can I? You met him ━ you know what he's like."

"No, I know that, but you can't let your anger fester or it's going to get you hurt. I can't let you get hurt," Marley pressed, planting herself in his way, "It clouds your judgment. It happened to me, in that room with the Governor."

Glenn's brows furrowed. He didn't know the full details of her encounter.

"I was so angry that I ━ I just couldn't stop," she recalled, wringing her fingers together, "I managed to get the upper hand for a while, but it turned into something else. I saw things. It felt like the room was melting away. Then the Governor hit me, and I was out cold."

Glenn's fury only seemed to grow, "He hit you?"

She squeezed her eyes closed, "It doesn't matter now. Point is ━ I didn't win. Anger never wins."

"I understand what you're saying, Marley, but I can't just . . . let it go," Glenn said. He ran a hand through his hair, "He assaulted Maggie. He almost killed Sage. He hit you. Everything leading up to now, it feels like it's going to explode in chaos. I need to be the one to end it."

"It can't all be you," Marley argued.

"Rick's strolling through Crazytown as we speak, so I can't exactly go and ask if he'd be willing to do it instead," Glenn said sharply, "It has to be me. There's no other choice."

Marley ran her tongue across her teeth, "Why can't we just leave? We could hole up somewhere for a few weeks and then come back when it's safe━"

"I'm tired of telling people this. We can't run!" Glenn insisted.

"Don't shout at me," Marley snapped, prodding a finger against her chest, "I didn't ask for any of this to happen."

He turned back to the car, unable to meet her eyes once again, "Neither did I."

"Listen, I really care about you, Glenn," Marley informed, her tone much softer now, "I don't want you to get hurt. Merle already beat the shit out of you, and the Governor almost executed you. Running head first into this is just asking for something bad to happen. And I . . . I don't think I can handle another funeral. Especially yours."

Glenn didn't answer for a long while, but when he did, his words cut through her like a knife, "You can't avoid them."

She blinked back the tears that instantaneously formed in the wake of that statement. How could he say something like that? Something so cold. So unfeeling. He was usually so comforting, that was what she loved about him; his brotherly, sometimes fatherly, tendencies. This was not him. It was a detached version of Glenn.

Marley sniffed and then whirled on the heel of her shoe. She stormed away without a singular glance back.

"Marley!" he called after her, his voice thick with guilt and unshed emotion.

She ignored him.

✧.｡. *.

"Target practice," Theo stated. He pointed at the glass bottles propped up on the crumbling remains of the wall, "I'm not amazing with guns, but how different is it from a bow really?"

Marley blinked at him, "One uses arrows and the other uses bullets."

"Oh, thanks for that, Einstein," he remarked quietly.

She arched a brow at him and shoved him out of the way. Carl had let her use his silencer, and it was stuck to the end of her handgun ━ which only made it even heavier to hold. But she needed target practice. If the Governor came, she wouldn't be much use shooting bullets into the trees instead of their faces.

She also didn't have much time to learn. Apparently, according to Michonne, Theo had some of the best aim she'd ever seen. Inevitably, he was assigned the task of helping.

"Okay, so first off," Theo started, gazing at her distastefully, "Your stance is horrendous. Fix that immediately."

Marley gaped at him, "Wha━how?"

"Feet apart ━ not too wide apart. Lean back slightly, shoulders back, and align your sight with the target."

She gulped, "Say that again but a whole lot slower."

Theo rolled his eyes and sighed. He stepped up beside her, adjusted the gun in her hands, making sure it was aligned with the bottles. It felt easier to hold. Then, he stepped behind her and tenderly placed his hands on her shoulders, squaring them.

Heat rushed to her cheeks. She put her head down and made sure the strands of hair protruding from her ponytail covered the redness pooling in her complexion.

"Alright," Theo mused, clearing his throat, "Lean to the right just slightly."

"Like this?" she said, putting more weight on her right foot than the left.

He nodded.

"Can I shoot now?"

"Yeah, just wait━"

He was interrupted by a loud clang. The bullet had ripped out of the gun and hit a chunk of metal debris beside the wall. Embarrassed by the horrible shot, Marley hobbled back, caught off guard by the kick from such a small weapon.

Theo stared blankly at the metal where the bullet hit, "I hadn't finished my sentence yet."

"You said 'yeah'," she argued.

"Yes, which was swiftly followed by 'just wait.'"

Marley clicked her tongue impatiently, "Fine. What was I meant to just wait for?"

"It's your stance, it's really bad again," Theo pointed out, looking her and down with severe judgement in his deep brown eyes, "You know, it's actually causing me distress━"

"━Fix it then!"

He grumbled something incoherent and stepped behind her again. Hands shifted her shoulders back like a puppeteer, and she almost jumped in fright when they moved to her waist. Theo was careful not to make her uncomfortable, and he used one hand to gently turn her on an angle. She was more aligned with the targets now. He removed his hand, and it felt like his touch had scorched a lasting mark on Marley's skin.

Her cheeks were burning; she probably looked like a tomato. Alas, she cleared her throat and aimed at one the bottles.

Her finger squeezed the trigger and the bullet came soaring out ━ it sailed into the brick wall beneath her intended target. Much closer this time, but still not as good as she hoped. How was Sage better at this than her? How was Carl better? They were children. She was a few years away from being an adult. Sixteen.

"That was definitely closer," Theo pointed out, popping his lip out impressively, "Now try and hit one of the bottles."

"I was doing that before, funnily enough,"

Theo grinned that same smile from earlier that Marley had wanted to gaze upon forevermore, "In that case, I think you might need glasses."

She rolled her eyes, "Maybe if you stand up there, it'll make it a lot easier."

"Enough talk, hit the bottle."

"Yes, sir."

He crossed his arms and leaned back slightly. Marley suddenly found it very difficult to concentrate. Her hands felt sweaty, and the sun was much hotter than it had been ten minutes prior. She took a deep breath.

Her finger knocked the trigger and this time, it flew through the bottle and shattered.

A disbelieving huff left Marley's lips, "I did it."

Theo clapped in amazement, "See? You had it in you."

Before another word could be said, someone screamed and all hell broke loose.

━━━━━━━━━━

AUTHORS NOTE !

so im feeling confident with my
writing atm so expect some more
regular updates.

im considering rewriting the beginning
of this fic really minorly so it won't
be unpublished or anything, just
tweaked with new dialogue and stuff
added in. i just want to make it
better and i don't have full
confidence that my earlier
chapters are as good as they could
be. they have more potential.

but yes! i want to write
marley more so 🤞🏻