There was a knock on the door of Rosa's room and I looked away from the window when my dad came in. He leaned against the door and gave me a small smile before walking in. He closed the door behind him and walked over towards the bench, sitting across from me.

“Hello mon petit cub.” he said as he looked at me and I stubbornly turned my head to look out the window again.

“I'm not a cub anymore, dad.” I said coldly.

“Oh you'll always be my little cub even after you're sixteen.” he said, chuckling. “My strong willed cub.”

I looked at him, “Dad, get to the point.”

“I know it's hard.” he said, giving me a confused look. “The judgment for always packing and leaving. Ander doesn't understand since he's been here for most of his life. He felt bad after he cooled down and realized what he had said. And I know what's it like for the beginning when finding your mate. You think I liked your mother at first? I was nice enough to by her food and she threw it back at me in my face, accusing me of thinking she was some prostitute and that was my way of payment. Maybe that's why you two always fight, because you're both alike.”

“Dad, where are you going with this?” I asked him.

“I'm going with this—relationships aren't fairytales. You're gonna have rough patches in the beginning and you both may not agree with everything right now. The more you get to learn about each other, the closer you two will get and learn to deal with each other problems.” he said. “You're mom was a pain of the ass and a smartass. I'll admit, it was the beauty at first that drawn me to her but after I learn allot about from her, I fell in love. Get to know Ander instead of fighting already as if you two been married for almost fifty years.”

“Maybe we're just not compatible.” I said.

He chuckled, “Thalia, allot of us aren't compatible. We're animals who fight for leadership. Why do you think we don't run in packs anymore. We learn to deal with each other.”

“But I want that. I want the safeness of knowing I'll be in a good happy relationship.” I said. “I want to know I can be myself and do what I want without being told what to do. I don't want to be like most of the females who stay home and take care of their families. I wanna be independent and free.”

“Thalia,” he said, leaning forward and took my hand in his. He looked me dead in the eyes with a serious look, “It's about what we need, not what you want.”

Disappointed again, I lowered my head and sighed heavily, “And what do we need?”

“For you to marry Ander so we can stay with this family. Peter is willing to let us stay for right now but he wants his son married.” he said. “This is a good family, Thalia. They can teach us allot of things and they have good money. Peter and his wife Gesikah like you but you fighting with their isn't going to help.”

I pulled my hand away from his as I looked up at him, “Ander and I have already talked about this. We agreed to wait until I graduate before thinking of marriage.”

He shook his head, “No.” he said, leaving me confused. “Soon you two will be married. Once you turn sixteen, you'll be able to marry. You know the stories of other Jaguar men kidnapping the unwed girls and forcing them into marriage. You need to be protected.”

“You can protect me, dad—"

“No you need to be taken already and marriage can only do that.” he said and I quickly opened my mouth to protest but he spoke. “No arguments with me, Thalia. I'm sorry but you will marry Ander by the time spring comes. Your mom, me, and Ander parents already talk about this.”

“But what about my education?” I asked quickly in shock since this already plan my marriage without me even knowing! “If I get married, I will have to leave school and Kave wants me to finish.”

“Kave isn't the leader of the family, I am.” he said and I scoffed.

“Ander wants me to finish—“

“Ander will go over it faster than Kave. He'll be getting a wife anyways.”

“This is always about the family!” I coldly yelled at him. “It's always about what you or mom wants! Never about what I want! I don't wanna get married right now! I just wanna make friends, go to the mall or movies, worry about my weight and grades, and have a normal boyfriend! But I can't because I have to worry about what you two want. You planned my future without even asking me!”

“You think we want to make you get married?” he asked coldly and I quickly nodded. “No! We wish we could give you a normal human life because we know it's what you want but we can't! The human world isn't where our souls belong. It's in a Jaguar world and these are the rules. If you don't marry Ander soon, Peter and Gesikah will grow tired and think you're not worth their time. They'll find another girl for him to marry. This isn't just about learning how to be like them but to make sure you will go into a nice family who I know can protect you.”

“You aren't this hard with Kave! You tried getting him to marry once and he said no. You weren't pushing him this hard.” I coldly said.

“Kave is a man! You're a girl.” he said and I glared at him. I always knew that was the reason. The males always had things easier to them. “It's horrible to say, I know but it's the truth . Ander is a good man, he's respectful. Why are you acting like this?”

I glared at him for a moment before looking out the window, “I wish I wasn't a Jaguar than.”

My dad sighed heavily as he patted my knee and got up, “I know, Thalia. I know.” he said as he left me in the room alone.

*

Kave walked with me to school and I was complaining about yesterday, “I just don't get it. It's my life, I should be the person who plans out what's gonna happen.”

“I know, Thalia. I wish it was easier for you.” he said, sighing heavily. “Parents always think they know better and they know you best but the only person who knows you better is only you. They just believe they're doing the right thing.”

“Right thing is letting me do with what I want with my life. I know I may not be good in school but I enjoy going because it's normal. I want my ears pierced but I can't because of when I shift into a big cat. I so badly want to be normal.” I said, groaning. “Why do girls always have to 'obey' the males.”

He chuckled, “So you're gonna go against dad?”

I scoffed, “Of course not, I don't need my behind handed to me like he use to do to you. You were a real bad kid though. Always bring me into your trouble.”

“And daddy little cub always just got the literature.” he said, chuckling.

“Why'd you say no anyways?” I asked and he gave me a confused look. “To the Thornton girl?”

“Oh. I'm just not ready for that.” he said. “Sure I want a family and lots of babies one day but right now I just wanna live.”

“And be normal.” I added and he didn't argue with me. “See, you even agree with me! You just don't get the hot iron like I do about wanting to normal things. I know you got out every weekend to parties. I wonder how many human girls you hook up with.”

He put his arm around my head and his hand over my mouth, chuckling, “Hush now, cub. I have no idea what you're talking about.” he said and I bit his hand. He yelped, pulling away and rubbed the spot I bit.

We parted way and I went into school. I kept an eye out to watch for Rian but he didn't appear at all. As I walked down the hallways to get to the Sophomore hallway, he wasn't here today. That felt like a big relief since I don't know how I could face him after Ander beat him up yesterday. I would feel guilty and things would be very awkward.

“Poor Rian, apparently he got beat up pretty badly.” a girl I heard saying and I stopped by some lockers. I pushed my hair behind my ears so I could listen more carefully, “I can't believe he was jumped. Those cowards attacking him at night for no reason.

*

When school was over, I pushed my beanie down further my head as I walked out of the school building. I pulled my bag much higher on my shoulder and avoid everyone who was trying to be friendly to the new girl. No friends, Thaila. I had to remind myself that all day because making friends would be pointless. I didn't want to risk someone in my family causing trouble and having to pack up in the middle of night again.

When I looked up, I saw Ander by the parking lot of the school. He was leaning against a pole and waved to me. I stared at him for a moment, wondering if I should go over or just go the other way since I had been avoiding him since yesterday. He waved for me to come over and I sighed heavily, walking over to him.

I crossed my arms over my chest, “Hey.”

“Hey.” he said, standing up. “I thought I would come and pick you up from school.”

“Why?” I asked. “Don't trust me enough to walk home by myself?”

He sighed heavily before forcing a smile, “I wanted to apologize for what I said about you yesterday. I shouldn't have said all Jaguar Travelers are all the same. You're family is different from the others. I didn't think you guys would be when my dad quickly made the decision to let you guys in but you are.”

I sighed heavily as I turned to walk away and he joined next to me, “Ander, I know you are apologizing maybe because you do feel bad but I know it's because your parents are hoping for a marriage soon.” I said and he nodded. “I don't want to get married right now and I don't say that to hurt you.”

He stuck his hands in his pockets, “Thalia, I know how you feel. I heard you last night and I wish it wouldn't have to go this way. You're father right though, you are about to be a grown adult female Jaguar. You don't find a husband, you will attract males and they will do anything to make you theirs. You should know what they do to girls like yourself.”

“I know, I know.” I said, sighing heavily. I was quiet for a moment before turning to look up at him, “Do you like being a Jaguar?”

He gave me a confused look, “Of course I am. You should be to. We're amazing creatures, Thalia.”

“Than I wish I was a plain human.” I said. I pushed my hair behind my ears, “Ander, you don't know how I feel. I want nothing but a normal human life where I can make friends and never worry about keeping a big secret. Soon when I get pissed off, I'll change into a big cat. I seen my parents and brothers do it, they can't control themselves. What makes I can? I don't know how your family does it.”

“It's not easy.” he said. “I was so very close yesterday but Thalia,” he said, grabbing me from my arm and turning me to face him. “You stopped me. You calmed me down enough so I wouldn't murder him and I was going to do it with hesitation.”

“But imagine not needing to control yourself. Imagine just being normal.” I said.

“We are normal.” he said. “You should be proud of your culture and who you are.”

“Getting married at sixteen? Become a Jaguar and black out every time. Murder and eat people. Before in the old days, the Aztecs called us warriors but only because it was a nicer version of saying we were scary as fuck.” I said. “When is the last night you shifted?”

He stared at me for a moment, “Eight months ago.”

“Normal Jaguars will shift every night. You really think you're 'proud' when you get that part of yourself hidden?” I asked and he looked away. “You're just as scared of that part of you as I am. You know that side isn't a warrior but a monster as well. You just think more differently than I do. My eyes are wide open to both worlds. I refuse to let that side of me control me.”

He looked at me, “You can't stop it though, no matter what. I don't deny it, Thalia. I live with it, I deal with it. I got over it already that I can't control it forever. No matter what though, you can't either.”

“I can try.” I said. “I don't know how long I will be able to stay in school after my first transformation but I'm gonna spend the last week of my life as a normal teenager, not start planning a marriage.” I turned away and we started continue back to the house in silence. I knew he was right though, there was no running away from this in my life. I think if I could run away from it, it would be the last night I ever run away from something. I wasn't there when Kavan first shifted, my mom kept me away while my dad took him away for the night. I heard many different experiences and anything could happen that night.

I even heard some people died during it because they weren't strong enough to handle it.

When we got to the house I heard a noise from the other side of the door. Ander and I looked at each other confused before going in. I saw my Kavan being held down to the ground by Peter while my dad was holding back my mom yelling at Peter. Both Kavan and my mom eyes were reddish-yellow, burning like fire.

“You're not gonna cause trouble in this town.” Peter growled at Kave who bared and hissed dangerously at Peter. Ander bared his teeth at Kavan for make threats at Peter but I grabbed his arm to help him.

“Let go of my son!” my mom yelled.

“Peter, please don't do this.” my dad said, giving Peter a begging look.

Kavan growled, “I'll leave!”

“Kave?” I questioned and my brother eyes widen as his head shift to turn to me. “What's going on?”

Peter grabbed Kave face and forced him to look at him, “I have warned you already, cub. Follow my rules and you stay. You caused troubled again today and you're leaving now.”

“What?” I cried out, walking over towards them but Ander grabbed my arm holding me back.

Kavan bared his teeth and grinned, “Don't wanna be here with you Mestics anyways.”

'Kavan!” my mother cried out. “Beg for forgiveness, please!”

“I'm so tired of all of this anyways.” Kavan said. “I'll go, my own choice.”

Who knew this morning was gonna be the last moments I would have with my brother.

*

I watched as my brother threw his bag over his shoulder from outside and turned. He looked up at the window from Rosa's room up at me and gave me an apologetic look. I wanted to be sad and cry but I wasn't. I was angry because he was choosing to leave, not beg Peter to let him to stay. I gave him a very blank look as I stared back at him. Kavan always wanted to leave after his first transformation but he always stayed because my dad would guilt trip into staying with the family but like me Kavan was a determine. He always wants freedom and wants to go out into the world on his own.

Rosa came over, sniffling because she was crying, “He hadn't finish teaching me how to skateboard. Now who's gonna?”

I could hear my mother crying from the room across the hall and it broke my heart to hear her but I pretended as if I didn't care because I always had to pretend I didn't care when it comes to family making decisions.

Kavan turned around and started walking down the street. I watched him until he had turned the corner before I could finally turn away. I walked over to the door and opened it. I walked around and Ander was in the hallway leaning against the stair rails. I walked over and he didn't look sorry for what his father was making my brother do.

“My brother gone and I don't know when I might see him again.” I said.

“I'm sorry, Thalia.” he said but he didn't look very sorry about it. “But my father was thinking about all of our safety and your brother wasn't following his rules. You all are in our house, he should have respected my father."

“I know.” I said. “Kave always wanted to go, I think they just pushed him to finally do it.”

I walked over to the bathroom and went inside. I turned on the shower and took my shirt off. I noticed something in the comer of my eyes in the mirror and I turned my head to look at the mirror. I stared at my abdomen where I saw some ashy looking spots on my light ebony color skin. I dropped the shirt and walked over closer to the mirror. I brought my hands up to my stomach and looked down at it where I saw spots. I knew they would be coming any day but I hadn't noticed them till now since you can't feel them, they just appear. They appear about a few before the big day and cover most of my body. Most of them go away after my first shift and go the Jaguar part of me.