Winter on Haven was a far cry from anything Alyssa had known while growing up in Toronto. Here, the air blew in cold off the water but with a different kind of chill, more damp than dry and though on most days the sky was somber, the temperatures remained mild and comfortable.

But when it rained—it poured. In hard, driving sheets that would saturate to the bone in seconds, as she'd learned the hard way when she'd stepped out without an umbrella. Now Alyssa made a point of keeping one in the car at all times, not trusting the weather man who, more often than not, got it wrong.

Alyssa decided to step out for some light shopping. Clothes, makeup, a few sundries as she was running low on essentials along with a list of things they would need for the event tomorrow night after she'd practically forced Eva to hand it over. With the clock set against them, the last few days had been full throttle as Eva, Jenelle and Alyssa poured themselves into preparing the launch of the Initiative program to tie in with the re-opening of Out Of Focus.

There was going to be a solid turnout of reporters and media tomorrow night, thanks to Marshall's connections. But Alyssa had worked hard with Eva's lawyer, Declan Mackenzie, drafting a Media Release all would have to sign, confirming that the use of cameras would only be allowed during the opening speeches followed by a brief Q&A—all delivered by Alyssa and Jenelle. After which, no photos or video recordings of any kind were permitted. A single photographer would circulate and all photos would be screened and approved by Eva herself before being released to the media.

A tad excessive, perhaps, but Alyssa was more concerned with maintaining her sister's comfort. Anyone who refused to comply would simply be denied entry, a gamble she was willing to take, knowing that a journalist or reporter would sooner cut off their hand than have themselves barred, especially since a couple major celebrities had joined the attendance roster.

And the other day, Alyssa had confirmed that the first kick off for the Initiative Program would be a contest for youth. The Budding Artist, they'd call it. The top three candidates would be eligible for a scholarship with a prestigious art school in New York, the artwork sold in the gallery and proceeds donated to an as yet undetermined charity.

It was going to be a huge event.

She'd missed this thrill—this rush of bringing a project together like this. Expanding beyond a simple idea into something tangible, real, and made the void in her life all the more difficult to ignore. Work was integral to her makeup. She'd taken on her first job at fifteen working as a cashier in a local pharmacy barely making six bucks an hour. But ambition had always been a constant for Alyssa, and within six months she'd advanced to supervisor, managing a team of thirteen along with the pharmacy and cosmetics tills, balancing the store's safe and cashing out, handling the bankroll and managing the safe.

And got a whopping seventy-five cent raise to show for it.

The memory made her chuckle and sigh in equal measure.

Weaving through the slender aisles of a home décor boutique, Alyssa plucked up a couple pillows for the couch, some decorative candlesticks, a few fussy bowls she pictured holding fruit on the table, a new throw blanket and a small area rug for the bedroom. Having spent over a month in the cozy little cabin she wanted a few items for comfort. Items that wouldn't been intrusive to a man's space and could easily be packed up when she left. And maybe lifted out again when she came back to visit for a weekend, here and there.

Because that would be all she could manage once she returned to the real world. To life. And tried not to read too much in the disappointment tightening in her chest at the thought of what that would mean for her and Ethan. He was a grown man who certainly understood that this—whatever this was—was only temporary.

He came out to her cabin almost every night for the better part of the week. And left long before the crack of dawn to head home to shower, change, and in part, she suspected, to avoid local gossip. The brunt of an island community where everyone knew each other meant that waking to find Officer Davies car camped outside her place would certainly loosen a few tongues over morning coffee at the office. Some mornings he joined her at the gym, and it was nice—falling into that sort of easy routine together.

What they had going on right now was fun. And she was determined to enjoy it—to squeeze out every precious drop—but it couldn't last. She would have to get a job and go back to work, at some point. Money aside, she needed the challenge. The responsibility. She needed to be pushed, to have her mind tested. Certainly if anyone could understand dedication to ones job, it would be Ethan.

Cut the man open and he'd bleed justice, law and order. Wearing the badge wasn't a paycheck, but a vocation. Take that away from him and Alyssa doubted he would know what to do with himself. She felt just as stripped. Just as naked and lost. And while this Initiative Program was giving her something to sink her teeth into, and Ethan's company at night offered a balm to soothe her wounds, underneath all of that, her heart still ached and throbbed with the loss of her identity. Her sense of self.

And it was following that train of thought as she exited the store with her purchases that had her reaching for her phone.

"Indira Varma's office, this is Paul speaking."

"Hello, Paul." Alyssa smiled at the sound of his voice, dumping her purchases in the trunk. She could almost picture him at his desk. A handsome Latino with dark hair styled in a retro-chic fifties coif, bow tie and slacks. A trendy, urban metro-sexual who was straight as an arrow but adored fashion. She shut the trunk, leaned back against it. "Is Indy around?"

"Hey, chica. You called at a good time. Hold on." Alyssa waited as the line clicked and transferred over from Paul's phone to the one in Indy's office.

"Hey," she answered. And sounded utterly defeated. "Everything alright?"

"Yeah, I'm great, but sounds like yuou can't say the same. Something wrong?"

There was a long pause, followed by a bracing sigh. "Orvana Holdings was given to Juarez."

"Get out." Sliding into the driver's seat, Alyssa slotted in the key, revved the engine before pushing out into the street.

"Yeah. And evidently it's because he's blowing Dillon."

"The partner?" And Alyssa clapped a hand over her mouth before she could follow up with a slew of holy fucks. 

"One and the same. I didn't even know either of them were gay let alone hot for each other. Then I happened to see something in the library that I will never un-see, no matter how hard I try. No one goes in there but associates and paralegals and as it was pushing almost one in the morning I guess they figured they were safe to play. Thank god both of them were too...involved to notice me, or else I'd likely have been called in for an interesting meeting with Dillon." A laugh seeped out of Indy. "A man blowing his way to the top. How's that for irony?"

Juarez was always the first to let rip with the crass jokes. Alyssa recalled his behaviour during a Christmas party she'd attended as Alyssa's date where he'd ribbed them about Indira bringing her 'girlfriend' to an event, but quickly laughed it off. According to Juarez, a joke—however inappropriate—was nothing to get all uptight about.

But now, Alyssa thought, perhaps he'd been projecting a bit of his own baggage and insecurity into the subject?

"I never liked the bastard. But are you really surprised?"

"Truthfully? No. I'm tired, Lys. I'm so fucking tired. Every day I come in at seven and push until I can hardly stand. For years, I've put my nose to the grinding stone, believing that grit and work ethic alone would get me to where I want to be in this firm. I don't know if it's because I'm a woman, or Indian, or both, but nothing I do seems to be worth a damn. This pace? It's hellish and gruelling and I don't know if I can do it much longer."

"You should get away," Alyssa said, taking the turn towards Main Street. "You've got some vacation time owed to you, right?"

"I carried over the max allotment of a week and a half," Indy confirmed. "The rest was paid out. Anyway, enough about me and my petty bullshit. How are things with you? Your sister?"

"Good. We're doing good. I was out shopping for final touches for the re-opening event tomorrow while Eva's at rehab on the mainland." Rolling towards the parking lot, Alyssa swung in and pushed all the way to the back near the ferry terminal. Eva's boat wasn't due to dock until quarter after two, which meant she had at least a half hour to wait, so she threw the car into park and shut down the engine. "I went with her last time the doctor's confirmed that after this month she won't need to come back."

"Amazing." There was a smile in Indy voice when she said it. "You must feel so relieved. Both of you. Last time we spoke you guys teamed up on some initiative project?"

"Yeah, it's going to be one hell of a party, Indy. I wish you could be here to see it. Hint, hint."

"Don't tempt me." Indy laughed. But then that laugh eased into a groan. "I've got a meeting in ten, babe. Call you later?"

"Sure." She'd offered to keep Payton and Lucy after school for a few hours as Marshall was taking Hailey to her evening counseling session later, before dropping them off with Ethan's parents. "I'm free until seven."

"Seven? What are you doing after seven?"

"Not what," Alyssa giggled, "but who."

"Oh, you little bitch I can't believe you've been holding out on me. Okay, I can carve out a half hour at six. Don't leave me hanging."

            "It's a date," she agreed. Blew a kiss and hung up.

#

Groaning, Ethan leaned back in his chair and swept his hands over his face. He was crossing the twenty hour mark and the edges of his vision were starting to blur as he was called in to pull a longer shift thanks to a pile up that happened out near the reservation.

Four cars totalled, two dead and six badly injured. He'd had to make several calls to the mainland mortuary as the hospital on Haven didn't have the room to hold the bodies and the critically injured were airlifted to Vancouver General Hospital, a superior facility with a better team of surgeons.

One of the injured parties was a damn kid. Little girl, barely ten. The sight of her fractured body hauled out of the wreckage would haunt him to his dying day. Her father had died on impact and her mother's prognosis had been touch and go. They wouldn't know more until the morning.

He dragged his hands down at the hesitant knock at the door, and blinked a few times to make sure he wasn't seeing things.

"Hey," he popped out of his seat. "What are you doing here?"

Alyssa closed the door behind her, wiggled the plastic bags she carried in one hand, the other was hooked over her shoulder. Her coat was scattered with rain and it damped her hair, her skin. "I thought you might be hungry so I brought dinner to you.

Ethan took the bags from her hands, set them on the counter before yanking her into his arms. He held on tight. Burying his face in her hair. And just held her. Sensing his needs, understanding, Alyssa said nothing. She only held him and let herself be held. Hands circling the wide expanse of his back until degree by degree the tension eased out of his body.

When he was calmer, steadier, Ethan drew back and pressed his lips against hers. "It's good to see you."

"It's good to be seen." She smiled up at him, brought her hands around to hold his face. "You look exhausted."

He felt exhausted. Like an old log chewed up into mulch, every piece of him was weary and broken and fragmented. But here, standing with Alyssa in his arms, those pieces gathered together. Took shape.

"The local news has been broadcasting about that accident that happened out by the First Nations reserve. I figured that must be why you were tied up when you left that message saying you had to cancel tonight."

"I'm sorry," he sighed, regretting his quick and abrupt call to break their plans for dinner. Between her preparations for tomorrows re-opening with the gallery and all the overtime he'd crammed for the Ji Kim matter, they hadn't had much opportunity to really be together. And the nights he'd crawled out to her cabin hadn't left much room to do anything but fall asleep. He'd wanted tonight to be different. But life had other plans. "I should've—" 

Alyssa stopped him with a brush of her fingers across his lips. "Work is important. This is important. What you do has to come first, Ethan. I get it. No explanations. No apologies." 

And because he wasn't quite sure what to say to that, he reached for her coat, helped her shrug out of it.

"It's pissing rain out there tonight," she said as he hung it on the back of his door.

"Supposed to get worse over night and carry into the morning." Flicking his fingers through the blinds, Ethan glanced out down the hall towards the bullpen. The precinct was quiet. He had two officers on hand and four more on-call if he needed them. Benjamin was at the call desk, answering the lines. Devon, from what he could see, was cocked back at his desk. Eyes closed and boots propped on the filing cabinet. Like Ethan, he was putting in a twenty hour day and he wasn't about to begrudge the guy a few minutes of shuteye.

Ethan shut the blinds. Turned the locks.

"What did you bring me?"

Alyssa nodded at the bags. Hands in her back pockets. "I made a turkey chili. Seemed like he kind of night for one."

"Hm." Ethan nodded as he approached, drawing her against him. 

"I also picked up your suit from the dry cleaners."

"Thanks for that."

"I was thinking about tomorrow. Since we're both going to the same place, we could—I mean why not..."

"Why not go together?" Ethan finished for her, his hands stroking down her arms. Touch. His hands wanted to touch. To roam. So he let them. Over her hips and the curve of her ass to squeeze.

She trembled against him. A delicious little tremor that made him feel like a God. "Makes sense, don't you think?" 

He pressed his lips to hers, a slow and yielding kind of kiss he couldn't explain. He steered her back to his desk. Nudged her against it. His mouth working on hers. A little heavier. A little hotter. Until he felt the edge of a smile creeping in as her hands slid between them.

"Here?" she giggled as he lifted her onto the edge, his body pouring over top of hers.

"Yes," he whispered. Mouths busy. Hands wild. "Here."