Hello... so in case you did not know, I'm from Chile. Chile right now it's under social and political revolution, the country is practically burning and things have been incredibly chaotic since October 18th. Please read about it and I'm here if you have any questions about what is happenning and how the goverment and special forces are violating our human rights. 

This is the main reason why I haven't written or posted anything, as I've been scared, worried and trying to stay safe.

I managed to write something because I needed some fluff and happiness, too. Some normalcy. I hope you guys enjoy the chapter and if you wanna talk about anything, I'm always on IG. In addition, I post as much content in English as I can of what is happening in Chile-

IG: @imoniren

Bel, xx

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      Jinyoung is utterly nervous, to the point he cannot stop fidgeting, changing his weight from one foot to the other and then back. He does not remember the last time he felt this restless, and he's been at it for a while. The young man arrived twenty minutes earlier than agreed upon with Jaebeom, at the exit number four of Gangnam station. The birthday party is supposed to be a few minutes walk from there and they'll head to the building together. They agreed to meet at two thirty and since around one, his heart is beating faster. Jinyoung blames it solely to the fact he's been thinking of Jaebeom all morning after ending the call, with more than one fantasy of just cuddling him and falling asleep next to him.

He is having the purest and softest fantasies and he is losing his cool, how pathetic.

"Jinyoungie," the young man hears his name being called, a voice he can recognize now.

His heart does this little jump in his chest that has little to do with the surprise and a lot with the addresser. Holding his breath, hoping it'll help him to look casual and nonchalant, he turns around.

Jaebeom is right there, smiling and looking deviously handsome with the big bag hanging from his shoulder, dressed in his black ripped jeans, white t-shirt and that stylish sport jacket with metal details at the lapels that catch Jinyoung's eye. He looks young but mature, confident and stylish.

And why on Earth is Jinyoung paying so much attention to even the details on Jaebeom's clothes?

"Did I make you wait? I overslept a little but I thought I was on time," the older man comments, taking a look at the watch on his left wrist, looking a bit puzzled.

"I got here earlier than expected. You're fine, I just underestimated how fast the subway is," Jinyoung replies, watching carefully how Jaebeom puts his hand down to look at him with a smile.

"Aw, were you that eager to see me?" Jaebeom teases, lightly and keeping that smile.

"Oh," Jinyoung answers without thinking, surprising not only Jaebeom but himself, too.

The older man's expression changes from surprise to blinding delight, his smile is wide and full of joy, his eyes almost disappearing. Jinyoung blushes immediately, his whole face and neck feel hot, and his ears are burning in embarrassment. He wants to hide but there's nowhere to run.

"I mean, I uh..." he starts babbling, looking everywhere for some escape. "Never mind, let's just go."

He starts walking and shuts his eyes tight when he can hear Jaebeom chuckling behind him before he starts jogging to catch up.

"Jinyoungie, wait," the other man calls but he does not stop. "It's the other way."

He stops abruptly, more embarrassed than before. Trying to keep what's left of his pride, he turns around just to have Jaebeom almost bumping into him. Jinyoung gasps in shock, stepping back but tripping with his own feet in a show of zero grace. The older man grabs his shoulders to help him, however there's no need to pull him against his chest or wrap his arms around Jinyoung. The younger boy does not fight it, though.

"You're unbearable cute, Jinyoungie," Jaebeom speaks softly, almost a whisper that Jinyoung can hear so clearly when he is in the other man's arms. His own limbs start moving to wrap around Jaebeom. "How am I supposed to hold back?"

"Why hold back?" he asks, wondering why he's still hugging Jaebeom but at the same time, feeling his body relaxing and warming up, like being wrapped by a blanket, comfortable and safe.

"I don't want to scare you or rush things. I want this to work," Jaebeom explains and Jinyoung feels so incredibly touched for that consideration.

"I'll try to hold back too, then. From being too cute, you know?" Jinyoung mutters and can hear and feel the way Jaebeom chuckles.

"Ah Jinyoungie, you're driving me crazy," Jaebeom breathes out, squeezing the young man's body just a bit tighter before completely releasing him.

If Jinyoung is honest with himself, he'd like to go back to Jaebeom's arms. It was too warm, too comfortable and it's been so long since anywhere or anyone made him feel that way. He was just starting to feel like he could relax and let go of everything. It almost felt like when he is at the highest point of some building of bridge, that freedom to let go, feeling safe and away from everything. Whereas it's always cold at rooftops or any height point, it was the opposite in the arms of the man standing in front of him, and that was something Jinyoung never thought he could experience.

Why is Jaebeom so welcoming, such a safe haven when they barely know each other? Why does he feel so comfortable around him? It's almost as if another part of him, something deep inside, already knew Jaebeom.

"Let's go while I still can keep my hands to myself," Jaebeom points out, turning around as he rearranges the bag to the other shoulder and starts walking. Jinyoung quickly catches up, walking at the side opposite from the bag.

"What do you have there?" he asks to change the topic and hoping like that his cheeks will stop being so red.

"All the equipment. Some lenses, my camera and other things," Jaebeom explains, readjusting the strap on his shoulder.

"It looks heavy," he points out, watching Jaebeom shrug. "Are you tired? What time did you fall asleep? When I woke up, the call was still going and I could hear you snore."

Jaebeom's head snaps in his direction, aghast and horrified. It amuses Jinyoung greatly, seeing the other one flustered and embarrassed.

"I do not snore!" The older man exclaimed, bushing and Jinyoung just loves it.

"Oh you do, softly like a kitty, but you definitely snore. Next time I'll record you so you believe me," Jaebeom is only gaping, and it's so addictive to watch him like that. "It's quite adorable."

"I-I..." the older one mumbles. "I fell asleep a bit after you didn't respond. Which I find sad, I was singing you a lullaby and you ignored me."

Jinyoung smiles, knowing what the other man is doing and allowing it.

"You sing really well and it worked like magic," he answers, really meaning it. He was surprised when the night before Jaebeom started singing a very old song. His voice is velvety, deep and breathy, it's soothing and like honey, Jinyoung felt like he could hear him sing forever. "I slept really well, thank you."

Jaebeom smiles, clearly happy and satisfied, and Jinyoung loves that smile

"I'm happy just knowing it helped you. I know very well how hard it is when you can't sleep," Jaebeom comments as they walk, and Jinyoung can only imagine all the stress the older boy went through during his mother's coma. "I'll be there whenever you need it, just a phone call away."

There's so much emotion bubbling in Jinyoung's chest, too touched with the offer and the sincerity in Jaebeom's voice and expression; he truly means it. The young boy does not know exactly what to say, 'thank you' is too insignificant for how much it means to him. It's been a struggle all his life, or as much as he remembers, to be able to sleep peacefully. No matter how tired he is, he always struggles and feels suffocated ,scared, and anxious, plus he wakes up even more tired. Knowing that now he can call Jaebeom and having him lull him to sleep is like opening the blinds of an eternally dark room.

Robbed of words, Jinyoung can only reach for Jaebeom's arm, squeezing the wrist and trying to smile. He has no idea if the other man can understand, but he hopes so. And it seems Jaebeom does, because he smiles and taps Jinyoung's hand, squeezing it back.

Is it crazy that Jinyoung feels like crying?

"I—I don't... don't understand why you're so kind to me," Jinyoung stutters because it's too shocking and no matter how many times he thinks about it, he cannot understand. People aren't exactly kind to him, they are polite or worried, but never to the point of doing so much to help him instead of just trying to 'cure' him. Jaebeom doesn't make him feel weird, or crazy and he just supports him with small things that mean the world to Jinyoung.

He cannot understand Jaebeom.

"Because I want to do nice things for you," Jaebeom smiles. "It makes me happy, I selfishly feel good when I do something for you." That makes sense to Jinyoung, so he nods. Some people truly enjoy doing good. "And I feel you need that, so it's a win-win."

The young man can only breathe in, controlling his own emotions and Jaebeom must understand because he looks straight, one hand on the bag strap and the other moves until Jinyoung loses the grip, but soon he feels the older man's hand in his, fingers intertwined.

Jinyoung's heart is racing.

They do not speak for a bit but after a few minutes, Jaebeom starts talking about the birthday party and that helps Jinyoung to not only pay attention to the way his heart won't stop hammering. Soon they make it to the building and the event room where some people are preparing everything, only a few kids running around.

"Wait for me here, I'll be right back," Jaebeom says, letting go of Jinyoung's hand and walking away. He follows him with this eyes to see him greeting a couple, probably the birthday kid's parents. He cannot hear but he is surprised when Jaebeom motions to him and the couple nod their heads in acknowledgement. Jinyoung bows his head, too.

A few minutes later the older boy comes back explaining what he already suspected, and adding that he said Jinyoung was a friend helping him out. The parents didn't mind. Jaebeom then takes out his camera and explains things.

"I brought a regular lens, but also my portrait one as I think those will be very nice if the parents want to do a photobook or frame any of the shots," Jaebeom explains as he shows the different lenses, setting up the portrait one first. "I really like this one, it takes really emotive shots."

Without asking, Jaebeom aims the camera to capture Jinyoung in a shot. Surprisingly, it's not only one but several shutter noises and he barely moves, too surprised. The older man lowers the camera to check the quick pictures he took, smiling. Jinyoung approaches to look as well, and whines when he sees his face, flustered and surprised, a bit blurry and way too much close up.

"I look terrible. You can see all my pores and the dark bags under my eyes," he complains. "Delete that atrocity, please."

"Never," the other man refuses. "I love this, you look so surprised and cute." Jinyoung puffs his cheeks, annoyed. "So cute," the man mutters, smiling so fondly. "For now, let's start taking pictures."

And that they do, walking around taking pictures of the kids that soon start arriving, all dressed as superheroes running all over the place. The parents gather as well, enjoying the drinks and food while the kids playing and screaming. Jinyoung watches how Jaebeom crouches to take pictures, trying to capture different moments of the birthday party. At times he swaps lenses and takes more shots, occasionally asking the kids to stop and smile. It's not boring for Jinyoung at all, he is mesmerized watching Jaebeom work and he's very curious to see the result, plus, he gets to eat some snacks and a glass of wine.

The hours pass by, the birthday song is chorused and presents opened before the kids resume their insane playing, and that means Jaebeom's gig is over. One last time he approaches the parents to say goodbye and promise to send all the edited pictures as soon as possible. And after that he comes back to Jinyoung.

"Was it too boring?" Jaebeom asks.

"You look cool while working, it was fun. I also had a glass of wine and apparently I'm a lightweight. It's been so long since I drank," he laughs, feeling bit lightheaded.

"Blimey, I didn't even notice you drank something," Jaebeom laughs, his right hand grabbing Jinyoung's elbow which is a great support. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fiiiiiiine," he smiles widely.

Jaebeom chuckles again. "Okay then, let's go to a park and let me get you some food so you can totally sober up."

Jinyoung only smiles and lets Jaebeom lead the way, out of the room and the building complex. He is not drunk, but being tipsy seems the perfect excuse to link arms with Jaebeom and walk side by side, closer than necessary.

Moreover, it's not like Jaebeom minds.