(Song for the end of the chapter)

Zayn

The reason why I awoke was the alarm clock that blared through my ears, startling me as it was quite rare that I had to wake at a specific time here in the hospital. Squinting my eyes, I pressed it off, smiling lightly. For Rose, I'd do it.

It was currently half past one at night, the department was engulfed in quietness by the sleeping patients. Carefully getting out of bed, I changed into some sweatpants and a tee-shirt, pulling my beanie over my bald head. Brushing my teeth, I quietly left my room once I was done, knowing she would be in the living room to do some schoolwork, something she usually did on her night shifts.

My eyes fell onto the beautiful girl instantly, making a smile grow onto my face. I had been right. Her head was in her hand, her elbow resting on the table as she was playing with her pencil. It seemed she couldn't concentrate on her schoolwork, making me wonder if she was tired.

"Rose." I whispered, not meaning to startle her in a way or wake the other patients that were still sleeping. It would be quite rare, but I didn't want to take any risks.

Rose looked up right away, a soft smile making its way onto her face. "Zayn, hey. I've been waiting for you."

"You were?" I gulped, but covered it up right away, not wanting to let her know that she made me blush, and that she had been the only person so far who had made me blush in a way like this before.

She removed her hand from under her chin, smiling widely. "Yeah, let's go." I watched her as she left her schoolwork just like that, walking over towards the elevator. For a moment, I was confused, but when I simply followed her inside and she pressed onto the button that led to the eighth floor, I understood and smiled by myself, turning my face away from her.

It was only a brief moment of silence later when the elevator beeped, letting us know we had arrived. Once the door had opened, the both of us quickly got out and ran through the hallways into the complete darkness. Adrenaline kicked in, Rose laughed quietly. I was glad the nurses hadn't seen us, they would make sure we wouldn't ever do it again if they found out.

Opening the creaky door of the old hospital room, I switched on the lights and sat down on the bed, feeling rather tired after the intensive running. Opening the blinds from the skylight, Rose switched off the lights again as the moon and the stars had enough lights itself.

Rose lied down beside me, her dark eyes meeting the starry night. "Can't ever get used to this. It's so pretty." She sighed contently.

"Just like you." I whispered so quietly, that I coughed when she turned her face to me. Turning my sitting position to lying down beside her, with a friendly space still between us, I pretended nothing had happened.

"Did you say something?" Rose's expression was skeptical, it looked sweet, in a way.

Chuckling softly, I pretended to be confused. "I didn't say anything, Rose." Facing the ceiling, I gazed at the deep dark sky, that was full of tiny sparks- the stars. The moon was nearing to be full completely, it was enough to make a circle out of it. It was bright, but unlike the sun, I loved how we could look into it without getting blinded.

"Oh." Rose smiled warmly, but her eyes stood playful. "I thought I heard you say something."

"What?!" I sat up, instantly, looking at her with wide eyes. "You heard a voice? It could've been the voice of the old man or lady who died here years ago!" I exclaimed, looking around me with my eyes still wide.

Rose's hand smacked my arm, making me look at her. I could barely hold back my laughter at the distressed expression her face had. "Don't do that! I mean it, if you do it again I will never go back to here anymore." She groaned lightly, giving me a warning look.

Lying back down again, I grinned, not being able to hold myself back. "Perhaps, their hearts were still willing to go on."

Rose gave me a look, her left eyebrow raised higher than her right one. "Seriously? I thought you were over those lame Titanic jokes." Soft chuckles escaped from her lips, it made me smile. I turned my attention back to the skylight.

"Sorry, sorry. You're right. One of them must have had a heartbreak as they went. Shouldn't joke about it." Licking my lips, I looked at her. "Forgive me, sweet Rose."

Rose rolled her eyes and leaned onto her elbows, looking at me playfully. "Will I? You know what it feels like."

Frowning lightly, I thought about her words for a while. "I do? Yeah.. maybe, I don't know. I don't really feel like I had a proper heartbreak."

Rose's gaze was still on my face. "How did you meet her?" Turning my face to her, I couldn't help but stare at her, it hitting me how pretty she actually was. Her body turned onto her back, but her face turned lightly towards me, the moonlight bringing out the features of her face and bringing light into those dark, brown eyes. The shape of her lips was suddenly very visible as well- I had to try everything to hold myself back from leaning in and kissing those.

"Conservatory. I met her there. She was one of the best violinist in the whole, entire school." I mumbled out, reluctantly thinking of the girl I had been in a relationship with.

Rose's mouth fell open, her fist nudging my shoulder. "You went to conservatory?! Only the best musicians get accepted into such universities!"

"They say so." I smiled, a little sheepish, taking in the complement, even when it wasn't completely directed towards me.

"Not that it surprises me. You can sing, play the piano, probably even more instruments. That's insane, I've always wanted to do something like that." A soft sigh escaped from her slightly parted lips, but she recovered and shook her head, looking back at me. "Sorry, you met her there because she was the best violinist."

"Yeah." I chuckled lightly, my eyes falling onto her face once again. "It wasn't a healthy relationship, but I only realised that much later. I just thought I truly liked her, so I never parted my way from her."

Rose's eyebrows furrowed. "Why was it unhealthy? What was it like?" She asked, her voice so sweet and soft.

Thoughtfully biting my lip, my mind went back to when we were together, making me sigh. "She just.. she played with my emotions all the time. She made me choose between her or my friends, had no trust in me for who knows why. She was really manipulative, and because of that- I lost many friends of mine. I was naive, like a bee searching for honey that was on her back. I couldn't let her go, for some reasons."

"I'm sorry, I get that." Rose said, sympathetically.

"We fought almost every day, I was such in a helpless situation. She never tried to understand me, only played with me like that. Thinking back, she really affected my mood badly. I was super irritable, cried tons of times, poured my emotions over my siblings whenever they would try to ask things during dinner time. It was this one time where I saw the light, so suddenly. Doniya had screamed at me, and we never do that- she's like the closest sister to me. I realised how I had been treating people around me like trash, and lost friends because of that.. I knew I needed to get rid of that relationship." I said, quietly.

"She had told me she was heartbroken, but a day later she was seen with somebody else. I'm just very happy she's out of my life- I had felt so much better, like a weight off my shoulders." I added, sheepishly.

Rose simply smiled, looking up at the sky. "She didn't deserve a guy like you, at all. I'm happy for you that you feel much better, now."

"Thank you." I answered quietly, gazing at her for a while. "What about you, where did you meet him?"

Rose sighed a little, I wondered if the question hurt her. "Uh.. good question." She was quiet for a moment, clearly thinking about it. "I think it was at some activity we went to with my friends. He was the friend of my friend. We had a good relationship, truly, until he cheated."

"Do you know why he cheated?" I wondered genuinely, but blamed myself right away, afraid I had hurt her feelings with the question.

Rose played with her fingers and took a breath, looking at me. "Yeah, he made love to another girl because I hadn't wanted to do that until we would be married."

"Really?" I frowned, something started raging inside of me. "Did he accept your opinion before that?"

"He did, he told me I never had to worry about it because he loved me for who I was." Rose looked away. "He said he understood, that he respected my choice, but the next thing I knew was that he had done that with another girl."

Shaking my head, I bit my bottom lip in order to keep filthy words inside. "I'm so sorry, you don't deserve it. That guy is sick." I couldn't understand it.

Rose smiled at me, pushing her finger upon the tip of my nose for a brief moment. "Don't worry about it. I'm more than okay now- he wasn't worth it. I had been really angry before, but I put everything behind me, it's better like that."

I smiled at her strength. "I understand you- he wasn't worth your anger either. You didn't have to put more energy into him than you already did. Some people just don't want to get it through their thick skull."

"For real. I still see him sometimes, but he never dares to look into my eyes." We both laughed at that, I admired the way she had coped with all of it, and I- personally- would've only wanted her happiness.

Reaching for my phone, I put on some soft music, silently listening to it for a while. It took me a moment to feel that Rose had been staring at me for quite some time, so when I looked back at her, I said "what?"

"So.. you only fall in love with musicians?" Her voice sounded somewhat shy. A warm feeling crept up my body, rising to my cheeks. I wondered if this was another sign that maybe she liked me, in some ways.

Staring right back into her eyes, I answered, "I certainly do not."

Because, let's be honest here, Rose. Are you a musician? I thought to myself.

We both smiled and then, a new song came on. It was a song about realistic love. Rose knew it, so did I. We listened to it and as the words processed into my mind, I could suddenly relate to it so much. I was a guy with a sickness, not a guy with some unrealistic powers or things we all wanted to have. I wasn't special, I was far from being legendary, something all those people described in the song were. Girls would always choose healthy guys over me, as I was sick.

Rose hummed along with the song, then started singing along a little with her sweet voice and her eyes glued to my face, "So where'd you wanna go? How much you wanna risk.."

Looking back at her, many questions and thoughts raced through my mind. How much did I want to risk? Clearly, there was a chance that the sickness would take over completely, taking me away from the earth. Would I risk it all and finally admit to myself that I had grown feelings for her? Would I risk it to express those feelings and make something out of it if she felt the same about it? Was it too soon? Too unrealistic?

"I'm not looking for somebody with some super human gifts, some superhero, some fairytale bliss. Just something I can turn to, somebody I can kiss.." Rose sang, her voice barely above a whisper. Smiles curled upon our lips, eyes connected.

Scooting closer to her, I started singing along with the song, the two of us gazing at the endless sky.