Zayn

I woke up when I had the feeling I couldn't breathe anymore. My eyes were open in a split second and I started gasping for air. My chest was rising and falling rapidly and my lungs hurt. I wanted to scream for my mum, but nothing came out. I felt like I was going to die any second, without anyone around me, I would die all alone.

A moment later, I started choking, but it caused me to breathe well again as coughs started to form. I couldn't stop coughing for a while and I quickly sat up. Sweat was dripping down my body and it wouldn't surprise me if there would appear a puddle around.

I coughed and coughed and the nausea filled my whole entire body, causing my food to go all the way up and leave my mouth for a few seconds long. The gross looking substance fell down on the floor right beside my bed and the smell of it made me even more nauseous.

"Mum! Mum!" I yelled.

Before I knew it, she was in my room and she rushed her way over to me. "Come here, love. You're okay, you're alright." She calmed me and started taking off my pajamas.

"Mum, I couldn't breathe." I wrapped my arms around her neck and laid my head on her shoulder. I needed her comfort.

She wrapped her arms around my bare but still sweating torso and she hugged me tight, pressing several kisses to my head. "You're alright baby."

"No, no, no, mum." I kept shaking my head and I hummed in shock, confusion and sadness as a tear rolled down my cheek without realizing it.

"Calm down sweetheart. I'm here. I won't leave you." She rubbed my back soothingly and I closed my eyes for a while.

I felt extremely confused and I was scared because of what had happened. I didn't really understand what happened as it went way too fast. I couldn't think clearly and it was driving me insane.

My grip around my mum became tighter and she noticed it. She started kissing my cheek softly and kept rubbing my back until I started to calm down a bit. My heart was still beating like crazy but I told myself to stay calm.

"Mum."

"I'm here." She replied softly, pressing more kisses to my face. "I'm always here, okay? Always."

I nodded and closed my eyes again, feeling myself finally completely relaxing because of her hug. Until she wanted to go away, "I'm going to clean your floor and then I have to make lunch."

I stared at her in confusion for a while, "But mum.. we're supposed to eat breakfast in the morning, right? What happened to my brain?"

My mum smiled at me and stroked my cheek softly, "Yes, but it's already afternoon. You slept a very long time, Zayn. And nothing is wrong with your brain."

"Then what happened, mum?" I said quietly as I wiped my eyes, still feeling strange because of the way I woke up. Only then I noticed I was at home and not in the hospital.

She stayed quiet for a while and stared at me. "It was probably just your saliva.. don't worry about it too much, okay? It's over. You're fine." She pressed a kiss to my forehead and I closed my eyes as she did so.

"Okay," I almost whispered. Then I realized something, "Did you give Rose something to eat and where did she sleep? She's still here right, mum? Where's she?"

I fell asleep after dinner as I wanted to take a small nap in bed, but never woke up until now, much more than 12 hours later. I couldn't believe I had slept that much but I did know that I was very tired. This caused that I didn't give Rose a home tour, didn't bring her to the room she would sleep in, and couldn't give her food even if it was my mum's job. Now that I was home I felt the need to take care of her instead of that she would take care of me.

Mum smiled, "She's all good Zayn. She slept in the guest room and she even slept in. Rose ate breakfast as well and spent the morning with your sisters. Right now, she's probably downstairs."

"Okay.. what are we going to do today?" I rubbed my eyes. Christmas was still a few days away so we could spend some time before all my family would come over. They were all excited to see me and I was excited to see them again but I also knew it was going to take me a lot of energy.

"Feel free to do whatever you want, sweetheart. Dad is at work but all of your sisters are home. And Rose, of course. We don't have a planning." She said.

I slowly laid back down and stared at the ceiling as I brushed my finger over the soft fabric from the waistband on my underwear, "I don't feel well."

"Then stay in bed, love." My mum frowned a little and pressed her hand to my forehead. "I think you have a slight fever. You're warm."

"I don't want to stay in bed mum. I'm finally home, I can do whatever I want. I'm not stuck in a stupid hospital room." I smiled at her and sat up, placing my feet on the floor after I made sure I wasn't going to stand into my own puke.

My mum smiled, "That's true. Now why don't you take a shower and I'll clean this all up? Then when you're done, you can eat lunch."

"Okay, mum."

After I went to the toilet, I took a long and warm shower, feeling super relaxed yet extremely warm after that. I wore my simple black beanie, black shirt but denim jeans.

I applied some of the creme I still had on my cheeks as it had reduced but it still wasn't completely healed. The one cheek was still redder than the other one and I didn't really like it.

When I was done I finally went downstairs and my eyes immediately searched for my Rose. I heard her sweet laughter filling my ears and when I looked in the direction the beautiful sound came from, I saw her playing a game with my two sisters.

She looked different. I was used to seeing her in her nursing outfit. She was even more beautiful in her own clothes.

Her long hair was let down and it naturally fell over her shoulders and chest. The clothes she wore fitted her really well and it made me understand even more why I liked her.

I walked over to the table and Doniya spoke up, "Good evening, Zayn." She said sarcastically.

"It's afternoon." I mumbled, sitting down at the table and staring at the game as they were playing 30 seconds.

My eyes met Rose's dark ones and we exchanged smiles. Of course, being the nurse she actually was but also because I just knew she cared about me, she spoke, "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. Thanks Rose." I smiled slightly but frowned a little when I saw her sudden concerned expression.

My sisters decided to start a conversation themselves so they wouldn't listen to ours. She pointed at my mum, "She explained me what happened.. are you okay?"

I nodded, "Yeah, Rose." I said genuinely. "I calmed down." I wasn't going to tell her that I was scared. I didn't want anyone to worry about me.

"Okay." She sighed in relief, "Did you sleep well?" Her smile made me smile as well.

"Yeah, quite long I think." I bit my lip as I stared at the clock.

Rose chuckled, "Don't worry about it. Your bed must've been really comfortable."

"Yeah, it was." I laughed softly and looked at my sister as she was starting to speak up.

"I don't mind that you woke up this late. At least we all got time in the bathroom. Trust me, Rose, he always needed so much time in the morning it was unbelievable. Always looking if his hair was styled well." Waliyha laughed.

"Hey! I was a teacher. And besides, you don't have to worry about it because we don't have that problem anymore." I snatched my beanie off my head and twirled it around my fingers.

My sister became quiet and quickly looked down at the game cards. Rose stared down as well as she was picking on her nails. I didn't really understand if I said or did something wrong but I slowly pulled my beanie over my head again.

Doniya looked up at me with a slight frown on her face, "Are you sure you're okay? Your face is flushed red."

I rubbed my face and looked back at her, "I'm fine." I shrugged, though I wasn't actually sure if I really felt fine. The situation of this morning made me feel weird and I did feel like I had a slight fever. I just didn't really know.

"Okay." Doniya shrugged.

My mum told my sisters to stop the game as we were going to have lunch. I changed chairs and sat down beside Rose, wanting to hold her hand but I didn't do it. I still didn't know if we had something or not. I mean, I never asked her so it probably meant that we had kissed and that was it.

I bit my lip as I was deep in thoughts and I barely heard my mother call my name. Just then I noticed that Rose was holding out my small plastic bag full of pills in front of my face.

I took them and made sure I 'accidentally' touched her soft hand. "Thanks Rose." I said quietly while a small smile crept on my face. She was still taking care of me, even when we were home.

"Of course." She said while returning the smile sweetly.

I watched as my mum sat down across the table and she folded her hands as she started to pray for our meal. I knew Rose was used to that as well so it made me happy, knowing she might feel more at home.

We then started eating and while my sisters started talking to Rose, I slowly swallowed down all the pills I still had to take for nobody knows how long.

I noticed my mum looking at me all the time and I wasn't exactly sure why. She probably felt that I didn't feel well. I just didn't want to admit to it as I wanted to spend today with Rose, and not in bed. That was something I did all the time at the hospital.

"Zayn," She whispered. My eyes met my mother's warm ones and she stared at me for a while. "You can rest. Don't let anything stop you now. We still have enough days to spend together."

I sighed, finished my sandwich and stood up. She was right. We still had enough days and I might feel better after taking another nap.

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The end wasn't as interesting, but I just didn't know what to write.

I went to my uncle and cousins yesterday and saw my aunt. She looked so beautiful. It was her, but at the same time it wasn't her. It's so weird that you can literally see her soul left her body..

I'm still grieving and extremely sad. No one will ever fill the emptiness that has appeared in this situation.

What contains the updates- I'm trying. Thanks for all your sweet messages. They meant so much to me!