Zayn

"Caroline!" I yelled, covering my mouth after that and staring at the floor in utter confusion and nerves as blood dripped from my hands onto it.

I coughed again, causing more blood to leave my mouth. "Caroline!" I yelled again, sitting down on the floor and wiping my mouth several times.

Caroline came rushing into my room and looked at me with a concerned expression. "What happened, Zayn? Are you alright?"

I showed her my hands and slowly stood up. "I don't know. I coughed up blood."

She walked over to me and placed her hand on my back and guided me towards the sink. "Come, love, wash your hands first." She opened the tap and I washed the blood and saliva off my hands.

My heart was beating like crazy because of what had happened and I didn't know what was wrong with me.

"Can you open your mouth for me?" Caroline asked. I opened my mouth and she slightly tilted my head back so she could look into it.

I licked my lips after that and sighed sadly. I was scared that it was something really bad. I mean, I already had Leukemia, so what could be worse, right? But still.. what if this was a really bad sign? A sign that made clear there was no chance of healing anymore?

"We should visit the doctor's office, love. Don't be scared though, okay? Just for a check up, to make sure everything is alright." She softly pushed me towards the door and I reluctantly left my room.

I bit the inside of my cheek, "Are you sure it's nothing bad?"

"I don't know, Zayn. He's more specialized in things like this. I do know a few reasons for it but it doesn't make sense with your sickness. Let's just see what the doctor thinks of it, yeah?" She assured me, but it didn't calm me one bit.

We stepped inside the small check up room and the doctor greeted us right after. "Good morning. So, Zayn, you needed a check up I heard?"

I frowned and looked at Caroline. I thought she just decided it, but he made it sound like it was already planned.

Caroline glanced at me and sat down on a chair, losing eye contact with me. She planned it. But why?

"He coughed blood just now and he woke up bathing in sweat. When I was cleaning his wound yesterday I noticed bruises all over his upper body. I don't know what it's like on his lower body." Caroline said, making me frown even deeper.

That's why she was staring at my chest like that. That's why she wanted to see my back and touched it. She saw bruises. Why didn't I see them? And more importantly.. why didn't she tell me?

The doctor looked concerned, "Can you take off your clothes, Zayn? I want to examine your body."

I didn't reply. I just started to take off all of my clothes until I was in my underwear only. I stared at my chest and belly, seeing the slight bruises on my skin.

The doctor stood up and examined it. He pressed his fingers to my skin, just like Caroline did and I stared down at the floor, feeling sad because of all of this.

He turned me around and started looking at my back and legs then turned me back around. "Do you have them on your hips as well?"

I slightly pulled the left side of my underwear down and showed him my hip, noticing a small bruise. I then pulled down the right side but didn't notice one.

"Time for blood tests and maybe even an urine test." He walked over to some drawers, opened one of them and took out a small transparent plastic box.

He handed it to me, "You have to urinate in this so we can do research on your symptoms. You can go to the toilet over there, I'll close the curtain."

I didn't understand why I had to pee now, but something told me that my symptoms weren't good at all and he wanted to find out soon.

So I stood in the corner of the room in front of the toilet and waited until he closed the curtain. I waited and waited but nothing seemed to come out. Finally, after what felt like minutes, I started peeing and filled the small box in no time. I carefully closed the small box and walked back over to the doctor, handing it to him.

"Thank you, Zayn. Stand on the body weight scale, please. I'd like to know your weight." He pointed at the grey square in front of him and I stood on it, waiting for the numbers to pop up.

He glanced at it and typed it down in my patient file. "Is it bad?" I asked him.

"You lost a bit of weight, but it's not an amount to be concerned of, so don't worry about it." He assured me with a smile.

He typed things down on his computer and it stayed quiet for a while. This time I didn't feel comfortable with it. I just felt that things weren't right. It may not be really bad, but I couldn't calm myself.

I looked down at my bare feet and waited for him or Caroline to say something. When I looked up at her, she was only staring at me in concern.

"Alright, I'd like to make an ECG, which is electrocardiography, meaning basically a video of your heart. It all sounds heavy but don't worry, it's just to see how it's working." The doctor smiled. I didn't understand how he was so calm about all of this.

"Can you lie down?" He pointed at the table/ bed and I lied down on it, watching him as he rolled a small table with the computer on it towards me.

He grabbed the stuff he needed and he started attaching a lot of stickers to my skin all over my chest. The stickers all had a thin string underneath it, which were all attached to the computer. Those thin strings would give through the impulses my heart was giving and it would be shown into a video on the computer.

I stared at the screen and saw my heart activity. It looked good in my eyes, but I obviously wasn't a docter so I couldn't really know.

The doctor slowly nodded his head, "It's looking good, Zayn."

After five minutes the full video was made and he detached all the stickers from my chest. He told me that I could, finally, wear my clothes again so I quickly slipped on my pants and shirt, sitting down on a chair beside Caroline as I felt a little tired.

"We're going to do some blood tests today but we will do more scans another day, is that alright? I don't want to wear you out today. You seem pretty shocked by what happened this morning, aren't you?" The doctor said.

I shrugged then frowned slightly, "Isn't it something to feel shocked about? It's not good, is it?"

"Obviously not, Zayn. But know that it's not as bad as it seems. Don't worry about it. It sometimes happens with Leukemia. One of the symptoms is bleeding after all." He said seriously. It calmed me down. I knew he'd tell me right away if something was really wrong.

I breathed out in relief and let it all sink in. I coughed up blood this morning, but it was a symptom. It wasn't as bad as it seemed like, so he told me. I felt better. I needed to push the negative thoughts aside now and stop worrying about it so much.

"But do you agree? Blood tests today and scans another time?" The doctor asked again.

I nodded, "Yeah, that's fine."

"Great. I'll grab the needed stuff. I'll be back soon." He said, then left the room we were sitting in.

I stared down at my lap as I played with my fingers. I sighed deeply and wished that my mother was here for a few seconds. It may sound childish, but she really was the most important person in my life. I'd be nowhere without her and she was the one who could comfort me in the best ways. Just her mother love, which every person needed.

Caroline placed her hand on my back. "You'll be fine, Zayn. I promise. You're strong."

"Am I?" I flexed my muscles, pouting when I saw my muscles in my arm had decreased enormously.

She laughed and pinched my muscles softly. "They'll come back. I know so. You were such a sportive guy, working out a lot, right?"

"Yeah, all for nothing." I joked, chuckling softly while pushing all the negative thoughts aside. They didn't make sense anyway.

"Oh well, who's there to impress anyway, right? Rose already likes you." Caroline wiggled her eyebrows.

I gulped, "Rose likes me?" I really couldn't believe so. I mean, maybe I figured it a little as she had been acting a little like it before, but was it all confirmed already?

Caroline's eyes slightly widened, "I don't know. I was joking." She said quickly, straightening her nurse uniform jacket and sitting up straight.

"Oh." I said, feeling slightly disappointed. I turned my face to Caroline again. Was she really joking or did she know more than me? Caroline sadly didn't give anything away so I went back to staring at my lap, hoping that all of this was true.

The door swung open and the doctor stepped inside with the needles and small tubes where my blood would drip into.

He sat down in front of me and took the first needle out of its package. "Alright, you already know it stings a little."

He rubbed the place where he would pierce the needle in and looked for the right vein, slowly pushing the needle inside. I felt a small stinging pain but it was gone in a split second and I didn't really care about this pain. It was nothing compared to what I had been through.

I watched as the first small glass tube was filling up with my blood and I chuckled softly, "What if I was a vampire? I'd want to drink it all." I said, watching as he added the second tube to the needle.

"Zayn.." Caroline said, failing when she tried to hide her laugh. "You're something else."

"You're the only one who weirdly enough finds this satisfying." The doctor mentioned, chuckling as well.

I smiled, watching as he added the third- and last tube. "Oh well, what's the fun of only thinking about the negative things when you can see positive things in it as well?"

I looked up and saw the doctor and Caroline exchanging glances while they were both smiling. I didn't really know why so I joined them and smiled as well.

He carefully placed the tubes in a small plastic bag and wrote something down on a sticker, sticking it to the small bag. "Okay, this is going to the lab, along with your urine."

"I hope they're wearing caps to protect their nose." I said, making him frown slightly as he didn't understand what I was trying to say.

"My urine." I chuckled, making both of them laugh and shaking their heads.

The doctor sighed softly, "I don't know what they've put into either your pills or tube feeding, but I'm liking it."

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