Chapter 62: Cloud of Despair
Mariana packed her water bottle into her sports bag. She wore a light black hoodie and a pink tank top. Even though she tried to be joyful for her Zumba session, she couldn't get her mind in good spirits because having to see Electra too often and too near to what belonged to her. With someone like Micah, Electra will have to kill her first to ever get to him.
She forcefully pulled the zip along the bag and swung it quite quickly on her shoulder. She straightened her leggings and pulled them up a little. They felt so comfy which made her want to rub her legs over and over again.
She gave herself one look in the mirror, and gave a little twirl. The leggings hugged every inch of her legs and her butt nicely. She rested her hands behind her thighs and slowly slid them up, around her bum as she jiggled it a little. The material made it feel so smooth and firm.
She slapped her ass a little before finally deciding to leave before it's too late. But before that, she made sure Rio's bowls were all clean and his litter was fresh.
When she got there, she placed her bag down and walked sluggishly to the group. Her arms hung lazily on her side and she was now thinking that it would have probably been a better idea if she had stayed at home, because she felt like she was dragging weights along her legs, and boulders were being dropped on her shoulders.
A sigh of breathlessness and exhaust swiftly ran out of her lips. All this heated up anger drained the energy out of her. But she couldn't help to as the feeling of some random, worthless woman trying to take her man away was the most infuriating thing. It was like an insult to her well-grounded relationship.
Even though they won't succeed, just the thought of someone trying to take your beloved away from you and replace your spot, made you want to grab your hands onto them, gripping them tight, like a rock climber clinging onto their rope, so that nobody can ever take them away like that. Or your brain starts thinking of all the infinity and brutal ways that you could hurt or get rid of them for good, sometimes they don't deserve it, sometimes they do like in this case, for even thinking that they could try and take them away.
But the best thing after that is you can have your love all to yourself again, with no one else threatening near, like missiles designed for destruction.
That is exactly how she felt about Micah, she wanted to hold on to him so as long as he is with her, Electra can't do anything. Since he had been the best person to treat her with such kindness, more than she has ever received from anyone in her life.
And when someone like that enters your life like that so drastically, you don't want to let them go, especially when they have seen everything you have been through and stuck with you through the storm. He really saw her at her worst, when she nearly died in his arms, and soon she will be at her best, when she could finally restore peace to her inner self.
She sighed again because she knew that would be impossible. She couldn't be with Micah all the time but she hoped he was at least safe from her.
She followed Amell's steps of the salsa warm-up but instead of her energetic self, she went more slower than usual, her movements more dream-like, as if she was walking across a lucid world of vivid dreaming. Her feet was as dainty as a ballerina, her arms flapping like a butterfly in slow-motion. But she got tired quickly and dropped them, it seemed like her feelings were stronger than her strength at this time.
When they had finally finished, Mariana sat at the bench and took her bottle out. She laid down a bit and began drinking like she was a baby. Even when she held on tightly to the plastic, it seemed to be slipping off because she was almost out of energy, despite doing the bare minimum.
"Mariana, can I talk to you for a minute?" Amell said, slowly coming to her.
Mariana looked up at him with a hint of suspicion in her looks, but she just shrugged and nodded while still drinking her water.
Amell freely took a side beside her. At first glance, she looked completely fine, but when you really peer into the complexities of her expression, you can see the tiny drops of tears that just laid on the edge of her eyelash.
"Are you feeling alright? I noticed you weren't your usual active self."
"Is it that obvious?" She chuckled to herself and sipped some more.
"Yeah, you looked very distracted and your mind seemed so far away."
She started laughing a little but in reality, she was crying inside.
"No—I'm—I'm fine, just some problems in my personal life."
"Oh, do you want to talk about it? I don't mean to intrude but it might help a bit letting it out then bottling your feelings in."
Mariana sighed and then slowly put her water down. He was right in a way and all this built-up jealousy made her so aggravated.
"There's this person..." she began, her hands shaking as she rested her head against her knuckles. Her voice cracked quietly as she stared dead ahead at the dullish studio floor.
"She had been intervening in my relationship for quite some time and now... it-it's just getting too much..." She concealed her face within her palms, as if unable to face the hidden fears in her reality. She rapidly shook her head as if she was trying to convince herself of something.
"I love my boyfriend and I never felt anything like I do for him before..." Tears started crumbling within as she felt a knot tightening around her throat, making it harder for her to speak. Although she didn't want to cry in public, her body seemed to have hated her as it always wanted to work against her.
"Lately I've kinda been acting extra clingy and possessive toward him but I just don't want him taken away!" She burst out crying. She turned away from Amell as she didn't want him to see her in this state.
"I'm sorry for how you feel Mariana," he said and patted her back. She still faced away from him but his pats did feel comforting.
"I used to feel the same way. There was this girl I used to see called Charlotte. She was the most beautiful girl I've ever laid my eyes upon." His eyes then entered into this dreamy state, as if he was going back to a blissful memory. He took a thoughtful glance at Mariana, before a realization came into his head.
"Actually, she kinds of looked like you but anyway, my behavior was similar to yours. I was extremely insecure and I was being a bit too over-protective and wanted her all to myself. I wasn't even comfortable with her hanging out with her own friends or even with my own family..." he admitted with embarrassment shimmering in his cheeks.
"How come?"
"I don't know but now I know that I shouldn't have done that, and my actions ended up pushing her away into someone else's arms..." he lamented with regret sunk in his eyes like a broken ship.
"Oh..." Mariana said with a worried look.
"The point I'm trying to make is don't push too hard Mariana, and try not to be too possessive because it will only make things worse."
"True." Mariana nodded slowly to the side.
"I miss Charlotte everyday of my life," he said, bringing out a small slip of paper and unfolding it. It revealed a sky-blue picture of a young woman, with a round face that was fresh like spring, brown hair in two pigtails, and blue eyes that were even more majestic like sapphire.
"Don't let the same thing happen to you Mariana."
"Thanks Amell." She gave him a smile of gratitude and then got up. She grabbed her bag and walked out of the studio.
Once she was outside, she got her phone out and tried calling Micah by FaceTime. Luckily he answered and she made sure that she stopped crying before she spoke.
"Hey Micah." She tried to make her voice seem normal but her throat wouldn't cooperate and it made it croaky like she had a cold.
"Hello Mariana!" He said in a cheerful manner as he waved at her.
"What are you currently doing?"
"Trying to play chess with Mylah. I said that if she wins, I'll give her some money but it doesn't look like she's gonna win so she's getting angry at me."
He then switched the camera over to where Mylah was sat opposite him, wearing a pink hoodie, and angrily slurping a smoothie. Mariana could hear her loud grumbling and almost giggled at it.
"Aw that's nice." She smiled as she could see they were having fun. It gave her a sense of peace.
"Hey that reminds me. Would you like to come over this evening? We are going to be making s'mores over a fire."
"Okay, I'll come!" She said and then bid him goodbye. She slipped her phone back into her pocket and there was a new glow that spread like sunshine across her face. She was feeling so much happier and she rushed back home to prepare for what she would wear late on.
A/N: Hey I hope you enjoyed the chapter!
Here's a little fact👀: that possessive speech is from my personal experience hehe.
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