Chapter Twenty-two

My moaning and panting form leaning on the side of a series of lockers while Jimin's crouching form was in between my legs, face hidden under my skirt, his shoulder carrying one of my leg and was bringing me to our own heaven and inferno, all too caught up with the pleasure that we were forgetting where we were…

It all now came back to my now devastated and worried state as we watched it all in a fifteen-second video.

Nakatalikod na nakaluhod sa Jimin sa video pero hindi maipagkaka-ilang siya ang lalaking nagpapaligaya sa akin dahil sa blonde niyang buhok. Kahit sinong makakapanood ng video ay maiisip na kaming dalawa iyon!

I was even weirded out to watch my own self in a what seemed like a pornography that would probably ruin all of what I had achieved in this school or even my life outside.

Walang ibang content maliban sa video na iyon, walang text message mula sa unknown sender at walang ni kahit na isang letra. It was like the video was sent to the both of us just to scare the hell out of us. I couldn't even think of anyone who would have any reason to do that. Wala naman akong kaaway o kagalitan sa school na ito, sure, may ilang mga babae ang may lakas ng loob na irapan at ismiran ako pero wala akong nakaka-away.

Sa nanginginig na mga kamay ay naibagsak ko ang phone ko sa mga hita ko matapos kong mapanood ang video sa ikatlong beses, malakas ang kabog ng dibdib ko sa takot at kaba at naninikip ang lalamunan ko dahil sa galit.

I felt the corners of my eyes water but I didn't dare let it stream. I felt my throat throb for outburst for I didn't dare let it out. Instead, I just let my heart hurt me.

"East—" He stopped when I quickly raised my head at his direction.

Matalim ang tinging ipinukol ko sa kaniya kaakibat ng mga nanlalabo kong mga mata. My vision of him was blurry but the pain in my heart was very vivid, my fists that clutched my phone went gripping tightly as my teeth clenched hardly.

Like the usual, dito sa leisure room kami madalas nagtutungo sa tuwing mayroon kaming problema. We always settled everything here, sometimes through talk and sometimes through other adulterated things. But not now, we were not having any of it now 'cause I was not in a very good shape, I might just hurt him.

"W-We'll find the sender—"

"That'll be useless. We're caught, Jimin!" malakas kong sigaw para putulin ang sinasabi niya, masyadong magulo ang takbo ng isipan ko para mag-isip pa ng ibang bagay dahil ang tanging nangingibabaw lang sa isipan ko ngayon ay ang katotohanang may nakaka-alam na ng sikreto namin.

That… that was so terrifying and very frustrating.

Naka-upo na ako sa couch pero pakiramdam ko ay babagsak pa rin ako sa panghihina. Ang mga kamay kong mahigpit na hawak ang phone ko ay unti-unting lumuwag ngunit mas nanubig lang ang mga mata ko, nakatitig sa mukha niyang puno ng paghihirap.

It was like looking at him was like looking at the mirror, it was damn obvious that we were both afraid of what was entailed of this. His small eyes couldn't hide his obvious fear, the way his plump lips parted couldn't tell anything but fear and the way his eyes shivered while staring at me could perfectly match the fear in my heart.

We were both afraid, and I had never seen him this afraid before.

"Hannan, you know I won't let anything bad and harmful come your way. I've been trying to fix this—"

"You have been?!" I horrifyingly asked him, confusion ringing my voice and my blurry eyes staring skeptical at him. "Since when did you know about this, Jimin?"

Nanlalaki ang mga mata niya na para bang napantanto niya ang mga binitiwan niyang salita, natigil siya sa pagsubok na hawakan ako dahil tila napako na siya sa kinatatayuan niya.

Now that was suspicious.

I narrowed my eyes at his frozen form as I quickly stood up, my unprepared balance instantly getting into me causing me to stumble down. Napahawak ako sa mga balikat niya nang mabilis siyang nakalapit sa akin kahit na sigurado akong halos hindi na siya makagalaw sa kinatatayuan niya kanina.

He managed to catch me before I fell, but it still hurt. The feeling of his soft hands, tightly holding my waist hurt.

It hurt 'cause it felt like ages ago since the last time he had held me like this.

Mabilis siyang nakalapit sa akin at agad na nahawakan ang baywang ko para mapigilan ang pagbagsak ko. His sweet and minty scent that I had missed so much immediately creeped within my nose and his nearness instantly triggered something within me.

I missed him and having him this close couldn't give justice to what I felt.

"J-Jimin." Nanginig ang mga labi ko at nabasag ang boses ko nang banggitin ko ang pangalan niya.

Siguro nga sobra ko siyang na-miss kaya iwinaglit ko muna sa isipan ko ang mga problema at gulo at agad na hinila siya para mayakap. Isiniksik ko ang mukha ko sa leeg niya at hinayaang tuluyan nang maglandas ang mga luha ko maging ang mga hikbing kanina ko pa pinipigilan.

I felt him freeze in my arms for awhile before I felt his pair of strong arms go wrapping tightly around my waist, gently pulling my body closer to him and softly lifting me a bit. I let his other hand hold the black of my thighs, gently caressing as if making me feel fine.

Now that I was holding him tight, now that I was back in his arms and now that I could again feel every damn freaking beats of his aloof heart, everything suddenly felt light and fine. As if I could stay in his arms and forget about everything that came our way.

It was him, it was still him that mattered for me in the end.

"Fvck! Fvck playing, fvck holding back, fvck letting them pull you away from me, I missed you! I fvcking missed you, Hannan!" he whispered to my ear while grunting loudly, his hard yet hot profanities pained my still drumming heart but I couldn't deny that I missed it, I missed his rude tongue—no pun intended.

I missed how he always spat curses with grunts every time he was frustrated, annoyed or confused. I missed them. I missed him.

Hinigpitan ko ang yakap ko sa kaniya saka ibinulong ang noon ko pa talaga gustong sabihin sa kaniya. "I missed you, I missed you too so much, brute." Idiniin ko ang mga labi ko sa balat ng leeg niya para mapigilan ko ang sarili kong bigkasin ang hindi pa dapat niya malaman.

I could settle for what we had for now 'cause I couldn't afford to lose him.

"Hannan." He called me in a soft yet raspy voice, far from his cursing tone earlier. He softly held my waist and gently tapped a finger on my skin beneath my blazer but I quickly shook my head, hugging him tighter and not wanting to let him go yet.

"No, no, Jimin, let me hug you longer!"

"Neither I will let you go that fast. I just need you to listen to me, hm," aniya saka ko naramdaman ang banayad na pagtataas-baba ng isang kamay niya sa likod ko na para bang ina-assure akong wala siyang balak bitiwan ako.

Marahan akong tumango bilang sagot, dinadama pa rin ang yakap niya pabalik sa akin maging ang mga haplos niya sa likod ko. He was holding me very gently and softly, it was making me cry again.

I didn't care anymore if there was something going on between him and Pauline Alveoli, for as long as he still treated me like I was the most beautiful woman in his eyes, I would hold onto him.

"You might not forgive me for hiding this from you but I just did—"

"They're coming, sure, you don't want them to see you both in that position like you depend on each other, right?" Ang malalim na tinig na iyon ang nakapagpahinto kay Jimin at ang naging dahilan para mabilis akong bumitaw sa kaniya at parang napapasong lumayo.

I even saw how his hands desperately chased me but I was already too far for him to reach, my heart sunk at the sight of how his face fell. I quickly turned to the direction of the deep voice only to see Taehyung Kim comfortably leaning on the door frame while staring blandly at us.

He didn't look mad, neither he was happy.

"What? Not gonna ask me how long I've been standing here? Ganoon sa mga drama, 'di ba?" he said, casually dipping his hands on his pockets. He first glanced at me before staring deeply at Jimin who stood frozen at his ground, now looking calmly at me as if he didn't want to tear his gaze off me.

Hindi ko alam kung nagbibiro ba si Taehyung o nang-aasar pero hindi ngayon ang tamang oras para alamin pa iyon dahil tama siya, gusto ko ngang itanong iyon. Hindi pa nakatulong na tila hindi nababahala si Jimin sa presensiya niya.

Taehyung Kim just saw us hugging, like we depend on each other as he called it and that was not good, I supposed.

"Let's not play around anymore, Taehyung. You know what's happening." Malalim ang pinakawalang buntong-hininga ni Jimin na nagpakunot-noo sa akin.

"I'm glad you can still keep you hands off each other. Oops, or maybe if I haven't came, you could've been having se—"

"Don't make me regret ever telling everything to you, Taehyung!" Jimin spat angrily.

Naguguluhan ako sa takbo ng usapan nila, hindi dahil hindi ko naiintindihan ang ipinupunto nila, kung hindi dahil sa likod ng pag-aangilan nilang dalawa ay nakikita ko pa ring may pagkaka-intindihan sa pagitan nila. Also, all of my assumption with Taehyung just got answered. May alam nga siya tungkol sa amin ni Jimin.

I should be freaking out but Taehyung? Could he really betray Jimin? Mas nakakatakot pa rin kung sino ang nagpadala ng video na iyon.

"You didn't, I caught you." Taehyung stood straight, still his hands dipped in his pockets as he walked towards us.

Pinanood ko nang parang wala lang na tinapik niya ang balikat ni Jimin na muling nakapagpa-buntong-hininga kay Jimin. Seriously, they needed to tell me what was happening.

"Si Kookie pa rin ang gusto nila para kay Hannan…" Nilingon ako ni Taehyung bago siya muling bumaling kay Jimin at magpatuloy. "Kahit ako, pero hindi namin hawak pareho ang mga nararamdaman niyo. Now, it's only a matter of time before that sender could do something worst. It was me first, now Hannan, sino sa tingin mo ang isusunod niya? Maybe, Jungkook?"

I silently gasped. Hindi lang kami ni Jimin ang nakatanggap ng message mula sa unknown sender na iyon! Pati rin si Taehyung at mas nauna siya!

Now I wondered if he had received that same message—video?

"Not happening, Taehyung. Whoever that person is could ruin me, but I won't let that person ruin her." Jimin then stared at me, once again making me feel that everything was going to be fine.

Taehyung was wrong, you don't really need someone to tell you that everything's going to be fine, 'cause you just need someone to make you feel that everything's indeed going to be fine.

Jimin didn't need to tell me, his eyes were all enough to assure me.

I couldn't believe I would ever have to stay away from Jimin now that we were already fine, to distance myself from him again and act like I didn't want him near me in front of our friends and my sister. Ni hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit kailangan naming gawin iyon.

Like, kailan pa sila nagkaroon ng say sa amin ni Jimin?

"No! Why would I need to stay away from Jimin again?!" malakas na singhal ko kay Taehyung nang sabihin niyang kailangang malayo kami sa isa't isa ni Jimin tulad nitong mga nakaraang araw pagdating dito ng iba.

Nilingon ko si Jimin at akmang lalapitan siya nang mabilis na humarang sa akin si Taehyung para pigilan ako, nabangga tuloy ako sa katawan niya. I almost cursed the hell of out his annoying ass when I felt my forehead bumped on his hard chest as his chocolate scent soothed my nose.

Masakit iyon!

"Yah, Tae, distance yourself."

Narinig ko ang malamig na boses ni Jimin sa likod ni Taehyung at nang tiningala ko ang pangahas ay nakangising itinaas niya ang mga kamay niya, ang mga labi ay binat na binat, ipinapakita ang boxy smile niya at bahagyang nawawala ang mga mata niya.

This weirdo!

"Tss, why don't you just marry each other? Best friend my ass. You two seem to be more than that," Taehyung spat sarcastically while stepping out of my way. "I was saying, stay away from each other or let them separate you. Lie-low for now, you have something scary going on, remember?"

Imbis na balak ko pa sanang lumapit kay Jimin at hawakan siyang muli ay napagtanto kong may point naman si Taehyung. Hindi pala coincidence lang ang mga ginagawa nila Ate Milan na paglalayo sa akin kay Jimin, they had been doing it on purpose! Nilalayo talaga nila ako kay Jimin, dahil kay Jungkook!

Damn, how could they?!

"For the mean time, Hannan, hm." Tumango sa akin si Jimin para siguraduhin sa aking hindi naman ito magtatagal.

Maybe I should let them know that I couldn't like Jungkook back.

Nang dumating sina Ate Milan sa leisure ay hindi na ako nagulat nang umirap siya sa akin at halos hindi ako pinansin. I remembered her telling me not to leave Jungkook's side or else she would get mad at me.

Fine, I would admit it didn't cross my mind at all when I received the video, dahil sino ba naman ang makakapag-isip pa ng matino?

Si Jimin lang ang tanging nakita kong magliligtas sa akin sa nakakatakot na pakiramdam na iyon nang makita ko ang video, kasi kahit naman noon pa, lagi akong ligtas kapag kasama ko siya. I could just ignore all the bad things in our way, 'cause having him with me was more than enough.

He was my safety.

"What happened? You both ran out of the auditorium like some couple running off their own wedding. You okay?" Si Kuya Hoseok ang naglakas-loob na magtanong dahil hindi nga ako pinapansin ni Ate Milan.

Si Kuya Yoongi ay dumiretso sa inuupuan kong couch kanina at walang sabi-sabing humiga, Kuya Jin and Kuya Namjoon remained silent at the long table while Jungkook silently stood at the door, staring darkly at me like I had done something bad to him.

I didn't hold responsible over his emotions. Kung nasasaktan ko man siya sa mga ginagawa ko ay hindi ko na kasalanan iyon, it was not like I asked him to like me, it was his fault! So he couldn't look at me like that!

Jimin and Taehyung both held a distance from each other as the latter chose to stand by my side, while I stood tightly clutching my phone with both of my hands over my stomach.

"Baka nakakalimutan niyong hindi mapaghiwalay ang dalawang—"

"Stay out, Taetae. I don't wanna be upset with you too." Pinutol ng mahina ngunit mariing tinig ni Ate Milan ang sinasabi ni Taehyung at halos batukan ko siya nang makita kong agad niyang isinara ang bibig niya at ngumuso.

I thought he was on our side!

Seriously, why were they doing this to us? Kailan pa sila nasali sa isyu namin ni Jimin?

I didn't want to acknowledge that they were all doing this because of their baby boy! Alam kong masyado silang protective and very supportive kay Jungkook, I got it okay, but this was my life and Jimin's life they were butting in! For their information, Jimin and I both had emotions and feelings we both didn't want anyone getting involved with!

"Jimin, you done with that Severino girl?" Ate Milan skeptically asked Jimin.

"Ate M, Cielo Severino's out of this—"

"Oh, so you're telling me that he has been ditching you for another reason? S, halos isang linggo ka naming hindi maka-usap ng matino. Don't tell me that it wasn't because of him." Marahas na bumaling sa akin ang ulo ni Ate Milan kaya bahagya akong napatalon.

"Love, that's your sister…" Kuya Hoseok softly told Ate Milan to stop her from going hard to me.

"I will never put anyone first before Hannan, she'll always come first, Ate Milan," seryosong sagot ni Jimin kay Ate Milan ngunit matalim na tingin ang ipinukol ni Ate Milan sa kaniya.

Gusto ko siyang lapitan at yakapin para ipagtanggol siya sa Ate ko pero nakaharang si Taehyung at naalala ko iyong usapan namin kanina. They said we should stay away from each other, for the mean time.

Only for the mean time.

"I don't get it. We ditched the rehearsal just for their own issue? They're old enough for this shit. Tss, now I'm hungry," Kuya Jin shamelessly said from the table.

Gusto ko siyang tapikin sa likod at pangakuang ililibre ko siya ng lunch dahil sa sinabi niya pero parang gusto ko rin naman siyang kalakadkarin palabas ng leisure room dahil napaka-patay-gutom lang talaga niya.

Wala talaga siyang pinipiling lugar.

"You're always hungry, what's new?" Kuya Namjoon piped irritatedly.

"We have been rehearsing for hours! Ilang minuto na lang at magla-lunch na! Why don't you just let the kids go and let's eat." Kuya Jin raised a thumb at my direction and I didn't know what to do.

Plus, kids? Dalawang taon lang naman ang tanda niya sa akin!

"Kuya Jin!" Jungkook called from the door. He looked too upset while staring at Kuya Jin with his crossed brows and clenched jaw. On his sides, his fists were in a tight ball.

"I get it, Kook. We all get that you like her but we also know that we can't pull her away from Jimin. Taehyung's right, they're inseparable."

For as long as I wanted Kuya Jin to continue, for as long as I wanted him to show that he was on our side, I couldn't afford to see Ate Milan hurt his smart and knowing ass here if he wouldn't stop. Sa paraan ng pagtitig ni Ate Milan kay Kuya Jin ay parang handa na siyang talunin ito at sakalin dahil hindi uma-ayon sa gusto niya ang mga sinasabi nito.

Hindi iyon magagawa ni Ate Milan, but what were the perks? Galit si Ate Milan ngayon.

"And I couldn't watch my sister go mad and very inexplicable every time they're having a problem! Isa pa, my father likes Kookie. What you didn't know…" Ate Milan turned her attention back to me. "Daddy and Mister Jeon met already and for all we know, Daddy could've been thinking something."

I felt my heart fall at that. My lips parted as my eyes slowly darted to the door where Jungkook stood, also surprised. I couldn't hear anything but the loud beating of my heart in pain as it seemed like everyone fell silent because of what Ate Milan broke just now.

Ni hindi ko magawang lumingon kay Jimin dahil natatakot akong makita ang reaksiyon niya. I couldn't afford to see him hurting, neither unaffected.

Bakit naman gugustuhing makilala ni Daddy ang mga magulang ni Jungkook? Alam ko, noong unang beses pa lang niyang nakita si Jungkook ay alam kong may binabalak na siya.

The way he stared and talked with Jungkook, it was like he was looking at someone to whom he could marry her daughter off.

"Jungkook have met Tito Feb?" Jimin's soft and confused voice.

"Yah, the old man's very strict. I'm surprised he didn't rip off Kook's neck. Uhg, scary!" Wala sa sariling napahawak si Kuya Jin sa leeg niya kaya nakatanggap na naman siya ng matalim na tingin mula kay Ate Milan.

"Wala ka ba talagang ibang magandang sasabihin? Parehong-pareho kayo niyang pinsan mong wirdo," inis na sabi ni Kuya Namjoon kay Kuya Jin nang sumabat na naman ito at kung hindi lang mas matanda sa kaniya ito ay baka nabatukan na niya.

"Kung makapagsalita ka parang hindi mo pinsan ang baliw na iyan! Pareho lang tayong minalas dito!" Kuya Jin childishly defended while pointing at my direction as I saw Taehyung frown before huffingly crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"You talking about each other? Hindi ba't ako dapat ang nagrereklamo dahil halata namang ako lang ang may hitsura sa ating tatlo?" Hindi na napigilang sumabat ni Taehyung.

Pinigilan ko ang sarili kong tapikin ang likod niya para i-comfort siya dahil mukhang malapit na siyang mag-tantrum, pero hindi ko napigilang mapangiti ng lihim dahil nakakagaan kahit papaano ang pag-aasaran nila.

"Hitsura ba, 'kamo, Tae? You want me to shove in your face all of my handsome trophies at the admin's office? You talk to this guy, he can maybe enlighten you." Kuya Jin smirked smugly, now pointing Kuya Namjoon from across him.

"Don't let me introduce to the both of you all the girls who're willing to be down on their knees just for my attention, you dumb-asses." Kuya Namjoon clenched his teeth.

Well, that was where anyone couldn't argue anymore. Kung babae lang naman kasi talaga, maraming nagkakandarapa kay Kuya Namjoon dahil bukod sa may hitsura siya ay sobrang talino niya rin. Hindi lang mga babae ang nagkakandarapa sa kaniya, kahit mga sikat at prestihiyosong mga university ay naghahabol sa kaniya. He even got a letter of invitation from Harvard University but he took it down for some unknown and maybe, personal reason.

He could have aced and advanced to a higher level but again, he chose to do it in a normal and slow way. If I knew, ayaw niya lang iwan ang mga pinsan at mga kaibigan niya.

"Tsk, this is useless! Bakit ba kasi isinama ko pa kayo rito e! I should've ditched the rehearsal alone! Magsilayas nga kayo rito! Pati ikaw, Yoongi Min!" inis na sigaw ni Ate Milan, hindi na talaga nakatiis sa pinatutunguhan ng pag-uusap namin.

Sa takot kay Ate Milan ay mabilis na tumayo sina Kuya Jin at Kuya Namjoon at nakuha pang kunin si Taehyung na nasa tabi ko bago sila mabilis na lumabas ng leisure room. Tinapik pa ni Kuya Namjoon ang balikat ni Jungkook na nakatayo pa rin sa may pinto, napatalon tuloy ito sa gulat.

Kuya Yoongi instantly stirred, slowly got up but before stepping out, he said, "Leave them three here. Let them settle their own issue, 'cause everywhere I see, they'll just get stubborn with their feelings. It's a love triangle or maybe, it's a one-sided love for another."

With his hands dipped in his pockets, he coolly left the room, leaving us all something to be confused about.