Chapter Thirteen

There was only one name I would ever call whatever the circumstances I might get stuck up into. Siya lang, ang pangalan niya lang ang tanging ilalabas ng bibig ko at wala ng iba pa.

Jimin, please, save me. I need you, Jimin.

Mahigpit kong niyakap ang sarili ko patagilid habang humihikbi nang mawala si Mint sa ibabaw ko matapos kong isatinig sa isipan ko ang mga salitang iyon. I curled up like a bean while crying so hard.

Takot na takot ako. I thought…

"Fvck you, fvck you, Jeremint!"

"Don't be so aggravated, Jimin! You took her away from me!"

"Fvck, I will kill you! You dared to fvcking touch her?!"

"Says the man so saint! Bitawan mo ako!"

"No, not before I make sure you're not breathing anymore!"

I couldn't really give a damn about what was happening around me anymore 'cause all I could do was just to hug myself and pathetically cry my eyes out.

Naririnig ko ang pagbabagsakan ng kung anong mga bagay at ilang mga sigawan bago ko maramdamang may marahang humawak sa mga braso ko. I slowly raised my blurred gaze up only to see Tita Janna's worried face. Mas napahikbi ako saka bumangon at mahigpit siyang niyakap.

"What's happening? Bakit kayo nag-aaway?!" I heard Tito Nigel's angry but restrained voice.

"Mint." Sumunod ang matigas na boses ni Tito Von.

Hinaplos ni Tita Janna ang likod ko habang pinapaliguan ako ng ilang mga mahihinahon at malalambing na mga salita para patahanin ako. She wasn't throwing questions, only hushing me softly and I couldn't help but cry even more 'cause aside from the fear still lingering within me, it was the first time again I felt a mother comfort after the years my mother died.

"Ssh, I'm here, I'm here baby girl…" She softly told me, still caressing my back.

"Why don't you ask what that good for nothing prick did to Hannan?!" Narinig ko ang galit na boses ni Jimin.

Kinabahan ako bigla. I knew, hindi ko dapat iniisip ang mga ganitong bagay sa kalagitnaan ng gulong ito pero oras na malaman nila ang ginawa ni Mint, magtatanong sila kung bakit niya ginawa iyon at mauuwi kami sa katotohanang matagal na naming itinatago ni Jimin.

That would mess everything more than ever.

I was about to let go from Tita Janna's safe embrace when I heard Mint answer, "She was mine, Jimin. You knew, she was my girlfriend but why the hell did you have to get on our way? It was you who ruined us, kaya huwag kang magmalinis dito!" galit na sabi ni Mint at nang kumawala ako kay Tita Janna, ang malapad na likod na lang ni Mint na papalabas ng silid ang nakita ko.

Pare-parehong natahimik ang lahat na tila tinitimbang ang mga narinig o baka piniproseso pa ang lahat. Ang pagsinok ko ang bumawi ng panandaliang katahimikang iyon. My eyes landed on Jimin and I felt like tearing up again when I saw the blood on the side of his lips.

He was hurt!

"Hannan." I heard Tita Sammie's breaking voice. I saw her sitting on the edge of the bed as she opened her arms for me. Tinapik ako ni Tita Janna para payagan akong lumapit kay Tita Sammie. So I crawled towards the latter and let her arms drape around me.

My mother died. Yes, it hurt me, it wrecked me but I knew I couldn't do anything to bring her back. Nawala man siya ay may naiwan naman siyang mga tao na sobra-sobra ang pagpapahalaga sa akin. It was like she left a part of her to these two women for me. She left her heart, parted it in two all for me.

"I'm sorry, Hannan. I may not know what my son did to you, still I'm so sorry for that." Mahigpit akong niyakap ni Tita Sammie, pinaparamdam sa akin iyong comfort na naramdaman ko mula kay Tita Janna. Isinubsob ko ang mukha ko sa leeg niya habang banayad na sinusuklay niya ang buhok ko.

"I'm sorry, Auntie Sam, but I won't let him get away from what he did to her. Pasensyahan po pero kailangan niyang magbayad." I heard again Jimin's angry voice.

"Son, calm down. Masyado pang mainit ang ulo mo ngayon. Pag-uusapan natin ito, okay? Gel…" Tita Janna pampered her son before calling Tito Nigel.

"No, Mom. You didn't see what he was doing! He almost raped her! Fvck, I will kill him!" Galit pa ring boses ni Jimin bago ako nakarinig ng mabibilis na mga yapak.

"Nigel! Von, follow him! You haven't seen him get angry! It might get worst!" sigaw ni Tita Janna saka ako muling nakarinig ng mga mabibilis na yapak habang unti-unti ko ring nararamdaman ang pamimigat ng mga talukap ng mga mata ko dahil sa marahang paghaplos ni Tita Sammie sa buhok ko.

It pampered my still frightened and shocked heart.

Nagising ako dahil sa biglaang init na bumalot sa akin, pares ng maiinit at matitigas na mga braso ang naramdaman kong pumulupot sa katawan ko habang unti-unti kong naaninag ang pamilyar na pigura. His familiar sweet and minty scent started invading my nose that made me smile a bit.

In the end, he still was the reason of my smile.

"West." I called him in a soft and husky voice because of sleep.

Ngayon nasa tabi ko na siya, yakap ako ng mahigpit at damang-dama ko ang mapayapang tibok ng puso niya sa pisngi ko ay pakiramdam ko, okay na ang lahat. I could just lay relaxed next to him and forget all the things that hurt me.

Ngumuso ako nang makita ang pasang nasa gilid ng mga labi niya at parang gusto ko na namang maiyak kung hindi lang nilukuban ng galit ang dibdib ko. It looked awful and painful. Hindi ako sanay na nakikitang may pasa ang guwapo niyang mukha bukod sa mga pulang markang likha ng mga babae niya.

I slowly raised my hand to gently caress his bruise.

"He d-did this to y-you?" mahina kong tanong sa kaniya sa nanginginig na tinig. Mariin akong pumikit dahil muli ko na namang na-alala ang mga nangyari kagabi.

I knew Mint since we were kids and I couldn't bring myself to believe that he could actually do to me what he did. He might not so kind, he was cold and very distant but he never showed me that side of him before. Pero nang maalala ko rin ang galit na sumasalamin sa mga mata niya kagabi, agad ko rin namang napagtantong lahat ay kayang gawin ng isang tao dahil sa galit.

Just like how I could do anything for Jimin if someone would hurt him and just like how Jimin would do the same for me too.

"Natakot ka siguro kagabi," he said, reciprocating the softness and huskiness of my voice, it almost seemed like he was whispering. Kinuha niya ang kamay ko at hinila para ipalibot ang braso ko sa leeg niya. He placed his hand at the lower part of my back and lightly pulled me closer to him while holding me softly, my face rested on the safety of his chest, letting my ear have more access to hear the beats of his heart. "Don't worry, I already made sure he wouldn't get anywhere near you, east. I'll fvcking raise hell if he ever tries again," he added with assurance.

"Just don't get hurt again, Jimin. You know, I hate to see you hurting," sabi ko habang tinitingala siya.

His small eyes held my gaze too soft and peaceful. "You know, I'll do everything to protect you even if it means, I'll get hurt."

"Jimin," saway ko sa kaniya.

"And you can't argue with that. Now, go back to sleep. May pasok pa tayo bukas." Hinawakan niya ang ulo ko at itinulak pasubsob sa dibdib niya para makatulog na ako. And with his soft and gentle caresses, his peaceful breathing and warm arms around me, sleep again drowned me.

Kinabukasan, maaga kami parehong nagising para maghanda na sa school. Jimin apologized to me for leaving me last night to take a bath on the other room's restroom. Kung hindi raw siya umalis at hinintay na lang akong matapos ay baka hindi na nangayari ang lahat, kaya't habang naliligo ako sa banyo ay nasa labas siya dahil narito pa rin sina Tita Sammie.

Nang bumaba kami sa dining hall ay nagsisimula na akong ma-tense dahil natatakot akong makita si Mint. I thought, after all that happened, I would never get ready to see him again. He scared the hell out of me last night, he made me feel how small I was and made me feet so dirty of myself.

How could he? May pinagsamahan kami at hindi ko akalaing magagawa niya akong pag-isipan ng ganoon.

It wasn't as if I went, straddling different men and letting them have their way in between my legs. Inaamin kong may kasalanan ako sa kaniya, pero wala siyang karapatan para iparamdam sa akin ang ganoon, dahil bago siya, bago pa naging kami, what Jimin and I had been doing came first.

"Hannan! Oh my! Are you fine? I wanted to see you last night but they said you were already sleeping!"

Nang marating namin ni Jimin ang dining hall, hindi ko pa man nakikita kung sino ang mga nasa hapag ay may yumakap na sa akin. Mira's soft body and tall frame immediately towered over me, her sweet scent immediately soothing my nose. Matangkad talaga si Mira at mukhang namana rin ang tangkad ni Tito Von, katulad ng halimaw niyang kambal.

"Let go, Miranda. Your face is reminding me of your twin's face. I'm still very angry about it so back off." Jimin snickered behind me so Miranda instantly pulled away from me.

"Galit din ako sa ginawa niya! Pero sana naisip mo rin kung bakit niya nagawa iyon!" sigaw ni Mira na mukhang na-offend sa sinabi ni Jimin. "I'm sorry, Hannan. You know, he's still my twin brother and I don't want him get hurt though I'm mad because of what he did, really."

"It's fine, Mira. It's not your fault. Just, I don't wanna see him for now 'cause I don't know what I'll feel if I see him." Nginitian ko siya para ipakitang hindi niya kailangang mag-sorry.

I saw her eyes move to my waist just as I felt an arm snake around it. Hinila ako ni Jimin palapit sa kaniya habang mas humihigpit ang kapit niya sa baywang ko. My spine shivered when I felt him give gentle and soft caresses on my side-waist as if calming me all over again.

"And no, Mira. It may be okay for her, but not for me. Kailan ba kayo aalis? Huwag na huwag mong ipapakita sa akin iyang kambal mo dahil baka tuluyan ko na talaga siya." Iyon lang at iniwan na namin si Mira sa threshold ng dining hall at dumiretso na sa dining table.

I felt sad for Mira. Hindi naman niya kasalanan, pero kilala ko si Jimin. He might have got too unreasonable and too over the board for being too angry, I understood 'cause that was how he was since then. Pinsan niya si Mira, at alam kong mahalaga sa kaniya si Mira pero hindi ko rin siya masisisi, involved ako at magkamukha rin talaga si Mira at Mint.

Naroon na silang lahat maliban lang kay Mint. Nakatitig silang lahat sa amin at mukhang naabala namin ang agahan nila.

Napayuko ako dahil ngayon lang bumuhos sa akin na ako ang puno't dulo ng lahat ng gulong ito. At natatakot din akong malaman kung ano ang kinahinatnan ng mga nangyari kagabi dahil nakatulog na ako.

What if Mint already broke to them what Jimin and I had been doing? I didn't even know how the hell did he know. Iyon ang dahilan kung bakit siya nakipaghiwalay sa akin noon, kung bakit niya ako pinaniwalang laro lang ang lahat ng mayroon kami noon para sa kaniya.

I didn't know that he was also trying to work everything out. Just what was happening before?

"Jimin, walang kasalanan si Mira. You shouldn't be that harsh to your cousin…" Tito Nigel told Jimin the moment we occupied our seat.

"Tss, it's not my fault that she has that face, Dad." Jimin loudly hissed but shortly smiled when he turned to me.

"You're so mean! Okay naman na si Hannan! You're overreacting, Jimin!" Nakabalik na si Mira sa puwesto niya sa mesa at inis na inangilan si Jimin. Nakita ko kung paanong hinaplos ni Tita Sammie ang likod niya para pakalmahin siya dahil sa sama ng tingin niya kay Jimin.

"People must know how to get their hands off my treasures! Nagkamali si Mint at hinding-hindi ko siya mapapatawad." Jimin glared back at Mira that if I didn't hold his arm and caress it softly, he would have thrown a fist to the table.

"Jimin, stop it, okay? We already got your cousin punished for what he did and of course, we'll still ask Hannan what she wants to do with Mint and we'll do everything she says. So calm down, okay? You almost killed your cousin last night!" Ang mataas na boses ni Tita Janna ay pinakalma ang hapag pero nang mapagtanto ko ang ibig niyang sabihin ay nanlalaki ang mga matang napatitig ako kay Jimin.

He just stared at me so I turned to Tita Sammie who only looked sadly at me so I panicked for real.

"Where's Mint?" I asked immediately.

"Why are you asking about that prick?" takang-tanong ni Jimin sa akin, salubong ang mga kilay at lumalabas ang mga buto sa panga.

"Tita Sammie…" I pleaded.

Bumuntong-hininga si Tita Sammie pero kalaunan ay ngumiti rin siya. "Don't worry, Hannan. Mint is fine, he's my son but I'd say that somehow, he deserved to get beaten. He's getting punishment, but you see, we still need to hear what you want. Tatanggapin namin."

Tita Sammie was a mother. At kahit pa sabihin niyang okay lang sa kaniya ang mga nangyari kay Mint, kahit na sabihin niyang matatanggap niya ang parusang ipapataw ko kay Mint ay alam kong masasaktan din siya.

Walang ina ang gustong masaktan ang anak nila.

Nilingon ko muna si Jimin na kunot ang noong nakatitig sa akin na para bang sinusubukan niyang basahin ang nasa isip ko bago ako sumagot.

"I…" I heaved a deep sigh before continuing. "I just don't wanna see him, Tita Sammie."

"Ate M, look at Kuya Hoseok, halatang disappointed siya dahil hindi kayo natuloy." I chuckled at my sister while slowly sipping on my melon fruit juice while glancing at the other table on where was BTS and a one new peer, Cielo Severino sat.

We were at school so we were back to what was normal. Girlfriend niya si Cielo Severino rito sa school at kahit na gustong-gusto ko siyang kasama, kahit na hindi pa talaga ako okay ay kailangan kong hayaan siya kay Cielo Severino.

Kuya Hoseok had been frowning at my sister, staring sadly at her like showing how disappointed he was but he couldn't do anything because of what happened.

"Sa akin ka sasabay pauwi, S! Had you gotten home last night, then you shouldn't have gotten to that situation. Oras na malaman ito ni Daddy, paniguradong makukulong ang Mint na iyon!" gigil na sagot niya sa akin habang gigil din pinagtutusok ng tinidor ang waffles na nasa plato niya.

"Please, Ate M. Huwag na nating sabihin kay Daddy. I'm fine, hindi naman natuloy. And I don't think he'll ever give a damn, I don't wanna be disappointed." Bumuntong-hininga ako sa isiping wala namang paki-alam si Daddy kahit na malaman pa niya.

Maybe, he would really send Mint to jail but he would never ask about me. Kilalang-kilala ko siya. Sa ilang taong lumipas na wala si Mommy, hindi na siya kailanman nagpakita ng pagmamahal sa amin ni Ate Milan. And it would only hurt me more to know how he cared less about us or how he cared no more.

"Of course he will! He loves you, S. He loves us! He needs to know!" Medyo tumaas ang boses ni Ate Milan kaya may mga napalingon sa direksyon namin at mula sa kabilang table, nakita kong kunot na ang noo ni Jimin habang nakatitig sa akin.

Nakangiting inilingan ko siya para ipakitang okay lang kami ni Ate Milan ngunit nanatili siyang nakatitig.

Tss, stop staring at me, Jimin or else, I'll just have to pull you away from your bitch and settle you beside me.

"Hey, tone down your voice. Just, he doesn't need to know. I mean, just let this go. This won't happen anymore, I promise." I assured Ate Milan as I turned my attention back to her.

"Oh you better make sure, Sierra Hannan. I just can't imagine the fear you had last night. I might've strangled Mint to death if I was there. Tsk, come here!" naiiyak niyang sabi kaya bago pa siya lumuha rito at mapagalitan pa ako ni Kuya Hoseok ay lumapit na ako sa kaniya na nasa tabi ko lang at hinayaan siyang yakapin ako.

Matatanda na kami pareho, pero pakiramdam ko, kami pa rin iyong mga dating bata na magyayakapan sa tuwing nasasaktan ang bawat isa.

Our mother had raised us, had both taught us that we should always protect each other 'cause sisters do that. Kami iyong magkapatid na umiiyak ng sabay noon sa tuwing isa lang naman sa amin ang napapagalitan. We would always take the blame for each other so in the end, we would get scolded together. We would comfort each other during sad times and laugh together during silly times.

Kaya kung bibigyan man ako ng maraming choices, hinding-hindi ko ipagpapalit ang Ate Milan ko. She might be so boring sometimes, and very naive for her sake, I still loved her so much. Na handa rin akong masaktan, maprotektahan lang siya.

Though I doubt if Ate Milan could really strangle Mint, I meant, literally. She was but a soft and fragile lady.

Sa aming dalawa, mas war-freak ako. Ako iyong kayang manapak ng lalaki at siya iyong kahit mangalmot lang ng isang malanding babaeng lumalandi kay Kuya Hoseok ay hindi niya magawa. She wasn't all but talk, 'cause most of the times, she didn't mean all that she said.

"Ang sweet ng Ate Milan ko," natatawang sabi ko sa kaniya kasi hindi man niya kayang protektahan ako, nandiyan naman siya at handa akong damayan parati.

"Siyempre, 'no! Basta sa akin ka sasabay mamaya, okay? Wala naman kaming lakad ni Hobi e. Try to at least get away from Jimin for a day," she said when she pulled away from me. Huwag na huwag lang talaga niyang ipaparinig iyan kay Jimin dahil magagalit ang isang iyon.

"Oo na, oo na! Pahinging waffles, ubos na iyong akin." Ngumuso ako sa caramel waffles niya saka binalingan ang wala nang lamang plato ko dahil naubos ko na iyong cheese waffles ko. Inirapan niya ako at inabot sa akin ang tinidor niya bago i-usog ang plato sa akin.

When Jimin told BTS and Ate Milan about what happened last night before lunch, of course, they all got infuriated. Kilala nila si Mint pero hindi naman nila ito madalas nakakasama samantalang kilala ni Ate Milan si Mint dahil nga mga bata pa lang kami ay magkakaibigan na kami.

Hindi ako tinantanan ni Ate Milan buong oras ng lunch, kahit nang matapos ang lunch ay sumama siya sa amin nina Jimin at Jungkook para i-hatid ako sa room and of course, Kuya Hoseok would really tag along because of her.

"Okay na ako. Sige na, baka ma-late kayo sa klase niyo." Pagtataboy ko sa kanila nang makarating kami sa pinto habang tuloy-tuloy naman si Jungkook papasok. I was too fvcked up to even mind his rude behavior. May teacher na kasi sa harap at parang walang nakitang nagtuloy-tuloy lang ang kupal sa loob.

Isang halik sa noo ang iginawad sa akin ni Jimin at Kuya Hoseok samantalang halik sa pisngi naman mula kay Ate Milan bago nila ako tuluyang iwan.

For once, I felt the knot in my stomach as I walked towards my seat. Hindi pa rin talaga ako makapaniwalang ganoon kabilis lang nangyari ang lahat. It was just a night and it all went crashing a part of my life. A part of Jeremint Drewford in my life.

I meant, he was once meant something to me. Totoong minsan sa buhay ko, sinubukan kong piliin si Mint para malaman kung mag-wo-work kami. Totoong pumayag ako. He became my boyfriend. Yes, he was, but that didn't mean I discarded Jimin's part in my life those time.

Alam ni Jimin na kami ni Mint. Truthfully, honestly, and seriously, he was very supportive of my relationship with his cousin. Sinabi pa niyang if ever na mag-work out kami ni Mint ay magiging masaya siya para sa amin, that was seven months ago 'cause Mint and I just lasted for five months and we had broken—he ended us two months ago.

I would admit also that I was a sinner. Dahil kahit na kami ni Mint noon, hindi pa rin noon na-hadlang-an ang mga pinaggagawa namin ni Jimin. I meant, we were so fool, so adventurous and so damned. And I couldn't just stop it. I couldn't just let go of it.

Only if Mint didn't just leave like how he did, only if he confronted me, us, then things could have been solved before last night happened. Or last night would have never happened at all. Dahil kaya kong tanggapin sa sarili kong nagkamali ako sa pagpili kay Mint dahil at least, sinubukan ko, namin, at matatanggap ko rin kung magagalit siya sa akin, sa amin ni Jimin dahil mas okay iyon kaysa ang bitiwan ang kung anumang mayroon kami ni Jimin.

I was sorry, but I could let go of everything but not Jimin.