Chapter Eight

Kalagitnaan ng aming huling klase nang maglakas-loob akong ilabas sa bag ko ang phone ko at patagong sinilip ito sa ilalim ng mesa dahil kanina pa ito nag-ba-vibrate para sa mga incoming messages.

Alam ko kung sino ang kanina pang nanggugulo sa akin. I was trying to ignore him plus I couldn't hold out my phone in the middle of the class.

Hindi na ako nasurpresa nang makita ang halos lampas benteng missed calls na nagmula sa iba't ibang numbers, there were unknown numbers but a certain saved number stood out. Doon galing ang pinakamaraming entries plus palagi itong laman ng call entries ko.

Get Lost

I hadn't changed his name yet since I still didn't have time. I didn't know why was he calling me in the middle of the class. Hindi ba makapaghintay ang kung anumang sasabihin niya para bulabugin niya ako ng ganito? Couldn't he see that as an outstanding student, it was not normal if I would be seen holding my phone in the middle of the class?

That brute! May kasalanan pa nga siya dinadagdagan na agad niya!

Nag-angat ako saglit ng tingin sa aming teacher na abala sa pag-di-discuss sa harap ng white board kung nasaan projected ang aming topic. Madilim ang silid kaya hindi naman siguro mapapansin kung magbubukas ako ng ilang messages.

I ignored a lot of messages from unknown sources dahil alam kong puro pagpapansin lang ang mga iyon at na-i-imagine ko na ang galit ni Jimin oras na sumagot ako ng kahit na isa lang sa mga iyon. The brute didn't want me entertaining stalkers—as he called them—'cause he said, boys were only up for hurting girls. At siyempre, hindi ko na tinanggihan pa iyon dahil siya ang living evidence ko.

He was a one perfect example.

Binuksan ko ang thread of messages namin ni Jimin at nakita ko ang ilang unread messages niya. Halos magkakapareho lang naman ang content ng mga iyon at may iisang pinatutungkulan.

From: Get Lost
east

eaaaast

will drive you home

get you later

wait for me kay?

dont go without me

will drive you, Hannan

He was calling just to tell me that he would drive me home. What? He was planning to get his hands off Cielo Severino?

Not that I didn't want it.

Siyempre, ayaw kong makasabay muli si Jungkook dahil hindi ko na naman makakasabay si Jimin pero naiintindihan ko namang kailangang parati niyang kasama si Cielo Severino, it had gone like that with our past prospects too.

Even Arianne Lacerna before, walang araw na hindi niya ito hinatid.

And for as long as I wanted to beat him up because of what I had seen earlier on LSAC Paper na panigurado ay nakita na rin ng lahat, nakita na rin niya at ni Cielo Severino, he should really be with the girl.

Oh baka naman nagkaroon sila ng away ni Cielo Severino dahil doon? The girl must be thinking that he was cheating on her.

"Miss Urduja." I got pulled out from my deep thoughts when I heard my family name being called.

Nag-angat ako ng tingin at nakitang sa akin nakatingin ang aming teacher. Ang mga kaklase ko ay nasa akin din ang atensyon.

"Yes Ma'am?" untag ko saka hawak ng mahigpit sa phone kong nasa ibabaw ng mga hita ko sa ilalim ng mesa.

"I'm assigning you and Mister Wesley to present our next topic, you'll start tomorrow after the quiz."

Napansin kong nakapatay na ang projector at bukas na ang ilaw sa buong silid. Hindi ko namalayang tapos na pala ang discussion. Bumuntong-hininga ako at bahagyang ikinubli ang kaba dahil akala ko ay nahuli na ako.

Tumango ako bago sumagot. "Yes Ma'am."

Matapos iyon ay nag-dismiss na siya. May mga estudyanteng nauna pang lumabas sa aming teacher na nagliligpit pa lang ng kaniyang mga gamit.

"Mister Jeon…"

Lumingon ako sa likod nang tawagin ni Teacher si Jungkook ngunit nagulat ako nang makita kong nasa likod ko pala siya, mariing nakatitig sa akin habang bitbit ang bag niya sa likod niya at may isa pang lalaki sa likod niya na nahihiyang nakatitig din sa akin.

Ibinalik ko kay Jungkook ang tingin ko. What was with the black shade around his left eye again? Nakipag-away na naman yata siya bago matapos ang lunch kanina.

Tss, basagulero.

Kung ako roon sa naka-away niya, I would have pulled out his eyeballs from his eye sockets. That would be better. Hindi man lang kasi nakabawas sa kaguwapuhan niya ang black eye niya at nawawala na naman ang red blazer niya katulad ng madalas mangyari.

Hey Hannan, are you praising the jerk? You're cheating to yourself!

But then, that was an undeniable fact!

"Could you help me bring this projector to the faculty room?" Narinig kong tanong ng teacher, si Jungkook pa rin ang kinaka-usap.

Nagtaas ako ng kilay sa kaniya nang hindi pa rin niya ako nilulubayan ng tingin. He pursed his lips tightly as he sighed, looking so dismayed and disappointed. Nang tinanguan niya si Teacher ay inalis ko na ang tingin ko sa kaniya at inabala ang sarili sa pag-aayos ng mga gamit ko. Nasulyapan ko pa sa gilid ng mga mata ko ang pagdaan niya at nanuot pa sa pang-amoy ko ang mabango niyang amoy.

He always smelled like baby, seriously. Anong shower gel ang gamit niya? Gerber? Johnson's? Baby's Care? Like seriously bakit amoy baby siya parati?!

Tumayo na ako nang matapos akong mag-ayos ng gamit dahil sigurado akong nasa labas na si Jimin. Maingat kong isinabit ang kulay abo kong Givenchy sling bag sa balikat ko. Just as I was about to go, a shaking unfamiliar voice calling my name stopped me.

"H-Hannan."

Lumingon ako. I saw the guy behind Jungkook a while ago standing tall behind me. Nakasuot siya ng salamin at bagsak ang itim na buhok, kaunting parte ng noo niya ay nakikita. Maayos na nakabutones ang polo niya maging ang blazer niya. Ang pagkakasabit ng pulang necktie niya ay maayos rin at sa kaliwang balikat nakasabit ang itim niyang messenger bag.

His getup seemed so odd for me because I was always surrounded by guys with messy getup. Mas sanay akong hindi nakikita ang red blazer at magulong nakalaylay ang necktie. Almost half of the male population in the school were copying BTS styles.

"Yes?" I arched a brow at the guy.

Napanganga siya sa ginawa ko at bahagyang napa-atras.

I saw how his shaking hands held tightly on the sling of his bag. Hindi ko kilala ang halos lahat sa mga kaklase ko pero masasabi kong pamilyar ang isang ito.

"W-When can w-we talk about t-the presentation for tomorrow?"

At talaga pa lang masakit sa tainga kausapin ang mga taong tila nabuhol ata ang dila sa pagsasalita or this man might be thinking I would spank him that was why he was shaking.

Did I like look someone who spanked?

Natanto kong siya malamang ang tinutukoy ng aming Teacher kanina na siyang makakasama ko sa report bukas. I could actually do it alone since that was what I always did but then, sa sobrang gulat kanina ay hindi na ako nakapagprotesta pa.

I always worked alone if possible.

Inilahad ko sa kaniya ang kamay ko. "Give me your phone," utos ko.

Nagtataka man ay sinunod niya ang sinabi ko matapos niyang ipasok ang password. Pagkatanggap ko ay nagtungo agad ako sa memo pad. I typed in my e-mail account and gave back his branded phone that was black in color after.

"Send me the details. Bukas na lang natin pag-usapan ang gagawin." Hindi ko na hinintay pang makasagot siya dahil iniwan ko na siya at lumabas na ako ng silid. Tulad ng inaasahan ay nag-aantay na sa labas si Jimin ngunit hindi siya nag-iisa.

He was with Cielo Severino, and they were laughing together.

Wow, what was this? Balak ba niyang isabay ako sa kaniya kasama ang babae niya?

Hindi pa nangyayari ang ganito noon. I always gave him time for his girls. Madalas talagang nagpapasundo ako kay Manong Selmon sa tuwing may girlfriend siya dahil alam ko namang kailangan niyang ibigay ang oras niya para rito.

Kaya bago ito. Isa na namang first time para kay Cielo Severino.

Tumikhim ako para kunin ang atensyon nila. Unang nakapansin sa akin ay si Cielo Severino. And just like a scared kitten, she stepped backward as she slowly bowed her head, as if she was thinking I would do something bad to her.

Jimin then found my eyes. Umayos siya ng tayo at ngumuso. His pink plump lips protruded, making my suddenly leaping heart choke me.

"Hey east, pumayag si Cielo na isabay ka namin." Jimin casually told me as if it wasn't a big deal.

Oo, sa kaniya hindi. But damn it, why did he have to make it sound like I should be thankful to Cielo Severino for it?! It was not like I asked him to drive me home!

I managed to control my irritation but my fists balled behind me. There was no way I would let myself be a third wheel in their date. Isa pa, Manong Selmon was just a call away. Ewan ko ba kung bakit bigla-bigla ang desisyon niyang isabay ako gayong may girlfriend siya.

Saglit kong sinulyapan si Cielo Severino. Though she was a bit tamed and shy, I couldn't deny her obvious compatibility with Jimin. May ibubuga, rich and beautiful, reserved and proper, but for some reason, I suddenly wished she wasn't this way, so that I didn't have to feel guilty about all this… she seemed nice.

I loosened my fists when I felt a presence behind me plus Jimin's dark and stern stare past me only brought me to turn around. Nagulat ako nang makita ang lalaking makakasama ko sa report ko bukas.

I didn't know his name. And ironic, I was seeing the boy version of Arianne Lacerna. His geek getup didn't save him from my judgemental eyes.

"May kailangan ka… kay Hannan?" mariing tanong ni Jimin sa lalaki, he stared up and down the geek's tall form before pressing his lips together.

I knew when he was like that, he was not pleased.

The geek guy gulped two times as he quickly dragged his stares from Jimin back to me. Kababakasan ng takot ang mga mata niya na para bang may gagawin ako sa kaniya.

Uh, I didn't beat up good and weak boys.

"A-About the report t-tomorrow," he uttered, almost inaudible in a shaking voice.

"Didn't I tell you to send me the details…" Unti-unting bumagal at humina ang boses ko nang may ideyang pumasok sa isip ko. Too shallow to consider but I would take it just to escape the ordeal of having to be in Jimin's car with his girl. Just to escape being a third wheel. Just to escape feeling a hollow deep inside me.

I didn't want this to be added on Cielo Severino's first times with Jimin Park.

Malapad akong ngumiti sa nerd kong kaklase na paniguradong kasama sa top ten ng aming class ranking dahil hindi naman ito itatalaga kasama ko sa isang report kung hindi siya matalino.

Tuluyan ko nang tinalikuran sina Jimin at Cielo Severino at nilapitan si…

"What is your name again?" I asked the guy to spare me from calling him whatever that came in my mind.

That was rude for someone who would save me.

Tila hindi niya inaasahan iyon kaya nakita ko ang panlalaki ng mga mata niya at ang pagbuka ng mga labi niya dahil sa pagsinghap.

"Well, I should know your name since we'll be working for a presentation." I added as I nonchalantly shrugged.

"Wes-Wesley, I'm J-Jackson Wesley," he answered in a low stuttering voice.

Tumango ako saka nakangiting bumaling kay Jimin na ngayon ay hindi na maganda ang timpla ng mukha. Pinid na pinid ang mga labi niyang kanina lang ay kinalulugaran ng ngisi. His sharp glares affected me a bit but I didn't dare show it.

Hindi siya nag-iisip! Kailan pa ako pumayag na makasabay ang mga babae niya? I didn't even want to think that I would be riding at the backseat of his car 'cause Cielo Severino would be sitting at the shotgun seat! Hindi ko mapapayagang mangyari iyon!

"This is so bad! You see, west, something very important came up," simula ko habang pinapanood ang bawat reaksiyon niya. Of course, he wouldn't be pleased. Not when I just took him down in front of anybody. "Muntik ko ng makalimutan. I'll just call Manong Selmon to get me—"

"No." Matigas niyang putol sa akin. Sinulyapan niya ang itim niyang relo sa kaliwang pulupulsuhan niya saka bumuntong-hininga. And with finality, he said, "Thirty minutes. I'll just take Cielo home and then I'll go back here to get you. You should be finished then."

"But Jimin, I thought we're gonna—"

"Not now, Cielo."

Nakatulalang na-itikom na lang ni Cielo Severino ang bibig niya at yumuko.

I suddenly felt bad for her. You really shouldn't go barking against Jimin's words. And seriously, she was too soft for him. Arianne Lacerna seemed too soft too but I didn't see them together like how Jimin was openly showing Cielo Severino to me.

"Jimin, it's fine. You can spend time with her. Magpapasundo na lang ako kay Manong Selmon," I assured him 'cause I didn't want to ruin his plans for Cielo Severino.

Umiling si Jimin. His face softened a bit when he turned to me. "No, east. The last time I handed you to someone, you went with… basta, sundin mo na lang ang gusto ko." His eyes pleaded with mine.

Of course. Damn it, of course! The brute knew too well how to freaking defeat the inner devil in me! He would just look at me like that and I would freaking come following his words! What the hell?!

Dahan-dahan akong tumango. This was helpless.

"Hey dork, thirty minutes. She's only free for thirty minutes."

Halos mapatalon sa gulat si Jackson Wesley nang balingan siya ni Jimin. He nodded curtly while not really looking at the brute. Matapos iyon ay isang halik sa noo ko ang iginawad sa akin ni Jimin bago sila umalis ni Cielo Severino.

For a while I wondered, was it okay for him to kiss me in front of his girlfriend? Fine, he really did use to kiss me on the forehead for our every parting but not when he had a girlfriend, well, I guessed, he had every first time with Cielo Severino. And I didn't want to say this but I thought, that made her special.

Sa library kami dumiretso ni Jackson Wesley.

For as long as I wanted to be casual with him, hindi ako sanay na bigla-bigla na lang siyang tatawagin sa pangalan niya gayong kakakilala ko pa lang sa kaniya. We got our topic from our subject syllabus. Maayos naman siyang katrabaho dahil tutok siya sa ginagawa. He also had a lot of ideas na malugod ko namang tinanggap.

Since isang buong chapter ang topic namin, I didn't think this would only last for a day. Baka abutin kami ng ilang meetings.

"I'm thinking of throwing an ice b-breaker games for every su-subtopics, mga ice breakers na konektado siyempre sa lesson n-natin. With that, we can guarantee the cop-cooperation of the class."

Tinanguan ko ang suggestion niya dahil magandang ideya nga iyon habang ina-ayos ko ang powerpoint presentation namin, hindi ko na pinuna ang madalas niyang pagkaka-utal kahit na masakit talaga sa tainga.

Nabuhol ba ang dila niya? Hindi naman ako nangangain ng tao para mautal siya ng ganyan.

Abala siya sa pagkalap ng ilan pang data at information. We had borrowed related books plus we had our laptops to research online.

"So, I think, we could get five subtopics done tomorrow or less, if the presentation would be effectively interactive," sabi ko matapos kong tantiyahin ang mga topics na ma-idi-discuss bukas.

"If s-so, we'll last till ne-next week to finish the whole ch-chapter," aniya, hindi tumitingin sa akin.

"Definitely," tango ko, nagpipigil na ikutan siya ng mga mata.

Thursdays ngayon, at may lampas benteng subtopics ang topic namin at kung matutuloy man ang quiz namin bukas, then baka tatlong subtopics na lang ang matapos namin dahil may mga ice breaker games pa kaming gagawin.

Nang matapos kami ay nakita kong hindi naman kami umabot ng thirty minutes. Mahaba pa nga ang nalalabing oras mula sa oras na inilaan ni Jimin para sa amin kaya naisipan kong itanong sa kaniya kung gusto niyang kumain muna.

"Huh? Y-You want to e-eat with me?" he asked, stuttering while looking at me with wide eyes. Para bang gulat na gulat siya dahil niyaya ko siya sa school's cafeteria para magmeryenda.

At iniisip ba niyang kaya ko siya niyayaya ay dahil gusto kong makasama siyang kumain? Assuming din ang isang ito.

I actually didn't do boyfriends but I do flings. Madalas hindi taga-school dahil masyado ko nang alam ang ligaw ng bituka ng mga lalaki rito, but now that I thought about it, medyo matagal na rin pala noong huling nakipag-date ako.

The last time was two months ago and it didn't really go well. Mabuti nga at hindi ko naman madalas nakikita ang lalaking iyon. Only a day for every month, on the second thought, I didn't see him last month. At maganda iyon, I didn't think I would like to see his disgusting face… though he somehow resembled Jimin's face 'cause they were cousins.

"I want to eat and since you're with me, it'll be really rude not to invite you. Don't assume," sabi ko saka ko inirapan si Jackson Wesley.

He bit his lower lip and I saw how embarrassment flashed his eyes. Kahit na nakasuot siya ng salamin ay hindi noon na-itago ang mga emosyon sa mga mata niya at hula ko, nag-iinit na ang mga pisngi niya dahil sa pamumula sa mga tainga niya.

"I… I t-thought—"

"What? You don't want to? It's fine. I can eat alone—"

"No! N-No… I mean, it's not al-always I get to eat with H-Hannan Urduja," he hastily said, stopping me from walking to the direction of the cafeteria.

Namamanghang napatitig ako sa kaniya. Hirap na hirap siya sa pag-iwas ng titig sa akin. I had encountered guys so aloof of me like him but most of the guys were arrogant and rude. And there was something with how he said my name. Para bang napakalaking bagay sa kaniya na makasabay akong kumain.

Seriously, he was getting my attention a bit. Namamangha kasi talaga ako sa mga kilos niya.

Pinaningkitan ko siya ng mga mata habang pinipilit na hulihin ang titig niya. It was not always I got to be with someone like him, madalas kasi talaga si Jimin ang kasama ko at ang BTS.

Nameywang ako sa harap niya. He gulped at what I did.

"Do you have a crush on me?" malakas ang loob na tanong ko sa kaniya. Mas nanlaki ang mga mata niya at napa-atras pa siya. Kitang-kita ko ang biglaang pamumula ng magkabilang pisngi niya, pinapantayan ang pula ng mga tainga niya na nagpatunay ng akusasyon ko sa kaniya.

I didn't need to hear his answer anymore, he could deny it or admit it, but that wouldn't change the fact that his body language was failing him.

Mahigpit niyang hinawakan ang sling ng bag niya.

"Don't worry, you're not the first," natatawang sabi ko sa kaniya para pagaanin kahit papaano ang nararamdaman niya. Sa dami na ng confessions na natanggap ko, mostly from confident to over confident guys in this school, ay hindi na bago sa akin ang ganito.

This wasn't some kind of a handful matter, really.

"But-But a-aren't you mad? J-Jimin Park will surely beat me u-up if this reaches him," kinakabahang sabi niya na mukhang mas ina-alala niya nga ang gagawin ni Jimin oras na malaman nito ang tungkol dito kaysa sa iisipin ko.

"He'll kill you." I kiddingly told him that made him look pale. Hindi ko napigilan ang bumunghalit sa tawa.

He now looked like someone having his death sentence in a minute now. Naisip ko tuloy na masyado yatang sumobra ang tingin nila kay Jimin.

Yes, he was overprotective but he didn't have a say to whoever I would date, though I was out to whatever he would do to guys liking me. Pero wala pa naman siyang binubugbog sa mga lalaking nagkakagusto sa akin. He was not that shallow. Though madalas, pinapagalitan niya ako sa tuwing nakikipag-date ako saying…

"He'll just get his way under your skirt, east! You don't know guys! Why don't you just stay in your room with me than date whoever that douchebag is?"

Ang playboy, siyempre ay galit sa kapwa playboy kaya naiintindihan ko siya.

Tinakpan ko ang bibig ko para mahinto ako sa pagtawa at tinitigan na ang ngayon ay nagtatakang hitsura ni Jackson Wesley ngunit kababakasan pa rin ng takot.

"I'm just kidding. He won't beat you up, he won't hurt you just because of that. Well, not unless you hurt me, isusumbong kita kay Jimin at panigurado, sa morgue na nga ang punta mo."

"N-No. No! why would I hurt you?"

"Then don't step on my pride. Wala pang tumatanggi sa akin, sasamahan mo akong kumain o isusum—" Hindi ko na natapos ang sinasabi ko dahil mabilis na niya akong nilampasan at nagtungo na sa direksyon ng cafeteria.

Oh, I couldn't believe I could use Jimin's name for that!