Randomly dedicated to EbonyChew

Two days later

Grace's P.O.V

The mid-day sun came streaming through the windows in the master bedroom. Dust specks floated in and out of the light all lazy-like and free from care. I envied that. I wanted to be carefree too or at least just free. 
A canary, perched high on a tree branch, tweeted merrily at it's neighbors, a sweet sound that I barely enjoyed.
I stared at it as I thought deeply.
Was I really about to do this? Could I really do it?

Flashback

"Everything I do is for you, everything. Is loving you not enough?"

"You keep saying you love me, but look at our relationship Jer. It's falling apart!,"

Jeremy sighed noisily, like this conversation was already boring him. 

"Don't believe whatever lies Nora told you," he said changing the subject, " We can work things out, okay?"

"Whose to say they're lies? How long have you been saying that we'll work things out? I think we need some time apart Jeremy. I mean it -"

"No you don't. Don't be selfish Grace. All marriages have issues. You can't run from them. They will be here when you get back,"

He took a step to me, arms outstretched ready to embrace me. I didn't move towards him, but that didn't stop him from enclosing me in his arms.
I wanted to feel safe in his embrace. I wanted to melt away the tension, but couldn't.

"Think about Levi Grace. Do you really want to make life hard for him? Don't you want him to be happy?"

"Of course. Levi is my priority,"

"He's mine as well and so are you. I love you both so much. You believe that right?"

"I don't know," I responded softly.

"We'll make things better, you and I. Just believe that," he reassured me with a gentle squeeze. 

Presently

I shook myself from my daze.
The canary studied me with it's beady, black eyes as if it was amazed that I'd ignored it's song.

Nora's advice from a couple of days ago continuously ran through my head. I'm afraid to admit to myself the decision I've already made.

I've spent time really analyzing my marriage. It hasn't been easy since all I've done is cover the mess. I've doctored my situation so well that I've grown content with it. Jeremy hits me, I cry then go running back to him or he comes crawling back with empty apologies. It was a routine that I didn't even know I'd accepted.
Nora made points to me that I'd never dared to raise myself. What if this abuse trickles down to Levi? What if Jeremy never stops?

I can't be his punching bag forever and I can't keep making excuses for him. I can't help Jeremy if he doesn't want to help himself. I know what he experienced as a child, but that doesn't make things okay. Sorry is a sorry word that I've heard many times before. I need more than that now. Levi needs more than that.

Slowly, I got off the bed and made my way to the bathroom mirror. Red, tired eyes stared back at me as I regarded my face. With a deep breath I spoke out loud,

"I don't have things all figured out yet, but one thing is for sure; You are leaving him Grace. You are worth saving. You are not those awful things he says. You are way more and I'm sorry I didn't see it before,"
I choked up on the last few lines. I swiped quickly at my tears.
I'll cry later. I had lots of packing to do.