No one would understand it completely.

Why Scott wanted Ryder under his control. Or even why he wanted the bond between Ryder and I broken.

Growing up, Scott was the only one to pay attention to me after Ryder left. He called, texted, and even visited a few times.

He always made sure I wasn't alone or that if I needed a shoulder to lean on that he was there for me.

It was love. I never saw it until now. A sick twisted slithering feeling of guilt rang through my heart. Scott had loved me, always treated me better, and I threw him to the side like trash. On the other hand I didn't feel a thing for him other then him as a brother. Well before he pulled all this shit. Now Scott was lashing out in the worst way possible.

It had been 4 weeks since I talked to Mrs. Galento. The three buffoons who came with her I saw quite frequently. I don't want to say they quite followed me but there were aware of my every move because they were "protecting" me. Still felt like deja vu though.

Spring semester was in full force and I had a full course load. Another history class, Introduction to Get a fucking real job, a chemistry class, a nutrition class, and my nap class. I don't even know the name of that one.

Fuck I really need to concentrate.

Almost done with freshman year and then I could leave. A few interviews for other colleges were beginning next week. I had a total of 8 interviews to get through, 5 classes to stay on top of, a part time job, a best friend, and my vampirism.

Whoever said college would be a breeze, needs to be drained of their blood, then fed to the fish at the bottom of the Puget Sound.

As I walk past the literature building I can feel a few sets of eyes on me. My three creepers and a fourth that still watches me no matter what. I can feel the tether between us dwindling but it's still there, it's just very fragile.

I stop walking and turn to face him. His hair slightly blows in the wind as his red shirt stands out in the crowd. His black skinny jeans melded to his body perfectly.

Fuck now its showing off his tight ass and his huge c-.

Fuck Charlie get a damn grip you horn dog.

I stood by the building I was about to walk in to for my next class and he's just standing there staring at me. No emotion passes his face or even a slight change in his eye movement. His eyes are just deadlocked on to mine.

I frown at him, wanting him to acknowledge me in some way other then this. I see his shoulders sag as he glanced away for a second.

Fuck it. I hear him mumble in my thoughts.

His long strides help make his way to me easier. Especially when people part to stay away from him.

He's so close to me I can feel the heat radiating off of his body.

My love. His thoughts invade mine. I can feel everything from him. He knows something's wrong and he's...afraid.

I raise an eyebrow at him.

Why are you afraid? I probe.

He visibly sighs. My brother. He wants you. His gaze slightly shifts down as he sees his necklace placed on my collarbone. A slight smile emerges from his lips.

I frown. Ryder, I know you want all of this to work out but you are under Scotts control. I can't trust anyone right now. I'm even afraid to trust Nikki and Jack. Those two have been the ones to pull me out of everything. Until you can break his control over you I can't do this. I explain.

His face turns into complete and total sadness. I love you. Does that mean anything any more?  He asks, his eyes full of longing.

I shrugged and my lips pulled to a tight frown. I don't know. I don't know anything anymore. Look, I gotta get to class and I have a huge test coming up. I finish as I slightly turn.

Before I lose control of myself I turn to walk in the direction of my class. I can't lose control and kiss him. No matter how messed up, confusing, or in love I am with that man, this mess is just too much. Like right now, I have enough to worry about and I'm starting to get hungry. My emotions are at an all time high and blood bags just aren't doing it for me.

I need a release. The ever present tingling comes back to my fingers as I try to walk to my class faster. My body humming with an itch I can't scratch without a certain beloved by my side. After that club experience I can't even bring myself to look at another man.

I'm so blindly in love with Ryder it's almost sickening and I can't take it anymore. I would rather die then my life end up in the mess it's become.

I abruptly stopped in front of my classroom door noticing the other professor still wasn't done. I rolled my eyes as I stood off to the side.

Meet me at the park at our spot in the woods at 10pm. Come alone. I heard the whisper come out from behind me. I whirled around to see who was behind me but only came gave to face with another student who I accidentally smacked with my backpack.

"Fuck." He muttered.

"Oh damnit, I'm so sorry." I cringed at the red mark on his arm

"It's ok just watch it next time." He muttered as he moved farther away from me.

Great now I'm beating up people in the hallway. I sighed heavily. That voice, it was the same one from my bedroom on the beach. It had to be Ryder because who else could it be?