Anusha's POV

The next morning when I wake up Papa was on call talking to Jasprit Uncle ji, Siddharth's father.

He was on call for the past 30 minutes.

They were talking about me, as the upcoming Lohri was going to be my first Lohri with them, they wanted me to join in. Aunty ji wanted me to attend the pooja with her son.

The woman never forget to ask about me.

They wanted us to have blessings of elders and god. They wanted us to live a life full of love and wealth.

Lohri being the festival we celebrate on a big scale whenever there's a reason to celebrate and the words they have mentioned were I am the reason for their happiness.

Well if you hadn't noticed, then let me mention it you- I had started calling them Uncle ji and Aunty ji. Progress right?

I don't know why but I was happy.

I was excited.
I think I was excited for - for seeing him after long.

I wanted to be sure about his feelings for me, I wanted to be sure his intentions for me hasn't changed yet.

What I earned in a disguise of the proposal was something I never wanted to loose. I was desparate to keep it with me. Forever.
Till I could.

Venue decided for the function was Khanna's lawn, where the engagement party was held. Only the name of Khanna mansion was enough for drifting my mind back to the engagement night.

I could never forget that day, the memory was trapped inside me since forever now. That was the most embarrassing day of my life. Yet I was riant.

I was sure inside I accepted - replied with a yes because I wanted to see the smile on my parents face but something in me was sure, my happiness was hidden beneath.

I stood blushing in front of everyone standing spell bounded.

But you liked it, Don't you?

Ugh! Not again.

Following day

I was worried about what I was going to wear. I had been to numerous Lohri functions before, even have organised a few but never been the most expected guest, ever.

Never have experienced the eyes awaiting.

I was swimming inside my wardrobe. Never detested myself for having so many options for clothing. Still I had nothing to wear.

What to wear. Was the only pain in my heart.

One of the toughest question you ever ask to a girl!

Trying every dress one by one, showing it to my mother and sister for their approval was a tiring job. Mumma wanted me to wear a saree, where as Ayusha, wanted me to wear a suit.

What I wanted to wear was not negotiable. I was dying to crawl into my bed and call sleep in. I was too shy to walk out.

What.To.Do?

"This is the 7th dress I'm trying, I'm tired now."

"Acha acha, one more dress. What about this one? Right, Mumma?"
Ayusha said taking out a pastel purple coloured anarkali suit from my wardrobe, showing it to Mumma.

In reply, Mumma nodded and looked at me,
"I think this will look good on you plus its not too heavy and not too light as well"

"Whatever"
I rolled my eyes, take the dress from Ayusha, went inside the bathroom to try the outfit on- I swear this was going to be the last dress I was trying.

I came out of the bathroom.
Showed the dress to both of them.

The approval came like a relief. A wave of fresh morning breeze. They smiled widely and giving me a thumbs up.

FINALLY!

(Anusha's dress for Lohri)

It was already 5 in the evening, we were getting ready for the function, we were supposed to be there at 6 p.m. sharp. Like my father anticipated.

It had been only 20 minute since we walked inside our respective rooms to get dressed when Papa started his 'hurry up' chants.

Men have nothing to be worried about when it comes to dressing. They just get up, wear what they have prepared and bang all set.
No make up.
No better than rest attitude.
No bad hair day problems.
No accessory requirements.

Sometimes it feel curse to be a women. Especially when you are crushing over men clothing section.

I was getting ready, wearing the same dress Mumma and Ayusha have selected for me.

I'd decided to leave my hair loose, applied my eyeliner lining my lids and kohl marking my lower lid. My eyes look bigger then the small size I inherited.
A small bindi over my forehead, I wore heavy kundan- pearl earrings and bangles-sober dress and heavy jewelry a perfect combo!

The worst part for me, I had to carry a dupatta- which I'd never done before, only on rare occasions.

.

.

We arrived Khanna mansion, the guards open the gates recognising our cars.

We were welcomed by Aunty ji and Uncle ji.
I greeted them by touching their feet earning blessings and hugs in response.

I smiled when they called me beautiful. 
Girls love compliments.

The decorations were fabulous. Arrangements for Lohri were mesmerizing.

I was admiring the whole place, it all looked so different from the engagement preparations, the lawn was looking completely variant and bright.

The sitting arrangement few meters away from the fireplace was classy. They have arranged wooden plain couches with pillows kept on them.

For the dinning, there were small dining tables, decorated beautifully with pink tablecloth and flowers.

Everything was radiating festival vibes.
I loved the decoration and the effort they had done.

Few minutes in the function found me standing with my family when Sunidhi Di and Sumit jiju arrived.

"Hi, Anu. How are you?"
hugging me Sunidhi Di asked

"I'm fine Di and Jiju. How are you both?"
I replied smiling towards both of them

"Where's Aman?"

"We're also fine and he's with his grandma" Jiju replied.

"By the way, someone is looking really nice"

I blushed. Again!

Then they greeted my parents. After all the greetings and admiring, I was standing alone with Ayusha but my mind was busy looking for someone.

Where was he?

"You must be looking for Bholu. He is coming soon, actually, he was so busy the whole day for the decoration and everything."
Sunidhi di arrived from nowhere.

I was feeling really embarrassed.
Why everyone reads my face?

If that was all done by their Bholu, then the arrangement was elegant. The guy had done a awesome job.

Appreciable!

Sunidhi Di took us to where our families were seated.

We were talking to each other when someone brushed his arm past me and came in front where my parents were sitting.

We were standing in front of our parents across the fireplace.

I was looking at him, his back was facing me. I almost cursed for the manners.

Then he bends down to touch my parent's feet, my pulse quickened.

Within instant I knew who the man was.
He turned suddenly to look at me while touching their feet.
His eyes were glazing, he was looking intently towards me. The way his orbs search mine everytime, I feel like to hide my face away from everyone.

Then he went to Shekhar, shook his hand and hugged him. But still not breaking the eye contact with a smirk glued to his face.

He came to us and I literally died inside. My heart was beating against my chest like it will come out any moment.

'1'

He said 'Hi' to Ayusha, hugged Sunidhi di and then looked towards me.

'2'

He was looking handsome, wearing a two-piece blue coloured kurta. Was complimenting his physique, his broad shoulders, chest, biceps, the muscles of jis forearms had me there.

I am a physiotherapist it is normal for me to be obessessing over muscles. Don't dare judge me.

I was admiring his gestures, his personality, the aura the man was radiating.
He was exactly the best example for a man. The moment he looked towards me standing in front, my breathing stopped, I swallowed hard making sound in nervousness.

'3'

And I was dead!

"Hi," he said with a bright smile

"Hi" I replied with an awkward smile of my own

"How are you?"

"I'm fine," I again replied a bit shyly. I wasn't aware from where the cloddishness was coming from.

"Ayusha don't you think we should leave them alone"Sunidhi Di said.

"You know what? I was thinking the same thing." My own sister replied smirking

Instantly I had my head towards them, shaking my head, opening my mouth. But as soon  I would have said something they left.

Then there was him and me

Once again.

He gestured us to sit on the couch behind me and following me he too sat beside. Looking at me he said-

"You're looking beautiful"

"Thanks. So are you." I blurted blushing

Then I realized what I said. He chuckled and said
"you mean I'm beautiful? Naah, you are more beautiful"

I felt my cheeks burning,
"No, I mean you're looking handsome"

What?

Anusha! What are you saying?

"you think I'm handsome,"
he said.

Looking directly at me, he must have noticed me blushing. I was sure.

Why I'm always like this in front of him?

Why?

"you're blushing"

"'No, I'm not"
Run Anusha run!

"Yes, you are. And you look adorable when you blush"

I was quiet.

Completely dumbstruck, what to say? He left me speechless.

He held my chin and made me look towards him
"

I still love you"

Why aren't you running?

I knew I can't say more, I had to hide my face from him because he know that I was turning into a tomato.

Ok! Here we go.

The fact that he was aware of inner conflict had me running.

I got up from my seat and made my way towards my parents- Only they can save me from this situation. I heard him laughing at me. Which made me shy even.

I came where my parents were, I sat beside my mother, hiding my face from him. But soon he sat on the couch kept to my right, making side glances towards me.

Why he was doing this?

He turned shameless after confessing his feeling for me.

He was not hiding his feelings for me from anyone, anymore. Staring at me all the time and I bet everyone noticed.

He still love me!

No matter how hard I tried I was ecstatic inside. My inner self was elated. I hadn't lost what I had gained without anticipation.

I had never asked for something like that. It was just a mere part of my imagination, the thoughts I had shared with my sister and best friend only.

With him, the imagination was turning somewhat into my reality, scaring me inside.

My insides were dancing but my exterior was quite. It was like a whirlpool, bubbles rising from the surface announcing tsunami yet the occurrence would take time.

I wanted out but remained in. It was too early for me. I needed to assure what this was.
It was a feeling growing slow, passing with me, walking with me. He was sitting beside me.

The fact that I was holding myself was due to my lack of experience, whatever was happening was soon for me, I needed to learn.

(play the song Chadha de rang from Yamla pagla Deewana)

It was time for the pooja.
Aunty ji asked me to came in front of the fire with Siddharth. We were the new couple, the reason for the celebration.

I covered my head with the veil and stood holding the Pooja thaali (plate) with Siddharth standing beside me.

I looked once to my side through the veil, he was smiling. A beautiful proud smile marking his lips. His eyes looking silently the fire, face radiating the only emotion everybody feeling, happiness.

Worshiping the god, we held the thali together. Fingers touching each other. I looked in front praying the god for my parents happiness.

I prayed for my sister to learn patience.

I prayed for my brother to stand upto our father's expectations.

I prayed for my in-laws to live a long life.

Sensing his eyes on me I turned my head only to find him looking at me with a face which speak yet the lips were sealed.

Looking at him, I prayed for him to have whatever he ask for. I prayed for him to live a life he want. I asked health for him. I wanted to see this man looking at me all smiling, to remain the way I was seeing him today.
I asked god to give him pain, tears, longings but only short lived. I wanted him to be strong yet happy. I wanted happiness for him, he would cherish it I was certain.

W

e moved around the fire in circles with all our family members to show our gratitude.

We did our pooja, offered our prayers and I found myself enjoying doing these with him beside me.

WHY?
I

wasn't sure.

We danced a lot, typical Bhangra in the exact punjabi style.

After Pooja was done, everyone had dinner. It was the time for chit-chat.

Our parents were talking about our childhood- our old embarrassing memory especially.

"I think we should leave now its already past midnight,"
Papa said, looking into his wristwatch then at Jasprit Uncle ji.

______________

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