Baptism, August 6. Wren Lake, after church. Wear clothes that can get wet. Bring your own towels.

As his grandma parked the car, Tyler looked through the windshield. So many happy families, dressed up for Sunday, holding hands as they walked into church. He clicked off his seatbelt, sat back and breathed. "I don't think I even want to go in."

His grandma unzipped her purse. "Well," she said, "why not?"

"Because I don't live up to their standards."

She pulled out a mirror and glanced at her face. "You said you wanted to get baptized."

"Yeah, well...." He leaned on one arm, and he thought. "Maybe I was just bored when I said that."

She snapped closed her mirror and stuck it back in her purse. Opening her door, she said, "You'll find another girl. If Rachel's not the one for you, you'll find someone else."

But I don't want someone else, he thought. She is the one for me. Or at least it seemed like she was becoming that.... "I'm just supposed to give up?" he asked. "Just forget about her?"

"Well," his grandma said, "I don't know. What else can you do?"

"I don't know," he said, and rested against the window. "You can go on in. I need to think."

"Well, just come in. You can think inside."

"No, I can't."

She breathed with frustration, got out and closed her door. Tyler watched her cross the parking lot, sat back and tried to come up with an answer. Tried to solve this problem....

The night before, he'd seen Rachel at the youth meeting, but they hadn't really connected. All they'd done was make small talk, while Christian preached and Kayla listened and Bethany and Will practically did it in front of everyone. Tyler had wondered what he was even doing there, when he didn't agree with half the stuff they believed. Maybe he should just start over, try to find some other place to make friends....

He pulled down the visor, and looked in the mirror. He wished – really wished – that he'd never committed that crime. The memories of how bad he'd felt came back in a torrent. All the panic and terror, and embarrassment and shame. How it had changed his whole life overnight. How it had altered his perception of who he was. And how hard it had been, just in his own mind, to reclaim his identity. Maybe Rachel's parents were right, maybe he really wasn't good enough for her....

He opened his door and left the car. The parking lot was deserted and silent. He wove between vehicles, and ran up the front steps. No one was in the lobby, and when he entered the auditorium, the only empty chairs were in the very back row. He took a seat on the aisle, looked toward the stage, and listened to Rachel's father preach.

When the service was over, Paul Matthews informed the crowd that whoever wanted to get baptized should follow his car to Wren Lake. Tyler wandered to the back of the church, and waited for his grandma. He observed the humans, and wondered if any of them had ever committed a crime. If any of them had been arrested, and handcuffed, and fingerprinted. If anyone else was as bad as him....

Christian stepped around the corner, saw him and stood a few feet away. Tyler stood still for a moment, and then crossed the space between them. "I guess I'm going to get baptized," he said, and Christian nodded. "Well, good. It's really good that you're doing that."

Tyler thought. "Are we still allowed to be friends? Can we still hang out? Or is it just me and Rachel?"

He shook his head. "I don't know...."

"Well, do you want to?"

"Maybe. I don't know. I'd have to ask."

Okay, Tyler thought. Go ask Mommy. Ask Mommy if we can play together.

His grandma arrived, walking through the crowd, and took Tyler's arm. "Well," he said to Christian, "see you at the lake." They stepped into the lobby, and she asked, "So you're getting baptized?"

"Yeah," he said. "Might as well."

Back at the car, he got into the driver's seat. He pulled out of the parking lot, turned right, and followed a long procession up the road. The Matthews' minivan was a few cars ahead, and they drove onto a minor highway, passing trees on one side and a corn field on the other.

When they got to the lake, there was no pavement, and everyone parked in the grass. Tyler halted the car, turned off the motor and yanked out the key. He reached into the back for his towel.

"Let me get my camera up," his grandma said, tapping her screen. "This is a big day."

Tyler stepped out of the car, and saw that there was definitely a crowd. Not everyone from church was there, but there was definitely a crowd. A few cars away, the Matthews family was leaving its van, and Rachel stood with her brothers, while Christian held hands with the little two. Paul and Amy were talking to some guy, and Rachel glanced at Tyler. She took a few steps, and he took a few steps. She edged closer, and he edged closer. By the time they were standing next to each other, they were both laughing, and he quickly took her hand before he let it go.

"Are you getting baptized?" she asked.

"Mm-hmm." He looked out to the lake, and saw the sun's reflection, shimmering in the water. "Hey," he asked, "do you want to meet my grandma?"

"Okay."

Back at the car, she was still working at her phone, trying to get the camera up. Tyler went to her and said, "Hey, this is Rachel. And this is my grandmother, Mary Ann."

"Nice to meet you," Rachel said. They chatted for a while, and then the crowd began to surge toward the water. "Let me take that towel," his grandma said, and they crossed the grass to the lake.

Paul and that other guy took off their shoes and rolled up their pants, and stepped into the water. "In Jesus' name," Paul began, loud enough for everyone to hear, "in Jesus' name, today is the day... dedicating their lives to the Lord...."

The first person up was a girl in her early teens. She walked into the lake, and Tyler pulled out his hearing aid. "Would you mind holding this?" He handed it to Rachel, and she cupped it into her hand. "How well can you hear without it?"

"Not very well out of my right ear," he said. "But I have good hearing in my left."

The ceremony was on his right side, so he used his sight to memorize the ritual. The girl held her nose and closed her eyes, and the two men grasped her and supported her weight. They spoke in tongues, and quickly dunked her into the water. When she resurfaced, she opened her eyes and breathed, and was crying with joy. She took a few big steps back to the grass, and as her mom wrapped her in a towel, she was crying too.

"Guess I'll go next," Tyler said. He pulled off his shoes and socks, and hiked up his pants legs. Stepping into the water, he made his way to Paul. The lake was slimy, and he stepped over rocks and seaweed. He stood between the two men, and the water was up to his waist. They each grabbed one arm, and Paul said, "In Jesus' name.... In Jesus' name, hallelujah."

Tyler held his nose and closed his eyes, and then he was underwater. A second later, he splashed back to the surface, opened his eyes and inhaled. Water dripped into his face, and he slicked back his hair. "You're baptized," Paul said. "In the name of Jesus, your sins are forgiven. In the name of Jesus."

He walked back to land, and got the towel from his grandma. He patted it into his skin, and she tapped her phone. "I'm gonna send this to your mama." Rachel looked happy, and the morning sun shone. "How do you feel?" she asked, and Christian came to stand beside her. "Do you feel any different?"

Tyler fluffed the towel through his hair. "I mostly just feel wet."

She laughed, but her brother's expression didn't change. And it occurred to Tyler that he had known Christian for a couple of months, but he'd really never seen him laugh or smile or even look happy.