I know, some of the prompts are repeating. But I really can't control it. Hope you guys enjoy it. I will try to make sure that I don't put any repeated ones in.

Stolas: Relationships should be 50/50. Blitz cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter looking pretty.

Blitz: Remember, Stolas, don't do anything I wouldn't do.
Stolas: I think I crossed that line when I got a date.

Blitz: I owe you one.
Stolas: That's ok. You can just date me and we'll call it even.

Blitz: Two brooooos!
Stolas: Chillin' in a hot tub!
Blitz: Five feet apart 'cause we're not gay!
Stolas:
Blitz:
Stolas: *tearing up*
Blitz: Babe, c'mon...
Stolas: AND HERE YOU REALLY HAD ME THINKING WE HAD SOMETHING.
Blitz: Babe...

Stolas: I have feelings for you.
Blitz: Why? What's wrong with you? Are you sure you're okay?

Blitz, sweating: Stolas, there's something I need to ask you-
Stolas: Finally! You're proposing!
Blitz: How'd you know?
Stolas: Blitz, you've dropped the ring five times during dinner.
Stolas: I even picked it up once.

Stolas: If there's going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back.
Blitz: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself.

Stolas: Please, I'm begging you go to a doctor.
Blitz: I'm sorry is this OUR stab wound? Stay out of it.

Stolas: It's dark in here
Blitz: Don't worry dude I got this
Blitz: *Stomps their feet*
Blitz: *Skechers light up*

*Stolas and Blitz skipping stones on lake*
Stolas: It's such a beautiful evening.
Blitz, whispering: Take that you fucking lake!

Blitz: *Walking in to a room* Sorry I'm late... I was... doing things.
*Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder*
Stolas: *Out of breath* THEY PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKIN' STAIRS.

Stolas: I was arrested for being too cool.
Blitz: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.

Stolas: I'm proud to identify as morosexual. I'm attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.
Blitz: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther?
Stolas, already taking off their clothes: God, Blitz, you're so fucking stupid.

Blitz: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized.
Stolas: *steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to their knees and sob while apologizing profusely*
Blitz: That one. I want that one.

Stolas: I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness—
Blitz: Hi.
Stolas: *melts down in a flustered heap of softness*

Blitz: I think I just figured something out. I got to go.
Stolas: Aren't you forgetting something?
Blitz: Uuh...*hesitantly kisses Stolas's forehead before running out.*
Stolas: No, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?

Stolas: *Holding up a pack of pencils* These are kinda cute.
Blitz: Stolas, that's gay.
Stolas: We've been dating for 2 years—

Blitz: I love you.
Stolas, not paying attention: What was that?
Blitz: I said I'm selling you to the zOo-

Stolas: WHAT'S YOUR TYPE
Blitz: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially
Stolas, desperately, as Blitz bleeds out: YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Blitz: Oh! B positive.
Stolas: DONT TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Blitz:

Stolas: I think I'm falling for you.
Blitz: Then get up.

Stolas: Blitz...
Blitz: Oh no, 'Blitz' in b-flat.
Blitz: You're disappointed.

Stolas, jumping out of Blitz's closet: BOO!
Blitz:
Stolas:
Blitz:
Stolas: *makes a sad face*
Blitz: Ahh! Oh my god! You scared me!

Stolas: This is such a bad idea.
Blitz: Then why are you coming along?
Stolas: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

Stolas: Violence isn't the answer.
Blitz: You're right.
Stolas: *sighs in relief*
Blitz: Violence is the question.
Stolas: What?
Blitz, bolting away: And the answer is yes.
Stolas, running after them: NO-

Stolas: Stop doing that.
Blitz: Stop doing what?
Stolas: Saying things that make me wanna kiss the hell out of you.

Stolas: Blitz, you need to react when people cry!
Blitz: I did. I rolled my eyes.

Blitz: "I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy" I would. Pussy.
Blitz: "I'm not gonna sink to their level" I will. Coward.
Blitz: "I'm the bigger person" I'm 150cm tall give me the gun bitch.

Blitz: Well Stolas, I have to say, I'm really disappointed.
Stolas: Well, you didn't HAVE to say it. You could've just thought it.

Blitz: Change is inedible.
Stolas: Don't you mean inevitable?
Blitz, spitting out coins: No, I did not.

Stolas: Stop buying plastic skeletons for Halloween! It's terrible for the environment!
Blitz: Yeah! Locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly!

Stolas, texting: Answer your phone
Blitz, texting back: Wait a minute, I can't find my phone
Stolas: Understood
Stolas, 5 minutes later: You're a terrible person. You know you're killing me. You're killing me, Blitz.

Stolas: If I die, you can have what little I own.
Blitz: Wait. What do you mean "if" you die?
Stolas: My unending existence is fuelled by pure spite, that of which the painful experiences of life have rendered me full.
Blitz:
Blitz: *Sighs* Let me call your therapist again.

Murderer: Any last words?
Blitz: Do you think I'm cute? Be honest.

Stolas: Is something burning?
Blitz: My burning love for you of course!
Stolas: ...
Blitz: ...
Blitz: And the kitchen is on fire...

Stolas: Lol heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this lmfao
Blitz: What did you do op?
Stolas: A MISTAKE

Blitz: Mint is just cold spicy.
The Squad: ...
Stolas: What the actual fuck is wrong with you.

Stolas: Hey besties-
Blitz: Die.
Stolas: What did I do to you-

Stolas: Blitz and I are so close we even share a toothbrush.
Blitz: We what?

Blitz: Do you take constructive criticism?
Stolas: Not without crying.

Stolas: Hey, it's your turn to wash dishes.
Blitz: I'LL WASH THE WALLS RED WITH YOUR BLOOD.
Stolas: 'Kay, but before that, wash the dishes, also use soap this time?

Stolas: Why are you wearing glasses?
Blitz: Errr...reading...?
Stolas: Reading?
Stolas: I didn't know you could read.

Stolas, in a meeting: My policy is if you see something, say something.
Blitz: I saw a squirrel in a tree today!
Stolas, with the tone of someone who is used to Blitz: Outstanding.
Stolas: This is what I'm talking about people.

Stolas: *holding a bottle* Is this whiskey or perfume?
Blitz: *chugs entire bottle*
Blitz: It's perfume.

Stolas, handing out popsicles: Which flavor do you want?
Blitz: Blue flavor!
Stolas: Uh, you mean Blue Raspberry?
Blitz: Blue flavor! Blue flavor!
Stolas: Blue is not a flavor!
Blitz: BLUE FLAVOR!

Blitz, looking at their reflection: Now, that's rubbish. Who's that supposed to be?
Stolas: Well, that's you.
Blitz: Me?! Is that what I look like?
Stolas: You don't know?
Blitz: Busy day.

Blitz: I am not a lunatic. I have the psychiatric report to prove it. A slender majority of the panel decided in my favour.

Blitz, to Stolas: If you can ever manage to get over yourself, I would highly recommend being me.

Stolas: Strawberry milk doesn't taste like strawberry OR milk.
Blitz: Go the fuck to sleep Stolas.

Blitz: So, I've been thinking Stolas-
Stolas: That's dangerous.

Blitz: When I first met you, I did not like you.
Stolas: I'm aware of that.
Blitz: But then you and I had some time together.
Stolas: Uh-huh?
Blitz: It did not get better.

Blitz: Yeah, I find it quite emotional. In like a cool way.
Stolas: Did you just say it makes you cry in a cool way?

Stolas, holding a gun: If the conspiracies about life being a simulation are true WHOEVERS CONTROLLING MY SIM I JUST WANNA TALK.

Stolas, struggling to keep upright in their 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don't really think heels are for me
Blitz, pointing at them and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.

Stolas: *fast-forwards all the way through the movie*
Blitz: You can't just skip to the happy ending!
Stolas: I don't have time for their problems.

Stolas: I believe in you, Blitz!
Blitz, to themself: God, I must suck. The nicest thing Stolas can think to say to me is that they don't doubt my existence.

Stolas: What doesn't kill me better start running, because now I'm fucking pissed.

Stolas: Cool, any other secrets?
Blitz: I still sleep with the blanket I had as a baby.
Stolas: Awww-
Blitz, stern: I use it as a gag when taking people's pets hostage.
Stolas:
Stolas: There's no punch line 'cause it's not a joke isn't it?

Stolas, pointing: May I sit there?
Blitz: That's my lap
Stolas: That doesn't answer my question, Blitz.

Stolas: I literally cannot believe I let you talk me into this.
Blitz: I literally said "I have an idea," and you just went along with it without question.

Stolas: I'm Stolas. I'm an accountant.
Blitz: I'm Blitz. I have a knife.

Blitz: I prevented a murder today.
Stolas: Really? How'd you do that?
Blitz: self control.

Stolas: Blitz...
Blitz: I can tell by the tone of your voice that you are disappointed. Alas, I must further disappoint you by affirming how little I give a fuck.

Stolas: Hey, aren't you Blitz?
Blitz: You a cop?
Stolas: No.
Blitz: Then yes, I am.

Blitz: Am I in trouble?
Stolas: Take a guess.
Blitz: No?
Stolas: Take another guess.

Stolas: You kill people for money?!
Blitz: I can explain!
Stolas: And all this time I've been doing it for free like a chump!

Stolas, acting tough: You guys don't want to mess with me.
Blitz: Yeah, Stolas will straight up cry in public. Don't try them.
Stolas: Exactly, I will straight up-
Stolas:
Stolas, tearing up: Blitz, why would you say that?!

Blitz: What's the difference between a stalagmite and a stalactite?
Stolas: "Stalagmite" has an "m" in it.

Stolas: I'd make fun of your height but there isn't enough to make fun of.

Blitz: Pardon me, but it sounds like you're questioning my authority!
Stolas: Not at all, Blitz. Merely your primitive methods.

Stolas: Do you think sex without love is a sin?
Blitz: If it is, I'll see you in hell.

Blitz: I don't know, this plan seems complicated.
Stolas: You once said that about an orange.
Blitz: They don't make sense. Apples, you eat their clothes but oranges you don't.

Blitz: We're going to defeat you with the power of friendship.
Stolas: We're not friends.
Blitz, holding an axe: We're going to defeat you with the power of incredible violence.

Stolas: I hate when people ask me, 'What did you do today?' Buddy listen, I woke up at noon and then it was five p.m., okay? I don't KNOW!

Stolas: You use humor to deflect your trauma.
Blitz: Awww, thanks-
Stolas: That's not a good thing.
Blitz: All I'm hearing is that you think I'm funny.

Stolas: So are we flirting right now?
Blitz: I AM LITERALLY STABBING YOU
Stolas: That doesn't answer my question.