Give me more ideas if you have any because my dumbass is out of ideas, lol.

Alastor: Is it just me or is instant ramen even better uncooked?
Angel Dust: It's just you.

Alastor: Angel Dust, you've tried 37 times and you've failed every time. Give it a break.
Angel Dust: DO I HEAR "FIRST TRY PART 38?"

Angel Dust: Vegetable oil is made from vegetables, coconut oil is made from coconuts, so BABY OIL-
Alastor: CAN'T WE JUST HAVE A NICE FAMILY DINNER FOR ONCE?!

Angel Dust: I'm sorry, I really flew off the handle back there. It was like the handle was a bald guy going really fast, and I was his toupée.

Alastor, over radio: Testing. Testing. Angel Dust, can you hear me?
Angel Dust, standing next to Alastor: I'm standing right here.
Alastor: You're coming through good and loud.
Angel Dust: 'Cause I'm standing right here.

Abegl Dust: Get in loser, we're going shopping.
Alastor: This is a McDonald's drive thru.

Angel Dust, on the phone: I better go...kay, call me later... byeeee!
Alastor: Friend of Yours?
Angel Dust: Nope, wrong number.
Alastor: ???

Alastor: The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was changing their name to Angel Dust.

Angel Dust: You are, of course, wondering why it is I have brought you here tonight.
Alastor: Actually, Angel Dust, after all these years, I just sort of go with it.

Alastor: Do you have a self-care routine?
Angel Dust: "Keep going bitch" said to myself in different accents.

Alastor: We all have our demons.
Alastor, grabbing Angel Dust: This one's mine.

Angel Dust: Good news! I didn't screw up!
Alastor: ...
Angel Dust: I screwed up less badly than usual!
Alastor: ...
Angel Dust: Screwed up with less immediate consequences than usual.

Angel Dust: I love hearing Alastor shouting at someone else. It makes such a nice change.

Angel Dust: We got a free day now. What do you wanna do? Eat? Sleep? Nap? Snack?

Angel Dust: Hey Alastor, can I get some icecream?
Alastor: Only a spoonful!
Angel Dust: *Proceeds to pull out a comically large spoon.*

Alastor: What's that?
Angel Dust: Chocolate.
Alastor: What's chocolate?
Angel Dust: Candy. Do they not have candy where you're from?
Alastor: Yeah. Grapes, nuts.
Angel Dust: No wonder you're so bitter.

Angel Dust, staring lovingly at Alastor: I would die for you.
Alastor, doing their own thing: Then perish.

Angel Dust: *Turns on the kitchen light*
Alastor: *Sitting at the table, eating bread*
Angel Dust: It's four in the morning.
Alastor: Turn the light back off.

Angel Dust: Ooh, let me see! *Takes a piece of paper from Alastor*
Alastor: ...
Angel Dust:
Angel Dust: Oh wait, I can't read.

Angel Dust, after getting a library card: Now I know what true power feels like.

Alastor: *Locks Angel Dust in the car.* Act like a child, get treated like a child.
Angel Dust: What? Isn't it illegal to leave a child locked in a car?

Alastor: Prepare to feel really bad about yourself.
Angel Dust: I've been prepared for that my entire life.
Alastor:
Angel Dust: Or something mean about you.

Angel Dust: Watcha doin?
Alastor: Stealing my neighbour's cat.
Angel Dust: Scandalous.
Angel Dust: Can I help?

Alastor: Are you busy?
Angel Dust: Yes.
Alastor: Cool, listen to this.

Angel Dust: Do you know that we are made out of atoms?
Angel Dust: And atoms never touch each other.
Angel Dust: So in my defense, officer. I did not punch this kid.

Angel Dust: There's no "I" in team, but there is one in pizza.
Alastor: So, you're not going to share?
Angel Dust: I'm not going to share.

Angel Dust: Why is it that I always lose things as soon as I need them?
Alastor: Actually, it's not that you lose things when you need them. You lose them a while before. It's just that you LOOK for things when you need them.
Angel Dust: Okay yeah thanks Alastor, that's great but WHERE'S THE FUCKING FIRST AID KIT?

Alastor: Hey I got you food, pick a number between 1 and 10.
Angel Dust: Uh 4?
Alastor: Wrong, no food for you.
Angel Dust: Wait what?! WHY?! ALASTOR PLEASE—!

Angel Dust: I don't know how you have your foot in your mouth, your head up your ass, and your nose in my business. But here we are, you fucking wizard.

*Alastor is fighting a monster*
Angel Dust: Just stay calm! You already have everything you need to beat it!
Alastor: The power to believe in myself!?
Angel Dust: No, a knife! Stab it!

Angel Dust: What are amphetamines?
Alastor: Drugs that can go on land and water.
Angel Dust: Ohhhh.

Angel Dust: Alastor, when's your birthday?
Alastor: Why? So you can look up my natal chart? So you can figure out my weaknesses? So you can destroy me?
Angel Dust: ...So I know when to wish you a happy birthday.

Alastor, playing a video game: How do I play?
*Alastor has drawn first blood!*
*Alastor is on a killing spree!*
*Alastor is on a rampage!*
*Alastor is unstoppable!*
*Alastor is dominating!*
*Alastor is godlike!*
Alastor: Don't worry guys, I figured it out.

Angel Dust: This is Alastor, they're... not my assistant, some other word.
Alastor: I'm their carer.
Angel Dust: Yeah, my carer. They care so I don't have to.

Angel Dust: *running towards Alastor with open arms*
Alastor: *moves out of the way*
Angel Dust: Hey, why'd you move?!
Alastor: I thought you were going to attack me.
Angel Dust: I was going to hug you!
Alastor: Why would you hug me?
Angel Dust: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?

Angel Dust: The Ocean is a soup.
Alastor:
Alastor: Do elaborate.
Angel Dust: What are needed for something to be a soup?
Alastor: Erm... Water, salt, some form of vegetation, and personally I prefer some meat in mine.
Angel Dust: *Tilts head*
Alastor: The Ocean is a Soup.
Angel Dust: The Ocean is a Soup.

Angel Dust: What the fuck is wrong with you??
Alastor: What? No good morning?
Angel Dust: Good morning, what the fuck is wrong with you??

Alastor: Is there something you would like to say, Angel Dust?
Angel Dust: Oh, there are SEVERAL things I would like to say.

Angel Dust: This is a very powerful artifact. You'd be messing with some forces we don't fully understand.
Alastor: That sounds like a dare to me.
Angel Dust: Oh my god.

Angel Dust: Fine! I don't give a shit!
Alastor: You seem to give a lot of shit for someone who claims not to give a shit.

Alastor: Did you just call me a shrimp, you asshole?! I'm still growing, dammit!

Alastor: Are you good?
Angel Dust: In what sense?
Alastor: Generally.
Angel Dust: Oh, definitely not.

Angel Dust: Alastor, what did you just do!?
Alastor: I took your advice. I stopped running from the problem and I tackled it head on.
Angel Dust: I meant try emotional honesty, not murder!!

Alastor: I've invited you here because I crave the deadliest game...
Angel Dust, nodding: Knife Monopoly.
Alastor: I was actually going to play Russian roulette, but now I'm really interested in whatever knife Monopoly is.

Angel Dust: I taught the dog a new trick. *throws ball* Fetch!
Dog: *just stands there*
Alastor: He didn't do it.
Angel Dust: I taught him to ignore social conventions and think for himself.

Alastor: If there's one thing I learned from Angel Dust, it's to set people's expectations real low, so you end up surprising them by practically doing nothing at all.

Alastor: Ah, Hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this.
Angel Dust: Maybe we would, if you would sTOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE!!!

Angel Dust: Alastor, how could you possibly have gotten into this much trouble in one day?
Alastor: It... It didn't take me the whole day...

Angel Dust: You want to know why people are so afraid of clowns? Well you know what people say about how their feet aren't the only thing that's big? And how people who drive really big cars have small dicks? Well clowns are out there with their big feet and tiny cars...

Alastor: We always used to do the Wordle rather than take notes in class.
Alastor: To stop us the teacher would always threaten to tell us the answer if we didn't pay attention.

Angel Dust: Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
Angel Dust: I need my socks.
P.S. What do you need them for Angel? 👀

Angel Dust, texting Alastor: Alastor there's a moth on the outside of the bathroom door can you get rid of it?
Angel Dust: Pls hurry because I'm going to cry
Angel Dust: Alastor
Angel Dust: Alastor
Alastor: Alastor is dead. You're next. Love, Moth.
P.S. The fact that Val's a moth, lol.

Angel Dust: Working sucks.
Angel Dust: I want to be a malewife where my only responsibilities are being sexy and cute.

Angel Dust: I met this person on tinder and asked for their last name. They sent it to me and went "Doing a little background check? You might find out I'm a murderer, just ignore that" with a kissy wink emoji. Alright so I good sense of humour.
Angel Dust: I looked them up, they were a murderer.

Angel Dust: What have I done wrong?!
Alastor: Everything. For your entire life and death.

Angel Dust: The 'how the fucks' and 'why are you so dumbs' don't matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

Angel Dust: Do I least have a chance to explain myself?
Alastor: This is America, so nope!
Angel Dust: This isn't America, this is OHIO!

Angel Dust: I did it! I memorized everything in the book! I'm gonna ace this test!
Alastor: Ok, Angel Dust, I'll give you one more question before you go. What ended in 1918?
Angel Dust: 1917.
Alastor: ...You're ready.

Alastor: Cats be like: "sniff sniff sniff..."
Angel Dust: And its fucking awesome?!

Angel Dust: That was so hot, Alastor.
Alastor: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.
Angel Dust: I'm so in love with you.

Alastor: You've got to act tough, Angel Dust! Show 'em you can't be pushed around! Show 'em they can't mess with you!
Angel Dust: Right. Yes. Tough. Got it.
Angel Dust, standing up on their stool and slamming their hands down on the bar: I'LL TAKE A CHOCOLATE MILK.

Alastor, laying in bed: Get out of my room.
Angel Dust, standing just outside of the door frame: I'm not in your room.

Angel Dust: I'm so jetlagged I can't even regrender my chorf.
*Everyone stares at Angel Dust*
Angel Dust: I don't even know what I was trying to say.

Alastor: What are you drinking?
Angel Dust: Vodka.
Alastor: Straight?
Angel Dust: No, gay. Why?

Alastor: Time freezes for everyone but you one day. What do you do?
Angel Dust: Oh... I'd mildly trouble everyone.
Alastor: Alright, so what would you do?
Angel Dust: I'd shave a one-inch thick line in every thick beard I saw.
Angel Dust: I'd twist all the lightbulbs just a little bit so no one would know when they aren't working.
Angel Dust: I'd make every wing on girls eyeliner just a little bit higher than the other one.
Angel Dust: And I'd tie everyone's shoelaces together.
Angel Dust: And then lastly, I'd snip a little hole in every tea bag.
Alastor:
Alastor: Remind me to never allow you to have power.

Angel Dust: It is 6:09 .
Angel Dust: I am wondering why I'm still alive.
Angel Dust: Send Wendy's.
Alastor: The whole restaurant?!

Alastor: That's not funny.
Angel Dust: I thought it was funny.
Alastor: You don't count. You started laughing in the middle of a funeral because you started thinking of a meme you saw on Facebook.

Alastor: I'm genuinely surprised you haven't gotten arrested, let alone gotten a felony yet.
Angel Dust: Nat 20 Charisma.
Alastor: That is NOT how that works-

Angel Dust: My knee just cracked so loudly that I half expect it to glow in the dark tonight.

Alastor: I'm not funny, I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.

Angel Dust: Alastor, if you don't shut up I'm going to throw myself out of the car.
*click*
Angel Dust: DID YOU JUST TURN THE FUCKING CHILDRENS' LOCK ON?!

Alastor: You can't just "I'm a little guy" your way out of this one.
Angel Dust: Yes I can fuck you.
Alastor: Please... Use commas.
Angel Dust: Yes, I can fuck you.

Alastor: Might I make a suggestion you possibly won't like?
Angel Dust: Do you make any other kind?

Alastor: Might I make a suggestion you possibly won't like?
Angel Dust: Do you make any other kind?

Angel Dust: Didn't you die?!
Alastor: That was weeks ago, dude. Things change.

Alastor: I'm not being weird. Am I being weird?
Angel Dust: Yes, and that's coming from me.

Angel Dust: Surgery is basically just stabbing someone to life.
Alastor: Please never become a surgeon.

Alastor: Father, I have sinned.
Angel Dust: Daddy, I've been naughty.

Angel Dust: Did you win? Or just not die?
Angel Dust: Either way, hooray.
Alastor: ...Is "no" a valid answer?
Angel Dust: The hooray is redacted and you frighten me.

Angel Dust: Shouldn't get stressed out, it's not good for the baby.
Alastor: What baby?
Angel Dust, crying a bit: Me.

Alastor: I still have no idea how I'm attracted to you...
Angel Dust: Yeah, well, you're stuck with me, and no take backs, honey.

Angel Dust: My heart is guarded but like... very poorly. The kind of guards that would let 3 kids in a trench coat into an R rated movie.

Alastor: I fell—
Angel Dust: From heaven?
Alastor: No, I literally fell—
Angel Dust: In love with me the moment you saw me?
Alastor: MY ARM IS BROKEN!
Angel Dust: Okay, but do you think I'm pretty? Be honest.

Angel Dust: Let's watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
Alastor: Okay.
Angel Dust: And make out during the scary parts.
Alastor: Th-
Alastor: The scary parts.
Alastor: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Angel Dust: Can we stop shipping real people? Can we like, not do that anymore? Ever?
Alastor: Last time I checked, that was called human trafficking and it was illegal.
Angel Dust:
Alastor: I may or may not have just been informed that this is not what you were talking about in the slightest.