I honestly didn't know what else to do but cry.

Tears flowed down my face relentlessly as Ashton held me in his arms, tears and sniffles coming from him as well.

For the rest of my life I will never forget those words coming out of Ashton's mouth, the words that told me that our daughter might be taken away from us and that she might live with someone else.

"What are we going to do?" I sobbed into his neck.

"She'll take the test and then we'll see. And if it's positive then we'll get a lawyer and fight for her."

"What if she leaves? What if-" I wasn't able to finish my sentence because my cries cut it off.

"We won't let that happen okay. We won't."

I went to say something else and inhaled, causing me to hyperventilate.

"Breathe, Car." Ashton said I wasn't able to, I could only cry harder.

My head dropped to his chest where I continued to melt down.

"If you don't calm down you're going to have another seizure." He said but I didn't even care, how could I possibly care about myself at a time like this.

"Ashton." I cried into his shirt and he shushed me, trying to settle me down.

"She won't leave. She's ours okay. She will always be ours." He spoke to me but I could feel his anxiety and fear and it made me even more scared than I already was.

For some reason my tears just wouldn't stop, and from the seizure and my now crying I exhausted myself and collapsed into Ashton's arms.

He laid me down on the bed and wiped the water off my face before laying down next to me.

"How are we going to tell the kids?" I asked him.

"Let's not say anything until we get an answer on the test. There's no need to worry them right now."

"How will we explain this to Gracie?"

"I don't- I don't even know." He sighed. "I know this is something we never expected to happen and it definitely doesn't come at the best timing, but we will get through this okay. But right now you have to get better so you can be there for Gracie."

"Yeah." I nodded.

"I'll schedule the test for tomorrow and take her."

I nodded again.

We spent a little more time in solitude before we got a text that Harry had offered to take both kids back to the hotel while the guys came in to talk to us and we agreed.

Soon the door opened and they walked in, all solemn and upset as well.

Luke and Calum sat down and began researching lawyers and custody laws while Michael sat with us, trying to assure us that everything would be fine.

Ashton set up the DNA test for the next morning and the nurse came in to sedate me because I couldn't sleep.

I was a mess, and I felt like I would be for a long time.

--

Ashton's PoV:

In the morning Carter was still asleep when Harry who had spent the night with the kids in our hotel brought them up.

I thanked him for staying with them before dressing Gracie in the room in her navy blue and white dress (my favourite of hers) and then  took her hand as I began to go to the DNA testing centre where Holly Baker was meeting us.

I found the hallway and walked down it, finding the testing lab door where Holly was waiting outside.

"Hello." She smiled at us. "Hello Gracie."

"Do you remember Holly?" I asked Gracie and the little girl nodded before lifting her arms up to me. I picked her up and she wrapped her legs and arms around me before burrying her head in my neck.

"Still shy." Holly commented.

"At first but once she's spent thirty minutes with you she's your best friend." I said and Holly smiled.

"Daddy I want to go play outside." Gracie pointed out a window.

"I'll take you to the playground after we do this, okay?" I asked her and she nodded happily.

"Let's go inside." Holly said and led us into the hall and into a room where a nurse was waiting with a needle so she could take Gracie's blood.

"I get shot?" Gracie asked me as I set her down.

"Yeah, baby, but it's going to be really quick, I promise."

"No shot." She shook her head, her eyes welling up and my heart broke for her.

"I know you don't want a shot, I'm sorry." I held her as the nurse prepared everything and Holly watched.

"Here, I'm going to sing to her so tell me when you want to start." I told the guy who was taking Gracie's blood and he nodded before telling me to go.

The words to Gracie's lullaby left my lips as I began to sing to her the moment the needle pierced her skin.

She let out a cry and a whine but I continued to sing as I wiped away a big tear drop.

"Shh." I said between verses and she sniffled.

Finally the nurse finished and put a band aid on her arm, Gracie immediately going back into my arms.

"Look it's all done." I smiled at her.

"No more?"

"No more shots. You were a brave little princess weren't you? And do you know what brave princess's get?"

"What?" She clapped her hands together, a smile on her face.

"Ice cream!"

"Yay ice cream!" She gasped excitedly.

"You love ice cream don't you?" I grinned at her.

"Strawberry!"

"Mhmm. Strawberry is your favourite." I bumped my nose against hers.

"Daddy you silly." She giggled.

"Aw I know, but you're even sillier." I smiled at her. "Give me kiss."

She gave me a kiss and I couldn't help but smile at the child in my arms. My child.

"Let's go see if Mommy is awake." I then said and Holly Baker followed me back to the hospital room where Carter was up in the bed drinking coffee.

"Good morning baby girl!" Carter gasped when she saw Gracie and set down her coffee while I put Gracie on the bed, the little girl crawling over to Carter.

"Morning Mommy!" Gracie smiled at Car and threw her arms around her neck to hug her. Carter put her arms around Gracie and she laid down on Carters stomach, Carter kissing her forehead.

Then Carter looked up at Holly.

"When will we have the results?"

"In a few days. Once we get them then we will know what to do from there. I do apologise for all of this. I know it's difficult, but my job is to be for the child's best interest, and I want what's best for her." Holly said.

"So do I." Carter looked straight in her eyes and spoke, getting her message across that the best place for Gracie was with us.

Holly apologised again and left and during this time while I waited for Carter to be released I phoned several lawyers, discussing options with them.

I settled on one I would use in case this went the way we didn't want it to.

Finally the nurse came in and went to check Carters vitals before clearing her, but looked at her heart rate and noticed that it was quicker than normal.

Apparently this could be the sign of an oncoming seizure and they gave her some anxiety medication.

I stood beside the bed as I watched Carter lay there asleep and sighed.

"What are you thinking?" Luke asked me.

"That it might be better to keep her here in the hospital while this happens."

"You know she won't go through with that. She'll want to be with Gracie."

"I know, but I'm just worried that this might be the one thing that will do her in."

Of course having my fiancé in the hospital scared the hell out of me, but with this happening, I felt like she was going to get worse. I had honestly never been more terrified in my life than I was right now.

"Maybe I should call my mom and see if she can come to help."

"That would be good." Luke agreed so I got on the phone to call my mom and tell her the news as well, listening to her begin to cry while I explained it to her. She said she'd get here as soon as she could.

I was standing in the hallway making my calls and after I hung up the phone I noticed Carters nurse, Kelsey, coming down the hallway. She was a nice woman in her forties who had been very caring and watchful over Carter.

I caught her attention and she came over to me, clipboard in hand.

"Is everything alright?" She asked me.

"I wanted your opinion on if I should keep Carter in here while this whole custody thing with Gracie happens?"

She had heard us discussing it while she had tended to Carter.

"In some ways I feel like keeping her here would be better for her health, while in other ways I think it might also deteriorate it. A mothers bond with her child is something so special and close, and she'll want to and most likely have to be there for and with Gracie. If you keep her here she might get mentally more upset and stressed which is why she has seizures in the first place, she needs to be in the environment that provides less stress."

I thanked her for her opinion and then went back in the room where Harry was still there sitting next to Calum.

"Ashton." He said and I looked up at him. "I'm sorry about everything you're going through, I truly am."

"Thanks." I said before returning my attention to Carter.

After a few hours passed her nurse and doctor came in later to evaluate her and decided to let her go home.

Harry hugged Carter goodbye before he left and the guys took the kids back to the hotel while I let Carter shower and change before holding her hand tightly as we left the hospital.

We both kept our heads down as paparazzi shouted our names and asked us questions about Carters health, and I got her into the car as quickly as possible and the moment I shut the door behind me Carter burst into tears.

"Shh, come here." I pulled her into my arms as I tried to console her. Her body was shaking hard as she sobbed into my chest, trying to cover her face with her hands and hair as the paparazzi tried to take photos of us through the window.

"I don't want her to leave." She cried and I rested my head on hers.

"I know, I don't want her to leave either."

She cried in my arms all the way back to the hotel where I had the driver take us around the back so we would go in unseen.

In our room she changed into pyjamas and then bathed Gracie, putting on a smile for our little girl.

After that she put Gracie in her night clothes as well before bringing her over into our bed, the two cuddling up beneath the blankets.

As I got ready for bed myself I watched Carter talk to Gracie, the two of them laughing and smiling as they talked about candy, princesses, and the movies Gracie liked.

Soon I joined them underneath the covers after I had kissed Ender goodnight and then kissed both of them, telling them I loved them several times before putting my arms around them both.

The next day turned out to be the worst because Carter was so depressed.

Ender and Gracie could both tell but I could see Ender was scared to ask what was wrong with his sister.

I wanted to be with her in case anything happened but I had a job to do so I could provide for this family, and that unfortunately meant meetings all day to discuss social media, schedules, the new album, and merch.

"I just don't want to leave you here alone all day." I told Carter as I sat on the edge of the bed where she was still snuggled under the blankets. She wouldn't really be alone, she'd have the kids, but still.

"I'll be fine." She said, and you could hear it in her voice that her words were untrue.

"What if you called Becca or Harry to come keep you company?"

"Maybe." She sighed.

"If I get out early do you want to go for lunch?"

"Sure."

I could tell I wasn't going to get much out of her and kissed her goodbye instead of pressing harder to get the information I wanted from her, I couldn't do that anymore.

I got to the building we were having our meetings in and I sent her a text to give her a bit of hope.

' "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times. If one only remembers to turn on the light." -Albus Dumbledore'

I knew how much she loved Harry Potter so I thought this might make her smile.

'Stop being cute.' She texted me back after a few minutes. 'I love you, thank you.'

I checked on her during a break in the meeting and she told me she was doing fine. She said she didn't feel like socialising today though and wouldn't invite anyone over.

The meetings dragged on and finally once they were over and the guys and I got in the car to go to the hotel I called Carter.

After ringing for a minute it went to voicemail and I called again, this time she picked up.

"Yeah?" She breathed into the phone and by the sound of her voice I knew I had woken her up.

"Are you ready to go out for lunch?"

"I'm still in bed."

"Carter."

"Sorry. Go without me."

"I'll be there in twenty minutes. Get dressed. I'm taking you somewhere." I said and heard her sigh.

"Okay."

I hung up the phone and shook my head.

"She okay?" Calum asked.

"No." I sighed, knowing Carter was in so much emotional turmoil right now it was changing her.

When we got to the hotel I found Carter waiting for me in sweats, one of my tee shirts and her glasses, her hair around her face.

"Come on." I nodded towards the door and she said goodbye to the kids before following me.

"Ash I just really don't feel like going anywhere." She said as we walked down the hall to the elevator.

"I think you'll like where I'm taking you." I said.

We didn't say much else as we got to the car and I gave the driver the address. Carter stared down at her hands the entire drive until we got there.

"Where are we?" She asked.

"Just come on." I led her out of the car.

We were in some hole in the wall art district in London and I opened a scratched black painted door, walking inside the building.

You could hear crashing and shatter noises and Carter looked at me in confusion.

"Hey! If it isn't Ashton! What's up mate I haven't seen you in ages?" A guy called at me from across the room and I looked up to see Lucas, the guy who ran the place.

"Hey, what's up." I shook his hand as he came up to us.

"I'm good. You haven't been here in a while."

"Yeah, well I was a little busy asking this one to marry me." I nodded to Carter and put my arm around her shoulders. "Lucas, this is my fiancé Carter and Carter, this is Lucas; he owns the place."

"Nice to meet you." She gave him a polite smile.

"Same! Well I'll put you guys in room three. How many do you want?"

"Two for now." I said and then led Carter down a hallway to a white door that had a gold three on it and let us in.

"What is this place?" She asked me.

"You'll see." I smiled at her.

Lucas came in a few minutes later with two stacks of twelve ceramic plates and set them on the counter in front of the window.

"I'm really confused." Carter said after he left.

"Watch." I picked up a plate and then threw it at the wall behind the open window, the plate smashing into pieces and falling to the floor.

I turned to see Carter looking at me strangely.

"I used to come here a lot, it helped me get out whatever anger or feelings I was having in a more positive way than beating up Luke or punching a wall. It helped me get out all of the pent up aggression or feelings inside me, and I thought you might want to try."

"You never told me about this." She stepped forward and took a plate in her hands.

"Well I didn't think about it. I haven't done this since we started dating."

She smiled at this.

"So I just throw this at the wall?" She checked.

"Yup. Go for it." I grinned.

She looked at the plate for a moment before turning to the side and throwing it all the wall like you would a frisby, the plate shattering.

A laugh left her lips once it fell to the floor.

"Do another one." I said and watched as she threw another plate at the wall, a smile now on her face.

The more plates she threw the less tense and utterly devastated she seemed to be.

I threw my stack of plates too, feeling a bit of my anger release at the whole situation of how my daughter might be taken away from me.

We went through stack after stack after stack of plates until Carter threw her last one and then let out a breath.

"I really needed that." She said and I pulled her into my arms. "Thank you for this, really."

"Of course. Let me know if you want to come back."

"How about tomorrow?" She mumbled and I laughed.

Walking to the counter I payed Lucas a fortune for all of the plates we went through and then got back in the car to go to the hotel again.

Carter seemed to be in a much better mood as we walked in the door to our room where we were greeted by the kids and my mom.

They both got a little teary eyed as they hugged and I hurried to get us back out so we could eat.

The restaurant we went to had an arcade for kids and that's where Ender and Gracie were after they had finished their meal.

"So have you made a plan?" My mom asked us and Carter took my hand on the table.

"I have a lawyer waiting if it says he is her birth father and once we know then we will go from there."

"So would Gracie decide where she went or a judge?"

"A judge. Since this isn't your typical divorced parents fighting for custody case it's going to be different. We will have to prepare statements and go to court against him to fight for her."

"Did the lawyer say how these types of cases work out?"

"It's whatever the judge feels is in the best interest of the child."

She nodded at this and I was about to say something else when Carters phone started to ring from her pocket.

Her eyes went wide and she pulled it out to reveal Holly Bakers contact name on the screen.

"I can't do this." Carter gave me the phone and I mustered up all of the strength and courage I had to answer the phone.

"Hello?"

"Ashton, this is Holly Baker. I just wanted to let you know we got the results back on the DNA test."

"And?"

"It was a match."

My eyes shut tight and I squeezed Carters hand, hearing her let out a sob.

"I know this isn't the news you were wanting, but I will be here to assist you with anything you need. I know you are planning to fight for her which I highly recommend, and so if it's alright with you and Halle we can get Gracie and your lawyer here tomorrow for Gracie's questions with one of our workers to get the court process started as quickly as possible."

"Yeah, thanks."

I hung up the phone and let my head rest on the one hand that wasn't holding Carters.

I had always heard people talk about the fight of their life, and I felt like this was going to be mine.

I had to fight for what was right, smart, and the best home for Gracie.

I had to fight for my child, and I had to win.

--

If you don't think it's already sad then just prepare.

Thanks so much for reading.

Much love xx -M