- Strong; One Direction - 
- Forget About Us; Perrie -

Aurora Holland

The room filled more and more with each second that passed, causing my anxiety to grow the more I stood in my spot.

Miles stood next to me, just as quiet as I was. Everyone around us chattered in their own conversations, excitement and nervousness filling the room as one of the most important days of our lives approached.

It was graduation day. Everyone had been anticipating the day, while others were a little sad that their last year of high school was over.

I, personally, couldn't be happier. I couldn't help but feel excited to finally get this part of my life over, moving on from many things.

I've been looking into colleges for the last few weeks, even touring one or two when I found the time. I got a part-time job to begin saving up for college and also looked into transferring to a different store so that I'm not completely jobless when I start going to school.

"Sucks we looked into colleges so late," Miles commented, almost as if he could read my thoughts.

I glanced over at him, seeing his arms crossed over his chest as we waited to be directed towards our seats.

"There's still plenty of options. We basically just missed the early admissions," I told him, twirling my ring around my finger.

"Still," He said. "It's always good to get ahead of things. We've only toured a few and looked into a few others. We need to make a decision soon if we're going to be able to attend together. The last thing I'd want is to have put it off so long to get accepted into the same one and one of us gets in and not the other."

"You're getting accepted no matter which college you choose," I replied. "Worst comes to worst, I can just go to one near you."

"That's not ideal, though," Miles mumbled.

"I know, I'm just saying if the worst were to happen, we'd figure it out. I'd rather be close than not near each other at all."

Miles didn't say anything, probably because he didn't want to sour the mood with negativity. I didn't bother to continue the conversation either, my mind running too much and my nerves bothering me to where I didn't particularly care to keep up with any conversations.

Thankfully, Riverway High allows us to choose who we walk with. We walk out in pairs as we go to our seats, then row by row they'll allow us to stand up and in line to hear our full government names called out while we grab our diplomas.

I chose Miles, as Katherine is only a junior and isn't graduating early. Miles was the best choice - as everyone else either wasn't graduating with us or had already chosen someone to walk with.

Even if everyone were available, I think I'd only choose between Katherine or Miles. I want it to be memorable, to walk with someone I wouldn't regret choosing in the future. These two are my best friends - I don't see why I'd regret choosing either of them.

I heard from Katherine that Elijah and Carter are walking together. This was no surprise since they're best friends and have been for years. I'd also heard from the grapevine that Alexa and Logan are walking together, which also makes sense since she's his girl best friend and Paige had decided to walk with another girl she'd been hanging out with lately named Cindy.

Looking around the room, I took notice of the other duos standing in the organized lines they put us in. Ashley and Maya were together, with Gwen and Kaya right behind them. Lila stood next to a girl I'd never met before, and beside them, Bailey and Cameron stood side-by-side. Griffin and Quinn stood next to each other, Guin nowhere to be seen since she was just a junior. 

Before I could glance around at anyone else in the room, we were let out and led to the main area where the graduation was taking place.

I could immediately hear cheers and shouts as people entered the giant auditorium, probably because the family and friends sitting in the stands were excited to see us graduates.

This only made me more nervous, the ring around my finger moving quickly as I twirled it around. 

It felt like forever before we were finally entering the auditorium area, bright lights almost blinding me as I sheepishly followed behind Miles.

We were now single file to get to our seats quicker, Miles taking his seat in the plastic chair before I took mine next to him.

It was like this until everyone was seated, and as soon as everyone was in the building grew quiet. I scanned the area, seeing our group of friends who weren't graduating - Guin, Layla, Eliana, Z, and Naia - sitting higher up in the stands.

I then searched for my family before they saw me looking, and slowly but surely I found them sitting on the other side. Katherine was next to them, her eyes already in the center of the room where we sat.

Following her eyes, I saw her looking at where Elijah was sitting. He was looking at her as well and shrugged before looking at the empty chair next to him.

"I still don't have my speech prepared," Miles mumbled from next to me, catching my attention. I glanced over at him, seeing he looked much more nervous than I did. "I keep scrapping and rewriting, but to this moment I have nothing planned."

"Seriously?" I asked, my eyes widening slightly.

"I mean, it's nothing, right?" He asked nervously. I didn't respond as I didn't know what to say, and he cleared his throat as he pulled his collar from his neck. "Right?" He asked again. "Man, it's hot in here."

"It's going to be fine. You're going to do great, okay?" I asked, realizing how much support he needed in this moment. "You're going to go up there, piggyback off of the speaker before you - if you can - then you're going to say something inspirational to get the crowd buzzing. Whoever speaks after you is going to have a hell of a time beating it."

"Thanks, Ror," Miles mumbled, although I could tell my little pep talk hadn't helped much. He continued to rub his hands on his pants, his eyes darting around the room at how many people were there.

It wasn't long before teachers were up, saying speech after speech before they began everyone's walks. Each line would stand up, and head to the stage in a single file line, and the Vice Principal would then announce the names in the list order given to them.

They had a clipboard with every name - first, middle, and last. They would read it off as when we decided who we'd walked with, they decided to make it as organized as possible so we had to tell them to make it easier for them.

It was a quick process, which kind of made sense when you thought about it. With the number of students there were, it would take hours just to do this simple task - let alone do more than just say their full name and shake hands.

I watched as a line with some of our friends in it walked up, one by one. Student's names were called, they'd walk across, shake hands as they took their diploma - and depending on who it was, they'd motion to the crowd whether it be a wave, a whistle, or even something that was more out there and unneeded. 

"Elijah Layton Lincoln," They announced, and I watched as Elijah happily leaped onto the stage. He wore his usual cheeky smirk, waving at everyone in the crowd before stopping in front of Principal Stevens.

Principal Stevens held his hand out to shake, and Elijah just quickly looked at it before pulling the older man in for a giant hug. He was caught off guard but chuckled as he gently patted Elijah on the back twice before letting go.

Elijah pulled away and turned toward the crowd, holding his diploma up with one hand. He listed his other hand up with a closed fist, pumping it much like John Bender at the end of The Breakfast Club.

Everyone shouted at this, and he just continued as the next person was called.

"Carter Hayden Jackson."

Although I knew it would be better to stare elsewhere, I couldn't help but take my attention away from Elijah and to the stage, where Carter should be.

He wasn't there.

Silence filled the room, and everyone began to look around for the boy. He didn't seem to be anywhere, and so they called his name once more.

"Carter-"

"I'm here!" The sudden sound of someone shouting echoed through the stadium.

I glanced at Miles, who was already looking at me. He seemed to be looking for some type of emotion, but I didn't let any show. I'd become good at that lately, and so when he saw he wasn't getting anything out of me, he looked away.

It wasn't long before I watched Carter fly past the students sitting down, weaving his way through the line of students waiting to go up. He jumped up the steps skipping every other one, stopping right in front of Principal Stevens.

He smiled - a smile that was rare to see from him, but one I'd seen plenty of times - as he shook his hand and took the diploma.

Things went back to normal after that. Line after line went up, one after another and before I knew it - I'd already gone up and gotten my diploma.

Honestly, I couldn't even remember how I felt. It felt like a blur - I focused on Miles until he was already across the stage, then I just acted as if there weren't hundreds of people watching me. I didn't look, despite the feeling of millions of eyes on me like I was an animal at the zoo.

Staring at the diploma in my hands, I didn't bother to listen to the speeches. My mind ran with what had happened - had I looked okay as I walked across the stage? What if the cap made my hair look weird? What if there was a stain on my gown?

Too many questions ran back and forth through my mind, they didn't stop until I realized the seat to my right was empty. Looking at the stage, I watched as Miles nervously stood at the stage behind the podium.

I hadn't even realized it was his turn to speak, but then again we'd been here for so long everything just felt like it was blending. I know I should be more excited, taking in every moment of this day. But truly, it felt unimportant at this moment.

Maybe I'll regret it later, maybe I won't. But I got the diploma, I walked across the stage. I did what the most important part of the day was, and I'll forever have the photo. Those are the memories I needed, right?

I listened to each and every word Miles said. He said what you'd expect from a Straight A student to say, going on about how this is our opportunity to make the best of our lives.

I took what he said to heart, enough to where I couldn't stop smiling. He smiled as he spoke, not caring about murmurs from people like Ashley Wilde or James Hanneman, simply because the number of people graduating was so small compared to those two students from Riverway High.

Both Miles and I know that realistically speaking, high school was their peak. They focused on popularity more than anything else, so they didn't fully amount to everything they could, hindering some of their opportunities in college and university.

Obviously, this didn't mean they couldn't get in. Money can get you anywhere really. it was more so the fact that their grades and GPA were highly affected by their focus on their reputations.

"I think with the right people, and the right motivation, anything is possible. Thank you." Miles concluded.

People applauded at this, including me. I sat my diploma on my lap and clapped as loudly as I could, watching as he exited the stage to make his way back to where we were sat.

He smiled as he sat down next to me again, and I grabbed his hand in excitement. "You did wonderful!" I quietly exclaimed.

"You think so? For a second I thought I screwed it all up," Miles said.

"I think you were perfect," I mumbled, letting go of his hand.

He smiled, but just before he could respond the sound of the mic feedback caught our attention. I looked at the stage, where Carter stood behind the podium.

Due to the popularity Carter got whether he wanted it or not, everyone immediately stopped speaking for him. He didn't technically need to wait the way Miles had, but he didn't say anything either way. It was as if he were waiting for everyone's attention, even though he already had it.

He looked around, almost like he was attempting to look at every single face that sat in the crowd. He even glanced briefly at the people who'd come to see the graduation, and at the teachers and Principal who'd stood to the side to observe everyone's speeches.

"Hi," He finally spoke, his voice soft. He looked around at the teachers again - almost as if he were nervous - before looking straight again. "I think that everyone's speeches honestly covered everything, you know?" He cleared his throat. "I mean - high school being important, basically everything Miles just covered it's almost like I wasn't even needed up here."

I bit my lip as he spoke. I hadn't heard his voice this soft in a while, as he'd grown short and cold to everyone much like he'd been before I moved here - from what I'd heard. I hadn't known too much about what he was like except for what others would say, and you can't always base your judgment of someone on what everyone else says.

Then, his eyes found mine. I'm not sure how he had, as we were quite in the middle of the chaotic center of meshed colors, but he did. His eyes met mine, his mouth shutting as if everything he'd been about to say left his mind.

I knew I should look away. I should stop looking at him, look at anything but him. But I couldn't. My eyes stuck on his, and although he was quite a distance away - I somehow knew that he was looking at me and not some other person in front or behind me.

He glanced away, looking to the left. I could only assume it was in the direction of the faculty again - I couldn't be sure. My eyes were stuck. I could feel myself twirling the ring he'd gotten me over and over again, but my eyes never left him. Even as he looked back at me, I didn't look away despite how much I told myself to.

"I-" He began again, only to stop. "I don't know what to say. I was told to come up here, and say whatever I can about how great Riverway is, and- and how amazing it is to have the opportunity to be here and learn. Which while I think that those statements are true to an extent, that's not what I think I'm going to talk about." He stopped, pulling what looked to be a few folded-up sheets of paper from his pants pocket. 

I felt a hand over mine, and I didn't need to look to know that it was Miles. I could see him in the corner of my eye giving me worried glances, but I didn't look at him. My focus stayed on Carter, who only looked away from me a few seconds at a time before his eyes would find mine again.

"I thought long and hard about what to say. What could I possibly say that's different from what Logan and Miles and the other speakers said, all while staying in that general area?" He asked, glancing around for a moment. He then looked at the paper he unfolded, his eyes skimming over word after word, as if he were reading it in his head before he decided to say it out loud. "But truthfully, I can't."

Murmurs erupted around me, and I finally looked away to see Principal Stevens chatting with another teacher. They didn't bother to do anything to stop Carter, and so he continued when he realized they were allowing him to speak his mind freely.

"I've had a lot of things happen while attending Riverway. But if I were to be completely honest, nothing impacted me the way they did this year. Of course, every year of high school is important, or whatever the teachers say. I hated school. I didn't care. I didn't care about the popularity, or the teachers - no offense - or anything. I came, I skipped, I left. I did anything I could just to get through the day. Nothing excited me, nothing inspired me. No amount of clubs, after-school activities, classes, nothing could get me excited about my future."

I felt my lips part, my entire being completely caught up in everything Carter spoke.

"Not saying I was a bad student, but I wasn't good. I didn't enjoy the little things. I didn't enjoy the people around me, my best friends, and the friend group I was grateful to have. The things my parents did for me, the sibling I was blessed with. I took everything for granted because I truly didn't care. I didn't see what others went through, I didn't care about anyone's life that wasn't mine. I did what I wanted when I wanted, not caring about any type of consequence."

"I've messed up a lot. I've lied, hurt people." His eyes met mine again, "I messed up. There's a lot I learned this year, but one thing I've learned is how shitty high schoolers are. They will judge, and laugh, and ridicule every little thing you do whether you want it or not. People are willing to do anything they want - much like I did - not caring who got hurt or how bad. I didn't realize how bad it affected Riverway High until I met-" He stopped for a second, his hands shaking as he held onto the podium for support. "I met someone. Someone who- who showed me there was more to life than money and popularity. That even though school isn't something most students like, there are still good things to it. You find out what classes you enjoy, and what teachers you bond with to help you with your future. I've lived in Riverway the majority of my life, and nobody's changed my life in the way this person has, and they've lived here not even a full year. She showed me that everything happens for a reason whether it be good or not, and we shouldn't take anything in our lives for granted."

"Whether it be something such as school, graduation, teachers, family. All of it matters. How you treat people matters. You being rude or harsh to someone might never matter to you again. The things you say may leave your mind, yet the person you say it to will be affected for their entire lives. They will always remember you as the person who treated them poorly. Their bully. Who wants to be remembered as a bully?" He laughed a dry laugh, although I could see how anxious he was. This speech - whatever it was meant for - was a lot for him, yet he continued as if he were running for President and this was the most important election of the year.

"If any of you take anything out of this mess of a speech, it's to remember that although this moment in time may be small to you. You might not care about high school, you're just doing your best to get through it. But it matters to someone. I've personally ruined someone's senior year because I couldn't just be open and love. I couldn't just stop thinking about my reputation when I truly didn't even care. I continued to live without thinking of my actions, and it hurt the one person I care about more than anything. Don't do that. Don't go through life - whether you're in the audience or the grad party - treating people poorly just because you can. And Riverway? Do better."

I hadn't even noticed the tears spilling down my cheeks until Carter was off of the stage, everyone whistling and whooping as he went back to his spot.

"Rory," I heard Miles mutter next to me, squeezing my hand. I glanced over at him, my lip trembling as I struggled to keep myself composed.

I hadn't even noticed Principal Stevens up on stage, excusing everyone, and I didn't move when everyone stood and shouted as they threw their graduation caps in the air. I sat in my seat, frozen, unsure of what to do.

Miles didn't throw his cap either. He stayed in his spot with me, watching me with a look I couldn't describe as I sat there like a mannequin. 

Carter was talking about me. He looked at me when he wasn't looking at his papers, and that left me with even more confusing feelings than before.

"We can't stay any longer, Ror," Miles mumbled from next to me.

I stood up with shaky legs, Miles holding onto both of our diplomas in one hand as he held my waist with the other. He led me behind the group of graduates leaving the stadium, where we'd walk out to the front to meet our family members.

How was I supposed to face my family? Or our friend group for that matter? There's no way they didn't know Carter's speech was about me, at least the ones who know the entirety or most of the entire situation. Which is kind of everyone who'd attended PROM or knew what went on between us.

We stopped when we'd arrived outside, and Miles stood in front of me with a concerned look on his face. "It's alright, okay?" He mumbled.

I went to respond the first thing I could manage to mutter, but before I could I felt arms wrap around me from behind.

Panicking, I began to wiggle, but as soon as I realized it was just Cameron, I calmed. He twisted me around, his smile faded as he saw my face.

"Oh, Rory darling." He whined, wiping my cheeks. "I know it's such an emotional day, so those better be happy tears I'm seeing!"

I know he was just doing his best to make me feel better - considering he knew more of my thoughts than most - and so I smiled a sad smile at him.

"I can't help it," I mumbled.

He just shook his head, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as he turned us back to Miles. "Speech was great man, one of the best."

"Definitely not the one everyone's buzzing about," Miles spoke without thinking. His eyes then snapped to mine, his cheeks turning a dark red. "Too soon. Sorry."

"We're actually supposed to be meeting the family and friends over there, so why don't we head?" Cameron asked. He began to walk with me under his shoulders without waiting for an answer, causing Miles to follow on the other side of me.

We weaved around the students littering in front of the stadium talking to their family and friends. I ignored the looks that were sent my way, my tears long gone thanks to Cameron and Miles' jokes.

I felt numb as I faked a smile, hugging my family and friends as they gathered around us graduates. It felt like the photos were never-ending, and the smile I smiled began to hurt after a while. 

Bailey rambled on to us about how we needed to have one last big hangout before summer, considering a lot of us were going to different states or even out of the states for the summer. Not to mention we're also going to be going to different schools for college, for her that's a perfect reason to party.

I barely listened as she rambled on, my mind running with the speech Carter spoke. Every word repeated in my brain as if it were a script I was forced to remember.

My eyes moved behind Bailey, where Carter stood in the distance talking to Elijah. His eyes were already looking my way, the same sad eyes he looked at me with during his speech.

He hesitated before lifting his hand, waving slightly. I wanted to wave back, maybe even go up and tell him I appreciated his speech. But I didn't, because I can't. 

I've worked too hard to get over him, and although he stood up in front of over a thousand people basically admitting he was sorry, I couldn't give in.

"Ror," Cameron said, stepping in front of my view of Carter. I looked at him, seeing he was already looking at me. "We're thinking of getting together for some food."

I looked at him for a moment, getting ready to decline. I needed to figure out what to do with Carter, as it felt my heart was breaking all over again. But it seemed Cameron knew that I was about to throw out a random excuse, and so he cut me off before I could speak.

"Miles and Katherine will be there, your parents already said it was okay, and I'm paying and driving." He said. "Did I cover everything?"

I looked at him, truly thinking about whether or not to go. When I looked past him to where Carter and Elijah previously stood and saw they were nowhere to be seen, I looked back at Cameron.

Forcing a smile, I nodded. "If you're paying."

"Okay, let's go then."

++

One more chapter, then this story's over! After that I'll be going through and editing the story to refresh my brain on some things, then I'll be focusing on the sequel. Hope you're excited for the (most likely) conclusion for Rory's story!