my world is feeling like it just might explode

Aurora Holland

"Hello, Earth to Rora!" A hand swatting across my face caused me to blink quickly, my face turning red as Paige looked at me in confusion. She stood at the end of my bed with her hands on her hips, having stopped her previous rant as she noticed I wasn't actually paying attention.

She had been going on about something at school. Riverway High School to be exact, the school I'll be attending in three days.

"Have you even been listening?" She asked, frowning slightly at me.

"Of course I have," I lied, moving into a different position.

This bed was new and I've only slept on it for a few days now, but it was quite lovely. It was the comfiest bed I've ever had, let alone the biggest. It could fit like three of me altogether, which was perfect considering I have a big tendency to kick around in my sleep.

"Okay, then what have I been saying?" She smirked down on me. Her eyes were squinted to the point I could barely see the beautiful brown color. It was a thing she did so constantly, but she was very - and I mean VERY - expressive with her eyes.

Does that even make sense?

"Uh-" I glanced past her, trying to think of something quickly. As always, I failed, and so I looked at her with a sad look. "Something."

"I was preparing you for your first day at Riverway--" She stopped, waving her hands dramatically. "By telling you to stay the fuck away from people who don't know what they're doing in life."

"That's very assuring, thank you, Paige." I sarcastically remarked, earning an eye roll from her. "Paige, I'm just saying-" I sat up in my spot, running my hand through my messy hair. "I start in three days. I'm already stressed enough, if you sit and continue to rant about how Harry Met Sally I'm going to die of exhaustion before getting to set foot in the place."

Paige rolled her eyes yet again, probably at my movie reference. She just sighed, sitting at the foot of my bed. "Ro, I love you and all, but you haven't stepped foot in a public school before. It's not as easy as it sounds."

"Just because I've never attended public school until now doesn't mean I'm completely stupid in the topic. I'm not isolated, we've had plenty of friends who've told me stories about public school." I replied, "Not to mention, I have social media. I see videos, photos, and everything that's posted online."

"But there's a difference between seeing it and experiencing it." She dramatically explained, her arms still waving in the air despite her having taken a seat.

"I guarantee that no matter what, something's going to go wrong. So why stress about it when I have three more days of freedom?" I asked.

"You only got lucky with the three extra days because of the day Uncle Harry chose to move down here. You moved here on a Thursday night and your dad being the saint he is-"

"Yeah yeah," I cut her off with a wave of my hand. "Decided to wait till the first day of the week to let me start."

"How's your mom taking it?" Paige asked, seeming to forget about whatever Riverway High drama she'd been ranting about only moments before.

"Thinks it's stupid because the earlier I go, the earlier I get caught up. But my dad quickly counters it with 'Okay if Rora can go to school, then Jason can'." I answered.

"Of course, she's not going to let her little baby feel so pressured first thing," She let out a light giggle, seeming to miss the look I gave her. "It's so weird your parents have favorites. And it's even weirder that you're your dad's and Jason's your mom's."

"You only find it odd because you're an only child, you can't relate," I spoke with a sigh as I pulled myself from the bed. "Besides, I don't think I'm actually my dad's favorite. He just feels bad that my mother still and always has babied Jason."

"Are you kidding me, A?!" Paige exclaimed, looking at me in disbelief.

I just stared at her from where I'd been standing in the middle of the room, confused at her outburst. She rolled her eyes - for the umpteenth time - as she stood up.

"Your father gave you all this-" She motioned around the room.

She was right. He did go above and beyond to give me the perfect dream room. It was located at the very top of the house, where the attic is. It actually used to be an attic, but my father basically turned it into a mini living space when he renovated the house. But it didn't really feel like an attic, as the entire shape of the house was an odd shape. All I know and can really say about it is that it's the very top of the house, and I almost feel like I live on my own.

I had everything I needed up here: entertainment, a giant bed with fluffy blankets, a big closet space, and even my own bathroom. It's everything I ever dreamed of and more, coming from an old house that had three bedrooms and one bathroom.

Not to mention, the 'three' bedrooms were only supposed to be two. Someone who had lived there sometime before we did had separated what was eventually mine and Jason's room, making it into two very tiny bedrooms instead of a decent-sized one.

"But he also completed the unfinished basement and put in a tiny bathroom for Jason." I held a finger up, "Therefore he did something for the both of us, not just me."

"Jason didn't get an entirely new bed," Paige said, wrapping her slender fingers around one of the giant posts at the edge of the bed.

She had a point there, he did buy me a bigger mattress and the bedframe I'd been dreaming of having since I was a kid...

It sounds stupid, but the bedframe just reminded me of what a princess would have in a fairy tale, okay?

"But he's also not fully grown, I'm sure the moment he hits puberty my mother will be the first to arrive at the mattress store," I countered. "Look, you don't get it, okay? You're an only child and both of your parents love you."

"Your parents love you, Ror," Paige spoke with her usual sweet tone. She had the same smile she always wore, one that made her absolutely loved by anyone and everyone. "Your father just loves you a lot more than the rest. Which is okay. You're right, just don't listen to me I don't know what I'm talking about."

This time, I was the one to roll my eyes. She just giggled in response, tapping her perfectly manicured nails on the dark wood. She did her nails herself - just another one of her many talents. Anything that had anything to do with beauty, Paige was extremely good at it. Of course, she works for it so it pays off, but she's good at a lot of things that she doesn't even need to try for.

"Okay, well, anyways, the reason I came over-"

"Ah, yes, I finally get to know why The Paige Holland decided to bless me with her presence only two hours after she got here." I sarcastically cut her off, smirking at her when she gave me an annoyed look.

I motioned a hand at her to continue as I laid back down on my bed, her dark eyes never leaving me as I did it. She suddenly grew sheepish, a look I hardly ever saw my cousin wear.

We've known each other since diapers and this is one of the first times she's seemed nervous to talk to me.

I didn't say anything as I waited for her to talk to me about what she wanted to talk to me about but instead studied her features. It was as if we switched bodies for a moment. I was the extroverted flirty girl who everyone fell head over heels for, and she was the one almost too afraid to say hi. And if she did manage to say hi, it either came out stuttered and jumbled or in some stupid sarcastic remark that made people think she was weird.

It felt odd.

"There's a party-"

"No. Nope. Not happening," I immediately turned her down, laying back on my bed.

"But, seriously, Ror-"

"No, Paige." I cut her off once again. I sent her a look, "Even if I did want to go, you know I couldn't."

"Come on! It's tomorrow night, which is the weekend so you'll parents will allow you to go-"

"I'm sorry, have you met my parents?" I asked, cutting her off yet again. I'm not usually the type to cut anyone off, let alone Paige, but she knows how my parents are. How my mother is.

"That's why we lie. Look, hear me out, okay?" She quickly held her hands out in defense before I could cut her off again. "We're going to tell our parents that there's a school event tomorrow. I'll stay the night so I can help you if your mom decides to grill you, and nobody will know."

"That sounds like an extremely flawed plan, Paige." I shook my head as I leaned back against my fluffy blue pillows. "I don't see how it would work."

"I've got it all planned out, okay? I thought it all over before coming over. Look, we don't need them to chauffeur because I now have my own car. We'll tell them it's not a school event at the school, but it's a study group."

"You think my parents will believe it's a study group when I haven't even started classes?" I asked.

"Tutoring! I'll tell them I'm going to a tutoring session and wanted you to go with me because then you could not only meet some of the students at Riverway but you could also get an idea of what the studies are like. Your mother will be shoving us out the door before we can even get the full question out!" She exclaimed as if she just thought of the best plan to ever exist in the history of plans.

"And what do you think she'll say when she sees us all glammed out?" I asked.

"You leave that up to me," She spoke with a smirk, and part of me hated the fact that I was going along with it.

But then again, I've always been the one to follow in Paige's shadow.

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This is the fourth time I've rewritten this story. I'm already liking this one a lot better! I hope you guys enjoy it too! <3