Juice stood holding his baby girl as he watched Angela move around the kitchen while making breakfast. She hadn't noticed him yet, so he looked his fill, enjoying the sight of her wearing nothing but a pair of his boxers and a camisole. There was something off about her, he noticed. Music was playing softly in the background, but she wasn't dancing around and singing like she usually did. She was somber now, pensive. He had a feeling it had to do with what had happened the night before.

He knew how she felt. He hadn't been able to sleep at all. Had stayed up most of the night, tracing the tattoo on her back as he stared up at the ceiling. He knew he'd woken her up a few times when he'd gotten out of bed to check on Evie. She'd gotten frustrated with him after the tenth time and told him to just bring her into bed because he was driving her crazy. Juice listened to her. Once his girls were both close and safe beside him, he found it a little easier to fall asleep. He woke up that morning with Evie still on his chest, but Angela was already up and making breakfast.

He hitched Evie up higher on his bare chest, his heart aching with love as she snuggled in closer to him. He put his lips to her head, breathing in deeply and enjoying the comforting smell of her baby shampoo.

He put Evie down in her little rocker before moving closer to Angela. Leaning against the counter, he studied her face, noticing the bags under her eyes. He could've sworn she'd slept just fine. Apparently, she was a lot better at pretending to sleep than he'd thought. "You okay, Angel?" he asked, brushing a stray hair from her face.

Angela's dark eyes met his as she sighed and nodded. "Yeah," she said, trying for a smile. She nodded towards the bottle warmer they had set up on the counter. "Wanna give her that bottle?"

Juice furrowed his brows in confusion. She only gave Evie a bottle when she was working and needed someone else to feed her. It was out of the ordinary now. Something was wrong. "You're not gonna..." he trailed off, gesturing to her chest.

"I'm exhausted," she lied, sighing again. The truth was she'd tried earlier that morning when he'd been asleep and had barely produced enough milk for Evie. She'd had to get some out of the bottles she had stocked in the fridge. They were running low on those too. Chloe had been on her for weeks about stress and breastfeeding. She'd thought it was all bullshit despite the way she'd noticed the decrease in the amount she was making. If she didn't start producing milk soon, she was going to have to switch to formula. She kept all of this from Juice though, he was on edge as it was. If he knew the stress his club was causing her was also affecting Evie, he'd try pushing them away even harder than he had before. "Thought you might want to feed her."

He didn't buy her lie for a minute; Angela loved breastfeeding, said it brought her and Evie closer. "What's going on?"

"Nothing. Just don't feel like being a cow today," she said, trying for a joke.

He frowned at her, seeing her joke for what it was; a way to cover what was really going on. "Bull shit," he said, his hand trailing up and down her arm "What's going on, Angel?"

"I couldn't...I don't have enough to feed her," she admitted, hanging her head. "I tried late last night, and she got...fussy so I had to get some out of the fridge. Tried to pump this morning and got barely enough to fill half a bottle."

Juice ran a hand over his hair, his eyes wide. "Jesus Christ, baby. Why can't you..."

"Chloe says its...a mixture of things. Might be my caffeine intake. I tend to drink more coffee while in lockdown," she explained on a shrug.

"Or it could be stress, right? 'cause of the explosion and shit?"

Angela took in a deep breath as she shrugged again. "Who knows? She'll get fed regardless. Might just have to switch her to formula for a little. Chlo said that's fine. She's old enough now."

"Goddamn, Angel. That's not good. You should be able to..."

She waved off his concern. "It's okay. I'm okay. Just a lot going on lately, that's all. Would you feed her, please?"

Juice nodded numbly, his mind reeling from what she'd just told him. "Yeah, 'course," he said, trying to give her a smile.

"Juice," she said, catching his attention as he walked away. "This has nothing to do with you, you know?"

He nodded, though he knew she was wrong. This had everything to do with him. If it wasn't for him, they wouldn't have been at the clubhouse that night. She wouldn't be so stressed out all of the time. They'd be happy and healthy and safe. Safer then they'd ever be with him there. He needed to get them out and soon. He tried to give her a smile again, succeeding a little more this time. "Yeah," he said softly. " 'course not."

"I mean, if anyone is at fault, it'd be mine," she said, laughing it off like it was nothing, but he saw the guilt written all over her face.

Juice's eyes darkened as he looked at her. "No, baby. This isn't your fault," he said, cupping the side of her face with a hand, his thumb dragging over her cheek. He caught her lips in a sweet kiss, trailing softer kisses across her cheek. He pulled her in closer, his hands rubbing up and down her back. "You just gotta relax, Mama."

She leaned into him, nuzzling her nose against his neck and breathing in his scent. She put her lips to his neck, kissing it softly. Her arms slid around his bare torso, hands rubbing up the planes of his back. He groaned as she applied just the slightest bit of pressure on his muscles. "Looks like I'm not the only one who needs to relax," she murmured, dotting kisses across his clavicle.

"What if you and Monk left for a few days, baby?" he asked, trying to stay focused as her hands massaged his back. At his question, her hands stopped moving and her whole body tensed up. That was not a good sign. "Got away from all this shit and relaxed."

She leaned back in his arms, her brows furrowed in confusion. "With you?"

He shook his head slowly. "No. Just you two. It'll be like a mother-daughter getaway. Just a few months."

She pulled away from him then, physically stepping away. "Months, Juice? Are you serious?"

"You have maternity leave still, don't you?" he asked shifting awkwardly. "You can work somethin' out with Skeeter. Get the cash to your Ma and aunt somehow. I just...think it'd be good for you, for Eves, if you just...went away."

She scowled at him as she put the egg white omellette she made for him on a plate and handed it to him. "Don't be ridiculous," she scoffed, grabbing the baby bottle and heading towards Evie. She picked up the baby and kissed her forehead. "Daddy's being silly, Monk. Saying he wants us to leave."

"It's not forever, Angel," he reminded her, sitting down at the table and digging into his omelette. "Just until all of this craziness stops. Jax is getting us out of guns and then I'll come get you and we'll all be safe."

"You want me to go into hiding?"

"Not hiding just...maybe somewhere where there's no charter. Just to be safe."

She stared at him in utter disbelief. "Juice, we're safe where we are. There's no safer place for us then surrounded by SAMCRO and its members. You don't think that if the Irish wanted to hurt us, they'd find us?"

Juice shook his head. "Not if you didn't want to be found."

"Bullshit. You of all people know how easy it is to find someone," she said, rolling her eyes at him. She met his gaze, surprised by the fear she found in his eyes, the desperation. "We're not going anywhere, Juice. Not anytime soon at least."

He hung his head in defeat, knowing she would fight against him at every turn. There was no way for him to convince her that she needed to leave. Her mind was already set, and he knew nothing would change it. Not at that moment anyway. He'd find another way to convince her; he usually did. At that moment, he didn't want to push the issue. He had to leave soon and didn't want to leave her in the middle of a fight. "Okay, baby."

Angela knew this wasn't the end of this discussion. Juice was giving in now, but his head was probably going through ideas of how to get his way. He'd tell her one thing and do another. Most of the time, he ended up actually getting his way. That's what scared her the most. "So...what are your plans for today?" she asked, sitting next to him with Evie still in her arms.

"Gotta head over to Jax's in a bit. Chibs said you should come, Tara's already there," he said around a mouthful of food.

"Mm, I'll pass on that one," she said, smiling at Evie as she unlatched from the bottle. She set it on the table and shifted her over her shoulder so she could burp her. "Need to go to work. Make sure Rigs is okay with Boner. Then I was gonna check in with Kenny and El. Make sure they're okay."

"You can go after," he suggested.

She raised an eyebrow at him, curious as to why he wanted her to go so badly. "I'm beginning to think that was less of a suggestion and more of an order."

He shook his head slowly as he swallowed. He'd never order her to do anything. Their relationship didn't work like that. If he really wanted her to go, and he told her it was important, she'd go. There was no need to order her around. As long as there was logic behind it, she usually had no problem doing what he told her to. "No orders here, baby. Just...wanted to have you guys close 'fore I left."

"Before you left..." she repeated, confused. "Goin' somewhere, dude?"

Juice grimaced; he'd forgotten to tell her. Scratching at the back of his neck, he sighed. "Yeah. Headin' up North for the day to sit down with the other west coast charters."

Angela frowned a bit as she nodded. "Oh okay," she said setting the bottle down and shifting Evie so she could burp her. "You really want me to go?"

He could tell she didn't want to, and he couldn't really blame her. "Nah, you're good, baby," he said, wiping his face as he sat back in his chair. He watched Angela as she rubbed her hand over Evie's back, murmuring things to her daughter before pressing her lips to her temple. Juice's heart ached with love for his two girls. He couldn't imagine being without them, but he would never forgive himself if anything ever happened to them. "You know I love you, right? That everything I do is for you and Monk?"

Her dark eyes met his, a small smile crossing her face. "Yeah. I know," she told him. His burner went off, a loud, annoying sound. "You gotta go?"

Juice sighed and nodded, pushing away from the table. He dropped a kiss to Evie's head before tugging on Angela's hair. She leaned her head back, giving him access to her lips. He laid a soft kiss on them, nuzzling his nose against hers once he pulled away. He kissed her once more, savoring the taste of her lips for a moment. "I'll be home tonight."

"Mm-kay," she said on a soft sigh. When he went to walk away, she grabbed his wrist to catch his attention. Getting to her feet, she met his gaze and held it. "I love you, Juice," she told him, her hand rubbing over Evie's back. "So much."

Juice gave her a small smile, setting his hand on her hip. He dipped his head to kiss her again, sliding his arm around her lower back to draw her and Evie in closer. It was a soft, loving kiss meant to convey the way he felt about her. Her kiss warmed the depths of his soul, relaxing him. He felt at peace right there with his girls held close to him.

His burner was still ringing. A constant, irritating sound. In that moment, he hated his club. Hated the way it was slowly destroying everything he loved. The way it was slowly destroying him. He could feel himself changing with every passing day, and he hated himself for it. He was inflicting this awful pain on his family. He was going to be the reason they got hurt. He didn't want them to leave, but he knew how selfish it was for him to let them stay. Letting them stay would mean they were in danger, and if they were hurt because of his own selfishness, he'd never forgive himself.

He kissed her, his thumb brushing over her cheek. "Gotta go get ready," he said, drinking in her features once more before putting his lips to hers and heading to the bedroom.

Angela stared after him, rocking Evie against her as she sighed. "He's going to be okay, baby girl. We just need to be strong for him, okay? He'll be okay. We're going to stay right here with daddy. We're safe here," she said, wondering if she was trying to assure her daughter or herself.

-----------------------

Chloe woke up the next morning, surprised that Happy was still asleep next to her. They weren't cuddled together by any means. He was laying on his stomach, one heavy arm draped over her torso, his hand curled around her hip, but that was the extent of it. She took the opportunity to look over the pieces on his arm, smiling at one of the Chinese symbols. She didn't know much Chinese, but that character was familiar to her. It was the symbol for 'angel'.

"This one for Ang?" she asked, knowing he was awake. She'd felt his eyes on her for a while.

He smirked and nodded. There were a few tributes to his family inked on his body. She'd found Angela's. The other four were more obscure; they were just for him to know about. "Took her forever to find it."

"Seriously? You didn't tell her?"

He shook his head, his fingers lifting off her hip and dragging over her bare stomach as he shifted to his side, propping his head up on his elbow. "Got it while I was inside the first time. She asked what it meant. Told her to figure it out. Kid must've spent weeks goin' through books lookin' for it."

"You wanted her to learn something," she stated knowingly. "And I'm willing to bet, that's where she got inspiration for that fish tattoo, huh?"

" 's a good piece for her," he said on a nod.

Chloe traced her fingers over his muscular arms. "The piece on her back's not bad either. That hard for you? Marking her with Juice's...symbol like that?"

"No," he answered honestly. "Was proud she didn't want the crow."

"Crow?"

Happy wasn't surprised she didn't know about the Old Lady crow or what it meant; she was pretty out of the loop when it came to club stuff. "Old lady tat. They all got 'em. Gemma, Lyla, Tara..."

"Tara has a tattoo?"

He nodded, a smirk on his lips. "Tramp stamp. Same tat as Gem has on her chest."

Chloe laughed loudly at the idea of it. "I would never have guessed that those two would have matching tattoos and that Angela almost got one too!"

"Was worried she'd want one. I'd a done it too. Hated it, but woulda done it for her," he admitted, his fingers drawing random shapes on her stomach.

"Really?"

" 's no reason not to. Ideas solid, design's not bad. Just..."

"Not original enough for your girl," Chloe filled in with a nod of understanding. She was silent a moment, her fingers tracing the designs on his arms as he continued to draw invisible designs on her stomach. "I'm worried about her."

Happy lifted himself up onto his elbows so he could see her better, and she instantly missed the weight of his arm across her stomach. "Why?"

"You're not?"

He nodded quickly. "Just want to know why you are."

Chloe scrunched up her nose as she thought of how to explain it to him. "She's just...she keeps it all in. Y'know? I get the feeling she has all of these doubts and fears and she won't tell me because she thinks I won't understand. And yeah, I probably won't since apparently there's some type of learning curve on this whole club thing, but I wish she'd try and explain. Just so she can stop bottling shit up."

Happy nodded in agreement. Ever since Kozik died, she had no outlet. No one "safe" to vent to. He'd tried a few times to get her to talk, but her fear of him doing something to Juice always prevented her from telling him the whole story. She was right to fear that too. If he caught wind that the idiot had hurt her again, he'd rip his balls off. "Been that way for awhile," he said on a sigh. "Won't talk to me. Guy she used to vent to...ain't around anymore."

"Kozik, right?"

"Yeah," he rasped, hanging his head as he thought of his fallen brother. "Good guy. Listened to her shit. Balanced her out. I tried, but she..."

"Doesn't want to sic the Tacoma Killer on her fiancée," Chloe finished with a smirk. "She talk to your Mom or Aunt at all?"

Happy actually chuckled at that idea. "Nah. Doesn't want to worry Ma and her Ma doesn't...they don't talk like that."

She nodded, letting out a long breath. "I'll keep trying. See if she'll open up."

" 'preciate it," he said on a nod.

"Why are you worried?" she asked, wondering if he'd answer her. Sometimes he opened up to her, others he didn't. She never knew with him.

He hesitated a bit, his jaw clenching for a moment as if he was considering how much to say. "Not worried just...guilty, I guess. 's my fault she came here, my fault she's with that idiot. 's all on me. Shoulda just let her stay in Tacoma."

"Why'd you move her out anyway?"

"Ma got sick. Wanted her to be closer to her," he answered with a shrug.

Chloe nodded, reaching out a hand to brush it over his cheek. His words warmed her heart. She had a hard time believing he was a killer when he talked about his family like that. His whole face softened when he talked about him. "You shouldn't feel guilty. You should feel...happy," she told him, laughing lightly. "You have given her everything, Hap. Without you, she wouldn't have met the man she loves, she wouldn't have her daughter. She wouldn't be the person she is. You made her great. That was all you, dude."

He smirked, shrugging off her compliments. Clearing his throat, he decided to change the subject before they got any deeper into his feelings. "How you doin'? Lot of shit to wrap your head around."

She smirked right back at him. She had a feeling he'd change the subject. Angela did the same thing when they got too close to something touchy-feely. " 'm fine. Honestly, I'm a little less worried now that I know your little nickname. Killers usually don't get killed," she said with a smirk. "Not easily that is."

Happy tilted his head to the side, his dark eyes narrowed as he studied her face. "You got a fucked up way of thinkin'."

Chloe laughed, sitting up slightly so she was closer to him. "And you don't?" she shot back. That earned her a rare smile from the killer. She reached out a hand and brushed it over his scruffy cheek again since he didn't seem to mind it when she did it before. She was starting to learn the do's and do not's of Happy Lowman. So far, she'd learned not to initiate any kind affection in public. In front of others, he was the boss. Behind close doors, he didn't mind as much. "Happy's your real name, isn't it?"

He raised an eyebrow at her. She was the first person to actually guess it. The rest of them asked for his real name, theorized over what type of Latin sounding name it could be. No one would ever guess that his Mama was just a hippie who named him Happy. "The kid tell you?"

"Nope," she answered, shaking her head. "That one I guessed myself."

"Clever girl."

Chloe laughed, rolling her eyes at him. "Was that a Jurassic Park reference, Lowman? Are you calling me a dinosaur?"

"Yeah. A real old lady," he muttered, smirking at her. It took both of them a second before they realized the inference. "Shit. Didn't mean..."

She laughed again, rubbing her hand over his head. "I am under no illusions that I'm your Old Lady nor do I want to be part of that crazy club. You don't have to worry about that shit with me, Hap. I honestly don't care. I'm with you. Title's not necessary."

He nodded, leaning forward to kiss her. It was surprising to him how easily it was to be affectionate with her. Most of the time, it was impulsive. She'd do or say something, and he'd instinctively lean in to kiss her or touch her. "Good."

Chloe pulled away from him with a small smile. "What're your plans for today, bad boy?"

"Club shit," he said, groaning as he flipped onto his back. "Headin' up North for a bit."

"Juice goin'?" she asked, propping herself up on her elbow next to him. At his nod, she sighed. "Maybe try and get in his head a bit. 'm worried about him too." He gave her a dark, almost jealous look at which she rolled her eyes. "What he does, how he feels affects Angela. If he's planning on doing something stupid, then you should stop him 'fore it goes too far."

He sighed, nodding in agreement. "Do my best."

Chloe smiled, patting his chest before getting up out of bed. "C'mon, Lowman. Let's go get you cleaned up before you gotta go. I'll scrub your back for ya. Make those tattoos shine."

Happy smirked, getting up with a grunt and following after her. He watched her ass as she walked in front of him. "You gonna let me ink ya soon?"

She turned around and raised an eyebrow at him. "We'll see."