Angela stared at the deserted backyard in front of her, the moonlight cast an eerie glow on the toys Tessa had left strewn about the yard. As much as she liked talking to Jo, seeing her unlocked its own set of demons. The gene for the Ortiz smile must be a damn strong one because not only did she find it in her daughter, but Jo had it too. It hurt every time either of them smiled, left the angry wound Juice's death had left behind raw and bleeding. She'd headed out to her car and pulled out the little prescription bottle Juice kept in her glove compartment. There was one joint left inside of it, a remnant of their happier times. Of nights they spent out on their mountain, passing a joint back and forth while talking about everything and nothing. She'd grabbed the joint along with the matte black lighter he'd given her, her thumb rubbing over the dark angel wings on its side as she made her way to the Alvarez's backyard for a brief respite from the hell that was her life.

She brought the joint to her lips, taking a long toke and holding it in for a moment before she let it out in one, smooth exhale as she pulled her knees up to her chest, her heels pressed against the cold iron of the heavy patio chair. The first couple of hits had left her coughing like a rookie, but she was used to it now. The marijuana was slowly taking its effect, calming her down, numbing her pain. The scent alone comforted her. Reminded her of him. Closing her eyes, she could picture him sitting next to her, watching her like he always did, his loving gaze making her heart do flip-flops.

The sound of the patio door opening behind her shattered the illusion. Looking over her shoulder, she was surprised to see Marcus step out, two tumblers and an intricate glass bottle filled with a light amber liquid in his hands. He raised his eyebrows when he spotted her. "Didn't know anyone was out here," he stated, setting the tumblers down.

"Why'd you bring two glasses then?" she asked dryly, flicking the ash off the joint into the ashtray on the table.

"Closed a deal today. Gonna sign the paperwork tomorrow pero got an old friend comin' over to celebrate tonight 'fore shit gets crazy," he explained, nodding towards the back door. "Should be here with some Cubans any time now."

Angela sighed, there went her peaceful high. "I'll get outta your hair then."

Marcus shrugged a shoulder. "Quedate, mija," he said softly, setting his hand on her shoulder and squeezing it. "You 'n' me, we got some shit to talk about." (Stay.)

She gritted her teeth together; he was the last person she wanted to talk to. "Marc..."

He proceeded as if he hadn't heard her. "Been meaning to tell you I'm sorry for what happened to your husband pero you knew it had to be that way, right? He offered up his club. I take that offer 'n' it means war, entiendes?" (But...understand?)

She hated how well she understood what he did. Hated that she saw logic in it. Marcus had called Jax to protect his family, his club. He'd do anything to keep the peace. He'd killed his own son for that reason, no wonder he hadn't hesitated in turning Juice in. "If he didn't make you that offer..."

Marcus' eyes softened a bit as he sat down at the chair across the table from her. He reached out for the joint, and she handed it over to him. "I help you, I start a war," he repeated before taking a long toke. "I let you go, least I could've given you a head start."

He'd confirmed what she always believed; if Juice had listened to her, they'd still have a fighting chance. "Told him not to tell you," she said, hating how thick her voice sounded, the tears filling her eyes. She grabbed the joint from him again, taking another toke. "He promised he wouldn't and then he...he..."

" 'ey relajate nena," he murmured, reaching out his hand to set it on hers. "Nothin' you can do to change it. Best to let it go." (Relax, little girl)

"Yeah," she agreed on a breath. The sound of the back gate opening made her sit up a little more, wiping at her eyes as she tried to pull herself together. A tall figure came out of the bushes, bearded and tattooed, holding two thick cigars in his hand. Nero Padilla had never intimidated her in that silly sweater of his.

Nero greeted Marcus with a brotherly handshake first before nodding to Angela. " 'ey Angie," Nero greeted, a warm sadness in his eyes that told her he knew everything. "Heard you were here. How you doin'?"

"Been better," she replied honestly, watching as Nero pulled out a cigar cutter and expertly prepared both cigars. Marcus handed her back the joint, and she sucked in a long toke.

Nero cleared his throat, drawing her attention to his face. "I'm real sorry about what happened to Juice, mami," he stated sincerely. "Didn't think it'd go that far."

She bobbed her head, exhaling the smoke and watching the plumes rise into the night sky. "How'd you find out?" she asked, her voice sounding rough in her own ears. "About Darveny. Did he tell you?"

"Shit, was that what happened?" Nero asked incredulously, his eyebrows raised. "Mama, I figured that out on my own. Suspected it the day it went down 'n' Jax, man, he denied it pero I knew. Saw Jax make some crazy decisions, so I called him on it again. Told him I knew he was lyin'. Didn't say shit about Juice, though. Knew it'd put your family on the line. Didn't want to do that."

She flinched at the sound of his name, the same visceral reaction she always had. It'd been two weeks, and she still couldn't bring herself to say it out loud. "Jax said it had to have been him. Wouldn't believe him when he denied it. Was goin' on about how he betrayed him," she explained, swallowing thickly. "Jax kept pressin' him, y'know? 'Do this and we're square, do that and we're square'. All he wanted was to just be good with the club. That's it. He woulda done anything to make it all okay. Anything to stay with his family. Us and them."

Nero and Marcus exchanged dark, knowing glances. "Jax is off the rails, 'mano. This shit is going to get messy," the Mayan president stated, shaking his head.

"Why you think I'm gettin' out while I still can? That kinda shit can pull you under 'til you're drownin'," he said, waving his hand around as he talked. Angela flinched again; she knew exactly how that went. She was already drowning, had been for a while. He must've seen her reaction because he grimaced, "Sorry, Mama. Didn't mean to..."

"No," she said, shaking her head. "You're right. You should get out Nero, and leave that poisonous woman behind too because if Jax doesn't kill everything you love, she will."

Marcus gave her a warning look, and she sunk down deeper into her chair feeling like a child who'd been chastised. "Just focus on your farm, 'mano. Gettin' your kid and your family safe. Get outta the danger zone."

Angela could hear Evie fussing over the baby monitor and stubbed her joint out. "That my cue," she stated, getting to her feet with a sigh. Both men stood with her out of respect, and she fought the urge to smile. She hugged Marcus, kissing his cheek. "Buenas noches, Marc."

"Give Eva a kiss for me," the Mayan president replied, a proud look in his eyes.

She nodded, tucking a stray hair behind her ear. "Yeah, 'course," she muttered before looking at Nero. "Good to see you, Nero."

To her surprise, Nero also pulled her in a tight hug. "You take care of yourself, mija," he told her, a warm look in his dark eyes. "Come visit the farm some time, 'ey? Sure baby girl would love all the animals. We'll take good care of her."

Angela almost laughed in his face at the idea of Evie going to his ranch to play with Gemma, Jax, and the Teller boys. As much as she loved Thomas and Abel, she didn't want her daughter anywhere near the SAMCRO Queen or president. "Sure. Thanks," she muttered, trying to give him a smile. Evie, of course, had impeccable timing, and her wailing was heard loud and clear over the baby monitor. "That's my girl. Con permiso." (Excuse me.)

They both waved her off as they sat back down, already talking about something else in their smooth Spanish. Their voices were smooth and silky, comforting for a reason she couldn't put her finger on. A part of her wanted to stay and listen to them talk, but her daughter's crying was insistent so she climbed the steps back to her room, shucking off Juice's sweatshirt as she went so as not to expose her daughter to the smell of weed so early in her life. "Hey Eves," she greeted, approaching the small crib. Evie had pulled herself to her feet and was clinging to the rail. She lifted her up and out easily, kissing her chubby cheek. "Why you crying, little monkey?"

Evie quieted down, her tiny hand grabbing onto the front of her tanktop while she nuzzled her face into her neck. Angela's heart warmed as she rubbed her hand over the small girl's back. "Just wanted some love, huh, baby girl? You knew Mama was feeling lonely, didn't you?" she murmured, rocking back and forth before sitting down on the bed. "I love you so much, Evie-doll. We're going to be okay. You, me, 'n' your brother. Visit Auntie Jojo in Texas, get some barbeque ribs and cowgirl boots. How's that sound?"

Evie cooed back at her, babbling a bit as if she understood. "Sounds good, huh, Monk?" she asked her daughter with a soft laugh. "Then that's what we'll do."

--------------------

Kenny's hands shook as he walked into Angela's office. He didn't know why he was so nervous, but he couldn't get them to stop. She was on the phone with a client and rapidly typing things into the computer, but she spared a minute to give him a grin and gesture for him to sit down. He knew if he wanted to, he could tell her it was an emergency, and she'd hang up; no question about it. Her "kids" always came first. Be it Evie, Ellie, him, or Bones; she'd drop everything and tend to their needs no matter what. It was why he loved her so much. Tugging down the beanie on his head, he took a deep breath and went over to Evie's play pen. She'd pulled herself onto her feet and was currently reaching out a hand to him, a huge grin on her face showing off her tiny teeth.

"Hey sis," he whispered, lifting her into his arms. Evie babbled back at him, reaching for his nose and giggling when he wrinkled it. He reached into the play pen and handed her the stuffed bulldog inside. She grabbed onto its arm and waved it about while he carried her over to the office chair. He settled down with her in his lap, taking the bulldog from her and making it dance on her leg. She giggled like it was the funniest thing in the world.

Angela hung up the phone and let out a long breath. "What's up, Kendo?" she asked, giving him a smile.

"Lyla said the adoption is done. Just gotta go to get a notary to help sign everything. Said we could do it sometime this week," he said, resting his chin on the top of Evie's head. She didn't seem to mind and leaned back into him.

The smile that spread across Angela's face was the first genuine one he'd seen in weeks. "Really? I mean, I saw the missed call from Ly, but I didn't realize..." she trailed off, getting to her feet and moving to hug him. She kissed his forehead before dropping a kiss to her daughter's head. "You hear that, baby girl? Kendo's officially going to be your big brother!"

Kenny smiled in response, feeling whatever nerves he had ease away as he held Evie closer. He looked up at Angela, swallowing hard. "Ang, I wanna...I want to change my last name."

Her brows furrowed in confusion. "Oh Kenny, you don't have to..."

He knew she'd fight him on it, but she didn't understand. He wanted a new life, one that was club free. Piney Winston was one of the founding fathers of SAMCRO, Opie Winston, a member who'd given his life for it. He didn't want to be associated with that. Not by any means. He'd talked it through with Ellie the night before, and she'd been for it. Told him it wasn't fair that her name would change when she got married, but his would always carry with it that cruel reminder of all he'd lost because of the club. "I loved my mom and my pops and grandpa, but look where they ended up. I don't want that. I want to be different. I want something new 'n' Kenny Ortiz don't sound so bad, right? If we move, people might not even know I'm adopted. They'd think I was yours, and I...I like that. No rehashing my tragic backstory."

"You sure, dude?" she asked, pushing his hair back from his forehead. "There's no pressure. You're going to be my son no matter what."

"Positive," he said on a nod. "I know Juice 'n' I didn't talk much, but I admired him. He was smart, goofy, and he loved his family more than anyone I've ever seen. I'd be proud to carry his name."

A tear slipped down Angela's cheek as she nodded, leaning down to kiss his forehead again. "Love you, Kenny," she murmured, sniffling a bit.

He frowned looking down at Evie, who tilted her head back up to look at him, her dark eyes sparkling. "Look what I did, Monk. I made Mama cry. How do we fix this?" he asked, the baby. "Do we give Mama kisses? Let's give Mama kisses."

Standing, he pulled Angela into a hug while Evie pressed her open mouth to her mother's cheek in the sloppiest kiss ever. Angela laughed, hugging them both. For the first time in a long time, he was hopeful that things would get better. That they'd move past losing one of their family and move on to become stronger. They'd be happy again; it was just going to take some time.

--------------------

Early the next morning, Angela stood between Kenny and Ellie, Evie perched on her hip as they stared at the black doors of Diosa Norte. She hated the thought of bringing her baby girl inside a brothel, but it was for a good cause. At least that's how she justified it. Bones scratched his head, narrowing his eyes at the sign above the door. "What is this place?" he asked, looking utterly confused.

"A whorehouse," Kenny replied flatly, a look of disgust on his face.

"Ken," Angela chastised with a scowl. "It's a companionator service."

Bones furrowed his eyebrows together. "Is that a thing?"

"No, Ang is sugarcoating it," Ellie said, looking uneasy. "Its my stepmom's brothel."

"Your stepmom has a brothel...and you're signing your adoption papers there?" Bones asked incredulously.

Kenny shrugged a shoulder. "Ly's a notary. Marc's already closing his deal with Nero, so why not sign both at once?"

He rubbed at his eyes under his glasses. "Is that even legal?" he asked, looking towards Angela. "Doesn't there need to be a judge and stuff?"

She shrugged a shoulder. "Ly said Nero got us a John Judge to sign all the papers. Its just easier to do it here then at a courthouse," she said, trying not to think about the real reason why they were doing it at Diosa. It was because she and Kenny both agreed they wanted Juice's name on the documents and no legitimate judge would allow her to forge her husband's signature. Not when he wasn't legally dead. And he never would be. Just another reason she couldn't find closure. She couldn't prepare him, couldn't bury him, couldn't even legalize his death without raising huge red flags. Kozik had slipped under the radar, but the Sons had been under the law's microscope since the Aquino shooting, and she knew there was no way she'd be able to pull that off. "We should head in there 'fore he leaves."

Bones walked up first, holding the door open for all of them, his eyes wide as he followed them in. He stopped short when he saw the four Mayans standing around the bar; he'd only just gotten used to the Sons, he'd never had any interaction with their rivals. "Woah," he muttered.

Ellie smirked at him, her hand slipping into his and giving it a squeeze. "Relax, Leo."

Angela raised an eyebrow at the two of them, looking over at Kenny who rolled his eyes in response. She was about to say something when Marcus walked up to them. "Good to see you guys. Judge is waiting," he said, nodding over to the bar area where Nero and Lyla were standing with a nervous looking older gentleman. The Mayan president held out his arms for Evie. She went to him willingly, giggling when his mustache tickled her face as he kissed her cheek. "You ready for a new brother, tesoro?"

Nero smiled at the baby girl before nodding his greeting to Angela. " 'ey Mama."

"Nice place you got here," she stated, gesturing to the well decorated place.

" 's not mine anymore. It's all his now," he explained nodding to Marcus. "Signed the papers today."

"One step closer to that farm, huh?" she asked, feeling hopeful for the first time in awhile. If he could leave behind his own little gang and get out of this place, she should be able to too.

Nero nodded. "That's the dream."

Lyla smiled warmly at them as they approached. "Looks like the whole family's here, huh?" she asked before grimacing. "Oh shit, Angie. I didn't mean...I know Juice isn't..."

Kenny was the one to interject. "It's okay. He's here in spirit," he replied with a small smile. "Right, Ang?"

Angela mussed his hair and nodded. "Right. Let's get this done."

The process was relatively simple, just a few signatures on the dotted line. Lyla first, then Angela, and finally Kenny. He signed it with a flourish before looking up at the judge nervously. "So...is that it?"

The judge put the papers in a folder and nodded. "Pretty much. Congratulations to you both. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to work."

"Next session is on the house, your honor," Marcus called after him, chuckling as the door closed behind him. He looked down at Evie and raised his thick eyebrows. "Don't think he was interested, 'ey tesoro?"

Evie giggled again before reaching out to Kenny, cooing eagerly. Kenny grinned, taking him from Marcus. "Hey Eves. Guess what? You're legally my baby sister!"

Ellie laughed, hugging her brother and her adopted sister. "I'm so happy for you, Ken," she told him.

Bones joined in on the group hug. "One big nerdy family!"

Angela smiled at them before moving to hug Lyla. "Thanks for all this," she murmured. "Promise I'll take care of him wherever we end up."

Lyla shrugged as she pulled away. "I'm sure you will. Better than I could've done. I love Ken, but he won't talk to me. Not like he opens up to you. It feels right," she admitted on a laugh. "Speaking of SAMCRO kids, did you hear about Abel?"

"No. What happened?"

"He dug these deep scratches into his arm and when the teacher asked what happened, he blamed Gemma. Can you believe that?" she asked in disbelief. "That poor boy. I wonder what's going on there."

Angela felt sick to her stomach just picturing it, thinking what Tara would've said. She should've been there for that boy, been there to help him through the grief of losing his mom. Hadn't she promised Tara she'd watch out for them? "Shit. Where is he now?"

"With Wendy at Jax's place. Child Protective Services wouldn't let him stay with Gemma," Lyla replied on a frown. "Sad, isn't it? Poor Gemma, all she wanted was to be close to her boys."

She nodded a bit, still reeling from the information. As if to make things worse, the front door opened and in came Montez followed by Quinn. She froze to the spot, then relaxed a bit when she felt Marcus's hand on her shoulder while the rest of the Mayans closed in around her and her kids as if to protect her from whatever the Sons had in store.

"You seen Gemma?" Montez asked, his eyes sweeping the room before landing on her and narrowing in a glare; no doubt he was thinking of the last time they'd seen each other when she'd made her getaway with Juice.

Angela smirked back at him, tilting her chin up confidently. Quinn chuckled from behind him, nodding his greeting to her. "How's it going, kid?"

"Just peachy," she replied, hating his casual tone.

Quinn nodded slowly. "He misses you, kid."

She didn't have to ask who he was implying. For a moment, she was strangely comforted by the idea Happy missed her because, deep down, she missed him too. Anger quickly replaced that emotion, though. He could miss her all he wanted; that didn't change what had happened between them. "He can go fuck himself," she muttered, turning away and looking at her daughter and her new son. "You guys ready to go?"

Kenny nodded, hitching Evie up higher on his hip. She clung to his shirt, babbling to him while he talked to her. Bones and Ellie followed her out, still holding hands as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Her heart warmed at the sight of them. The four of them made a pretty picture of four, happy kids. They were the reason she was staying afloat, the reason she'd yet to succumb to the immense feeling of grief threatening to swallow her whole.

Marcus shot out to grab her wrist, stopping her from moving. He pulled her in closer, kissing her temple. She met his gaze, doing her best to keep the shock off her face. The small endearment was meant to send a message loud and clear to Montez and Quinn. She was under his protection now; no one was to touch her or her family. "Gracias," she murmured, kissing his cheek quickly.

Quinn looked a little relieved as she walked by. He nodded to her quickly. "Take care, kiddo."

Angela walked into the Alvarez kitchen with Evie perched on her hip. Dia instantly descended on her. "Felicitaciones!" she exclaimed, pulling them both into a hug. "Where's your my new nieto? I made my tamales famosos to celebrate him being official." (Congratulations...my new grandson...famous)

"Kenny asked if he could spend the night with Bones," she explained with a sigh as she set Evie down in Tessa's old high chair. "So as my first motherly duty, I allowed it. They have some video game they want to play at my house 'til all hours of the night. Figured someone should get use of that place."

Dia sighed in disappointment, muttering to herself about boys as she went back to the kitchen. Tessa came zooming in, her arms outstretched like an airplane before she wrapped herself around Angela's legs. "Angelita, where's my new nephew?" she asked, looking up at her with excited blue-hazel eyes.

Angela laughed, running her hand over Tessa's head. "He's busy playing with friends tonight. How was your day, T?"

Tessa shrugged a shoulder, already bored with the conversation before going over to bug Evie. Dia smiled warmly at the pair. "She's quite attached to her new niece and nephew."

"They love her too," she commented with a smile, setting Tessa's plate down in front of her and sitting at the table with Evie's bowl of baby food. "Huh, Evie doll?"

Dia set a plate down in front of her too. She wasn't hungry, though and pushed it away, earning a stern glare from the older woman. "Mija, you have to eat. You're getting too skinny."

Angela stared at the plate and sighed. It was true; she'd lost a few pounds over the past couple of weeks, but she couldn't bring herself to eat anything. Nothing tasted right without him. "I had a snack awhile ago," she lied. Dia's dark look didn't flinch, and she sighed. "Save me a plate. I'll eat later."

She gave her a doubtful look before sitting down herself. "Well, if you're not eating, lleva ese tray over to the warehouse for Marcus y los chicos," she said gesturing to the huge aluminum foil tray on the counter. "I'll take care of Eva. You go. Take a drive. Relax a bit. Maybe when you come back, you'll be hungry." (Take this...Marcus and the boys)

"Oh no. Its okay, Dia. I got this," she said, spooning some of the sweet potato mash into Evie's mouth. She took it hungrily, her little feet kicking up and down happily. Evie, like her father, was all about her fruits and veggies. She loved them.

Dia wasn't taking 'no' for an answer, though. Standing, she grabbed the tray and held it out to her. "Dale, take it now before it gets cold," she insisted, waiting patiently for Angela to stand. (Go)

With a roll of her eyes, Angela got to her feet, dropped a kiss to her daughter's head before taking the tray from Dia. "Marc know I'm coming?"

"I'll call him while you're on your way," she said shooing her away with her hands. "Go. Say hi for me."

With a heavy sigh, she headed back out to the Mazda. The drive over was relatively quick; the house was only about twenty minutes away from the Mayan's clubhouse. She pulled in next to the line of bikes, grabbing the tray with a grunt and kicking her door closed behind her.

Balancing the tray on her arm, she knocked on the door. Unlike SAMCRO's clubhouse, the Mayan "church" was the makeshift table in the center of the garage. They didn't have the same decorum as the Sons. They were more of a family. They all respected each other and took care of one another, a fancy church wasn't needed. The only thing that didn't change was the order in which they sat, that was where tradition won out. Marcus sat at the head of the table and the rest of his officers surrounded him. The front door opened, and she found Lino's face smiling back at her. " 'ey chiqui! That Dia's food? 'ey! Angelita brought the goods!" he exclaimed, opening the door wider and letting her in. "Come in! Come in! We were just playin' some poker."

Angela nodded, taking a deep breath and walking in. The Mayan brothers were mostly quiet as she approached. Some gave her warm smiles while others shot her cold glares; it seemed it wasn't easy for everyone to accept her back into the Mayan fold. Marcus gestured her over, and she set the tray down before going over to kiss his cheek in a sign of respect. "Dia wanted me to bring the tamales over," she stated awkwardly, gesturing to the tray. Looking around, she suddenly felt claustrophobic. This was the place where it all went down. This is where they took him from her. The last place she'd seen him alive. A lump rose to her throat as tears pricked at her eyes. Sniffling a bit, she swallowed hard and nodded. "So there they are. Enjoy."

Lino was the first to notice her distress. He draped an arm around her shoulders. "C'mon, chiqui. Let's get some air, yeah?" he suggested, leading her around to the front of the warehouse.

"Yeah," she breathed, nodding quickly. "That'd be...that'd be good."

He steered her to a bench, forcing her to sit down before taking a seat next to her. Reaching out, he rubbed her shoulder for a moment. "How you doin'?" he asked, a hint of amusement in his voice.

She let out a shaky breath and shook her head. A small smile threatened to show at the craziness of the situation. "On the verge of a mental breakdown, honestly," she said on a laugh. "Being back here is a total mindfuck."

Paulino pulled a joint from the pocket of his cut, lighting it up as he nodded. "Lotta memories here, huh?" he asked, waving around the joint as he exhaled his toke.

She fought against tears as the smell surrounded her. She'd been fine earlier when she toked up but for some reason, it was harder at that moment surrounded by the memories of the last moment she'd seen Juice. She could still see the look in his eyes as he said goodbye, feel the warmth of his final kiss. Wiping at her eyes, she cursed softly under her breath. "Sorry," she apologized on a sad laugh. "The smell and the place and its all just..."

"Ah. Your Son was a big pothead?"

"He owned part of a weed dispensary and colonic shop," she explained, taking the joint from him. "He always has...had...fuck." Her breath caught in her throat at the correction. Pressing her hand to her chest, she tried her best to ignore the unbearable pain that came with the correction. With a shaking hand, she gave Lino the joint back. "I can't do this, Lee. I can't breathe without him. It fuckin' hurts."

Paulino draped an arm over her shoulders, pulling her into his side. "I know, chiqui. I know. You 'member my girl 'Nessa?"

Angela did. He and Vanessa had dated about as long as she and Esai had. Longer even. Vanessa had hated her, treated her like shit because she was jealous of how close she and Lino were. "Yeah. What happened?"

"We was drivin' home from dinner one night. Our anniversary. And this drunk asshole in a fuckin' Hummer T-bones us. Her side," he said, taking another long toke off the joint as his voice grew thick. "I held her hand, watched while she died. Nothin' I could do about it."

"Shit, Lee. I'm sorry," she muttered. Talking with him like this made her feel like she was back in middle school, talking about her hopes and dreams with him. She'd known Lino since she was three years old and their mothers had met in a Wives Widowed by Cancer club. They'd spent most of their lives together until she moved to Tacoma and left her life in Oakland in the rear view. "How long it take you to move on?"

Lino shrugged a shoulder. "Still ain't over it," he admitted, ducking his head. "Been like eight years too. 'n' my new girl, Tiff, is great. Love her to death, but I ain't stupid. Soon as Jay comes back, they'll get back together. They were meant to be. Have been since high school."

"You don't know that."

"I want that, chiqui. I love her but not like I loved 'Nessa. She loves me but not like she loves Jay. Ya feel me? It works 'cause neither of want to be alone pero its not forever."

Angela could see sense in his logic, but there was no way she could actually be in a situation like that. Juice was it for her. She didn't want any other man's hands on her. "Just don't get hurt."

He shrugged again, looking out at the view as he exhaled smoke. "Can't hurt more than I did after losin' Ness. Never hurt that bad in my life. That shit don't go away."

She nodded in agreement. "Didn't think so," she muttered, leaning her head against his shoulder with a sigh. "You ever...feel her? Like her presence?"

"All the time."

She bit her lip, fighting against more tears. "I can't feel him," she admitted softly. "I can't...I went everywhere I could think of and I haven't been able to."

Paulino's dark eyes moved over her face for a brief moment before he shrugged. "Might take some time. What're those stages of grief? Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. You're in denial. You don't feel him 'cause you don't believe it. You work so hands on with death like every day 'n' this is the one death you couldn't touch. You couldn't see, so you're in some kinda crazy denial, yeah?"

Angela digested his words for a moment before shaking her head. "But I'm not in denial, Lino," she said, shaking her head. "I know he's gone. My asshole of a cousin wouldn't lie to me about that. So if he's gone, and I know it, why can't I feel him like I can feel my dad?"

"Maybe you're trying too hard," he suggested, taking a pensive toke. "Maybe...maybe your anger is blockin' it all. Stage number two is anger, right?"

"Lee, I've been so angry for so long, I don't even know what to do with it anymore," she admitted, hanging her head.

Paulino bobbed his head in a nod. "I feel ya, chiqui. I was so fuckin' angry after Nessa pero I got over it."

"How?"

He shrugged a shoulder, flicking the ash off his joint. "I killed that motherfucker that hit us," he answered honestly. "Made him hurt just like her."

Angela frowned, staring at the rings on her fingers. If she could, she'd kill Jax. Walk into that damn Scoops 'n' Sweets and just open fire. Kill them all for what they did to Juice. But she couldn't. Doing that would risk being put inside, and there was no way she was leaving Evie or Kenny because of her quest for vengeance. "You're lucky that was an option," she muttered, closing her hand into a tight fist.

"It was a temporary fix, though. I did it 'n' it felt fuckin' amazing and then I was just...empty. She was still gone, killin' that asshole didn't bring her back. You're better than that, Ang. You got your kids to hold on to, to lift you up 'n' shit," he said, gesturing with his hands as he spoke. "Let all that anger go. Ain't gonna do you no good."

She clenched her jaw, shaking her head. "How can I just let it go? My cousin, my own blood, murdered him. He..." her breath caught in her throat as she thought of Hap. "How do I forgive that?"

"I'm not saying forgive it. I'm saying forget it because that anger's just gonna fester and make you mean and bitter. I'm thinking you should just get the fuck outta Charming and Oakland. Start fresh, y'know?"

Angela smiled a bit. "His sister's in Texas, actually, keeps bugging me to go over there. Was waiting for Ken's papers to go through before I planned anythin' though."

"Good! Maybe once you get out there, surrounded by his family, you'll feel somethin'," he mused, draping his arm over her shoulders. "Til then, you got me, chiqui. Promised him and E I'd take care of ya, so here I am at your disposal. You need to talk to somebody, I'm your man. You just want to sit and smoke, I got you. Just like old times."

"Thanks, Lee," she said on a soft sigh. Talking to him had significantly lessened the weight she'd had on her shoulders since she'd lost Juice. "I've been a shit friend since I moved away. Sorry 'bout that."

He shrugged a shoulder, waving away her concern. "Ain't no thing. You had shit to do. I get it. Sever all ties 'n' shit. Missed you, though," he said passing her the joint.

She smiled sadly, bumping her shoulder with his. "Missed you too, loser."

They smoked in a comfortable silence for awhile, just enjoying each other's company. Then the backdoor opened. Angela looked over her shoulder lazily, tensing when she saw none other than Jax Teller standing there. She snorted, turning away from him as she exhaled the smoke.

"Got a minute?" he asked, though she was doing her best to ignore him.

Lino lifted his head, giving the SAMCRO President a confused look. "Me or..." he drifted off, looking between them. Jax nodded his head at her making Lino hesitate. "Chiqui, you good with this?"

"Dejame tu pistola," she told him, not bothering to look at the SAMCRO President. (Leave me your gun)

"En serio?" he asked, eyes wide. (Seriously?)

"Yeah. No lo voy a usar. Scout's honor," Angela insisted, crossing her heart. (I won't use it)

Paulino sighed, discreetly pulling his gun from his pants and setting it on the bench beside her before getting to his feet. She fought the urge to smirk as he puffed up his chest and stared Jax down. "You hurt her 'n' you're dead. I ain't playin'."

Jax nodded, lighting his own joint while he stepped around to face her. He looked absolutely wrecked. His light eyes watery and sad as they looked her over. She reached out for Lino's gun, setting her hand on it for her own sense of security. She felt stronger with it next to her, more powerful. "What could you possibly want from me?" she asked flatly.

He shrugged a shoulder, brazenly taking a seat next to her. "My son scratched himself. Deep, bloody fuckin' scratches and blamed it on Gemma," he stated, his voice thick.

"I heard."

He nodded again, swallowing hard before clearing his throat. "Later that night, he tells me it was Gemma that killed Tara," he explained, shaking his head. "Unser confirmed it. Said he walked in on the blood bath. Gemma shakin' on the floor."

Angela was too shocked by the news to remember her hatred for the man sitting next to her. "Unser was there?"

"Yeah. Probably killed the cop. Won't admit to that, though. He's got Jarry's ear, manipulated her into putting out an APB for me to protect my mother. 's why I'm here, hidin' out," he explained bitterly. "He's known the whole damn time. Was sendin' us and that cop on a goddamn wild goose chase."

Maybe it was the weed or maybe it was the insanity of it all, but it took all of Angela's self-control not to bust out laughing. It was all too much. Jax had killed everyone in his path on his rampage to avenge Tara's death, and in the end, the killer had been sitting quietly at his side the entire time. The smile that spread across her face was inevitable as she shook her head, bringing the joint to her lips. "Karma's a bitch," she stated, blowing out the smoke. Jax looked at her in disbelief which only served to make her smile more. "What? You thought I'd sympathize? You killed my husband after he did everything for you. You just couldn't let it go. You turned his brothers against him 'cause you couldn't let him have the life you wanted."

"Ang, he--"

She ignored his interjection, cutting him off with a scoff. "I'm not an idiot, Jax. We both know you had bigger fish to fry than him. Why the fuck couldn't you just leave us alone? He didn't do anything but follow exactly what you told him to do."

"He offered up club intel to Alvarez. It was--"

"Only after you backed him into a fucking corner!" she seethed, her fists clenched in anger. "You ran him out of his town, away from his family! He was desperate! What the hell was he supposed to do?"

He ran a hand over his face and shrugged a shoulder. "I don't know," he murmured pensively. "I'm sorry, Angie."

"You're sorry," she mocked, curling her hand around the grip of Lino's shiny silver gun and getting to her feet. She didn't raise it, but she made sure he knew it was there; that she had the power this time. "Fuck you."

Jax glanced at the gun then met her gaze before nodding. "Do it."

She shook her head slowly, chuckling to herself. "You want me to kill you?" she asked with a sadistic smile. Her thoughts went back to what Lino had said before, about how killing the man who'd killed his girl hadn't helped him in the long run. Somehow, she believed him. As rewarding as putting a bullet through Jax's thick skull would be, it was too easy. Too quick. Jackson Teller deserved to suffer. And oh, how he was suffering. She could see it in his eyes. Not only had he lost Tara, but he had to live with the knowledge his mother had been the person who killed her. Live with the guilt that the countless other people he'd put in the ground to avenge his dead wife was all for nothing. Plus, killing Jax meant Abel and Thomas would be sent to live with Gemma, and she'd promised her late friend she'd take care of those boys. She wasn't about to let them live with their mother's murderer. "Believe me, I want to, but I'm not you, Jax. I don't have that taste for vengeance. I know your boys need you, as fucked up as that is. And I know you'll suffer far more if I let you live than if I do what's easy for you and end it all."

The sound of motorcycles approaching filled the air, and Angela sighed, raking a hand through her hair while she watched the rest of the Sons pull in. She cursed under her breath, giving Jax one last, hard glare. "You did this to yourself, you have to suffer the consequences," she stated before slipping back into the clubhouse to avoid talking to the other Sons. The second she stepped inside, she ran straight into Lino. Tilting her head back, she looked up at him with a curious expression. "You hear all that?"

"Yeah, thin walls. Proud of you, chiqui. That was some real hard truth you laid out for him," he said, slinging his arm over her shoulder before holding out his hand. "Gun, please."

She handed him his gun, watching as he tucked it into the holster hidden by his cut. "Felt good to lay it all out like that."

"Good." He nodded over to where Marcus was standing with the rest of the Mayans. "Pres flipped when I told 'im I left you out there. Said you didn't need that shit 'n' I shoulda taken you outta there," he explained, smiling a bit as they headed towards the group. "Had to physically stop him from comin' out there. I knew you were fine. No reason to put whatever weirdo partnership we got goin' with the Sons in jeopardy 'fore it even starts. You can handle that gringo without Marc comin' in to save the day."

"Just wanted to make sure you were okay, mija," Marcus said, giving Lino a disapproving look. "You been through a lot already. Didn't want to add on to it."

"Gracias, Marc," she replied appreciatively. The door opened and in walked Jax, followed by the rest of SAMCRO. She tensed instinctively when saw Happy standing there, his dark eyes surveying her. "I'm gonna head out."

Marcus nodded, glancing at the group quickly. "Good idea," he acknowledged, before leaning over to kiss her forehead. Another show of love, of his protection in front of the crew that was rapidly approaching. "Tell Dia, thanks."

"Yeah," she rasped. Her eyes went to Hap, catching the pained look that quickly passed over his face. She wanted to run to him, hug him tightly, and just fall apart so he could pick up the pieces as he'd always done for her in the past. But she stopped herself. That Happy was gone. The one that had replaced him had taken away the one person she loved the most. She'd never be able to forgive him for that. Taking a deep breath, she turned her back on him and headed out the door without looking back.