Disclaimer: Mentions of war, blood and violence.

Also: Added the official "guide" for the different meanings of eye glows. I would like to think that Gaster's are the same as theirs so I am going to add this picture in every chapter so you guys can read up on it etc.

11XX

Everyone deserves a family.
Because it is just not fair to face the world all alone. They should give you the tools to succeed during hardships and stand by your side when you are in trouble.

However, you had no such luck to be born into such a family. In fact, you had none. You were the child of two humans, who loved each other with all their heart. But for you, there was no place left. You never knew why or how, but eventually as you grew older, you stopped asking these questions.

You were found by two monsters, all alone in the depths of the forest, and they took you in. Despite the strange looks some monsters gave you and the adjustment of raising a human child, monsters grew used to you and you eventually became part of the family.

Of course, there were always exceptions and monsters were suspicious, but you learned to tune these kinds of talks and glances out almost too perfectly. Both King Asgore and Queen Toriel met you when you were still a baby since your parents needed their approval to keep you with them.

Toriel was quite fond of you as a baby. She occasionally made smaller visits to see you.

Monsters and humans somewhat lived in peace on the surface to that time. They both had their own kingdoms and they also tried functioning and living together, but it would be a lie if someone said that there was no tension between both races.
When things didn't go so well, one always managed to blame the other. The king of the monsters, Asgore, always tried to resolve matters peacefully but of course, not everyone was going along with it.

Years passed and as you grew older, you learned basic skills such as reading and writing but you also managed to control your own magic. You had to be careful around the other monsters, since your magic was stronger than theirs.

Things seemed to be perfect almost, but no one was ready for what life had for them in store next.

War broke out between monsters and humans, as humans feared that monsters would try to absorb human souls and overthrow them eventually.

And this day would be remembered by everyone:

"(Y/N), run!", screamed your mother as she got harshly grabbed by a human.
The whole village was on fire, the sky painted red and stained with dark gray, almost black smoke. You scurried back onto your feet, wiping the tears and your father's dust off your face. Everything was blurred and you could barely hear what your mother was saying to you.

"Don't worry, girl. We will set you free from these monsters.", said another male to you with a short smile.
Then, his expression hardened again, and he turned back to your screaming and crying mother. She couldn't escape this. Not until it was over. And you knew exactly how it would end. You were shaking from fear and as they landed another strike onto your dying mother, a shiver went through your entire body.
Your mind was clouded but the only thing that felt right to do in that moment, was to act.

Or rather, not to act, but to fight.

You were too young to have to endure all this. A 15-year old girl like you should not have to go through such horrific events.

Without hesitation, you snatched the dagger from the sheath that the man had tied around his waist and ran towards the male, who was torturing your mother. The soldier yelped in response and tried to grab you by the arm but with one swift move, you evaded him.

Burning inside, you tackled the man and grazed his cheek with your dagger. The man shrieked as he made contact with the ground and let out a loud groan: "What the hell are you doing, you stupid girl? Your enemy is right in front of you! Kill her!"

"Yes, my enemy is indeed right in front of me.", you said and swung your dagger for a second time. To no surprise, the man was much stronger than you and easily overpowered you. You grazed his shoulder before he threw you off him and ordered his partner to hold you back.

You struggled and screamed but to no avail. As the soldier went back onto his feet, he wiped off the blood on his face with the back of his hand: "Okay, let's finish this and then I will deal with you." Your mother was down on her knees and tried throwing attacks at him. But they were too weak. He easily dodged them, or they didn't leave a mark when they hit.

You screamed for your mother again and she looked at you with tears in her eyes.

"I am sorry, my dear. I wanted to protect you until the very end, but it seems like I can only do it until here." With these words, she summoned another surge of magic, but it rushed past her attacker.

Instead, it hit the man, who was holding you down and blew off his head in one piece. His body went limp and thumped onto the floor.

Before you could realize what had happened, you saw how the soldier lunged his spear deeply into your mother's soul and it shattered into pieces.

Just like your entire world did in that moment.

She gave you another small smile before her entire body dissolved into a cloud of dust, only to be remembered as a memory.

There was nothing left of her.

You screamed loudly and picked up the spear that belonged to the fallen soldier: "I'll kill you for that. I'LL KILL YOU!"

Rage burnt in your eyes, and you gathered all your strength for this single attack. Your muscles tensed and you could feel the magic inside of you. As quick as the wind, you shot towards him and plunged the spear right through his chest.

The soldier looked at you one last time in pure horror, before his eyes went dim and he fell to the ground.

It was over.

But there was nothing left.

.
.
.
Nothing.

As everything turned more silent and you listened to the flames prickling around you, reality came flooding back to you.

They are gone.

They are all gone.

Tears started to stream down your face again.

What was there left to do for you?
Why should you keep going?

You thought about the moment, where your mother smiled at you for the very last time in her life.

She did this to protect you.

You can't give up now.

You must be determined.

Before the soldiers found you, you and your family tried to get to safety by crossing abandoned towns and cities that were no longer the center of the ongoing fights.

Unfortunately, humans had sent out patrols to exactly these places to make sure no monsters would slip by.

They thought you were one of them, captured by monsters to later be executed.

But you are not them. You have never been. Humans have never done you any good. They have never done anything for you. You never needed saving. It was humans who abandoned you in the first place.

Your parents saved you.

And that was exactly what they did in their last moments as well. You can't let these efforts go to waste.

But where to go? You did not know where exactly that shelter, or safety was.

Was it even still there or could it have been overrun by humans already? You had no answer to any of it. But you had to keep going. If you stayed here for too long, you would probably be found by other humans again and if they saw the blood on your hands, they would figure out what has been going on.

You wiped your hands on your shirt as an attempt to clean off some blood, but it was no use. Only now you realized that you have been trembling this entire time. You were so deep in your own mind that you didn't notice it.

Tying the dagger around your waist, you started to make your way into a random direction, hiding behind rubble and broken buildings whenever a strange noise was heard. You were scared to death, and you could not tell anymore if the dust in the air were ashes from the countless fires or countless souls, taken from innocent monsters.

You did not want to think too much about it.

In fact, you couldn't.

Countless thoughts manifested in your head, but they slipped away almost immediately.

It felt like a buzzing mess of voices, echoing through your head and sometimes, when things startled you or scared you, it all went silent, and you couldn't process a single thought.

Your senses were numbed but at the same time you felt like you were charged by thunder.

It felt so strange, and you did not know that a person could ever feel so much and so little at once. It felt like an invisible force was urging you to keep going and your body almost moved by itself.

As you walked through broken buildings and burning flames, you looked for someone, anyone, who could help you to get out of here.

For something or someone to end this entire war and bring you back home to mom and dad.

Something snapped you out of your thoughts.

It was some kind of rattling.

Your senses immediately sharpened, and you hid behind some rocks to find the source of this unsettling sound.

You heard voices and the clanking of metal against metal. There was a massive fight going on. You slowly approached the area from where you believed the source to be at.

A skeleton was standing there, its back tightly pressed against the stone wall behind it.

The humans laughed and slowly approached it and it mustered all its strength and froze one of the humans.

His soul turned blue and with a set of floating hands, that were made out of blue magic, he picked up a sword. Lifting the human up into the air and having the magic hands point the tip of the blade at that human, the skeleton withdrew its blue magic from the human, and he fell for a moment. But only for a moment. The sword impaled him and killed him immediately. Blood splattered everywhere and the male soldier was still twitching lightly as the rest of his strength was leaving his body.

Frozen by shock of its actions, the skeleton stood there and stared at the corpse. It covered its mouth in fear and started shaking again, breathing quickly and heavily. It did not realize that the other human was raising his weapon to attack.

Without thinking, you jumped out of cover and grabbed the skeleton's arm to pull it out of the attack range of the female human.

The sword's blade scraped your back, and you yelped in pain.

The skeleton stumbled to the ground but managed to catch itself with its hands. You trembled slightly and whipped out your dagger and tried to attack the warrior, but it only managed to graze her side. She yelped in pain and stumbled backwards slightly, giving you the opportunity to push her into the same sword that had impaled the other soldier before.

You sighed in relief but tensed when your soul suddenly started feeling heavy. A faint blue glow was emitting from your ribcage. The skeleton had used the exact magic on you that it had used just moments ago on the soldier. It turned you around so you could face it. A frightened expression on its face and its floating hands holding another weapon. You immediately relaxed your fingers to drop the dagger. It fell with a loud clunk to the floor. It made the skeleton flinch.

The voice sounded deep but somewhat skittish. It was very distorted and confusing to you.

Why is this skeleton not speaking the same language as you?

You tried to move but winced in pain as the slash on your back started burning again.

"I don't know if you can understand me. But I am not your enemy. I was raised by monsters, and I have always been on their side. I only tried helping you."

Is this how you would die?

By the hand of the monster, you chose to protect?

Heavy footsteps approached you quickly and in the corner of your eye you saw the colors white, gold, and purple.

"Stop! Please, set her down." It was Asgore's deep and soothing voice.

The skeleton hesitated but looked at him anyway.

"She is one of us. I can promise you that. Please, let her down."

The skeleton was fighting with himself, pondering if this was the right decision after everything he has just been through.

He looked at Asgore once more, who gave him a soft and comforting look. The skeleton sat you gently down and you breathed out in relief.

"Thank you.", you said and looked at the skeleton. However, there was not much time to talk as arrows began shooting at you.

Asgore quickly picked the skeleton and you up and rejoined with Toriel to get to safety and recover.
.

.

.

The skeleton had been silent ever since it happened. He was constantly shaking, gazing off into nothingness and occasionally gripping his red scarf tightly.

We all had lost someone or something in this war.

Our families.

Our friends.

Maybe even parts of ourselves.

And there was no turning back.

The skeleton sat quietly at the fireplace that Asgore had set up, but no warmth could comfort him through this loneliness that this cold and cruel life had brought upon him.

Now that everything had calmed down, you finally had the time to grieve.

To feel.

To realize.

You broke out into tears and sobbed heavily, sometimes even screamed to get all this pain out of your chest but it would never leave.

It felt like a knife was deeply plunged in your chest and every breath, and every cry would hurt you more from the inside.

You had lost your only family and they would never come back.

You had lost your innocence, blood staining your hands for the rest of your life.

Your life had barely started yet.

As you finally calmed down, Toriel tended to your wounds and healed your back as well as she could: "I am sorry, child but I am afraid this will leave a scar."

You didn't respond.

Tears silently streamed down your face as you watched the flickering of the fire, deep in thought.

The skeleton was just as silent, but at least he managed to stop his shaking.

Toriel's talk to him must have helped him somewhat.

You did not get a good glance at him yet, since his back was constantly turned to you but he looked rather young and small compared to the other skeletons you have seen before.

Of course, he was still taller than you but if you couldn't guess any better, you would say he was at least one or two years older than you.

It wasn't fair for both of you to go through these things.

You killed someone. You took someone's life.

And not only that, but you also took your parent's lives as well.

You couldn't do anything but watch as they disappeared into clouds of dust.

They saved you. But you couldn't save them.

It hurt to think about it.

To think about them.

But there was nothing you could do to change their fate.

"Poor child, having to go through all of this..." Toriel sighed, trying to find words.

"Your parents really loved you. They did everything they could to make you grow up happily. I am sorry for your loss. You are probably blaming yourself for their deaths, but it is not your fault. They would want you to live and be happy."

It's not what you wanted to hear at that moment. But these were the words that would help you overcome your trauma in the future.

You just needed some time.