Alec: Next song!

[Hamilton/Burr/Laurens/All women (except Eliza):]

Hey hey hey hey

[Eliza (all women):]

Oh, I do I do I do I (Hey hey hey hey)

Dooo! Hey! (Hey hey hey hey)

Oh, I do I do I do I (Hey hey hey hey)

Dooo! Boy you got me (Hey hey hey)

[Eliza and women:]

Helpless!

Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit

I'm helpless!

Down for the count, and I'm drownin' in 'em

Alex: I didn't know my eyes had that power.

Laurens: They do.

Alex: HUh?

Laurens: ;)

Alex: elkvjsdnhleoal

[Eliza:]

I have never been the type to try and grab the spotlight

We were at a revel with some rebels on a hot night

Laughin' at my sister as she's dazzling the room

Then you walked in and my heart went "Boom!"

Tryin' to catch your eye from the side of the ballroom

Everybody's dancin' and the band's top volume

[Eliza and women:]

Grind to the rhythm as we wine and dine

[Eliza (all women):]

Grab my sister and whisper, "Yo, this one's mine" (Ooh)

Alex: Did you really?

Angelica: Yes and no.

Eliza: It was a slightly better variation of that.

My sister made her way across the room to you (Ooh)

And I got nervous, thinking, "What's she gonna do?" (Ooh)

She grabs you by the arm, I'm thinkin' "I'm through" (Ooh)

Angelica: Why would I do that to you?

Then you look back at me, and suddenly I'm...

Helpless!

Oh, look at those eyes (Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit)

Oh! Yeah, I'm helpless, I know

(Down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em)

(I'm helpless!)

I'm so into you, I am so into you

(Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit)

(I'm helpless!)

I know I'm down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em

[Hamilton:]

Where are you taking me?

[Angelica:]

I'm about to change your life

Alex: Boy she did.

Phillip: *coughs loudly*

[Hamilton:]

Then by all means, lead the way

Jefferson: What if she was trying to murder you?

Madison: Thomas? Do we need to talk?

Jefferson: *weirdly seductive voice* We always need to talk my love ;)

Everyone else: Uhhhhh...

[Eliza:]

Elizabeth Schuyler

It's a pleasure to meet you

[Hamilton:]

Schuyler?

[Angelica:]

My sister

Peggy: OUR SISTER

[Eliza:]

Thank you for all your service

[Hamilton:]

If it takes fighting a war for us to meet, it will have been worth it

Phee: FUCK BOY ALERT!

Alec: FUCK BOY ALERT!

Laurens: What?

Phee: ... I have to show you guys the video after this.

Lafayette: A what?

Hercules: Maybe we should just settle down and not question it.

[Angelica:]

I'll leave you to it

[Eliza and women:]

One week later

[Eliza:]

I'm writin' a letter nightly

Now my life gets better, every letter that you write me

Laughin' at my sister, 'cause she wants to form a harem

Laurens: *whispering* I know how that feels.*

Maria: Sorry John, did you say something?

Laurens: No.

Laurens: *internally* YES.

[Angelica:]

I'm just sayin', if you really loved me, you would share him

Angelica: *blushing* NOT TRUE!

[Eliza (all women):]

Ha!

Two weeks later in the living room stressin' (stressin')

Eacker: 2 weeks? That's really fast.

Alec: Yeah. Then there's me. Who gets a guy maybe two years after being very emotionally available for him and giving up a lot for his happiness and at this point I don't even like him that much.

Phee: Ah, old timey love. Makes me wanna question life.

My father's stone-faced while you're asking for his blessin' (blessin')

I'm dying inside,

Alec: Mood.

King George: Are you alright, my only son and heir to the throne?

Alec: yeAH i'm fiNE

Maria: How come you're the heir to the throne? You guys don't even know each other!

Alec: Because I'm his son.

Maria: No you're n-

Phee: * on a couch* Let's move on, shall we?

as you wine and dine

And I'm tryin' not to cry 'cause there's nothing that your mind can't do (Ooh)

My father makes his way across the room to you (Ooh)

I panic for a second, thinking, "We're through" (Ooh)

But then he shakes your hand and says, "Be true" (Ooh)

And you turn back to me smiling, and I'm...

(Hey!)

Helpless!

(Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit)

I'm helpless, hoo

(Down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em I'm helpless!)

Yes mommy, that boy is mine

Lee: That line is actually kinda cute.

Seabury: Yeah.

Everyone: *Slightly nods*

Phee: Really? I thought it was kinda creepy.

Alec: Shush, let them have their fun. (It is kinda creepy tho)

Phee: Alright.

(Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit)

(I'm helpless!)

Helpless!

Down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em

[Hamilton:]

Eliza, I don't have a dollar to my name

An acre of land, a troop to command, a dollop of fame

Alex: And who's fault was that.

Washington: For the 1000th time. I was keeping you alive!

Alex: Hmph.

All I have's my honor, a tolerance for pain

A couple of college credits and my top-notch brain

Jefferson: I'd like to argue with-

Madison: *kisses him on the tip of the nose*

Jefferson: *blushing furiously* Ummm... er... I... continue.

Insane, your family brings out a different side of me

Peggy confides in me, Angelica tried to take a bite of me

Eliza: What?

No stress, my love for you is never in doubt

We'll get a little place in Harlem and we'll figure it out

I've been livin' without a family since I was a child

My father left, my mother died, I grew up buckwild

Burr: Same. Expect for the buck wild part.

Theo: Dang dad, you and Alex have so much in common.

Alex: *rolls eyes*

But I'll never forget my mother's face, that was real

And long as I'm alive, Eliza, swear to God

You'll never feel so...

[Hamilton (Eliza) {all women}:]

{Helpless!} (I do I do I do I do!) Eliza...

{Helpless!} (I do I do I do I do!) I've never felt so

{Helpless!} (Hey, yeah, yeah!)

{Down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em}

(Down for the count and I'm)

My life is gon' be fine 'cause Eliza's in it {Helpless!}

(I look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit)

{Helpless!}

(I'm) {Helpless!}

{Down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em}

[*wedding march plays*]

Lafayette: WHAT DID MY ACTOR SAY TO PEGGY'S ACTOR?

Phee: Dunno.

Alec: The actors of Laurens and Peggy/Maria are married in real life. ONly straight relationship I like.

Peggy and Maria: What?

Phee: NOTHING. You'll find out later!

Hercules: You best believe I was the best flower girl! *Flips non-existent hair*

King George: Oh, look at John and Angelica together! Two people, who have no chance with Hamilton!

Angelica: WHAT?

Laurens: H-how?

King George: Oh, it's quite simple. *SCREEECH*

Alec: That actually makes sense. But, NEXT TOPIC!

[All women:]

In New York you can be a new man

In New York you can be a new man

In New York you can be a new man

[Eliza:]

Helpless

Phee: So what did you guys think of the song?

Angelica: It was very cute!

Alex: Yeah, it really was a nice song.

Phillip: So that's how you met.

Peggy: YOU LEFT ME OUT ANGELICA! ELIZA'S OUR SISTER! OUR SISTER! *Incoherent noises* *Holds up a King sized Snickers bar*

Alec: NEXT SONG NEXT SONG!