Alex POV

November 18th, 1990

Im what you call, "the loser kid."to some people i know. I never really had a friend, im not popular, and im in the debate club. Which to the jocks, that means im a loser. Im smart, but i still got my flaws. I love to write and prove my point to people, Which still makes me a loser. But i don't know why that stupid word makes me feel so bad... People say it to me everday, and it makes me sick. Makes me want to just punch them right in the nose. I really don't even understand why they call me that. Maybe they think I'll take it to heart and do bad things to myself...

Well fuck them.

I hear footsteps. I close my journal and shove it under the board quickly. I grab a random book and pretend that im reading.

They open the door, and its miss mila.

"Dinner time hamilton." She coldy says and walks away leaving the door open. I flip her off while she's walking away, and i close the book. I get off the bed, and i walk to the cafeteria. The food here is awful, but im hungry as fuck right now. I see other kids walking to, and they look a hella tired.  We don't get much sleep here. We wake up at 5 just to start chores, then by 7 ish, we get ready for school.

And when ya have insomnia, your even more tired. But im use to it.

*le time skip*

I some what finish that awful dinner, which was some kind of soup, i think... And i get ready for bed. I go to the showers, and i go to the stall that's hidden. I've claimed that stall. No one can.see me, and no one gets to see my awful looking body..

I strip, and step into the shower. The water is hot, and i melt into it. I love a hot shower, i let the water run down my face, and i sigh. I wish i could just let the water wash away my life. I got nothing to really live for, i have no family, no friends, or anything.

Ok. I really need to stop thinking such deep thoughts in the shower. I literally just wasted so much water just standing there. I go to grab soap, and i didn't bring it. I groan, and turn the shower off. Fuck it. I'll just smell. I put on on my night shirt, and pants. Which is really just a large t-shirt and Pokemon pajama pants. I go into my room, and slip under the covers.

I end up staying awake for another 3 hours, then sleeping.

I dream of a better life, with a family and a dog. A nice brother maybe, and a supporting dad who truly cares about me. A mom who loves her children, and doesn't have to be a stripper just to earn money becuase that was that was the only job she could get. A stable home, which doesn't get blown away by a hurricane, and the family stays together instead of falling apart one by one. A cousin who would not end their own life just because they don't like you and feels like your an embarrassment.

I dream of a better life, where everyone is happy, instead of sad and broken.

//////\\\\\**\\\\

Sorry if this kinda rushed.