Not that I refuse to lighten up
Not that I didn't want to reach the sky
Not that I didn't want to be loved
Not that I had my dreams came true
Not that didn't had a dream
Not that I didn't fight.

I tripped over and over, I now don't feel like getting up.  Afraid that I'll fall again and there wont be someone to catch me, like always.

The pain is so much to take in, I feel numb.  At least I don't feel the pain now,  I don't want the numbness to leave my body, I can't take the pain again. Not anymore.

Shattered in tears
Shuddered in fears
Lump in my throat
Containing myself, walking  through the woods  watching every step I take,  not wanting to trip over.....