• I admit this one is mostly a filler chapter. But enjoy nonetheless •

| May |

It was morning. My Smurf was asleep and my pillow was covered in blue hairs. She shredded like a collie, but somehow her head remained a thick mob of short pixie blue hair that currently resembled Einstein's coolest updo. She was a fucking fashionista even when comatose.

Watching her sleep, I could feel a sudden mood coming on. Oh, shit, she's in trouble. A really warm and fuzzy sensation in my stomach made me want to wake her up and cover her in stinky morning kisses just because I couldn't fucking help myself. I shouldn't do it, though. I really shouldn't. I shouldn't.

- I also shouldn't hack into governments and steal confidential files, but whoops, slippery fingers, and now my mouth was slipping, too. I should maybe see a doctor about that, it sounded like a serious problem. For her. Right now, though, I had a job to do.

Rolling up to Smurf, I wrapped my arm around her waist below the duvet and buried my nose in her blue hair. It was like getting lost in the cookie monster's pubes. The fuck, brain? Humming, I gave her a squeeze and started kissing her head, going slow at first, but then more persistently when she didn't wake up right away.

– Today, I, Caleb Montrell, was going to see how many inches of a woman's comatose body I could kiss before that woman slapped your balls and started whining in her half-sleep.

Attacking her cute little head with kisses, I couldn't help but grin when I heard the first sleepy whine come from my Smurf. She started flailing around when I pulled the covers down to her shoulder, pecking at her like a bird. When I got to the crook of her neck, I blew a fucking raspberry. Why? Because why not.

"Caleb!" She shrieked when it tickled, then squirmed like crazy and tried to twist around when I captured her up against me, wrapping my legs around her and cuddling her up real good. If she thought she was escaping me having a mood, she was crazier than me, and at this point, that was really saying something. "Caleb?!"

"Morning, future wifey," I said between kisses, not at all bothering to hide the smugness in my voice. "Sleep well? Dreamt good? Wanna do a stretchie?"

I didn't stop littering her with kisses, and I knew at this point I was driving her insane in the best way possible. She kept squealing and moving around in my arms, making me laugh as she tried to wiggle out. Sorry, Smurf, but you made me love you, so now this is your problem.

"Caleeeeeb!" She finally managed to flip around in my arms, but that only resulted in my lips finding hers, sealing over them and shutting her up. My hand stroked across her cheek, swiping away her blue hair that stuck to her skin in strands. I heard her croon softly against my mouth before relaxing, letting my tongue snark out and find hers. Nothing was better than sloppy, wet, pre-toothbrush kisses in the morning.

Okay, maybe I could think of a few better things.

I finally pulled away from her lips when she was breathless and trying to steal my air. She gulped in a mouthful, then opened her eyes, those beautiful brown stubborn, yet cute ones that always seemed to reduce my IQ to below the 60's when she looked at me. When she shyly licked her lip, I could actually feel my intelligence leaving me one braincell at a time. Goodbye. Adios. We're heading south, see you in a couple of hours, broski.

Goddamn, they were gonna abandon me completely if she kept looking at me like that.

"Hey," I said like the dumbest motherfucker in the world, blank of any other thing to say. Smurf was still looking at me, and what she was thinking I couldn't goddamn tell. Maybe that I was crazy and she couldn't understand why she stayed with me. I wouldn't blame her, because that's what I was constantly thinking. How the fuck did I even land a girl like her?

"Hi," She replied, because, duh, what person didn't when their lame idiot fiancé said hello to them like they were strangers on a bed. She stared at me for another moment, but then her lip turned up in a little smile, and yup, my last braincell packed it's suitcase and vacated my brain. All hope was lost for me.

I was more whipped than a sub in a sex dungeon.

"You're in a happy mood this morning," She noted, letting me squeeze her to me again and peck her lips. I nodded against them and hummed.

"You're damn right, I am," I replied, unable to help a grin from stretching on my lips. "There's exactly two months until we get married today."

"Aw. Our two month-pre-wedding-anniversary," Smurf cooed ironically, before sighing hopelessly. "You're such a sap. Sometimes I wonder why I agreed to marry you."

"You want me to remind you?" I teased, taking her tiny hand and giving it a smug kiss.

"I wish," She murmured back tiredly, before yawning. "but we don't have time for that. Mia's picking us up in a few hours, remember?"

Damn it. I had completely forgotten about that. "I guess we'd better mosey then... you should go wake my sister up if you want her to be awake for dress shopping."

Yes. Mia was coming by to help Smurf pick out a nice dress for the big day, and of course Elana was going to have a dress as well; A flower girl dress. I might've been biased saying this, but she would probably be the cutest flower girl in the entire multi-universe.

"I guess I better," Smurf agreed, before pecking my lips a last time. She then gave a tired groan and swung her legs out of the bed and walked her fine little ass out of our bedroom to the bathroom.

– I couldn't believe I was marrying that ass.

Grinning to myself, I followed her lead and joined her in the bathroom where she was already brushing her teeth with sluggish movements. It was right then I heard my phone buzz on my nightstand, alerting me with a text. I abandoned my toothbrush and limped back to into the bedroom.

Checking my phone, a large grin spread on my lips. "Smurf! Look at what I just got from Italy."

I hurried back into the bathroom and saw Smurf perk an eyebrow. "Wha'?" She said with a mouth full of toothpaste.

I flipped my screen and showed the message I had just received from none other than Vince. The second Smurf laid eyes on the picture, she smiled so big, glob of toothpaste fell from her mouth and into the sink.

A very pregnant Rya was palming her belly with Vince taking the photo from a sideways angle. She was about 7 months pregnant, full with a very happy baby who was growing at a nice pace. Unfortunately, our wedding was a bit too close to their due-date. Rya and Vince would be absent at our wedding, but I considered them having a baby the best wedding present in the world.

"She's really glowing," Smurf said, after spitting out a mouthful of toothpaste. "And she's carrying so beautifully. They still don't wanna know if it's a boy or a girl?"

"Nope," I grinned, plopping my phone down on the side of the sink. I started grabbing my own toothbrush again, wetting the bristles under the tap. "Vince wants it to be a surprise. Either way, we know that baby is gonna know how to handle a gun before they can handle a spoon."

Smurf snorted, but then washed out her mouth and rinsed her toothbrush. "Alright. Well, I'm gonna go wake up your sister and then we're gonna be off in a few hours. What are you going to do today?"

I shrugged, shoving the toothbrush into my mouth. "I don't know... might stop by the office and check up on the big boss. Might hack some NSA stuff on aliens. We'll see."

"So just a normal day," Smurf stated. I nodded, verily.

Smurf went on to wake up my sister and I finished up brushing my teeth while thinking about how I was going to spend the day. I was still working with the big boss, intercepting kids who were in the danger zone of being targeted. Alongside planning a wedding (although Mia had sort of hijacked that—she was helping Smurf and making sure we got the perfect day after I suggested we have the reception at a waterpark), my days were more than busy enough. After what felt like ages, life was finally starting to feel normal again. Smurf was happy, Elana was doing good, and I was about to become a husband with the coolest wife on earth.

I wished mom and dad could've been here to see it all happen...

"Caleb?"

"Yeah?" I called back when I heard Smurf's voice from the living room. I got out of the bathroom and started heading towards her. "What's up?"

My heart almost did a backflip when I walked in to see my sister sitting on Smurf's lap, crying. Smurf was trying to soothe her, but tears kept streaming down her face. I immediately rushed over and crouched down with a wince.

"What happened?" I wanted to know, cupping my sister's face with one hand. What's wrong, Princess? I signed with my other.

"She had a rough morning," Smurf told, giving a sympathetic smile as Elana clutched tighter onto her and hid her face in the crook of her neck. "She, uhm... woke up to a spider right above her bed."

The heavy brick on my chest immediately fell off again. A spider? That's what got her rattled?

"Oh," I said, leaning in to press a big kiss to her curly bed head hair. "Oh, well, that's horrible. Did it scare you?" I signed to her, to which Elana nodded meekly.

"She said it was big," Smurf told, rubbing Elana's back softly. "I think you should go remove it. She won't go back in to get changed."

"Of course. Yes. I'll go do that. Right now," I said, slowly standing up. I felt my feet carry me to the edge of her room, standing in the door jamb, looking into the princess bedroom with toys scattered all over the floor and the curtains shut all the way, giving a dimmer light.

I would just go remove the spider. The big spider... The big hairy spider that was currently in my sister's room, hiding somewhere... ready to pounce at any moment...

"I'm a man. I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man." I repeated reassuringly to myself, before taking a deep breath, eyeing out her room like a battlefield.

But mom always used to handle this.

Situations like these were always so stressful. There were so many things you had to calculate. How? When? How fast? What would happen if I moved too slow? What if it was poisonous and I turned into Spider-Man? So many things could go wrong, and honestly, I didn't have time to be a friendly neighborhood hero.

Blowing out a nervous breath, I looked back at Smurf who was still comforting Elana, signing away clumsily as she pointed towards her room.

"Where did she say the spider was?" I nervously asked, seeing Smurf concentrate as she tried to read Elana's signing. She was catching on, but it still sometimes took her a while to remember it all. Which was fair.

"She saw it crawl towards her dollhouse," Smurf answered, after a moment of watching Elana sign out her answer. She brushed her hair and pecked her on top of her head. "She said it was huge with long legs."

Dang flabbit.

"Alright," I said, sounding braver than I felt. I was a man, I was a man, I was a man. "I'll get that bad boy right out of there. Don't you worry." I might piss my pants, but it'll be manly, testosterone piss. More or less.

The sight of Elana's tear-stained face was enough for me to grab a trusty cup and slice of paper, however. If the spider had scared my baby, he had to go. There was just no other way. Comfy dollhouse or not. He had to move out. Or more like get evicted.

I mean, sure, my sister smiled at Eli's resting bitch face, but got scared of a spider. That was my girl for you.

Blowing out a last breath, I marched into her room. The purple colored walls were a nice contrast to the black spider that was currently hiding somewhere in her room. The white carpets helped too, but her various teddy bears, toys and trinkets made for a dangerous landscape of hiding spots for a long-legged crawly motherfucker.

"Mr Spider-Man?" I called into her room, watching for any movement on the floors as I slowly came closer to her dollhouse—a pink one with a nice yellow roof. "Mr Spider-Sir? I need you to come out with your legs up, please. We've received some complaints from your neighbors."

"Seriously?" I heard Smurf drawl from the living room.

"Hey, I'm handling this my way!" I shouted back, before returning to the task at hand. I heard a mild scoff in the background. If she had such a problem with my way of doing things, she could come in here and do it herself.

I slowly (and painstakingly) crouched down near Elana's dollhouse and carefully looked around the edges. If he was hiding here somewhere, he was staying comfy where he was. Which he should, honestly. That doll house bed had a real tiny mattress with fluffy pillows and the bathroom had a clawfoot tub. I could see why he chose this real estate to settle down. Too bad the landlord didn't like him.

After a few more minutes of searching, I nearly let out a scream when something suddenly moved, crawling out from under the bottom of the dollhouse.

"Sir, you are trespassing!" I declared, before I quickly secured the cup over him, locking him inside his glass prison. He did have long legs, fit for a runway. "I'm sorry, my dude, but you can't be here, you're squatting here illegally. Besides, there's no hot spider ladies in here. Wouldn't you rather be outside where you can meet a nice spider lady and have some lovely spider kids? I mean, she might kill you after you're done doing the—"

"Caleb!" Smurf yelled at me, impatiently.

"Alright! Calm your tits, the situation is under control," I grumbled, before carefully sliding the paper under the cup. Lifting it up, I flipped the cup upside down and watched the spider fall into the glass, safe and secured under the paper lid. "I'm coming out with Mr Spider. Clear the hallway!"

I carefully walked out, keeping my eyes on the spider in the glass. I walked over to the window and saw Smurf roll her eyes out of the corner of my own when I awkwardly managed to unlatch the window with my little finger.

"Alright, out you go," I told, quick as a whip flipping the cup upside down and removing the paper. The spider dropped out and fell onto a bush below the window, a few stories down. "Please don't come back without a written lease, thank you!"

I shut the window and blew out a relived breath; I had survived.

"Easy peasy," I told nonchalantly, looking over at Smurf who was pressing her lips together not to grin.

"You are so ridiculous," She shook her head with a little smile, before getting up, hoisting Elana onto her hip. "Alright, we are gonna get dressed now, if there're no more spiders to delay us."

"Completely spider-free zone," I declared, gesturing towards Elana's room.

"Thanks," Smurf replied, before quickly signing the same to Elana who seemed to ease a little at the news. "We're gonna go get dressed then before Mia shows up."

"Absolutely. Give Mia my best. And by the way, happy Mother's Day!" I told, just as Smurf and Elana started walking back to her room.

Smurf stopped up while Elana continued forward, leaving Smurf frowning in the doorway with a confused expression. "Uh... thanks? I'm not a mother though, dumbass."

"I know," I grinned, walking up to her. I leaned down and pressed a kiss to her lips, lingering for just a moment longer than needed. "Just practicing for the future."

Smurf's eyes widened, and with a little gape, I laughed at her expression and lowered my lips onto hers again, pulling her tightly into my chest. She let go of a small squeal when I planted a good and long kiss on her lips, tipping her slightly over backwards, and tasting her delicious little mouth. God, I couldn't believe this woman was mine.

With a last peck, I then released a very pink-looking Smurf with swollen lips. She gave me a speechless look when I grinned silently and started walking away. I felt her stunned eyes on me all the way to the bedroom.

That's right, Smurf. You're my future baby mama, and when you're done shopping with Mia, we're gonna practice the baby-making. All. Damn. Night.

– A solid promise I vowed to keep, a promise that no doubt was going to get me through the long, tedious day.

~~~

"So nothing yet?"

The big boss sighed heavily and shook his head, throwing down his earpiece after finishing a conversation with an affiliate from AISE. "Nothing yet. They're monitoring the bratva from Russia, but they're being dormant at the moment. Too dormant for my liking."

"You think they're plotting something big?" I asked, concerned.

"I can't tell," He gritted out, frustratedly. "They've kept radio silence for weeks, not even as much as threat on my answering machine." Lord knows he was used to those. "They're staying low for the time being, and I have to be honest, it's unsettling me. If they're planning something, they're being unusually discreet about it."

From our time working with the Russians, we had learned that they loved to make a spectacle whenever they pursued something or someone they wanted. Usually in the violent fashion. But for weeks now, we hadn't heard much from them, although we still felt them skulking about in the corners, watching us.

"Maybe they're waiting for us to make a move?" I suggested, lifting a brow. "Maybe they're waiting for us to move the next chess piece before they launch whatever game they're working on us."

The big boss pressed his lips together, his eyes deep with thought. He sat quietly for a moment and weighed the options I was certain he had weighed before my mentioning it. "I don't know what they're expecting from us. The CIA was covering for C.E.N.T.U.R.I.E.S when it came to the kidnappings, but when Agent Santino and Agent Wilkins brought them down, we opened the path to track them better, but it's still not enough to take them down. Since the government is funding them, there's no authority to report them to."

"So what's the plan, then?" I asked, shifting in the expensive leather chair when my knee started to ache slightly. "If we can't take them down, how long is this going to go on?"

With a deep sigh, the boss shook his head and closed his eyes. "I don't know... I'm hoping if we continue to make life miserable enough for them, they'll eventually fuck up enough to either get shut down or simply give up on their attempts once they see I won't quit."

"And if they don't?" I questioned, although a part of me wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer.

The boss gave a faint smile. Then, sitting up straight, he pulled in a deep breath before fixing up his wrinkled suit. "That's for me to worry about. You, on the other hand, should be getting home. I reckon Zoe will be getting back any minute now."

I instantly grinned, forgetting all about our troubles at the mention of my fiancée. Maybe she had found a dress to marry me in by now. Maybe she had been wearing it all day, imagining what it would be like to become my wife in it.

"Yeah, I probably should. You'll come, won't you, boss?" I asked, offering a little crooked grin. "When it's time?"

The boss chuckled and bobbed his head. "I wouldn't miss it for the world, kid."

But the way he said it had my gut clenching, especially when his eyes looked down and got that faraway gaze. The one he always got when we got to talking about my life with Zoe. Whenever we talked about our private life.

He never talked about his own. Not since the day we struck our deal and I promised to take on the secret project. But still, sometimes, like right now, when he wasn't even aware I think, I saw the way his eyes turned hollow and momentarily disappeared from the conversation, going somewhere else in his mind.

I didn't know how he fucking did this every day. Woke up, got to work, and only worked, without...

"I want you up there by the alter with me," I told, seeing him slowly come back from his thoughts, his eyes clipping away from staring into space. He forced a stiff smile onto his lips, but I saw the strength it took for him to produce it.

"Whatever you want, Caleb. It's your day."

"It wouldn't be happening without you," I said, solemnly. God knew this man had done more for me, Zoe, Elana, Eli and even Vince and Rya than anyone else probably had. He had saved all of us right there from that office chair, and only I knew the price he was paying to do it. That's why it was important he stood up there with me when I married my Smurf.

Because without him, I wouldn't even be alive to utter the words.

"We really appreciate you, boss," I said, seeing his lips twitch faintly again, before he looked away as usual. "I mean it. You have no idea how much it means to us that you'll be there."

His smile lingered, but his eyes stayed down. Then, just as his office phone rang, he sighed and turned towards it. "Give Zoe my best."

I stood up, just as he lifted the phone off the machine, answering the manically ringing device. "Will do. Take care, boss."

"And Caleb?" I paused up at the door and saw him lower the phone to his shoulder, before sending me a quick, genuine smile I couldn't help but return. "See you up there at the alter."

• • •

Hell yeah.