You woke up, rubbing your eyes, and when you looked around, you weren't on the couch, or in the closet, or in a car, instead, you were in a bed, an actually comfortable bed.

"...Morning..." you heard a voice from the doorway, it was Ivy, and she was only wearing a white tank top. "How'd you sleep?."

"...Uhh...good..." you smiled slowly and got up, yawning softly.

"Seems you're still tired." Ivy smiled.

"Yeah...might as well get some coffee in me." You started walking to the door before Ivy pushed you down onto the bed.

"Or...we can enjoy a nice cuddle session instead of having coffee."

"But I gotta work..." you try to get up before she lays on top of you.

"Just for a few minutes..." she nuzzled her head into the crook of your neck.

You sighed but smiled and wrapped your arms around her.

"Yes mam."

"Oh shut up..." she smiled letting you wrap your arms around her. "This is nice....I haven't had anyone, you know, just hold me, nobody..." she then looked a bit sad. "Nobody has shown, like, a legitimate love for me...except for my college boyfriend but he cheated on me..."

"...I'll never cheat on you..." You kissed her cheek.

"Good..." she smiled wiley.

"...What happened to your college boyfriend?..." You asked, now curious

"You don't want the answer." She looked away.

" I actually do." you smiled, poking her. "Come on, tell me."

She moved her head to a planet that hadn't been watered in years but was somehow still alive.

"...Oh..." you looked at the plant, then quickly held Ivy tighter. "I promise I'd never harm you in any way."

She rolled her eyes playfully then pecked your nose. "You better not, otherwise, that'll be your future."

"So..." you said, trying to change the subject. "When can we tell Harley?-"

Ivy's eyes widened and her smile faded and she quickly gave you a stern look.

"We aren't." She answered

"What do you mean, why not?." You asked, looking confused.

"Because...ugh...Harley...I don't know how she'd react....if you tell her something secret it'll-"

"Spread like a wildfire?." You finished her sentence.

"I prefer if we didn't use that word..." her teeth gritted. "but yes, that and she'll make fun of me for having sex with someone who's...you know-"

"Alright." You get up. "Cuddle time is over." You start to put on your clothes.

"Hey, come, you know I didn't mean to offend you-"

"No, I get it." You put on your white shirt which had blood stains on it from your last stain. "You're embarrassed that everyone in the world will find out you are in bed with someone who's got a "short" boy, well it's average size!."

"Y/n..." Ivy went from a quiet voice to covering her mouth and slowly snickering. "I'm sorry- this is really shitty of me...but if you think it's average-"

You put on your jacket and jeans and grab your guns. "I'm going to kill someone, or get a drink...you know what, fuck it, I'm doing both, I'll be back at nine o'clock." you left her room.

Ivy's vines quickly stopped you in your path and she made you face her.

"Ugh, we need to get you some new clothes." You looked at your outfit.

"What's wrong with what I'm wearing?."

"You smell like shit, you have blood under your fingernails and you look like you haven't had a good sleep in months-"

"I've been sleeping in the closet for two months, of course, I haven't had good sleep, and I'm sorry if this is the only thing I can wear, every time I go to the store, you and Harley laugh at everything I put on."

"Hey, that's not true." Ivy folded her arms. "...I mean...that jacket looks nice on you, also, aren't you an assassin, don't all assassins have like high-tech gear and fancy weapons."

"For the twenty-eight time." You said, slowly getting pissed. "All of my shit was taken by the cops when they arrested me."

"Why didn't you have another place to store all of your guns and masks and ugly suits-"

"First, those suits were not ugly, they were awesome, and second, have you seen the prices for living these days, five and a half million dollars for a small, square box apartment in Metropolis and ten million for some underwater home in Atlantis, and Gotham's prices aren't getting any smaller than they were." 

"He has a point." King Shark was reading a book.

"What are you reading?." Ivy asked.

"Apparently there's a shark that's smart enough to write books, most of them are in second person but I'll tell you they aren't half bad." King Shark flipped the page of the book he was reading.

"What's this book about?." You asked.

"Some inventor that lives in a kingdom full of mushrooms and has a ton of women and I mean a ton, princesses, monsters, a girl with horns and can spit fire."

"Looks like I need to become an inventor." Dr. Psycho sat down on the couch opening a soda.

"Oh please, with your height you couldn't get any action." You laughed.

"I have a child, and just tell me how many women you've banged, I'm sure they all laughed when they saw your little friend."

"I've done two." you grabbed a soda from the fridge.

"...Really now?..." Ivy looked at you, her face blanked. "...mind telling us the names?."

"Sure..." you smiled before quickly thinking of fake names, you couldn't tell Ivy that you have fucked Harley, or the other way around. "...Hailey Quinton and Pamme Isay..."

That's when Harley walked in with her phone.

"Guys, I got it the perfect heist." She sat down on the couch. 

"Well, I'm all ears." King Shark continued reading. "So what is it this time?."

 "Bane, Sinestro, Grodd, I mean, even Joker." Harley went through the photos on her phone.

 "Yeah, yeah, yeah." Psycho rolled his eyes. "We know what they look like, what's your point?."

"That they've all tried and failed to steal Kord Industries' game-changing weather machine." Harley smiled, pulling up a picture of the said machine. "Which is why we are gonna do it." 

"If none of them could steal it, that seems like a pretty good indicator that we should not try." King Shark looked worried.

"But if we succeed, it will make the Legion so furious, they'll have to notice us." Harley grinned. "I sent Clayface to do some recon."

"My character was a sassy divorcee..." Clayface turned into a woman. 

"Can we please not do the unnecessary backstory thing?." Psycho asked. 

"...named Brenda..." Clayface continued. "...who is back in the dating game for the first time in a while, and she's decided to get adult braces."

"Of course she did." Psycho groaned.

"I know what you're thinking." Clayface smiled. "It's a little expensive on a secretary's salary, but no, you can't put a price on a smile."

"You can put a price on anyone." You sat down. "As long as there are two people on the planet someone will want the other person dead."

"So she threw caution to the wind--" Clayface kept going before Harley got up.

"Clayface!." Harley shouted. "Intel!."

"The machine is being protected by 1,000-ish lasers, according to head scientist Jerome Stansfield, who may or may not be heartbroken when Brenda does not show up to work tomorrow."

"How will we ever get past 1,000-ish lasers?." King Shark asked.

"Already thought of that." Harley looked over at Psycho. "Psycho?."

"S.T.A.R. Labs created a personal force field device that deflects energy." Psycho began. "Problem is, the only way to get into the room is through an air duct about four inches wide."

"I don't know how the hell we're gonna do that." You looked at the model that Clayface made.

"Simple, your dick is only two inches-" Harley giggled.

"Fuck off!." You shouted.

"Yeah, fuck off!." Ivy shouted, before her eyes widened and she looked away.

"Why are you sticking up for him?." Harley asked.

"It's nothing-" Ivy said before Frank spoke up

   "Oh, shit, Harley." Frank shouted. "The news is talking about that book you love."

"Oh, Clive Cussler's Sahara?." Harley smiled, flipping onto the couch.

A/n: Fun Fact, as someone who reads Clive Cussler, I loved this moment.

"Clive Cuss--" Ivy "No, Queen of Fables."

"Oh, that's right." Harley grinned. "She's gettin' out today."

"We are bringing you live to the courtroom where Queen of Fables is being released from her tax book prison of 30 years." A news reporter said as Zatanna used her magic to bring The Queen out of the tax book.

"Oh, yeah." Queen Of Fables smiled. "Damn, feels good to get out of those pages." She walked past Zatanna.

 "Thanks, Zatanna. Thanks, Judge, see ya." She was grabbed by two officers. "Whoa, What the... Watch the robe."

She looked at the judge.

"You said you were gonna release me!." 

"I did." The judge smirked. "From the tax code, but you're hereby sentenced to serve the remainder of your time in Arkham Asylum."

"What!?." Harley threw the remote at the tv. "That's bullshit, somebody's gotta do something."

"Why?." You asked.

"She's been stuck in that book for 30 years!." Harley looked at you before Ivy laughed.

"Yeah, 'cause she almost destroyed Gotham."

"Yeah, I think it was more of a lack of affordable housing that destroyed Gotham but, look, Fables has been a mentor to me." Harley looked down. "She just gets a bad rap."

"Look." Ivy rolled her eyes. "Obviously, I'm not pro-Arkham, but if there was any person who definitely belongs there, it would be the Queen of-- Oh, my God." Ivy stood up, Harley was already gone. "And you're gone."

"Yeah." Frank laughed. "She didn't hear any of that shit." 

"Where's Y/n?." Ivy looked around.

"Harley took short-dick with her." Psycho smiled.

Timeskip...

You and Harley were driving along the road, not stopping for any reason, she was in the passenger seat playing with a watch.

"And, why do I need to be along for this?." You asked while driving on the other side of the road, cars swerving left and right.

"Because there are guards and you will shoot them while getting Fables out of there, also do you know why Ivy stood up for you back there?."

"...Not a clue." you kept your eyes on the road, and Harley rolled her eyes.

"Yeah right, I know you're lying Y/n, I've known you for months, not nearly as long as Ivy but I can tell when you lie...so...spill it."

"Harley, I honestly don't know why she stood up for me...maybe she's also tired of hearing you all make jokes about my average size-"

Harley started laughing.

"Average!?." She wiped a tear from her eye. "Average, oh my god, you are in the wrong profession, baby, you should be a comedian."

"Shut up, and don't call me baby, we aren't a couple." You focused on the road.

"...Well, I mean...we can be..." Harley gave you a wink.

"After what you've done with Joker both violently and sexually, I don't want any part of you."

"Oh trust me, after I saw what you had going on, I was disappointed, Joker has twice the size on you." Harley smiled, she was getting under your skin, and she knew it.

"I swear Harley, I will send you to an early grave if you don't shut up."

"Aww come on, I didn't think someone was THAT insecure about such a small, droopy-"

"You know what, fuck this." You floor the gas and the car speeds down the road and since Harley wasn't buckled up, she went flying into the backseat.

"HEY!." She rubbed her head, glaring at you.

You saw the G.C.P.D car that was carrying the Queen of Fables and smirked.

"BEEP BEEP MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!." You shouted as you rammed right into the car, tipping it over and getting out of it, you took your guns out and kicked open the doors.

"Ello, ello, Queenie!." You smiled at the Queen of Fables.

"And who are you?." She asked, smirking.

"Hey Queenie...meet HeadHunter." Harley smiled, rubbing her head.

"Well, I'll be damned." Fables smiled.

"Aw, I couldn't leave you behind." Harley uncuffed her.

"Why, thank you, Harley." Fables nodded at Harley, stomping on a guy's arm which made his lighter fly up into the air, she caught it and lit a cigarette, then looked at you.

"And thank you Mr. Headhunter."

"Call me Y/n." You smirked.

"No, call him tiny-dick-" Harley laughed, and then both of the guards, you, now having enough with the jokes, cut one of the guard's heads off in a split second, making Harley jump a bit.

"Oh, I like him already." Fables smiled as you punt-kicked the head into a trash can.

"Let's ride." You looked back at the girls as you all got in the car and drove back to the mall. 

"All right, everyone." Harley smiled, twirling her bat. "I would like to introduce Queen of Fables."

Ivy's eyes widened as Fables walked in behind you, you sat down by Ivy.

"She's agreed to help us break into S.T.A.R. Labs." You nudged Ivy who looked....scared...

"So, yeah. I'm gonna need you to pull something around four inches tall out of your storybook." Harley smiled at Fables.

"Sure, but I'm not sure how Prince Charming's dіck is gonna help ya." 

"Kinda low-hanging fruit." You said.

"Oh you're just saying that because yours is shorter than his-" Psycho taunted before with an accurate throw, you threw a throwing knife at him which pinned him to the wall by his hair. "You missed me."

You growled but Ivy put her hand on yours and you slowly looked at her, she shook her head and you put the rest of your knives away, you were still pissed.

"Hey after what you did for me, you can have whatever you need, honey." Fables smiled.

"Can you enchant my size so everyone can stop making fun of me?."

Fables laughed, wiping a tear from her eyes.

"Oh I like you, you should be a comedian."

Your eye twitched as King Shark walked over to Fables.

 "So you can pull any character out of your storybook?."

"Sure can," Fables answered. "Who's your favorite?. 

"Oh, I'm partial to Humpty Dumpty." King Shark smiled as Fables turned the pages of her book and like magic, Humpty Dumpty appeared.

"Hi, everybody."

"Aw." Harley smiled.

"Oh, my God, It's him!." King Shark screamed happily.

"Oh, he's so--" He then let out a horrified scream as Fables cut Humpty's head off, revealing egg yolks.

"He makes the best eggs, Y'all got a kitchen here, right?." Fables walked off with Humpty's body as Ivy walked over to Harley, King was now crying and you patted him on the back. 

"Uh, Harley. A moment?."

The two of them walk behind one of the sections of the mall and you slowly peer your head in, hearing every word.

"What are you thinking?." Ivy shouted.

"Uh, that the only way to get the Legion of Doom's attention is that weather machine, and she's gonna help me steal it?." Harley answered.

"No, no, no, no, seriously, you do not want to get involved with this bitch." Ivy growled. "She's like a real, legit bad guy."

"Dude, we're all bad guys." Harley folded her arms. "Even Y/n, and he's an assassin-"

"Uh, first of all, I care about the environment, okay?." Ivy got in her face. "I don't know what about that makes me a bad guy."

"Says the girl who dissolved the head of ACE Chemicals in a bath of his own herbicide." Harley got in her face.

"And another thing, stop shitting on Y/n!."

"Why?. It's funny!." Harley laughed. "And why are you sticking up for him, what did you fuck him or something and ask to be his girlfriend?."

"No, of course not!." Ivy lied. "But still, if he wanted to he could cut off your head, you've worked with him in the past when you were with Joker-"

"Oh come on, he knows I'm not serious about it, plus I find it...kinda cute in a way, the way he reacts to it all just is so funny to me."

"Well I don't find it funny, and neither does he, so shut your mouth for once!."

"Fables has been teaching me the ropes of super-villainy." Harley tried getting back on track. "You were the one saying I should listen to other people."

"No, I said listen to me, okay?." Ivy gripped her shoulders. "You're a bad guy but you're a good person."

"Uh, I don't know, Ive." Harley rolled her eyes. "Bad is bad."

"Ugh, all right, let me try this again." Ivy groaned. "You're like broadcast bad, she's cable bad."

You looked over and saw Fables chopping up Humpty Dumpty then setting him on fire while scrambling his insides.

Timeskip...

You, King, Clayface, Psycho, Harley and Fables were all standing right outside of a fortress.

"Okay, Queen." Harley smiled. "You're up."

Fables turned her book and pulled out a tiny mouse.

"Aw." King Shark smiled. "He is precious, but are you sure Cinderella's mouse is up for the job?."

The mouse suddenly put on a vest, general's hat, and combat boots before smoking a cigar the same size of him and flicking it at King Shark.

"Ow."

"That answer your question?." Fables smirked at King.

"It does, but it actually brings up a lot of other questions."

"All right." Harley began walking. "We got a personal force field to steal."

As everyone was walking, you got hit in the back of the head with a ball.

"The hell?." You turned back and saw a guy grabbing the ball and running back, everyone saw a large family enjoying a nice barbecue, and having a good time. 

"Oh, shit." you slowly said.

"Welcome to the Praxis family reunion." A voice said as people began chatting, then someone pointed to all of you and was ratting you all out.  

"Damn it, that guy ratted us out." Harley groaned. "I'm calling off the mission."

"Relax." Fables got in front of her. "You do your thing, I'll keep them busy."

Harley nodded and you all headed into the base, you stopped when you heard Fables speaking.

"Who likes fairy tales?." 

You watched as several fairy tail characters were beginning to party with the Parxis, before Fables smiled and flipped through the book, out of it came the Big Bad Wolf himself, the wolf started clawing away at people, chewing up their bones and pouncing on anyone insight, getting blood and guts everywhere, children were screaming before the wolf ripped them in half, a woman's head was bitten off, a man was bitten in half, limbs went everywhere, an eye landed right in front of you and you dropped your guns...never in your life have seen something this brutal, even with the Joker, you now fully understood what Ivy was talking about and why she was trapped in the tax book thirty years ago.

"We did it!." Clayface shouted, running out of the tunnel. 

"Fables, let's go!." Harley smiled. "We pulled off the caper without a-- " 

They all stopped dead in their tracks once they saw you were standing at the entrance, looking horrified, there was blood all over your clothes, your jacket, shirt, and jeans, ruined.

"Y/n, what's wrong?." Harley walked over and screamed once she saw the carnage that was left, Fables was sitting on a bench, smoking, and the wolf was liking a bone.

"This is horrifying!." King Shark yelled.

"I won't be needing these anymore." Clayface threw his eyes away.

"What did you do?." Harley slowly looked at Fables.

"I didn't do anything." Fables looked at the wolf. "All credit goes to the Big Bad Wolf here."

"But why?." Harley asked.

"You were there." Fables shrugged. "That guy ratted us out, so I killed that guy, then everyone saw me kill that guy, so I killed everyone, you gotta end the bloodline and prevent any revenge killing, I mean, that's just Evil 101."

"Uh, I taught that class at Boston College, and we never covered anything this fսckеd up." Psycho said.

"All right, guys." Fables got up. "Come on, take a look around, make sure I got everyone, make sure they're all dead."

You and Harley saw someone hiding under a bunch and both of you looked at each other.

"Uh, yup." Harley said. "You killed the shit out of everyone."

"All right." Fables smiled. "Let me grab the Three Little Pigs to clean this mess up."

 "Oh, they are cu--Oh, Jesus." Harley started to say before the pigs began eating the corpses.

"There we go." Fables smiled. "Go get 'em, boys."

King Shark fainted as you watched on in horror 

"Come on, the bones, too," Fables shouted. "Come on, the bones."

Timeskip...

"You know, no one ever talks about it but it's almost impossible to get brain out of a cape." Fables smiled as you were all back in the mall.

"Did she do the pig thing or..." Ivy began before King Shark vomited into a trash can. 

"That's a yes." She then looked over at Harley. "So... You think I was right to be worried?."  

"Yes." Harley nodded. "Oh, my God, Ivy, you were way right, she is... a lot."

"And so now you're gonna tell her that it's... Over." Ivy said.

"Yes." Harley nodded. "I'll tell her, we'll just go back to being friends that do not work together."

"Boy, that was some fun shit, Harley, huh." Fables smiled. "And guess what, I decided to stick around a little while longer, help you get that weather machine."

"Oh, that's too generous." Harley nervously chuckled. "I don't wanna put you out."

"Nonsense." Fables smiled. "This is fun, I feel like I'm gettin' my groove back."

"Groove, huh?..." you slowly spoke now just walking into the mall, your face was pale.

"Y/n?." Ivy ran over to you. "...Hey...are you okay?..."

"Oh, and if you liked the pigs, wait till you see the three blind mice eat a body." Fables continued to smile. 

"The mice eat bodies, too?." You asked, nearly fainting.

"Oh, my God." Fables chuckled. "Those little bastards can just gnaw the shit out of a head, It takes longer 'cause they got those little, you know, mice teeth, the best!."

"Wow." Ivy sarcastically grinned. "Now, that's fun, Harley, right? That's the kind of stuff you've got ahead of ya."

Harley took a deep breath and walked up to Fables.

"Hey, uh, Fables?." Harley smiled.  "We need to talk."

"Hey, everybody." Fables checked her cape. "Check your shoes, someone stepped in eye...What's up?." She looked at Harley.

"You know, I appreciate how much of a badass you are, I mean, listen, I consider you a friend and a mentor, and just a real-" Harley spoke before Fables cut her off.

"-- You know what'd be great If you said what you actually mean."

"I just... I think maybe you should sit out the weather machine heist, your style, it's just a little... intense."

"Oh." Fables rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry, I thought the point was to get the job done."

"Yeah, but not by murdering innocent people, I mean, it's just a line I won't cross." Harley frowned.

"Oh, you got a line, huh?." Fables glared before looking over at the rest of you. "Hey, guys, she has a line."

You were slowly helped to the couch by Ivy who looked really concerned.

"Do you need anything?..." She asked worryingly.

"Superheroes have a line." Fables glared at Harley. "Teen Titans have a line, We don't give a fuck."

"Yeah, you know." Harley rubbed her arm. "I think maybe I just give, like, a microscopic fuck."

"Well, the Legion of Doom gives zero fuck." Fables growled. "And if you wanna get in there, you better start pole vaulting over those lines you don't wanna cross."

"Is that from Mamma Mia?." Clayface asked.

"Thank you for your counsel." Harley frowned. "But I believe this is where we must part ways, I hope we can remain friends."

Fables clenched her fist and began turning pages in her storybook, you held Ivy tightly, wanting to protect her from the harm that would ensue.

"Am I the only one whose asshole's puckering?." Psycho asked.

"I think I clayed myself." Clayface backed up.

"Okay." Fables glared at Harley. "I'll be on my merry way...But you're makin' a big mistake."

She then turned to the fountain in the mall.

"Rapunzel, Rumpelstiltskin, let's go tear some shit up." She grabbed two birds from her book which flew her away by her cape, she gave you all the double middle finger.

"Deuces."

Timeskip...

Harley, King, Clayface, and Psycho had left to go get the Machine, using the forcefield watch they got from the first heist before Fables did her thing...Ivy insisted that you stay at the mall, which raised suspicion from Harley but left with her crew to get the machine, you were laying on the couch.

"You want to tell me what you saw?." She pulled up a chair as you were lying on the couch.

"...I know I kill people for money...but what she did...was downright....barbaric...she didn't even blink as all the blood was being splattered...men and women I can kill but children.....I draw the line there....they are young, they don't know what's right and what's fucked up...and she killed them first...I watched the whole damn thing happen..." You took out a cigarette and lit it in front of Ivy.

"Y/n, what did I say about-" She frowned before she saw your face...like you didn't care...like you felt...almost depressed in a way...

"Y/n..." She tapped your shoulder, but you continued staring at the ground.

Ivy sighed and walked over to the kitchen, she quickly made a cup of tea but pulled out a test tube from a drawer, the liquid was pink, she slowly put a few drops into the tea and walked over to you.

"...why don't you have some tea and dry to forget all about what happened..."

"...I can't forget a face, Ivy, it's my gift...and my curse...once I see a face I can't forget it, and I saw all of their faces before they were brutally murdered." You slowly sip the tea, and after a few seconds, you look at Ivy.

"This is good." you say before you slowly start kissing her, then you feel as if time has slowed down, you look at your hands, and your movements have become slower. "...What...was in that tea?."

"You're fine babe..just relax." Ivy's voice was deeper, she slowly took your hand and led you up on one of the escalators. "I'm helping you...you'll thank me later."

"Ivy...what are you doing?..." your voice sounded more like Bane...if he was drugged.

"Helping you forget, hun...just relax okay." she slowly pushed you onto her bed and removed her jacket.

Timeskip...oh yeah, before I forget....🍋

You woke up next to Ivy again, she gave you a warm smile.

"Hey..." she slowly kissed your cheek.

"Hey." You smiled back, rubbing your eyes.

"Tell me, do you remember?."

"Remember what?..." you looked confused, she slowly smiled and pecked you on the lips.

"Nothing important."

"WE GOT IT!!!!!." Harley smiled brightly. "Hey, look at that, the Mayor upgraded us from nuisance to "scourge""

"That's a big jump." King Shark smiled, you and Ivy quickly put on your clothes and walked outside, to your horror, you both saw Fables sitting on the couch, the big bad wolf next to her, licking its lips.

All the memories come flooding back into your mind.

"That's what happens when ya steal the unstealable." Harley danced before seeing Fables. "oh...shit..."

"Thanks for doing that, by the way." Fables got up, smiling. "I'll be taking that weather machine now."

"Hey, Mayor, I'll call ya back." Harley hung up her phone.

"You fucked up, Harley." Fables clenched her fist.

"Y'know, I do a lot of that, so you're gonna have to be more specific," Harley answered.

"You pissed me off and then let me walk away in one piece?." She chuckled. "Rookie mistake, right, Big Bad?."

The wolf growled.

"I can't believe you're doing this." Harley glared. "I broke you out of Arkham, I even helped ya sign up for Tinder so ya can get your fuck on, I mean, we're friends!."

"Sometimes doing whatever it takes means fucking over your friends," Fables smirked. "Hand over that weather machine."

"Over my dead body."

"All right." Fables grabbed her book. "How you wanna go, Little Bo Peep could beat the sh*t outta ya with her shepherd's stick, Just tell me if you want casket open or closed."

Out of nowhere someone flew into the mall and sent a shockwave that launched you all back.

"What the hell kinda fairy tale is he from?." Harley asked.

"Well, from the looks of him, one of those Danish ones that's super racist." You got in cover, protecting Ivy.

"He's not with me." Fables flipped through her book before the mysterious man zapped it out of her hands, burning it, the big bad wolf disappeared back into the book

"Um, anyone have another magical storybook?." she asked. "shit, I mean, is there a B. Dalton or a Waldenbooks in this fuck?."

"Who the hell are you?." Harley asked the man.

"I am Jason Praxis."

"Who?." Everyone asked.

"Last surviving member of the 25th Annual Praxis Family Reunion and Jamboree."

"Who?." Fables began to ask again.

"You murdered all of my family!." Jason shouted.

"Oh, shit...." All of you said.

"Yeah, I did that." Fables looked up at Jason.

"I thought you ended the bloodline?." King looked at Fables.

"I didn't leave anyone alive," Fables growled. "Did you see anyone alive?."

"Eh..." Harley gulped.

""Eh"? What is "Eh"?" Fables glared.

"I saw someone alive..." you said, a cold gaze was at Fables as you said this.

"What?." Fables growled. "How long have you been sittin' on this little nugget of information?."

"It was nothin'. It was just a little girl..." Harley spoke quietly. "With like a blonde... ponytail...Oh, shit."

"And that's why you always end the what?." Fables looked at all of you, wanting you all to answer her.

"The bloodline." You all said.

"The fucking bloodline." Fables nodded. "Yes!."

"My family was close." Jason began speaking. Not Appalachian hillbilly close, but we leaned on each other, we made each other laugh, and that all changed when you showed up, my brothers gone,  aunts, uncles, gone. my cousin twice removed, completely removed, I was so distraught, I threw myself against the electrified fence at S.T.A.R. Labs, but instead of k*lling me, it..."

"Gave him powers." Fables groaned.

"It gave me powers!." Jason growled.

"Every goddamn time. And now he wants to--"

"I seek revenge!." Jason growled again.

"Is there anythin' we can do to make this right?." You asked.

"Not unless you can bring my family back from the dead." Jason answered.

"Hang on," Harley said. "Lemme check."

She then looked at her crew. "Anyone?."

Everyone shook their heads.

"Yeah, no, we can't do that." Harley chuckled nervously. "Your second choice?."

"kill all of you!." Jason shouted, shooting a blast of electricity at you, Psycho shouted and created a forcefield, protecting you all.

"Ooh, I didn't even know he could do that." King Shark smiled.

"I should tell you I woke up this morning with a post-nasal thing, drank a lot of cough syrup and I can't hold this much longer."

"Is there a third choice, Mr. Praxis?." You asked.

"Hand over Queen of Fables and the rest of you can live." Jason stopped.

"All right," Fables said. "Let's come up with a plan here."

"Already got one." Harley grabbed Fables.

"Hey, what the--"

"I'm comin' out with the Queen." Harley smiled.  "She's all yours!."

"I'm gonna send your ass to the happily never after, Fables!." Jason slimed.

Clayface laughed.

"Seriously?." You looked at him. "You liked that?."

"Indeed." Clayface smiled "Terse, Lucid, Organically wove the theme of his target into the barb, a triumph!."

"I'm gonna get some more cough syrup." Psycho got up and walked away.

"C'mon, Harley, you don't have it in you to do this." Fables struggled. "You have a "line," remember?."

"Yeah." Harley smiled. "That's what I used to think, too."

"For House... Praxis!." Jason fired a ball of electricity at Fables, but, it bounced off of her and hit himself, knocking him out.

"'Ey, guess what?." Harley smirked taking off a watch off Fables. "You're not dead, force field, baby, I slipped it on your wrist."

"Damn." Fables groaned. You set me up, you tricky bitch."

"I would never send a friend to her death, even one that tried to screw me over." Harley smiled.

"So, you're just gonna let me go?." Fables look confused.

"Yeah." Harley nodded. "I got the weather machine, I won and I did it my way, I'm a bad guy, not a bad person."

"You're a dumb person." Fables laughed. "You're gonna regret letting me walk out of here alive, Quinn."

"Don't forget your little book." You tossed the book at Fables and it hit her in the head.

You all heard groaning as Jason got up again.

"D-Did I vanquish her?." He asked. "Please, tell me I avenged my family?."

"Uh, yeah?..." Harley slowly nodded.

"Thank God." He smiled. "I can finally start..."

That's when Fables drove her scepter into Jason's head, making it come out of the front of his mouth from the back of his head.

"Fables!." Harley shouted. "Why!?."

"Oh, my goodness." Fables laughed. "Can you believe, with all that ending-the-bloodline talk, I almost forgot this guy?."

Jason's body was shoved away by Fables who walked past everyone.

"All right, now I'm going."

"So what did I miss?." Psycho walked back and saw Jason's corpse. "Oh, my God! A lot, I guess."

Timeskip...

You were all sitting down at a table trying to figure out how to get the weather machine to work.

"Try "NeilPatrickHarris1." Clayface suggested.

"Clayface, is that your personal password?." Psycho grinned.

"No." 

"Well, it doesn't work anyway." You said as the red beeping noise was heard.

"So, lemme just get this straight." Ivy face-palmed. "You went through two heists, sacrificed a family and that weird electric guy just to steal an unstealable weather machine, but didn't realize that you needed a password?."

"Ooh, unstealable!." Harley smiled. "Try that."

King Shark typed it in and a red X came up.

"Too many failed login attempts...Initiating self-destruct." a voice said

You tossed the machine as far as you could and it exploded.

"Well, shit." Harley angrily stomped her foot.