"You miss it, don't you?" Mila's hand glided across his, giving him a firm squeeze. 

Kozik tore his glance away from the skateboarding couple and turned his glance to the left. Unintentionally, he reached for the stump below his knee. 

"Yeah," he admitted in a sigh. "I used to skate a lot, although the last time is years ago. The last time I called Shane, right before we went into that minefield, we decided to go skate together once I was home again. Even minutes before my leg was blown up, we were joking about breaking legs." He bit the inside of his lip. "It's ironic that my leg was blown up just a moment later."

Mila was silent for a while. Her fingertips slightly brushed the back of his hand. "You rather want to go somewhere else?"

Kozik shook his head. It had been his idea to go to the skate park that was close to their hotel. "Nah, I enjoy watching Juice falling flat on his face the whole time. He really is a total computer nerd, bet he thought playing Tony Hawk is the same as doin' the actual thing."

Mila chuckled softly. 

With a slight smirk, Kozik aimed his glance forward again. Juice really sucked at it. He however didn't give up and didn't feel ashamed of the many times he fell, and he enjoyed watching the two love birds spending some time together, without feeling the pressure of the club. Even the age gap of thirteen years seemed to disappear, as if Juice had just graduated high school as well. 

"Watching him like this makes me wonder if he really should patch in," Kozik mused. 

Mila cocked her head to the side, her eyebrows slightly frowned. "Why's that?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "Just watch them, they're like two lovesick puppies. He's so young... He should enjoy his young years and come back after ten year. I don't think I've ever seen him laugh before."

And it wasn't his laughter that was new... He had never seen Juice and Shane holding hands, but now and then their fingers laced when Shane was helping him to keep his balance. Although he had never expected Juice to be with a guy, the sight of the two just seemed right, and even though he usually didn't exactly enjoy watching two kissing men, there was something sweet about the way Juice's lips touched Shane's. 

"I don't think it's because of the club, he neither laughed a lot before that," Mila said. "Which isn't strange, considering everything he went through."

Kozik nodded slowly, he remembered what Shane had told him: that his father had died in a car crash, his mother had killed herself and that his younger brother had been shot in the streets. It was a miracle the boy was able to smile at all. He admired the boy for his strength, unconsciously he had been a good motivator since the moment he lost his leg. "He never told me anything about his older brother."

Yesterday Jaeden and Shane had spent some time together, and the boy had looked less tense than the first time they had seen each other. 

"Jaeden was never home," Mila said after a while. "He's in the army; he returned home two weeks ago and has a half year off now. Shane blames him for never being there for him, leaving him all alone. I think it was Jaeden's only way to deal with his own loss, and that losing his job would feel like he had lost everything. Shane stayed behind on his own and at some point he cut all ties with his brother." She paused for a moment. "But Jaeden's trying to make things up now, and Shane also realizes that he's his only family."

"Does he feels like family to you too?"

He knew Mila considered Shane as her little brother, but Mila and Jaeden were probably closer in age. 

"I was always closer with Shane," she shrugged. "But we could always get along well."

A silence fell as they watched the two young men. Mila's grasp tightened around his hand and she looked up to him. 

"Shall we go back to the hotel? I have a feeling the two are still holding back because of us." Her eyes were shining as she planted a small kis on his lips. "And I actually am in the mood for a little bit of you without having to hold back."

Kozik smirked as he caressed her cheek. "Well, not sayin' no that..." he winked. 

"Thought so," she laughed, getting on her feet and grabbing the handlebars of his wheelchair. 

He felt remarkably satisfied as she wheeled him back to the hotel. Two days ago they had sex for the first time. Something he had dreaded, since he was quite limited in his abilities. She however had been very sweet and tender, imperceptibly giving his confidence a boost and somewhere during their nocturnal caresses he had realized he loved her, and that she loved him. Despite the fact that he was jobless, and couldn't walk or ride anymore. Instead of letting his handicap scare her away, she kept telling him this wasn't permanent. That he would get a prothesis, that he could ride again and maybe he could even get back to work in the garage. And now, after the conversations with the orthopedic technicus, he finally had faith in the future again; a future in which he wouldn't have to stand on the sideline the whole time. 

. . .

Kozik tried to hold on to that positive energy once he was back in Charming. In the first weeks he could, until he noticed that his roommate was becoming more and more quiet. As open as Shane had been in the beginning; right now he only shrugged his shoulders when Kozik asked him what was going on. Now and then he completely lost his mind because Kozik had forgotten to tidy up something, or had done something else which annoyed him. He talked about it with both Mila and Juice, but the look in their eyes told him the prospect didn't talk to them either. He was worried, especially when he noticed that the other two were worried to. Had it something to do with his brother? Kozik hadn't heard from the guy since they'd returned to California. Did Shane believe Jaeden had made him empty promises when he told him he wanted to fix their relationship? He couldn't see why Shane wouldn't want to tell someone about it, but then again; he had hidden the existence of his brother for months. Not even Juice had known about it. Maybe he didn't know any better than keeping his hurt feelings to himself, trying to ignore them – which resulted in these rages.

It was a Wednesday night when the boy suddenly started to scream, around 8. Right after that, Kozik heard the scattering of glass. With a nasty feeling in his stomach Kozik got up, grabbed his crutches and limped towards the noise. Had someone intruded their apartment? Had Shane known about some threat without being able to tell them? 

In the kitchen he searched for a knife which he put away clumsily in his pocket while limping further through the house. The noise was coming from the bathroom; things were thrown around, and he thought to hear sobs between the screams. 

"Shane?" he asked alarmed. Leaning on his crutches he banged on the door. "Shane open up!"

No answer came. 

Was he having a seizure? Was he in a fight? Things were still falling on the ground. With the knife he fidgeted with the lock until he could open the door. 

Shane was alone. His hands were leaning on the washbasin that was drenched in blood. Wounds covered his knuckles, there were even shards of glass glistening in the flesh. A large part of the mirror had dropped down, and the floor was covered in broken vials – it felt like Shane had thrown everything around what his hands could find. 

Kozik cursed. "What the hell's going on?"

As if the boy noticed him only by now, he snapped his head to the side. His eyes were red and puffy, tears shining on his cheeks. 

"Go away." His voice was just a whisper, but a second later he screamed: "GO AWAY!!"

"Like hell I leave! Come here kid, there's blood everywhere."

Carefully he shuffled towards the boy, his glance aimed at the ground to make sure he wouldn't fall. 

Shane however pushed him back. "Go away Kozik! I fucking mean it, get the hell outta here!"

Kozik lost his balance, grabbed the towel rack before he hit the ground and glared at the other. "Don't touch me."

The prospect snorted, there was still a bestial look in his eyes. 

While Kozik stood up straight, his glance wandered across the small room. The blood on the mirror, the pits in the tiles where Shane had thrown things at, the contents of the bottles dripping down the walls... He really had no idea what had gotten into the guy. 

Suddenly, his eyes lingered on a white stick that was lying on the ground. His eyes grew wide, and in complete bewilderment he looked up to the prospect. 

It was a pregnancy test. 

A positive one.