Hi all! In The Netherlands, we celebrate two days of Christmas, so I decided to do a little Christmas chapter today. It's a flashback of Alex, I hope you all like it. :) 

Also a note about the timeline; I had a hard time figuring out the SOA timeline and it's going to be a little different. Even though season 7 originally took place in 2014, season 4 is now taking place in 2017, otherwise, it is going to conflict with Alex's background. In 2017 Alex is 27 years old and she was 5 years older than her brother (I might have said differently in the past chapters; I'm going to correct that). To refresh your memory; it's approximately 1 year and 10 months since Kip died, and Alex is now working at the garage for 8 months and she's a prospect for 2 months. Hope that's clear now. :) 

Flashback - Day after Christmas, 2015

Alex hated Christmas. It called up old memories about the time when Kip and she tiptoed down the stairs in the middle of the night and carefully removed the tape from the presents underneath the tree, to catch a glimpse of the contents. Usually, she was the one picking the tape while Kip stood down the stairs, standing on guard. He had always been her partner in crime, no matter their young age.

Those were memories she cherished – but they had stopped all too soon. The Christmas of 2000 was the last one they'd celebrated with the four of them. She had been ten years old, Kip five. Since then, things have never been the same. There had always been an empty chair around the table, and later even two. Yesterday she had even been all by herself. That however was partially her own fault; Mila had invited her to celebrate Christmas with her family and Kip had also wanted to take her to his new friends. But Alex didn't want her sadness to ruin Christmas for the others. Mila's family only reminded her of what she was missing and she didn't want to celebrate Christmas with some bikers she didn't know. Furthermore, she just got home from a long journey and even though the others liked to join their families, Alex needed some time to move past all the things that had happened during her last mission.

Now – the day after Christmas – they still had a little Christmas party together. Alex had just let her brother in, giving him a big, squeezing hug. He was looking good – there was a wide smile on his face, even though she could see he hadn't slept much last night

"You look like you had a great party last night," she told him, walking to the kitchen to grab some beers.

A moment later they flopped on the couch, taking a sip of a cold drink.

"Yeah, it was awesome. Although it can never beat a traditional evening of watching Gremlins with my sister. But you should have been there, Lex. They were really curious about you."

"You told 'em about me?"

"Yeah, of course. I'm already avoiding all questions about mom and dad, I can't pretend that I don't have a sister as well. I told 'em you were right back from a mission, that made them even more curious."

"I really hope you haven't flashed a picture of me?"

Kip chuckled, taking another swig. "No man. I can see some of them snatchin' it out of my hand and jerkin' off while looking at it."

Alex wrinkled her nose. However, most of the time she was surrounded by men, and some of them didn't rise above this level, so she wasn't really shocked. "You like it there?"

Kip nodded. "Yeah. Get all the scut, but it feels like home around 'em." He stayed silent for a while, picking on the label on the bottle. "Think you would like 'em too." He looked up.

Alex saw the hopeful glance in his eyes and swallowed. She knew he was missing her, that he wanted her to move to Charming too. But the thought alone already made her feel restless. She loved the adrenaline that took the lead when she was on a mission, she craved for that rush that made her forget about everything else. She had found a family within the military, just like Kip had found one in the Sons of Anarchy.

At least outside the holidays, she thought sighing, now her buddies had gone back to their real families while she realized she had no one but Kip.

"Cherry wants to meet you too."

Alex pulled up the corner of her mouth. "Thought you would bring her along today. You're pretty serious about her, aren't you?"

Kip shrugged his shoulders. "She was around yesterday. I didn't know if you would appreciate it. You know, with Oliver..."

Alex laughed. "We broke up four years ago. I'm over it by now."

He chuckled. "Yeah, wanna keep it that way. I thought you might start missing him or somethin', if you saw Cherry and me together. And I never want to see that knucklehead ever again. Man, never met such a great prune."

Alex bumped her shoulder against his and smirked. "I know you weren't a big fan of him, but he was kinda cute. By the way, he sent me a Christmas gift this year. I think that he doesn't dare to come around anymore since you chased him away last year." She pointed to the package at the dinner table. "Gotta be some fancy jewelry in it, maybe Cherry will like it."

Kip stood up, walked to the table and dropped down on the couch by it. "He's a real idiot for believing to win your heart back by sending you Christmas presents after four years."

"Don't forget about the birthday presents. Hell, he even still sends me flowers on our anniversary date."

"And you don't think that's creepy?" Kip asked with raised eyebrows, his attention still aimed at the cardboard he tried to rip open.

Alex shrugged her shoulders. "Nah, sometimes it's good to know some people still care about me." She stuck out her tongue as her brother turned his head to the side, a worried look in his eyes. "I'm just kidding. Don't worry, I'm fine."

"Wouldn't you want to start datin' again?"

"Nobody wants a girl who's out of the country for half of the year, and especially not a one who's carrying a gun."

"I know some guys who would find that with the gun a turn-on."

"I'm not going to date your new brothers."

Chuckling, Kip opened the package. He took two small boxes out of it and tore the added postcard in pieces without looking at the text. "You sure? You might miss out on the love of your life." He pulled off the wrapping paper and opened a jewelry box. There was a silver ring in it, wrapped with gold thread and a big diamond on top of it.

Alex shook her head at the sight of it. She'd expected more from Oliver; she would never ever wear that.

Kip whistled. "Damn, Cherry is gonna love this. She loves bling bling."

"She'll think you're proposing to her if you give her that." Alex pulled the other box out of his hands and opened it. She saw a necklace, with a silver pendant in the form of a dragonfly, inlaid with purple gems. With a snort, she closed the box and dropped it in Kip's lap. "Give her this first."

Alex put a cushion behind her back, turned to the side and placed her feet in her brother's lap. "Now, tell me about the Sons? What kind of shitty things do they make you do?"

. . .

More than once tears of laughter ran down her cheeks. Those bikers really sounded like a bunch of idiots while Kip told her how he had sawed a deer in half to get it out of a windshield, how he had stolen an ambulance and how he had to dig up a body. It felt like he was talking about some little boys with raging hormones who did nothing but create mayhem. The love he felt for those people radiated from his face as he told her how they had dumped one of his brothers in front of a police station with only a diaper on after he had passed out while taking drugs, and how another of his brothers had been bitten in the ass after his friend accidentally gave meth to a guard dog. However, not all stories were so merry. Kip also told her about the premature baby of the VP who had been on the verge of death the first weeks, and about one of the old ladies who had been murdered. Heavy things caused a lump into her throat, but those were also reasons the group was so closely connected, it felt like a family. Deep down Alex felt the longing of becoming part of this group bubbling up. Quickly she shoved the feeling away, knowing she would never fit in as her brother did. She was a girl. She would never become 'one of the guys'.

. . .

"What fancy Christmas meal do you want to cook?" Kip asked when they were caught up with each other's lives again.

"That a hint that you're hungry?"

"Uh-uh."

Alex stood up and walked to the fridge. "Well, since you don't eat meat anymore I had to skip the rabbit and turkey, but there was a wave of inspiration this morning." She took out two pizza crusts in the form of Christmas trees and placed them on the countertop. "I might not have a real Christmas tree, but now we can decorate a tree nonetheless." She took some ingredients out of the fridge and mentioned Kip to come over.

In the minutes that followed they decorated the pizza with ornaments made of tomato, olive, pepper and slices of salami for Alex, and they drew streamers with sauce. From the corner of her eyes, she watched Kip, who had completely lost himself in decorating as if he was still a little child, and she smiled, touched. She missed those moments that had become scarcer over the years. As happy as she was with the fact he had found a surrogate family, she hoped that they wouldn't replace her.

In a sudden moment of sentimentality, she wrapped an arm around his shoulders and kissed his jaw. "I love you, little brother."

He looked aside and smiled. "I love you too, sis."