I need to unsee what I just saw. I need to unhear what I just heard. I for damn sure need to unsee what the hell I saw. That. Was. HORRIBLE!!!! My dad! Having sex! IN HIS CLOSET!?!?!? WHAT. THE. HELL! I mean damn! I get that a man has needs too but seriously?!?!?!? IN HIS CLOSET!?!?!? I hug my dad when he wears that stuff!!!! Who know what type of......fluids could be staining that stuff!!!!! Ugh!!!! I need to Purell my brain and soak my eyes in battery acid!!!! And he was worried out me having condoms in my room. That sly dog! I bet he was using them! Using MY condoms that I GOT from school! He could have just asked me if he could have them anyway! Not like I was gonna use them anytime soon but still! They were mine! What am I saying! This is dumb! I'm worried about condoms when the more important issue is my dad screwing around in his closet! I'm gonna go back and give him a piece of my mind! And he better be fully dressed! What kind of operation does he think he's running?!?!? After my self rant in the atrium of the lobby I marched myself back upstairs to my dad's bedroom door and banged furiously on it.

  "This man must think I'm slow! How dare you ruin my plans to hook you up with a good woman only to sleep with some floozy!" I huffed as I waited for him to grant me access to his room.

  "Who is it?" I heard him say from the other side.

  "Your disgusted and disgruntled daughter! Let me in!" I shouted angrily.

  "Come in Carlyn." He said with an annoyed tone.

Ya ain't gotta tell me twice sir! I burst through the double doors and slammed them closed behind me.

  "Oh good you're fully dressed! Sit down and shut up!" I snapped.

  "Who you think you talkin' to Carlyn?" Daddy hissed at me.

  "You Mr. Getcha freak on! What the hell dad!?!?!" I hissed back.

My dad sat down on the side of his bed and he wasn't happy with me confronting his personal life.

  "Carlyn I'm an adult and what I do is none of your business! You can't tell me-"

I didn't care what he had to say because I was just that mad.

  "No dad you're not thinking like an adult right now! You are having sex when one YOU ARE A HARDCORE WITNESS AND YOU'RE NOT MARRIED. Two YOUR SLEEPING AROUND WITH ANOTHER WOMAN WHEN YOU HAVE A GOOD WOMAN IN YOUR HOUSE SOMEWHERE! And finally three THOSE CONDOMS WERE MINE!"

  "Carlyn what-"

  "Don't you what me Mr. Fancy pants! If I was old enough I'd slap the Purple Rain outta YOUR for being so.......STUPID!!!!"

My dad looked like he was ready to fight me after calling him stupid but I felt like that was a well suited word for him.

  "What are you trying to tell me Carlyn?" He asked confused.

I let out a frustrated sigh as I looked at him.

  "Dude! Are you freaking kidding! I saw you! You were sleeping with another woman! Does Regan know about this?!?!?!"

How quickly did I forget that the woman that he was getting it on with in his closet was in fact Regan. My anger was that strong that I forgot that she was the floozy. She walked out of the bathroom with a nervous smile on her face.

  "He.....hey......Carly! Ho.....how ya doing?" She asked me.

My soul can't take this anymore. Now I have to ask the question that I demand an answer to.

"So are y'all getting married or not then because the way y'all were going in there like a pair of rabbits in heat I'd say yes!" I said quickly.

My dad and Regan looked at each other very confused.

  "Sweetie......we were just....." Regan said but I didn't let her finish.

  "Don't give me some crap excuse that y'all were wrestling when ya clothes fell off! That ain't what happened. Y'all love each other and wanted to satisfy each other's needs. Honestly I hope you did a good job because daddy really needed to take the edge off. He's been a little angry lately."

  "Carlyn!" My dad shouted at me embarrassed.

  "What you were! You almost cussed tony out five times this week and you don't cuss!" I replied.

His caramel face went bright pink as Regan looked over at him with a smile as she crossed her arms.

  "Really now? Prince Nelson almost had to put into his own swear jar? The old you must have been dying to come out long before I got here! I think I was missed!" Regan said proudly.

My dad was over me grilling him and stood up from the bed.

  "Alright that's enough. Carlyn you know that what I do in my private time is my business. What's gotten you so hopped up on me and Regan? You've been interested in that part of my life since the day I showed you the photo album."

  "Because dad she makes you happy and I know deep down inside you know it too. Just get married and smile again. Please? Nothing would make me and Joey happier than to have a mom around the house. Don't you want that dad? Don't you want a wife? To have and to hold and all that jazz?"

Regan looked over at my dad and waited for his response. He came up to me and patted me on the head.

  "We'll talk more about this later. For now......let me.....talk to Regan." He said.

  "Ya sure you'll be talking and not.....doing?" I joked.

  "Go get ready for dinner kid." He said smiling and shoving me out of the room.

  "But dad I......" was all I could say before he waved me off and closed the door.

  "No sex before marriage dad!" I yelled at the door hoping he heard me.

My sixteen year old brain can't handle this. I went back to my room to change for dinner while Joey was still asleep. Thank god he doesn't know anything about this right. I just want to get through this dinner without further complication. Once I was dressed and ready I let Joey sleep a little longer and made my way downstairs to the dining room and took my seat at the table. I sat anxiously at the table tapping my spoon against the hard wood.

  "This is maddening." I huffed to myself.

I was ready to go back to my room when I heard footsteps approaching. In walked Regan dressed in a skin tight dark blue dress and black heels. Her curly hair bounced as she walked. My mouth dropped to the floor as I looked at her.

  "You better get your man Regan!" I exclaimed as she smiled back at me.

She sat down at the table and we both waited for my dad together. The awkwardness in the room was growing. We both wanted to talk about what had happened but neither of us knew where to start. Just then the silence was finally broken.

  "Carly.....look. What happened between me and your dad was.....well we weren't......"

  "Having sex?" I interjected.

  "Well.....no." She giggled.

  "Then.....why were you and him naked in his closet?" I asked.

  "We weren't naked kid. Your dad had pants on and I was getting dressed when you dad came in and we were talking about how it would be nice if I stayed a little longer when I guess I let my feeling for him take over and I......"

  "Kissed him?" I said getting excited.

Regan began to blush and tried to cover it up by covering her face with her hair.

  "God why am I such an idiot? I shouldn't be falling for this man again!" She said had she faceplanted on the table.

  "Why not? He's perfect for you!"

  "Carly Prince and I are a complicated mess and it wouldn't be healthy to have that around you and your brother."

  "But I'm a complicated mess too! So is Joey! See? It works out fine!" I giggled.

Regan grabbed my hand and held it from the other side of the table

  "You're really sweet but I think that-"

We were soon interrupted by the sound of my dad coming to the dining room and sitting down at the head of the table. Regan and I looked at him as he tried to play off what had happened earlier.

  "What? Did I do something?" He asked confused.

  "Well.....hello father. How.....are ya doing? Such wonderful weather we're having! I was just talking to Regan about-"

  "Save it kid. I know what you're about to do. Where's Joey?"

  "Sleeping. Did you at least think about what I said?"

He looked at me and Regan and shook his head.

  "I think you two are up to something. If I didn't know any better I'd think you two were mother and daughter already."

Regan and I giggled at the thought.

  "I guess it would be kinda nice to be a mom one day. Maybe even marry my one true love?" Regan said to him.

My dad had a big smile on his face as they gazed at each other.

  "Yeah. One day. Maybe." He said running a hand through her curls.

I need to push this along. I'm running out of time and if she leaves before my dad gets his act together me and Joey may never get our mom.