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Chapter Thirty

It's so freaking cold.

I shivered inside my coat. Even though I was wearing everything necessary to protect myself from the cold, December's freezing winds had no mercy on me or anyone around me.

"We're gonna freeze to death," Lau rubbed her gloved hands together.

"We'll be fine," Jordan passed an arm over her shoulder to hold her to his side.

"I'm really sorry," Helen muttered.

We were walking through the coldest night of the year. Why? Well, there was no way we would allow Helen to walk home by herself. Small snowflakes fell on us, there were in my hair, in my face, everywhere. I could see my breathing turning white as soon as it left my mouth.

I was shaking without control and we hadn't even finished passing in front of Lau's house. We had to be careful, the sidewalk was totally frozen. It was slippery and so was the road therefore we couldn't drive our way over there. Helen's house wasn't really far from our street.

"I'm really sorry," Helen repeated, "When I went out of the house, it wasn't this bad and I really needed someone-"

"It's cool," I gave her a genuine smile, "I understand." 

We passed in front of Shane's house and we saw him through his room's window. He was on the second floor talking through his phone. He was in a red shirt wearing a Santa Claus hat. I smiled. I guessed his parents made him wear it. His gaze fell on us and he narrowed his eyes.

He hung up and pushed his window up to yell at us, "What the hell? Are you guys suicidal?"

"Hey, man! Merry Christmas!" Jordan waved his shaky hand at him.

"Nice hat!" I couldn't help it.

Shane glared at me, "Hello there, frozen minion."

I chuckled, "Hello there, jerkpid."

Shane gave me a boyish grin.

"I'm sorry to interrupt your weird greetings," Lau cut in, "But we're freezing our asses out here. Let's keep moving before I lose a finger."

We started to move again, and Shane yelled something at us but we didn't get it.

"What?" Jordan screamed back at him.

"Nothing! Keep going. I'll catch up with you guys in a sec!" Shane said before closing his window.

Some houses later, Shane trotted towards us. How he didn't fall in the frozen sidewalk was a miracle. He was completely covered like us: gloves, hat, coat and scarf. He was holding two steel travel mugs. I frowned.

"I brought hot chocolate," he offered the mugs, "It'll keep us warm."

-Lau snatched one from him, "That was actually smart. I'm impressed."

"Me too." Jordan admitted.

Shane glowered at them, "A thank you would've been enough." Lau had some hot chocolate and then passed the mug over to Helen.

Shane handed me the remaining mug and I took a sip. I felt the hot liquid running down my throat, instantly warming me up.

"This tastes amazing," I said in awe.

Shane shrugged arrogantly, "Thanks."

Lau rolled her eyes, "You obviously didn't prepare it so shut up."

"But I brought it here, through the snow," Shane defended, "I'm like your Christmas hero or something."

I smiled, shaking my head, "Right. Let's keep moving."

We moved our feet again but Shane just wouldn't shut up, "Now that I think about it," he started, "I'm hot, bringing you a hot beverage to make you guys hot. Wow, I'm cool."

I mentally slapped myself, "Did the chocolate have alcohol?"

"No," Shane didn't get the sarcasm.

Now that we all lived in the same street, bumping into each other wasn't a surprise. Therefore when we saw Jason coming towards us in the opposite direction, I wasn't shocked. Who was? Helen.

She stopped in her tracks, causing Lau to crash into her back and mumbled an 'ow'.

I held Helen's gloved hand, "It's okay." I whispered. I knew she wasn't ready to see him. I understood the feeling more than anyone. I went through something similar when I saw Evan in the school parking lot a month ago. I wasn't ready, just like Helen wasn't at that moment. 

Helen bit her lower lip, "I can't-"

I squeezed her hand, "You'll be okay." Jason was typing something on his phone. He hadn't lifted his gaze so he hadn't noticed us.

"Why are we stopping?" Shane asked from behind.  

 A sad smile made its way up to my lips. Jason was my best friend but he was being a jerk to Helen and she didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve going through something as scary as a possible pregnancy on her own. She had enough with her traumatic childhood. He knew she loved him and he used that to hurt her and leave her hanging. God, she loved him so much. Her eyes were glowing as she stared at him.

Love should never be used as power over the other person.

 Love is a pure, valuable thing that you should cherish, not use like a weapon to hurt someone.

I never expected Jason to act this way. This attitude of his started with senior year. I knew he was hanging out with some college guys that were sons of friends of his mother. I also knew he was going to more parties than ever in his life. Is this a phase?

People were supposed to change. I didn't expect him to be the same cute boy who played doctor with me when I scraped my knee when I was six. However, I did expect him to change for good, not for bad. Deep down, he had a good heart. I knew that. But he needed help finding it and I was going to dig in his chest until I found it.

I knew the guy. I knew the way to do that.

A devilish grin formed on my lips. Jason was about to get a lesson, "Helen, do you trust me?" I looked at her.

She nodded, "Yes, why?"

I glanced over my shoulder, "Shane, I'm gonna ask you something and I don't want to hear any buts or questions," I continued before he spoke, "Hug Helen as if you were two happy lovers walking down the street."

"What?" Everyone said at unison.

"Just do it. Just like Jordan is holding Laura to his side. Quickly." I pushed Helen back to Shane's side. With a frown, Shane did as he was told. Awkwardly, he passed an arm over Helen's shoulder, "Smile to each other. Jason is gonna bump into us soon so act it up."

"Jules-" Jordan started but I raised my hand to stop him.

"Let's just keep walking. I'll go ahead because I'm the third wheel, well, more like the fifth wheel but you get the point." I winked at them and hurried on my steps. 

I started walking normally when I was a few steps from Jason I spoke, "Jason?" I pretended a surprise tone.

Jason lifted his gaze from his phone and frowned when he saw me, "Jules? What the hell are you doing out in the cold?"

We faced each other and I smiled at him, "I could ask the same thing,"

He pinched my cheek, gaining a chuckle from me, "I was going to come over your house to wish you a merry Christmas. Why are you out?"

 "We're just walking Helen home." I gestured behind me. Jason froze when I said her name and he looked behind me. I followed his gaze and I watched his smile vanished. Shane and Helen were acting their asses off on that sidewalk. Shane was playing with her hair smiling sweetly at her while Helen was looking up at him with a silly smile. Shane whispered something in her ear and she giggled.

I nodded approvingly. They were good, I gotta give them that.

I looked back at my best friend and his chest was rising and falling quickly. His knuckles turned white as he squeezed his hands at his sides.

"What the fuck is she doing with him?" I knew he was fighting the urge to go over them and pulled her away from Shane. His stupid pride wouldn't let him do that though.

"Hum?" I pretended to glance behind him innocently, "Oh, them. Just hanging out." I shrugged, "Shane is hot, can't say I blame her."

Jason took a step forward, pursing his lips.

God, he wanted to pull her away from Shane so bad. His eyes blazed with jealousy.

I'm the best at evil plans. 

The guys finally reached us. Helen and Shane smiled at him.

"Hey, man." Shane said casually and Jason licked his lips to pretend a smile.

Helen acted as cool as possible, "Hi, Jason." She said coolly and I struggled to high-five her.

"Hi." He forced the word out of his lips, glaring at their joined hands.

Lau and Jordan appeared next to Helen. They greeted Jason as well. That was it for the show.

"We're in a hurry. It's cold out here," I stated, "See you around, Jason." I kept on our way and the others followed, leaving a speechless Jason behind us.

"Wait!" Jason shouted, we all turned our heads towards him. He rolled his upper lip into his mouth, "Helen, can I talk to you for a sec?"

Helen and I shared a quick glance but Shane spoke for us, "Sorry, man. We're in a hurry and I don't want her freezing out here more than she needs to." Jason glared at him openly, "Let's go, babe."

And we walked away.

And after some blocks, we finally arrived to Helen's house and my stupid brain decided to function properly.

Helen's house...

Her aunt's house...

And for the moment, Evan's house.

How could I miss that ridiculously important information? Well, I couldn't actually blame myself. It'd been an eventful night. With the whole 'possible pregnancy' drama and then Shane's hot drink and then Jason's drama, I hadn't had the time to realize there was a chance of seeing Evan that night.

My heart pounded desperately in my chest at that possibility. The sleeping dragons woke up, stretched and danced around my stomach. I missed that. I missed that excitement and nervousness sensation when I knew I was going to see him.

A month had passed and I still loved Evan with every piece of my heart.

He had lied and hurt me but I guessed it was like that song from Selena Gomez... 'The heart wants what it wants'

I just couldn't help it.

I wasn't ready to go back to him but I knew my feelings for him wouldn't change. No matter how badly he had hurt me. They just wouldn't change.

That gorgeous dark poet had stolen my heart and I had no idea of how to get it back. I didn't even know if I wanted to get it back.  

I hugged myself as we finished the front stairs and stepped on the house's porch.

My scared heart spoke for me, "Well, you're here. We should go back."

"No way!" Helen grabbed my arm, "You guys have to come in and get warm. Aunt Paula prepared some hot cocoa, cookies and other delicious snacks."

Lau was the first one to step forward, "She got me at cookies."

I sighed, knowing at the mention of food all my friends were in.

Helen opened the door for us and I was the third one to enter behind Lau. Shane was last. The house's warmth felt just incredible. I could feel my extremities properly. We took our coats, gloves and hats off and followed Helen into the living room.

I was feeling my heart in my throat with each step we took. I glanced at the fireplace and my heart faltered at the sight of my beautiful dark poet.

Evan...

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Author's note: Muahaha, I did it! Cliffhanger, sorry, I couldn't help it. Jason got a lesson, didn't he?

But since I also have a good side (not only the bad one who likes cliffhangers) I have an offer for you, guys. Next chapter will be up next Saturday but if you want it sooner, VOTE! :D If this chapter hits the 8000 votes before Saturday, you'll have your chapter sooner than that. This is just to make it fun because the chapter always go over that quantity anyway but let's see how fast that can be achieved. Muahaha ;)

Selena Gomez song really fits this story so you should watch the video. The heart wants what it wants... I think it applies to both Helen and Jules. It also applies to Shane, don't you think?

There's a million reasons why I should give you up but the hearts wants it wants...

Love, hot cocoa and jealous guys,

Ariana.