he stalks me when i go to school,
he stalks me when i come back home.
he keeps count of how many dishes i've washed,
he checks my homework
and he gives out punishment for my mistakes.

i cook the food
i stay away
i keep house
when he comes back.

he lays next to me
he takes my breath away
he makes me feel so defiled, so grotesque
and i wish i could do the same.

today i cooked his favorite supper
and uncorked his favorite wine
he ate and drank and slept
i watched and packed and left.

my fascist, fanatical demon;
my dear, darling father.

~m