𝔊REEN 𝔇REAM ﹏ ₊ ᶻz
﹟ A pr❍m⋆ti⟡n shᝰp by 𝐘𝐔 𝐇𝐔𝐀 𝐆𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐍

◟→ as the day dawns ⸝⸝

░﹐ᶻᶻ꒰⋆ Name: everberriii   ๋࣭ ᵎᵎ  𓂋 ✦

░﹐ᶻᶻ ꒰ Dream tag: everberriii ᭪ 𓂋 ✦

░﹐ᶻᶻ ꒰ The author: i love reading but love writing even more; once i discovered how others could create their own worlds within the marks on a page and saw myself how they came to life with my imagination, i wanted to try myself!! ^^ ive been weaving my own worlds with the threads of beautiful words and bright imaginations ever since then    .ᐟ 𓂋 ✦ .

░﹐ᶻᶻ ꩜𓂃Current Status:   ongoing, slow updates  ⑅ོ+
5th September 2024𓂋 ✦ .

░﹐ᶻᶻ Genre: fanfiction, romance, angst   𓂋 ✦

░﹐ᶻᶻ Chapter Count: 6 𓂋 ✦ .

░﹐ᶻᶻ Mature/LGBTQ Themes: language 𓂋 ✦ .

░﹐ᶻᶻ Highest Dream Ranking:  highest ranking : dates - aug 13 (?)

#1 - princessxprince #2 - sadandhappy #4 - hanjisungff
𓂋 ✦ .

░﹐ᶻᶻ Protagonist(s):
jisung, han
       de' claire, luna𓂋 ✦ .

░﹐ᶻᶻ Dream Summary: "Kill me."

Her breath sent shivers through him as it feathered over his ear, the words haunting. She had whispered permission so calmly, so carelessly, and the hurt in her watering eyes told him why. Those onyx eyes overflowed with pain, and a tear began its slow path down her cheek as her gaze searched his, waiting for an answer.

Delicate voice cracking, she commanded Jisung again, barely audible.
So he raised the dagger, the silver tip pressing into her bare back as he held her waist with his left hand, the porcelain skin turning cold under his shaking fingers. Her skin felt beautiful under his touch, but as he traced her figure, her body felt heavy in his lap, his right hand gripping the handle of the dagger so tightly that his knuckles turned white.

The feeling of the cold metal pressing into her back made her breath snag in her throat. She held Jisung's gaze, her mind blank as she searched his eyes. They were dark, empty - determined. His stare was unwavering as he applied pressure, pushing the dagger father until the freezing metal drew blood.

He whispered a broken apology, his voice barely coming out of his parched throat.

"I'm sorry, my princess."  𓂋 ✦ .

→﹐ ⛩ ﹒ 𝐏ROOF﹒⟢

🗝ㅤ۫ Promoted by: n1lyyx ‹𝟹
🗝ㅤ۫ Voted by: n1lyyx‹𝟹
🗝ㅤ۫ Review by:  Elixyzsss ‹𝟹
🗝ㅤ۫ Chapter cnp by:  n1lyyx‹𝟹
🗝ㅤ۫ Notes:  Apologies on my behalf, I thought I already had this published. Once again, I'm so sorry. ‹𝟹

❝  ⌗ . Short Feedback on the first chapter  .  ⁺ 

The writing style in this book is absolutely gorgeous, with vivid descriptions and a strong sense of atmosphere that really draws the reader in. I barely noticed any mistakes in terms of grammar or spelling, which made for a smooth and enjoyable read overall. However, one small critique is the overuse of certain sentence structures, like "I should, shouldn't I?" or "...as well, no?" These pop up quite often and can start to feel repetitive. Varying the dialogue a bit more would keep it fresh and engaging.

 I could almost smell the food and feel the energy of the crowds. These kinds of moments made the world feel alive and full of history, especially with how the festival connects to the royal family and the princess's birthday. You've managed to weave in a lot of cultural and emotional significance without over-explaining, which is great.

Aside from that, the rich descriptions sometimes overshadow the characters' emotions and actions. Diving a little deeper into their thoughts and interactions would add another layer of depth, making the story even more impactful. With just a few tweaks, this beautifully written story could reach its full potential!

𝖂𝖊 'thank you for choosing 𝐮𝐬
May.your !¡ dreams succeed! :: ﹆ ꩜