* * *

For many people who live in tropical regions of the world, the baking heat emitted by heavy sunshine can sometimes tend to be a major contender. Although many are used to it, the variable intensities of its sometimes scorching bite against the skin never gets old. And the most privileged tend to be those who can afford stable air-conditioning for their homes, places of work and other frequently inhabited enclosures. In Nigeria, even vehicles can be quite regularly devoid of stable air-conditioning because of its inevitable tendency to heighten fuel costs, which many vehicle owners would rather keep at bare minimum, unless of course those who belong to upper 1% or the affluent 9% and some middle class individuals who have no problem at all sparing little expense to provide themselves and their loved ones access to the most fundamental elements of comfort and welfare, no matter how challenging it is. As indeed the saying goes, life is too short not to live well. Nevertheless, a staggeringly greater number than 40% realistically cannot afford to make such decisions. Hence, when a vehicle is possessed and it came into ownership with a functional air-conditioner, if the air-conditioner goes bad for the first or second time, chances are that it will stay that way, and the breath of nature would become the major source of cooling.

Right now, Peter and his father, Mr. Ehigie Ojo are enjoying this breath in a public transport vehicle, as it speeds across buildings on either side of a major road. The young man conducting the bus payments yells out loud, as he forcefully unlocks the door for another passenger to alight,

"After all my Tramadol?? After all my Morocco??... Where the COVID wan stay??? "

Mr. Ehigie, one of the vocal passengers in the jalopy type bus responds, "What are you saying, Mr Man!.. Dem tell you sey na Tramadol dey kill virus??"

The conductor responds, with eyes partially closed yet at the same time partially open, "Oga!.. I know wetin I dey talk. Ee no fit survive for inside my body! Na oyibo ee dey first affect and our politicians wey dey run come from abroad. This virus is killing them more than it's killing us. Na dem dey fear pass now. Na we dem dey envy because we no dey too get am. Body wey sun dey mamar; body wey paraga don burn, na'i wan con dey get virus?"

"So if we no dey too get am, e con mean sey na because of drug?? " Mr. Ehigie asks, and then adds, "Na everybody dey take paraga??"

Immediately, everybody laughs.

In mild embracement at the entire audience laughing at his words, the conductor then replies, "E do, oga.. Con dey come down."

"I neva reach where I dey go." Mr. Ehigie says.

In grumbling defiance, the conductor then responds looking towards the window, "Eh.. We go soon reach."

While all this is happening, Peter remains silent, as he has been for the entire trip. The public argument so far has yielded great internal discomfort for him and continues to remind him with each exchange why he doesn't like going anywhere with his father.

"Better go and get your vaccine." Mr. Ehigie echoes at the conductor, who then responds,
"I no dey take any vaccine. No be my body dem wan do experiment for."

"My friend, that is a bogus accusation. Are you a conspiracy theorist??" Mr. Ehigie exclaims rhetorically, assuming the tone of a very enlightened man.

Everybody in the bus bursts into laughter at the sound of his posh accent.

"Oga, na you know." the conductor responds.

After finally getting off the bus, Peter and his father begin the journey to the house of Chief Balogun which is almost a kilometre away from the junction of the street by the major road. He is the brother of Mr. Ehigie's late wife, Patricia Ojo, formerly Patricia Balogun. Ever since Shola and Peter lost their mother, who was a very beloved member of her extended family, some distant uncles, aunts and other relatives have offered support to them in various little ways, especially in terms of financial assistance during the funeral and other burial arrangements. Afterwards, the children have also maintained correspondence with their relatives, which has come to reap some positive fruits in number of ways. For example, their mother's favourite cousin, Femi Balogun who lives in Lagos was the one who bought Shola his first smartphone four years ago and has sent some money on occasion to Peter and their father, to support their upkeep. The current man of the hour, Chief Ade Richard Balogun was the relative who publicly donated the highest amount to support his sister's funeral and burial ceremony. Once before also, he has loaned about ₦50,000 to Mr. Ehigie to help complete payment for Shola's highschool tuition fees. He once served as a congress member of the House of Representatives but unfortunately lost to his opponent after his first tenure. However, he retains his substantial political connections and influence across states, institutions and amongst elites of Nigerian society, as well as his ambition to run for office once again in the future. He lives majorly in Lagos with his family, although five of his seven children are based outside the country; one in the United States, another in Germany, one in the UK, another in Sweden and one currently working as a doctor in Canada.
From time to time, Chief Ade travels down to Benin from Lagos to check on some of his business enterprises in the city and resides in his humble mansion where he currently has permanently employed cleaning, kitchen, gardening and caretaking staff, some of whom are assisted by a few unpaid houseboys and housegirls. Rumour has it that in addition to checking on his businesses and investments, Chief Balogun also comes to Benin City to check on his second unofficial family with a covert mistress and some biological kids. True or not, he nevertheless tends to poorly disguise before scrutinizing eyes, his slew of periodically changing mistresses, whom he tends to fund and compensate for their company and services very lavishly.

After enduring the long trek under the sun's blistering heat and soaked in back, chest and thigh sweat, Peter and his father arrive at 'Casa Balogun' and knock on the thick imperial gate. There is no response. As the father continues to knock, Peter looks to the concrete pillar beside the gate, "Does the bell work?"

"I don't know. Try it, let's see." Ehigie responds.

While Peter rings the doorbell, the gatekeeper finally rushes back from his bathroom break and yells, "Who dey there!!!"

Ehigie asks in confusion, "Na you be the new gateman? Where Musa?"

"Oga who you be, please?" the gateman rebuffs in polite annoyance.

"I'm Mr. Ehigie Ojo. We came to see chief. We are his family members. I'm his sister's husband and this is his nephew."

In slight distaste, the gatekeeper scrutinizes them both from head to toe and asks, "Wetin be ya sista name?"

"She's my wife. Her name is Patricia. Patricia Ojo. Just tell chief sey na e sister husband, Ehigie Ojo na'i dey gate."

"Okay, I dey come." the gatekeeper respond before running rapidly back to the house to confirm their identities.

A few minutes later, he comes back and lets them in.

Indeed, the compound lives up to expectation. Ehigie has come here twice before, but Peter has only come for the first time. It's about 215,000 square feet and the entire environment is painted with an alternating mixture of mostly cream, brown outlines and gold, with walls that have across them a symmetric line of fluorescent bulb lamps that illuminate the opulent compound at night and reflect the nearly incandescent beauty of the ixora jasmine flowers bordering the walls and neatly cultivated green bushes, interspersed with prominent corolla of some ruby coloured hibiscus. The floors have red and grey interlocking tiles, and as they pass by the servants' quarters, they are ushered into the main building via a staircase behind the house, unlike at the main entrance which is usually for more important or less familiar visitors. They then come out at the posterior balcony of the house where they meet some attendants sitting outside and prepping for a meal and others going about their jobs before entering into the main hallway that leads to the private supplementary living room, where Chief Balogun more informally entertains his guests. Along the way, Peter keeps looking around, simply in awe of the share luxury of the home. And to think that this is only one of the many homes of Chief Balogun bewilders him all the more. He can only imagine what the man's primary mansion in Lagos is like. He smiles, and dreams to one day have a home like this. While they stop by the kitchen door as their chaperone makes a pause to ask some management related questions to one of the houseboys, Peter looks into it and finds that it is also divided into two parts; the main sophisticated kitchen and then the semi-traditional baking, prepping and barbeque kitchen that leads to another open balcony behind the house. The only unappealing sight he comes across is that of one of the housegirls who has eyes reddened and soaked in tears as she washes the dishes in the large sink. She looks about twelve years old. Apparently, she seems to have had an altercation with one of the older staff who then scolded her and then she began washing the dishes. As they move further into the house, the air-conditioners continue to blow crisp wafts of opulent air onto their skin and into their nostrils, and the temperature becomes cooler and cooler in stark transition from the scorching heat outside.

Finally, the men enter into the small living room and find Chief Ade sitting on one of the large embroidered couches surrounding the centre glass table.

"Mr Ojo, how are you?" he echoes.

"Chief Balogun! Chief Balogun! I greet you, sir." Mr. Ehigie lauds as he bows slightly, raising both his hands to greet him.

"How is the family?" Chief Ade asks.

"Very fine, sir!" Ehigie responds.

"Good afternoon, sir." Peter also greets with a very respectful bow.

"Ah.. Is this your son??" the chief asks, as Mr. Ehigie takes his seat on an adjacent smaller couch.

"Yes, Chief."

"Eeehhh.. The one in university?" he asks again in shock.

"No, he is my second son. Almost in his final year of secondary school."

Chief Ade responds, "Ohh.. okay. I was wondering because he is looking different from the one I saw the last time. Where is he?"

Mr. Ehigie replies, "They're having a continuous assessment in school."

"Okay.." Then Chief Ade looks to Peter, "Your brother is a bit taller and darker."

"Yes, sir." Peter concurs.

"You.. you are like oyibo, just like your late mother. You carried our genes. Very handsome man."

Peter blushes, "Thank you, sir." before taking a seat on the chair at the opposite end of the room.

Ehigie laughs in concurrence with Chief Ade and then asks, "How is the family, sir? I spoke with mummy about three weeks."

"Yes, she is fine. They are all fine. She returned from travel last month." he responds.

"Yes, she mentioned it."

"Our daughter in the US gave birth to her second baby. So she went to stay with her for some months. And before coming back, she just decided to visit the others and spend a few weeks."

Then Mr. Ehigie concurs cheerfully, "Yes.. just finish the round tour of Europe and America."

"Ehen.." Chief Ade responds in laughter. Then he adds, "She get the energy boku."

"So that means you should have up to about ten grand children now o, sir." Mr. Ehigie proclaims almost cheekily.

Chief Ade begins to laugh and then says, "I dey count again?"

Both men burst into laughter.

The chief says again, in embarrassed humour, "After the fourth one gave birth, I stopped counting." Then he adds conclusively, in a bid to absolve himself from his earlier admission,
".. Although, I will try to visit some of them very soon.. when next I have the time to travel."

Peter on the other hand, just keeps smiling politely and staring around the small but palatial living room in admiration, like the quintessential young and respectful wallflower.

Then Chief Ade looks toward him and echoes, "Big man! How old are you now?"

"Sixteen years, sir." Peter responds.

"Wow! That's good. Which means, very soon, we will be thinking of payment of bride price."

Everybody laughs.

"Ahh.. I'm still young, sir."

"Really? You are not o. Where I come from, girls your age are already getting betrothed. The only thing is eh.. since your father has two sons, he will only pay bride price but he will not receive."

They all burst into laughter.

Peter then says amidst the air of humour, "Before I marry, I want to make sure that I have some things in place and I'm stable."

"Now, that's a smart thinking man. Focus on your studies and build yourself up before anything marriage." Chief Ade echoes in approval. "Do you play games? Xbox.. PS5?.." he asks.

Peter is a bit shy to answer. But then he responds, "Not much, sir. But sometimes with my friends."

"Okay. Tell Bola to show you the gaming room. Just go check it out and have some fun."

In excited gratitude, Peter bows, "Okay, sir. Thank you very much." He stands up and then exists to go find the houseboy named Bola.

While Peter exits, an older maid who also seems to be the housekeeper brings in a medium tray with great reverence containing two glasses of orange juice and a flat porcelain plate of stacked samosas. Then she bends to drop it on the small side stool table beside the two men. "Eṣe sir," she says.

"You can take the second glass back. Give it to the young man." chief instructs.

"Ahh.. Thank you, chief." Mr. Ehigie echoes with reverence.

"Okay." The woman responds, as she picks up the glass and genuflects slightly before leaving.

"How is the extended family? Hope everyone is doing fine." Ehigie inquiries earnestly.

"Well.. everything is fine in my home, thanks to God almighty. We have been doing well and hopefully we will continue. But in the extended family.. some eh.. very peculiar things have been happening. It's a good thing I'm no longer a major stakeholder in their affairs. Dem Fagboun and Daramola will be the ones to handle their madness!"

"Ahh.. What happened?" Ehigie asks in curious shock.

"A cousin of mine, Femi.. I'm sure you'll know him. He is now at Kirikiri for a crime he did not commit, all because of a housegirl. Can you imagine??"

"Eh ehhh! Femi Balogun? Ahh.. Heee.. It's that serious??" Ehigie is beyond shocked.

Ade laughs in sarcasm, "Hm.. Beyond serious! As I speak to you today, he is rotting in jail."

"Wow."

"According to the siblings.. they said that eh.. the housegirl was a witch or so who came to destroy their home. She was also collaborating with the wife and after frustrating the man, they got made them send the man to jail over false accusations of assault and even drove the wife insane to the point where she took her own life."

"Yéé!.. Sista Amara?"

"Hm. I think she was buried about five or six months ago. I don't remember."

"What of their son?"

"And that is the one that I find most painful and insulting about the matter. Their son is now being kept from his own family because the wife wrote her will that her son should be raised by the parish priest of one Catholic church they attended. The utter nonsense!"

"He should be with his father's people nau." Ehigie opines sorrowfully.

"Exactly! And the IDIOT who did not drive that woman out long ago, since she refused to bear him children and then allowed himself go to prison instead of dealing with the housegirl and sending her away is now saying that he 'agrees with the wishes of his wife' and that he wants his son to remain with the church. Can you imagine??"

"Ah ahhh.."

"If no be sey na my blood, I for make sure sey ee no come out for that prison wey ee dey. By the time he rot well well.. ee go get sense! I don't know.. why are some men these days are so stupid?? And na the young young ones o, na'i dey behave like this. Before Femi married that woman, I TOLD HIM.. I said, 'So you did not see a Yoruba girl to marry?' Even if no be Lagos girl, because na so so ashawo and eh.. call girls full there. He did not see Ijebu, he did not see Owo, or at least someone from a good family! He went to marry Igbo. Shebi ee don see now? Now, we don't even have anybody from her side to communicate with. Most of her family is dead. She was an orphan at the time of their marriage."

"Ohh.. So sad." Ehigie exclaims.

"And I told them.. When it happened.. I was not informed. So I will NOT interfere. They had already done family meeting and proceeded to the trial before I even found out. Imagine the scandal and disgrace! I'm thankful o. I'm thankful that we are just distant cousins, if not, na my name news for carry. Since they have started it.. let them.. finish it."

Ehigie sighs in response, "Life." Afterwards, he reaches into his rectangular office bag and brings out some things wrapped in paper, "Chief, I brought some eh.. Kola nut for you."

"Ahh!.. That's my man! Thank you."

"You're welcome, sir. I know you like the kola nuts we have here in Edo." Ehigie adds cheerfully.

"Yes.." he collects the wrap from Mr. Ehigie. ".. The quality is unmatched. In Lagos, everything is watered down. So whenever I need kola nuts, I send my P.A. down here to Benin to get it for me."

"Ohh, in case you need again, you can let me know. I have a large scale customer here in Benin, at our main market."

"Oh, alright. That's good. You'll plug me then.. abi how dem take dey talk am? You will be my 'plug'." Chief Ade says.

Then they both burst into laughter.

Afterwards, Peter walks back into the living room and goes to his father's office bag to discreetly bring out his phone charger.

"Ahh, you are done?" Chief Ade asks, with bits of Kola being crushed between his teeth.

"I'm still playing, sir." Peter responds, "I just came to collect something."

"Okay."

While Peter walks out of the living room, Chief Ade asks cheekily in a whisper, "Ojo, you sure sey na you born this pikin?.."

"Ahh, Chief.." Mr. Ehigie exclaims, although in a meek manner and cheerful manner, ".. Which kind question be dat one nau? "

Ade bursts into laughter and then continues with a humorous whisper, ".. The boy no just be like you at all. So calm and decent.."

Ehigie responds with a chuckle, "Na because ee dey here o. Once we reach house now, ee no go let person here word."

"Haha.. Ee reach to ask o sha.. because right now, things are happening in this world. As you see me so.. all my children, I do DNA test for them. I just run am codedly. None of dem know."

"Ehn ehhh?.." Ehigie exclaims in surprise.

"Yes o. Even up until today, some of my friends are still finding out some difficult truths about their own children. You know Justice Kunle.. one of the owners of this filling station that has branches all over Nigeria.. one of them is even at the junction. He found out last year that of all of his three children, not one was his own. They were all sired by his former chauffeur. Women are terrible. The only thing na sey being my sister, at least I know sey my sister cannot do that."

Mr. Ehigie nods and lets out a breath of acknowledgement in response.

"What class is he in now?" Chief Ade asks.

"He's in S.S. 2. They are currently on their midterm break. Although.. this period, I'm trying to come up with some money to complete payment for his tuition fees. Things have really been difficult for us."

"I know, my brother. This country is turning into something else. That's why we're doing our best to see how we can get back into office, inorder to push for some necessary changes. This government is not doing a good job at all." Chief Ade responds passionately, as though equally impacted by the prevailing socio-economic hardship and intending to be some kind of force for good, as he was unable to be during his limited four year term in office.

Mr. Ehigie continues, "Yes. As the older one, Shola recently started his second semester at the university, I just finished paying his school fees, and currently, we still have about forty five thousand left to complete Peter's school fees."

"..That's the younger one?" Chief Ade asks.

"Yes," Ehigie responds.

"Okay. I just remembered also.. the children of my brother, Itan and some of my wife's people who we're currently sponsoring and taking care of.. they started, I think, their second semester as well. Hopefully, when they finally graduate, they can begin to make ends meet for themselves."

After dusting his hands from the particles of Kola nut, Ade yells, "Bola!!! Bring water for me!"

Then he brings out his smart phone and starts to dial a number, "Heii.. I was supposed to call iya o.. She go don dey vex now."

As the call rings in his ear, he asks Ehigie, "Did you see the champions league final yesterday?"

"Yes.. It was quite a heated tussle." Ehigie responds.

"Hello! Ahh... Ololufe mi.. Bawo ni? Ma binu.. Emi ko pe ọ fun igba diẹ. Mo n ṣe daradara... Mo n gbiyanju lati ṣe diẹ ninu iṣowo ati lẹhinna, emi yoo pada si ile ni o kere ju ọsẹ kan... Bawo ni o ṣe n ṣe? Ṣe o ti jeun?... Ni a nla ọjọ niwaju. Emi yoo pe e nigbamii. Mo wa pẹlu ẹnikan ni bayi. Ogbeni Ojo ni... Ọkọ Patricia. O wa lati be pẹlu ọmọ rẹ. O dara, Emi yoo. O dabọ!! " After ending the call in the Yoruba language, he smiles and says in English, "She said I should greet you."

"Okay. Please extend my regards later to her as well." Mr. Ehigie responds with a similar smile.

"Bola!!! Iyabo!!! Are you people not in this house again??" Chief Ade screams.

In less than a few seconds, Iyabo jumps in, "Baba, O pe mi."

"Where have you been since?? I said go and get me water!!" he rebuffs.

"O dara," Iyabo echoes before rushing away.

Afterwards, Mr. Ehigie turns to him again and says with reverence, "Chief, please I would like to ask for a loan, in order to pay the remainder of my son's school fees. That's for Peter. The school has required us to pay about seventy five thousand naira, and in addition to Shola's school fees, I've been able to pay up to thirty from Peter's school fees. What I need to complete it is forty five. I promise unfailingly I'll pay you back within the next four months."

"Eh.. I understand. I understand.. It's just that right now, I need to settle certain expenses, loans that I've taken for my business and even salaries for my staff. My wife's sister, Pelumi has been in the hospital for stage two cancer for almost three months now and I've been paying for her chemotherapy and other treatment. If you had given me prior notice, for sure, I would've been able to provide it shap shap.. Ah ah.. what is ₦‎45,000?"
Then he scratches his partially grey beard, "What you will do eh.. come back in two weeks. Yes, two weeks. I'll be in Benin by that time handling some business. And.. yes, I'll give you something."

"Alright.. Thank you, chief. Should I come here or to the warehouse?"

"Come to the warehouse. You can send that your son.. What's his name?.."

"..Shola"

"Yes.. Shola. And he's not even here now.. Ehh.. I would've loved to explain directly to him, so he would know how to go about it. But ehh.. just tell him to come. You know the route nau. Direct him."

* * *

Glossary:
Morocco - A narcotic mixture of cannabis and other components
Paraga - Alcoholic herbal mixture
Oyibo - White person/Light skinned person
"Where the COVID wan stay??? " - "Where would the COVID inhabit?"
".. Dem tell you sey na Tramadol dey kill virus??" - "Did anyone tell you that Tramadol kills viruses??"
"Oga!.. I know wetin I dey talk. Ee no fit survive for inside my body! Na oyibo ee dey first affect and our politicians wey dey run come from abroad... Na dem dey fear pass now. Na we dem dey envy because we no dey too get am. Body wey sun dey mamar; body wey paraga don burn, na'i wan con dey get virus?" - "Sir!.. I know what I'm saying. The virus can't survive in my body! It affects mostly white people and those who live in affluent parts of the world, like our politicians who are running back home and cancelling their international trips... They're the ones who are most afraid. And now they envy us because we rarely get infected. Bodies constantly heated by the sun; bodies that have been burnt by paraga, are they bodies that would easily catch a virus?"
"So if we no dey too get am, e con mean sey na because of drug?? " - "So if we don't get infected that often, does it automatically mean it's because of hard drugs?"
"Na everybody dey take paraga??" - "Does everybody take narcotics??"
"E do, oga.. Con dey come down." - "That's enough, sir.. It's about time you alighted."
"I neva reach where I dey go." - "I haven't gotten to my stop."
"Eh.. We go soon reach." - "Anyhow.. we will soon get there.
"I no dey take any vaccine. No be my body dem wan do experiment for." - "I'm not taking any vaccine. My body isn't going to be used for any experiment."
"Oga, na you know." - "Whatever.."
"Who dey there!!!" - "Who's there!!!"
"Na you be the new gateman? Where Musa?" - "Are you the new gateman? Where's Musa?"
"Oga who you be, please?" - "Sir, please who are you?"
"Wetin be ya sista name?" - "What's your sister's name?"
"Just tell chief sey na ee sister husband, Ehigie Ojo na'i dey gate." - "Just tell chief that it's his sister's husband, Ehigie Ojo who's at the gate."
"Okay, I dey come." - "Alright, I'm coming."
"Ehen.. She get the energy boku." - "Exactly.. She's got a lot of energy."
"I dey count again?" - "Do I even still count?"
"If no be sey na my blood, I for make sure sey ee no come out for that prison wey ee dey. By the time he rot well well.. ee go get sense! " - "If he weren't my relative, I would've made sure he didn't come out of prison. By the time he rot well enough.. he'd have become smarter!"
"..because na so so ashawo and eh.. call girls full there." - ".. because it's full of prostitutes and call girls."
"Shebi ee don see now? " - "I hope he's seen the result?"
"na my name news for carry." - "My name would've been all over the news."
"..abi how dem take dey talk am?" - "or how do they say it?"
"Ojo, you sure sey na you born this pikin?.." - "Ojo, are you sure you sired this boy?"
"Which kind question be dat one nau? " - "Come on.. what sort of question is that?"
"The boy no just be like you at all. So calm and decent.." - "The boy is so different from you. He's so calm and decent.."
"Na because ee dey here o. Once we reach house now, ee no go let person here word." - "That's only because he's quite new here. When we're back home, he's usually one of the biggest talkers."
"Ee reach to ask o sha.. As you see me so.. all my children, I do DNA test for them. I just run am codedly. None of dem know." - "It's not too unreasonable a question to be asked though.. I had a DNA test done on all my children to confirm their paternity. I did it discreetly and none of them knew."
"The only thing na sey being my sister, at least I know sey my sister cannot do that." - "The only thing is, being my sister, I knew her and I know that she couldn't do such a thing."
"..She go don dey vex now " - "..She'd likely be angry now."
"Ololufe mi.. Bawo ni? Ma binu.. Emi ko pe ọ fun igba diẹ. Mo n ṣe daradara... Mo n gbiyanju lati ṣe diẹ ninu iṣowo ati lẹhinna, emi yoo pada si ile ni o kere ju ọsẹ kan... Bawo ni o ṣe n ṣe? Ṣe o ti jeun?... Ni a nla ọjọ niwaju. Emi yoo pe e nigbamii. Mo wa pẹlu ẹnikan ni bayi. Ogbeni Ojo ni... Ọkọ Patricia. O wa lati be pẹlu ọmọ rẹ. O dara, Emi yoo. O dabọ!! " - "My dear.. How are you? Sorry I haven't called you for some time. I'm doing fine... I'm trying to get some business done and afterwards, I'll be back home in less than a week... How are you doing? Hope you've eaten... Have a great day. I'll call you later. I'm with someone right now. It's Mr. Ojo... The husband of Patricia. He came over to visit with his son. Okay, I will. Bye!!"
"Baba, O pe mi." - "Sir, you called me."
"O dara," - "Okay"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading!
Please remember to vote if you liked this chapter😊