"Ready?" Darry asks as Lexi and Dally walk in.

"Ready," they shrug.

"Ready," I smile as I peck Soda's lips.

"Ready," the rest of the gang says together.

"Okay, Soda and Pony with me. Two-bit and Johnny with Steve. Lexi and Dylan with Dally," Darry instructs the gang.

"Great, I'm stuck with the two girls of the gang," Dally sighs. 

"Yup," Lexi and I laugh.

"Well, I'll go with Dally and Lexi so then Dylan can go with Soda," Pony offers winking at Soda and I in the process.

"That's real nice of you Pone," I smile as I ruffle up his hair. "Darry?"

"Go, have fun with Dally Pony," he sighs in defeat before turning his attention to Dally. "No speeding! Don't do anything dangerous or else Soda and I will skin you ourselves. Ya hear Dallas?"

"Yea, yea, yea, I hear," he shrugs before we all load into the car.

The car ride wasn't bad but, it wasn't good either though. Soda and Darry were talking the whole time so, I fell asleep on Soda's lap.

****************

"Dyl! Wake up Dylan!" Soda says softly as he shakes me back and forth.

"Just wake her up Soda!" Dally snaps.

"No! No! Let her sleep, she spends most night crying and not sleeping. I'm not sure if you guys know this or not, but she's been pretty depressed since Kendall's death and she just got over it when Rylee died," Lexi replies.

"My poor baby, I'll just carry her to the camp grounds then, she needs her sleep," Soda replies softly his voice laced with sympathy.

"Really? God, she's sure is good at hiding it," Steve says softly.

"You guys didn't think she went off the handle and tried to kill herself over a guy, did you?" She asks her voice filled with attitude.

"Well, kind of," I hear Johnny whisper shyly. I don't think I've ever truly had a conversation with Johnny and I can NOT believe Lexi is telling them this!

"No, she didn't. It wasn't because of him well it was, but it wasn't," she sasses them. I don't think I've ever heard Lexi this sassy.

"Then why'd she do it?" Darry asks. "I watched it and it-it was awful. I love her like a sister and I watched her try to kill herself."

"Well, she's lost a lot of things she cares about in her life and losing the gang and Soda, was to much for her handle," she informs them.

"Oh," they all say in unison.

"Lexi, isn't she gonna kill you when she finds out you're telling us all this?" Two-bit asks as Soda kisses my head.

"Yea," Steve agrees.

"Well, that's why she isn't gonna find out," Lexi snaps.

"I-I-I don't know if I can do that," Pony stumbles over his words.

"You're gonna do it," Dally yells.

"Okay," Pony whispers.

"What about me? She's my girlfriend!" Soda yells.

"I don't care," Dally yells. "Soda, if you tell her I swear!"

"What will you do?" He asks no fear in his words, but instead confidence.

"Well, then I'll have to skin you," he threatens.

"What if she overheard?" I ask them as I jump out of Soda's arms and walk over to Lexi who is frozen in place.

"Dylan, I-I-I'm sorry, but they deserve to know," she mumbles the last part.

"Really? They should know about me? Then they should also know that you've had an abortion before and oh yea your boobs are fake," I spill angrily.

"How 'bout your tramp stamp?" She asks her eyes narrowing.

"Shall I tell them about Brian?" I ask her. "That's her ex and he's the reason we came here. He wanted her to keep the baby so she got the abortion against the fathers approval and that was what, five-six months ago."

"You have no right saying any of that!" She yells. "She has a tramp stamp that reads property of and she's waiting for her husband."

"Oh my god!" I screech.

"Or your drinking problem?" She says bitchiness dripping from her mouth before she laughs loudly as my face drops. "Whoops! I just told the whole gang your biggest secret, but I'm not sorry and I don't regret it."

"Chick fight, hot," I hear Steve whisper to Two-bit.

"Watch out Steve!" I snap looking at him.

"Sorry," he replies quickly as he throws his hands in the air.

"Property of Sodapop," Lexi mocks. "Property of Sodapop or will it still end up being property of Noah? I know you're still in love with him, but it's okay Soda's not in love with you either. He loves Sandy always will."

"You have no right saying that!" I yell.

"I wish I grabbed Kendall instead of you! She was always a better sister than you were. You're nothing, but a bitch. I wish you died that day instead of Kendall!" She yells in my face. I turn around and start to walk away as she releases what she told me. "Oh my god! Dylan, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that."

I spin around on my heel and look at her, "no Alex, people don't say what they don't mean. Slip of the tongue? Bowl shit! Everything you say, you mean and face it you do wish you grabbed Kendall over me. The whole family does. Kendall, she deserves to still be here today. At least more than I do."

"Dylan, don't say that!" Alex yells. "Dylan!" She continues shouting after me, but I just continue walking ignoring what she's saying. I love Alex, I do, but this isn't working. Tulsa isn't working. Nothing is working.I truly wonder why, I am still here, but Kendall isn't when she's the one who deserves to be alive, not me.