Mary Ellen

"Someday, that entire group of kids will regret ever treating you so terribly." Mrs. Louder is always trying to make me feel better, but they say kids are honest. I know what I am, and I don't need their daily reminders.

I shrugged my shoulders.

"Everyone else loved it, and those kids are just jealous. We are going to have you ready for that Juliard audition, and you're going to forget about all of them." She said.

Easier said than done.

"Let's take it from the top."

Our high school music teacher is also my private voice instructor. No, I don't have the money to pay her, but for some reason she sees something in me.

We went over the same song for another hour and a half.

"You have dance tonight and work tomorrow night?" She asked.

"Yes, then I sit with dad on Thursday so mom can work." I lied, she's never around.

"I'll see you friday?" She asked.

"Yes, right after school." I answered.

"Remember to turn out the lights when you're done, and Mary Ellen, please take my words seriously. They will have regrets, you have a hundred times more talent then all of them put together."

"Thank you Mrs. Louder."

I walked over and took her seat in front of the piano.

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

When the tears come streaming down your face
'Cause you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
What could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

But high up above or down below
When you are too in love to let it show
Oh but if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears come streaming down your face
When you...

I stopped playing and just cried. This is the song I always sing to my dad, I can swear he reacts, but the doctors say I'm overreacting to something that isn't there, but I refuse to believe them.

I should never have let Mrs. Louder talk me into playing on stage for the whole school yesterday. I was stupid to believe they'd hear my voice and suddenly accept me.

I stood and gathered my things and walked to the door but paused and looked behind me. I scan the room and see the instruments and reminded myself that these are the only friends I need, they may someday sustain me.

I flipped off the light and shut the door.