CW: Part Twenty-Five

The Pines and their friends spent a happy day together after Lee possessed Fidds. Forget packing, forget all of it. Lee could finally be with his family without the thought of Bill looming over him. He had the freedom to truly enjoy himself.

And with that freedom, the first thing Lee wanted to do was have a snowball fight.

"Careful with my body," Fidds said. "I'm more fragile than you were."

Lee could feel that fragility, yes. But he wanted so badly to go outside and just. . . play. It didn't matter that he was in Fidds' sixty-two-year-old body. The exhilaration of being in a body at all made him feel like a kid again.

Andrew left to go back to the minotaur village. Everyone else scrambled to get in snow clothes, and soon they were ready to go outside. The wide-open space of Ford's backyard was perfect to play in. When Lee opened the door and saw all that snow — all that space — his eyes welled up. He could feel the cold. He could take big steps to walk through the deep snow. He was physical.

Ford looked at his brother and smiled. "How's the weather?" he asked.

Lee made a show of squinting up at the sky. "Cloudy," he said.

But even with the sun behind the clouds, Lee was perfectly happy.

That happiness turned to determination as the snowball fight started. Lee and Ford led different teams, and there was little mercy from either side. On Lee's team, Grace turned out to have one of the best aims, and Dipper was a fast snowball maker, which kept them supplied with ammunition. Ford's team had Camille, who also had a great arm, and Pacifica, who darted between her opponents, making her hard to hit.

Lee's team had a bit of a disadvantage, because they only had five people, plus Waddles, against the other team's six. But Lee didn't mind. And Waddles enjoyed nibbling on the extra snowballs that Dipper made just for him.

There was another disadvantage, too, but this one was just amusing: Because Lee was the one they were celebrating, he was also the one that everyone on the other team targeted. Mabel ran up and sent a snowball into his chest. Gideon made a throw that went further than Lee was expecting, and it hit him in the shoulder. And Ford, with a wicked grin, nailed him right in the face.

Oh well. It was worth it.

It didn't take too long for Fidds' body to start aching, unfortunately. And then Grace needed to pause and catch her breath — it wouldn't do to get too worked up, with the baby. But the snowball fight had still lasted a good amount of time. Lee sat in the snow and leaned against the ridge Sam had built to protect their team's base. Lee couldn't stop smiling. And he noticed Fidds' spirit, watching their game, smiling as well.

Dipper suggested building a snowman next. "Wait, no," he said, his eyes alight, "a snow minotaur."

Lee was worried about that being more complicated than he had the skills for, but Dipper's idea turned out to be a normal snowman with snow horns on its head. Lee liked it. And though there were no minotaurs here to see it, he thought they'd like it, too.

After building their snow minotaur (and naming it Xítway, at Lee's suggestion), the group went back inside. Lee made another suggestion: Could Melody make her hot chocolate again?

"Again?" said Melody. "Were you. . . here yesterday?"

Oh. He hadn't meant to tell them that. But, "Yeah," Lee said. "I watched the whole thing."

There was silence for a moment. Then, "Well, of course I'll make more hot chocolate," said Melody.

"I hope I didn't say anything embarrassing yesterday," Sam said, with a sheepish smile.

"You did great," Lee assured him.

Sam's smile grew.

And there it was again. A flash of another time, appearing in Lee's mind's eye. A memory of a younger Sam, with that same smile.

"Lee? Are you all right?" Sam asked.

Lee must've had a strange look on his face. He wiped it off. "I'm fine," he said.

With a fresh batch of Melody's hot chocolate, the group looked through Ford's game cupboard, which didn't have much — but did have enough decks of cards to play a few games with everyone. Lee enjoyed them all.

And they took his mind off his newly emerging memory. He felt strangely hesitant to share that with anyone.

Hours later, the group sat around the living room, just enjoying each other's company. "When is everybody planning on leaving?" Lee asked.

"Nothing is set in stone for us," Sam said.

"We should leave soon, though," Camille added.

"But now Grunkle Lee is here!" said Dipper. "Let's stay longer!"

"Sorry, sweetie," Camille said, "but we need to get back home."

"Plus, I bet the government is going to start investigating things soon," Gideon said. "I want to leave before we get caught up in that."

The others nodded, grimacing.

"Well, whenever they come here, I definitely shouldn't be around," said Lee. "Since I'm dead and all."

Ford flinched a little at Lee's wording. "We'll worry about that later," he said.

"Pacifica and I can probably be ready to leave tomorrow," said Ellie. "But I think we'll stay until Thursday morning."

"We probably shouldn't leave later than Friday morning," Sam added.

Lee blinked. "How far away is that?"

"Today's Tuesday, February fifth," Melody supplied.

"Oh. Then that works." Being dead was disorienting. Lee had had no idea what day of the week or month it was.

"Wait," said Mabel. "It's February fifth."

"A whole month after January fifth," Dipper added. "That's weird."

Melody smiled at Lee. "Also a whole month after the last time you cooked for us," she said. "Do you want to help me make dinner tonight? Or not. I'm flexible."

"Sounds great," Lee said. "Let's do it together."

Lee wasn't used to sharing a kitchen, but Melody was a fun cooking partner. She had Lee grill salmon in a skillet while she made fried rice. Somehow she had enough food for eleven people — and they all seemed to enjoy it. The simple act of eating — of tasting food he had helped make — threatened to bring tears to Lee's eyes again. He hadn't realized how much he'd missed it.

During the dinner, when he wasn't enjoying his borrowed body, he was getting more strange flashes of memory: Sam as a child. Ford as a young man. Lee, young as well, making food for his brother and Fidds. The flashes came along with a headache, courtesy of said borrowed body, and Lee didn't like that.

But he kept eating, kept talking with his family, kept trying to hide his discomfort.

The evening was pleasant other than the flashes and the headache, though. The group finished dinner, talked a while longer, planned what they should do tomorrow, and eventually parted ways. Lee found himself getting pretty tired, even though it wasn't late.

He waved goodbye to the twins and their parents, who were the last to leave. Then he went and sat on the couch, letting out a long breath. Ford joined him.

"Is something wrong?" Ford asked. "You've seemed a bit strange since dinner."

Lee didn't answer for a moment. Then, "Not. . . wrong," he said. "Definitely not wrong."

"Then what is it?"

Why didn't Lee want to tell Ford about this? About the possibility of Lee getting his memory back? Shouldn't that be exciting?

Maybe he was afraid. Afraid that his memory wouldn't be everything he thought it would be, or afraid that it wouldn't come back entirely, or afraid that it would show him a past he wasn't proud of.

But then. . . he'd literally sold his soul to a demon, and died for it. There couldn't be anything much worse than that in his forgotten past.

"Lee?" Ford prompted, looking concerned.

Lee took a deep breath. "I'm remembering," he said.

Ford's eyes widened.

"I'm remembering things. Just in little bits right now. But it started yesterday, and. . . I think it's going to keep coming."

"Lee," said Ford. "Lee, this is amazing!"

The stark joy on Ford's face pushed away some of the clouds of doubt in Lee's mind. "Yeah," Lee said. "Yeah, it is amazing. It's just. . . going to be a lot."

"True," Ford said. He didn't look like he was going to stop smiling anytime soon. "If you ever want to talk it out with me, though, I'd be willing. Maybe that'll help."

"I bet it will." Lee leaned back against the couch. Then he turned his head and gave Ford a smile of his own. "Thanks."

"Of course."

There wasn't much else to say.

The brothers sat there on the couch, quiet except for their calm breaths, enjoying the stillness of being together.

~~~~~

Today was the day. The day Pacifica would be leaving Gravity Rises.

Yesterday, Wednesday, had been a wonderful time with Lincoln and the others. Pacifica's worry about what would happen in Portland had hung over her, but she'd still been able to focus and have a good time. But now it was Thursday, and she had to leave. She had to drive for five hours with her grandmother back to a big city where no one cared about her.

No, she told herself. No, that's not true. Grandmother cares about you. Lincoln cares about you — he told you yesterday that he would come visit. And Mother cares about you.

Speaking of Mother — before she left, Pacifica wanted to figure out what was going on with Catherine. She really had been remembering Pacifica, in bits and pieces. But the memory gun should have erased the memories entirely. Remembering Pacifica should've been impossible.

Pacifica was thankful that it wasn't. But she wanted to know why.

She went to Gideon, asked for his help. She didn't have her amulet anymore (oh, how she missed it), but Gideon had his, and he could do what Pacifica couldn't: read Catherine's mind. Find out why her memories were still there.

Gideon was strangely hesitant. But he agreed.

Pacifica walked to her parents' house with Gideon and Grace. Not only was Pacifica nervous, but it seemed the other two were as well. No one spoke as they all approached the door.

Then they paused.

"What if she remembers me?" asked Gideon. "What if she gets scared?"

Pacifica wasn't sure what he meant. But she wanted Gideon to help her, so she just said, "It'll be fine."

"I think she's right," said Grace. Gideon glanced her way, and they shared a quick, silent conversation with their eyes.

That was kind of annoying. Gideon's sister was cool, but Pacifica didn't want to be left out of the loop.

After a moment, Gideon took a deep breath. "Okay." He knocked on the door.

It opened. "Gideon? What are you doing here?" asked Bud.

Pacifica's heart skipped. Strange that her dad remembered Gideon, but not her.

"Dad," she said, "I want him to look into Mom's mind. And see why she's remembering me."

Bud's gaze skipped over Pacifica; he looked skeptically at Gideon. "I'm not letting you near my wife," he said.

"I just want to look," Gideon said calmly.

"Please?" said Pacifica.

Bud didn't answer for a moment. Then he sighed. "Fine."

They came in and found Catherine, who didn't seem distressed by seeing Gideon. Pacifica started up a conversation — asking how Catherine's day was going, explaining that Pacifica was about to leave town, and so on — while Gideon stood off to the side with his amulet glowing blue.

Pacifica watched Gideon in her periphery as he silently read Catherine's mind. Pacifica couldn't see this magic, the way she was able to see the exorcisms Gideon performed. Strange. She tried not to think too hard about it, though, as she talked with her mother. This was, after all, the last time she'd be seeing her for a while. At least until Catherine visited Portland.

Then the amulet's blue glow disappeared. Gideon must have gotten the information he was looking for. He waited, not saying anything, as Pacifica said goodbye to Catherine and gave her a hug. "I'll see you soon, Mom," she said.

Catherine smiled. "See you soon."

They left the house. That had been far too quick, in Pacifica's mind, given that she was about to leave this house for who knew how long. But she steeled herself, and left.

"So what did you see?" Pacifica asked Gideon as their small group headed back to the library, where Ellie was with the car.

Gideon looked uncomfortable. "I don't really understand what I saw," he said. "But something about. . . the way her mind is. . . made it so the memory gun didn't work."

"Huh," said Pacifica. "What is her mind like, anyway? What did you see? I remember my dad taking Mom to a lot of doctors when I was younger, but they never figured out what was wrong with her."

Gideon didn't respond. His shoulders hunched.

"Gideon," said Grace softly, "you should tell her."

Gideon flinched.

Okay. These two definitely knew something that Pacifica didn't. What was going on?

"I don't really know how to describe it," Gideon said slowly, "what her mind is like. But I know. . . why. I know why she's like this."

"What do you mean?" Pacifica asked.

"It was me," Gideon blurted. He talked fast, like he needed to get it all out. "The first time I used the amulet. It was on her. And something went wrong. It messed with her mind."

Pacifica blinked.

"Are you. . . angry?" Gideon said quietly.

Pacifica was quiet for a moment. And in that moment, Shadow Pacifica faded into view. "You could've had a better childhood if your mom had been normal," the shade said. "Gideon ruined that for you."

Pacifica shook her head, trying not to listen to Shadow Pacifica. "It wasn't your fault," she said to Gideon. "I'm not angry."

He gave a little smile. "Okay. I'm sorry for not telling you about it until now."

She accepted his apology with a smile of her own. "I mean, because of what happened, she's able to remember me now. Right?"

"Yeah," he said. "The pathways of her mind are. . . mixed up. . . so the gun couldn't erase the memories all the way. If that makes sense."

Pacifica nodded. It wasn't something she would've guessed was possible — but the human brain, not to mention magic, could be unexpected. "So she can remember me. I'm happy about that part."

Gideon seemed relieved. Still a little guilty — Pacifica realized he'd probably been holding onto this secret shame ever since she'd become friends with him — but a little better, now that Pacifica had reacted well to his confession.

Shadow Pacifica made a few dark comments about how Gideon was a horrible person, and Pacifica was also a horrible person for not getting angry on her mother's behalf — but Pacifica didn't let it get to her. It's okay, she thought. Really. It's okay.

The small group reached the library. Ellie greeted them. She'd hooked up Pacifica's trailer to the back of the car — they'd found it parked behind the Tent of Telepathy, where Pacifica had done her psychic shows. "We're ready to go," Ellie said. "All that's left is to say goodbye."

Pacifica's stomach flipped. Wait. She couldn't go. Things had just gotten better here. She couldn't just leave and go somewhere else. Somewhere with hospitals and doctors.

"We'll come up to the Mystery Museum with you," Gideon said. There was a soft smile on his face — like he understood what his friend was feeling.

"Okay," Pacifica said, her voice small. She glanced at Ellie. "Can we walk?"

"You're welcome to," Ellie said. "I'm going to drive the car over."

So it was that Ellie drove off while Pacifica walked up the street with Gideon and Grace. Looking around at the town, Pacifica wondered why she had never noticed how pretty it was here. Maybe it was just because she was leaving. But even the dirty snow on the street looked weirdly beautiful right now.

All of the Pines were probably at the Mystery Museum, but only Lincoln was standing on the porch, waiting for her, when she got there. At least, she assumed it was Lincoln. She couldn't see his uncovered eye from here, but she doubted he and Fidds would've switched back yet.

Ellie, who stood by her car parked in the driveway, nodded toward the Museum. Pacifica took that to mean that she'd wait here while Pacifica said goodbye to everyone.

She went up to the porch, and Lincoln — it was definitely Lincoln — gave her a welcome hug. The Pines really liked their hugs. Pacifica couldn't fault them for it. She returned Lincoln's embrace.

"Do you want to come in?" Lincoln asked.

Pacifica considered that. "Yeah," she said. She wanted to say goodbye to everyone else, too. Even though it would be awkward.

She, Lincoln, Gideon, and Grace went inside. The other five Pines, Melody, and Fidds' ghost were all in the living room. Like they'd been waiting for her.

"Hi," Pacifica said nervously.

Melody gave her a warm smile. "You're about to head out?"

"Y-yeah," Pacifica said. She looked around at everyone. They all just looked back at her.

Was that it? Was she just going to leave?

"Are you all right?" Lincoln asked.

Pacifica didn't say anything at first. She could just leave. But that wouldn't be fair. Not after everything she'd done.

Words welled up in her throat, pushed against her teeth, burst out of her. "I'm — I'm sorry," she said. There was suddenly so much she had to say. "I — I've done — terrible things, and — I'm — sorry."

Everyone's expression was different, but all were surprised.

"Melody, I'm sorry I was mean to you," Pacifica said. She started with the most tame of her offenses. "And Ford — I'm sorry for torturing you."

Lincoln put a hand on Pacifica's back. Like he was supporting her.

"Lincoln, I'm sorry for not telling you about your family," she said, looking over her shoulder at Lincoln. Then she turned back around. "D-Dipper, I'm sorry for kidnapping you. And Mabel, I'm sorry for — for trying to—"

Her voice, so eager, suddenly faltered. She couldn't say this last part. It was too shameful. She hung her head.

Then she heard soft footsteps. "Pacifica?" said Mabel.

Pacifica peered up at her through her hair.

Mabel had a faint smile on her face. An actual smile. "We're both going to be okay," she said.

"You think so?" Pacifica whispered.

"Yeah," Mabel said. "I think so."

Then she went over to her mom, apparently too overwhelmed to say anything more. Pacifica understood that.

Mabel hadn't said she had forgiven Pacifica. But that was okay. She didn't have to trust Pacifica or anything like that. She'd be hurting for a while. So would Pacifica, for different reasons.

And yet Mabel had hope that it would be okay. For both of them.

After a moment of silence, Melody came forward to give Pacifica a hug. "Things are going to be great in Portland," Melody said. "I think they will be."

"Thanks," Pacifica whispered.

None of the remaining Pines gave Pacifica a hug, but that was okay. Ford nodded at her, seeming to have accepted her apology. Mabel had her head buried in her mom's shirt. Camille was hugging Mabel, and Sam had an arm around Dipper's shoulders. And Dipper. . . well, he didn't look like he wanted a hug, but he wasn't glaring at Pacifica. She took that as a good sign.

"Pacifica," said Fidds, floating forward, "that was very brave of you."

"Not really," she said, embarrassed.

"I think it was," he said. "It's too bad I can't give you a hug goodbye. But. . . well, I heard you talking to Lee about him visiting you in Portland. Do you think I could come, too, sometimes?"

She smiled. "That'd be great. But you two will have to work out how you're going to seem like the same person, if you're both going to come at different times in the same body. You'll have to fool the psychiatrists."

Fidds chuckled. "Yeah, you're right."

Her smile softened. "Thanks, Fidds. For everything."

"Of course," Fidds said. "I'm glad I could help."

They smiled at each other in silence for a moment. Pacifica was vaguely aware of the others in the room giving her strange looks, or else trying to ignore her, as she had this seemingly one-sided conversation. But it was worth it. And Lincoln, who was still behind her, could see Fidds' ghost, so he knew what was happening.

"Goodbye, Pacifica," Fidds said.

"Pacifica?" said another voice. Gideon.

Pacifica turned. "I hope you have an amazing time with your sister," she told Gideon.

"Thanks," he said. "I hope things are good for you with your grandmother, too."

She stepped forward and hugged him. And he hugged her back. They were both going to unfamiliar places with many unfamiliar people — and their arms around each other gave each other strength. Everything will be okay, they silently said.

"Goodbye," Pacifica said aloud to her friend.

"Goodbye," he replied. He pulled back and smiled at her.

That was everyone she needed to say goodbye to. She turned and looked up at Lincoln. He nodded, and went back outside with her. Gideon, Grace, Melody, and Fidds followed. Ellie was out there, waiting.

Pacifica paused. She looked between Lincoln and Ellie. Ellie, her grandmother, and Lincoln, her guardian. Lincoln, who had once promised to take care of Pacifica. Ellie, who was now keeping that promise.

Lincoln gave her one last hug. Pacifica stood there in his arms for who knew how long.

"I'll see you soon," he promised her.

He hadn't kept his promise that he would take care of her at the Museum. But he had sacrificed himself so that she and everyone else could survive. That counted. And he would visit her in Portland.

So Pacifica believed him. She believed his promise that he would see her soon.

They said goodbye to each other. Pacifica left the porch and walked to her grandmother. Ellie opened the car door for Pacifica, and put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Pacifica took a deep breath. Then got in the car.

She waved out the window — and her friends on the porch waved back — as Ellie backed out of the Museum driveway onto the street. The street was down to one lane at the moment, with construction workers repairing the road. Ellie and Pacifica had to wait for a traffic cop to wave them through before they could get out of town.

And then. . . that was it.

Pacifica had left Gravity Rises.

She was about to start a new chapter in her life. And she was scared. The thought of going to a hospital was scary, even though she knew she needed help. And. . . she would miss magic. She'd miss Lincoln, and everyone else.

But she wouldn't be leaving everything behind. People would still visit her.

It was like Mabel had said. Pacifica was going to be okay. She just had to keep remembering that.

~~~~~

Ford and Lee travelled to the minotaur village. It was Friday morning — just after the Pines, Grace, and Gideon had left. The goodbyes had been tearful.

And now Lee was going to be leaving Fidds' body. Giving it back.

Ford had loved these last few days with his brother. He didn't want to lose him again. He didn't really want Fidds to come back, either.

But Lee was adamant. "This isn't my body," he said. "Fidds is gracious enough to let me use it sometimes. But I can't be here all the time."

Ford knew that. But he didn't have to like it.

At the minotaur village, Andrew, Enoch, June, and another hamadryad prepared the exorcism spell. Apparently the supernatural creatures rarely mixed their magic, but since the experience with the Cipher Wheel, they were more willing to do so, even though that experience had ended badly. It was the sort of thing that would be fascinating to Ford — and he'd want to take notes and ask questions — if he wasn't just about to say goodbye to Lee.

"Are they gone?" Enoch asked when he saw the brothers.

"Yeah," Lee said.

"I'll miss them," Enoch said.

Enoch and his family, plus June, Rowan, Marigold, and some of the other friends the Pines had made this winter, had said goodbye to the Pines when they'd come to visit this morning before leaving. Ford was proud of Dipper and Mabel for making so many connections here in Gravity Rises. There was something to be said about befriending people, not just studying them for scientific research. Ford wanted to start doing both, instead of just the one.

"Ford?" said Lee.

"Yeah?"

"Be nice to Fidds. Okay?"

That annoyed Ford. "I have been."

"I know. I'm just reminding you. I'll visit his dreams when I want to switch with him again, but otherwise, don't bother him about it, okay?"

"Okay, okay."

Lee put his hands on Ford's arms and looked him in the eye. "I love you," he said.

Ford smiled. "I love you, too."

Lee stepped in the middle of the minotaurs and hamadryads, who formed a circle around him. They began their exorcism spell. This particular spell lifted Fidds' body into the air; the back arched. It took longer, too. Ford's stomach churned. Watching this was harder than watching Gideon's exorcisms had been.

But then it was over. Fidds lowered back to the ground and found his footing. His uncovered eye opened — brown. He looked at Ford.

Ford managed a smile.

Fidds stepped away from the spellcasters. "Hi, Ford," he said tentatively.

Ford took a deep breath. Then stepped forward.

And hugged Fidds.

"Thank you," he said.

He was still mad at Fidds, a little bit. But a lot less now.

And if Lee wanted Ford to be nice to Fidds? Well, okay. He would be. That didn't seem so hard anymore.

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