Freddie and I sat side by side, our bodies slumped lazily against the wall. My fingers were still curled around the top of the alcoholic beverage beside me. I'd lost count of how many drinks we'd had now. Everything was slowly becoming a blissful blur, and I loved it.

"What's your secret, Freddie?" I questioned, frowning at him in the dim lighting. He turned his head to face me, and I noticed how much different this Freddie seemed to be compared to the one I'd met only the other day. "What aren't you telling me?"

He took a sip of his drink, seeming to be avoiding my question until he paused, the glass bottle hovering a little away from his lips. "You know, I shouldn't even be here right now. I shouldn't have made it to Earth."

I was confused as his words slurred out, and I watched carefully as his eyes held their gaze on a particular spot in the room, staring despondently.

"Noah and I," he started again, his hands holding the bottle tighter in his grip. "We hacked into the system on the ark. They came for us, but Noah, he told me to go. He told me to leave him and that he'd handle it. And I- I was so scared because I was over eighteen and I knew the repercussions. But he wasn't, and he took the fall for it."

"He sounds like a good guy," I commented, my eyes still trained on him, so I noticed his head fall slightly at my words.

"He is," he said. "Or was." My heart fell slightly as silence lapsed between us. I completely understood the pain of having to deal with all the not knowing whether someone you loved was still here or not. "Is it wrong that I loved him?"

"He's your best friend, of course it's not," I replied as Freddie exhaled through his nose and shook his head, taking quite a large gulp of his drink.

"No, not like that," he eventually responded, his eyes finding their way back to that same spot in the room. "I loved him. Like, I really loved him. And sometimes I thought he felt the same. But other times–" he cut off as I hung on to his words, waiting for him to finish. "I don't even know what we were, it was complicated. But, god, I wish he was still here."

I nodded, trying to understand as much as I could. I didn't really know much about their relationship, but it seemed to have a lot of complexities. "You'll get him back."

"I hope so," he said, an element of deep sadness to his voice. "Even after everything that's happened between us, I still care about him. I need him."

"Were you in a relationship?"

"Like I said, it was complicated." He took a large swig of his drink, and I noticed he'd almost finished yet another bottle, and it was beginning to take it's toll. "One day we were be sat together, like always, as friends. But then all of a sudden it all changed and we had this–" he cut off, a weak, close lipped smile forming on his face. "It was different. It felt like– love, maybe?But we never really disclosed anything, we never decided to be in a relationship or anything." He shrugged, finishing the remains of his drink and setting the empty bottle down to the floor, beside all the others. "I guess I just never got to ask."

"That sucks man," I mumbled, picking my drink back up and taking a large sip. "That really sucks."

"Tell me about it," he sighed heavily, messing with his already dishevelled hair. "What about you? I heard you've had a rough time."

I raised my eyebrows, nodding with a quiet laugh at the truthfulness of it. "Just a bit."

"Tell me about it," he prompted with a small smile as I took a few more large sips from my bottle, bracing myself.

"My dad worked as an engineer and he discovered a flaw on the Ark, about the amount of life support left," I started, the memories of my father suddenly buzzing in my mind. His bright blue eyes, his intelligence, and his inclination to always do the right thing. "Clarke's dad did too," I continued, snapping out of my thoughts. "They both thought that people had a right to know, as did we. Obviously, the council disagreed and, well, Abby turned them in. Both our fathers were floated and Clarke and I got locked up to keep the secret. That's how I ended up down here."

"Abby turned them in?" He questioned as I nodded along, bringing the bottle to my lips again. "That's– that's, wow."

"Tell me about it."

"You and Clarke are close, right? I mean, something like that has to bond you together." When I didn't reply for a few moments, he spoke up again. "Sorry, that was kinda insensitive."

"We grew up together," I answered with a shrug. "We're still growing up together. Things are just– well, they're different down here."

"What about Bellamy?"

I swallowed thickly, glancing away from Freddie and directing my attention elsewhere. "What about him?"

"You guys seem close," he said, and when I turned back to face him, I noticed an almost smug smile on his face. "Just an observation."

I finished the remainder of my drink, setting the bottle down hard against the floor. Freddie continued to watch me, waiting for my response, so I shrugged. "It's complicated."

"Fair enough," he commented, reaching over to collect the empty bottles. "More drinks?"

~

When I woke up on the hard floor, with empty bottles strewn around the room and Freddie over by the wall, snoring loudly, I immediately regretted all my decisions to drink so much last night.

I couldn't help but let out a groan, my hand immediately flying to my pounding head. This was so much worse than the hangover I had after Unity Day. So. Much. Worse.

I decided to let Freddie sleep and instead picked up his discarded brown cardigan, pulling it over my clothes as I stepped outside into the chilly morning air. The sun was low in the sky, causing me to squint, and the burning pain in my head to intensify. I debated quickly slipping back inside, but someone had already spotted me.

"Where the hell have you been?" Bellamy's low voice sounded as I placed the side of my hand on my forehead, trying to block out the sun. He came to a stop in front of me, placing his large hands on my shoulders, his eyes scanning over me. "I was worried you'd–"

I frowned, wondering why he'd cut off so suddenly until I saw him staring intensely at someone behind me. I turned my head, seeing Freddie stumbling into the outdoors, looking a little worse for wear. Okay, that was the understatement of the century.

Bellamy caught the material of the cardigan I was wearing between his fingers, obviously not recognising it as mine considering it was very oversized. I could practically see his mind jumping to conclusions, and feared the worst when he slowly removed his hands from my shoulders. "I guess you're okay then."

"Bell–" I started with a groan, only to receive a shake of his head as my response. God, he was so stubborn. "Bellamy–" I started to jog to catch up with him, and obviously hearing my heavy footsteps, he came to a halt. I was about to explain, when a crowd of people suddenly surged forwards, catching  my attention.

"Clarke," he said, causing me to frown as he glanced over at me.

"Is she okay?" I questioned, worry immediately settling in me. "What happened?"

"She met with the leader of the Grounders," he stated, those words alone being enough to scare the shit out of me. "She was trying to make a truce."

"Oh my god," I breathed out, beginning to jog in the direction of the crowd, Bellamy by my side as we made our way towards the gates. On the way, he passed me a gun, which I took carefully into my hands. It had been a while since I last had one, and I was beginning to like the feeling of power and protection holding one gave me.

The guards were already stationed with their weapons positioned, as two Grounders on horses made their way towards us. Once I spotted Clarke was unharmed, I slowly lowered my gun, Bellamy following suit.

"Hold your fire! She's back!"

"Open the gate!" A guard called out.

"Power up the gates," Byrne added. "Roll-out positions. Stay ready!"

Once the gate was open, Clarke's eyes locked with mine, but before Bellamy and I could get to her, Finn found her first.

"Shut the gate!" I heard her instruct one of the guards, and I looked up at Bellamy with concern. I thought there was supposed to be a truce?

Clarke had grabbed Finn's arm and started pulling him away, whilst Bellamy, Abby and I quickly followed. Abby embraced her daughter into a hug and I gave my friend a small smile, waiting with apprehension to hear what she had to say.

"Is there a chance for a truce?" Abby questioned as people began to surround the five of us, silence hanging in the air.

"Yes," Clarke finally said. But I knew, I just knew something wasn't right.

"What's wrong?" Finn inquired, as Clarke eventually met his gaze.

"They want you," she told him. "If we want a truce, we have to give them Finn."

I stared at her for a moment, my heart feeling like it had come to a stop as I just hoped and prayed that her words weren't true. But of course they were. Finn shot so many of their people, it was inevitable they wanted justice.

Whispers broke out around us, but it was Raven's voice that came through the loudest. "What the hell are you talking about?" She demanded as she pushed her way to the front of the crowd. I truly felt awful for her, knowing that the chances of people wanting to save Finn were incredibly thin. Fear was already hanging in the air.

"That's their offer," Clarke said, unable to even look at Finn, as if it hurt too much.

"That's not an offer," Raven shot back, shaking her head in refusal.

"It's punishment," Finn spoke up. "For what happened at the village. Blood for blood."

"That's insane," Bellamy stated and I mostly agreed. There was no way, no way at all, that we could just hand Finn over like that. They would torture him, just like they did with Murphy. I couldn't stand by and watch that happen.

"If we refuse?" Abby asked, her voice a little quieter.

Clarke replied with the exact words nobody wanted to hear. "They attack."

"Say we give him up!"

"Get rid of him!"

"Give him to the Grounders!"

I shook my head in disappointment, again finding myself wondering how people could be so callous. What Finn did wasn't right, but he didn't deserve to suffer like this.

On the other hand, if the Grounders did attack, then I couldn't help but wonder what would happen to my mom. I couldn't let any harm come to her either. It seemed like whichever way, I was going to lose someone.

"Easy, people," Byrne ordered beginning to step between the people and Finn.

"Give him to the Grounders!" One man shouted, stepping out of the crowd.

"Back off!" Raven immediately dived towards the man, her sudden outburst or anger startling me.

"Raven!" I started, reaching out for her, considering I was the closest. The man took another step closer, but Bellamy was quick to get in between them, pushing the guy away as I managed to tug Raven back.

"Raven, listen to me," Clarke started as she struggled her way out of my grip. "Nothing is gonna happen to him. I promise, ok?"

I saw her begin to settle down, relief flooding her eyes. But I knew she was still on edge. She was like a ticking time bomb.

"I'm not dying for him!" Another man exclaimed, stepping towards us. "Spacewalker burned 3 months of oxygen from the Ark. He should've floated a long time ago."

Before I even realised what was going on, Raven was already rushing towards the man until Byrne stepped in to attempt to stop the fight. She began to pull Raven away, but in an effort to stop her I watched as my friend's knuckles connected with Officer Byrne's face.

I stood speechless, watching as two officers began to restrain her. They began to drag her off, Raven shouting and squirming in their grip. "Let me go!"

I felt my gaze harden as we watched on, knowing there was nothing I could do other than to help keep Finn safe.

↠

A/N

I live for jealous Bellamy tbh.