"Um, can you repeat that?" I say.

Codi Brown uses his hands again, spreading them wide like a bald eagle in flight. "I just can't wrap my head around it. How did the giraffe fit into the ark? And was there really enough foliage for them to feed on?"

I glance at the other three members of my Bible study. Cynthia Lee draws her brows together, her hand cupping her jaw. Sammy Black looks like she wants to leave right at this moment. On the other hand, Nolan Dallas smirks and answers eagerly. "The giraffe back then is not the giraffe that we know today."

Codi takes in the words and nods slowly, a little disappointed. I try for an easy smile, reigning everything in. We only have five more minutes after all. "It's hard to imagine such a miracle," I say. "I mean, if I was in the ark I would definitely be throwing up everywhere. And the bathroom situation? Don't even get me started."

Cynthia's brow goes even more wayward. Sammy sighs and takes a sip out of her iced Americano. The coffee shop that we frequent, which resembles a classic take on a Seattle roaster, buzzes when a nearby chess player screams out loud. Bested by his rival. Again.

I try for another smile. "Anyway, should we all go around and share prayer requests?"

Sammy shares first. "Well, my boyfriend is leaving for another country. Japan, to be exact. He wants me to go with him. But I can't. So I guess, pray for that."

"We definitely will," I say. I'm reminded again of our recent graduation from high school. So many people leaving, so fast. I can't even keep up with all the updates, which eventually led to a mini social media fast. "What about you, Cynthia?"

Cynthia takes a while to respond, her eyes scanning the room as if looking for an answer within the deep brown walls. "Well, I'm thinking about whether I should volunteer to do translation for my Saturday night service. I think it might be fun?"

"That would be such a great way to serve," I say. I risk a glance at Nolan, who has a massive crush on Cynthia, bigger than any pre-flood giraffe. He swallows, keeping his eyes strategically on the table. "Um. Nolan? Or Codi?"

Codi launches into his struggle about trying to lose weight. "It doesn't matter how much I try. I just keep wanting that extra double chocolate chip cookie. Gosh. Just pray that I can resist the temptation of sweets."

I nod, the words escaping me. Nolan saves me at the last second—"And for me. I guess... it does get lonely sometimes. Without a... lover."

I almost choke on my own spit. Sammy pushes my drink over to me. I take the last sip, gulping up a majority of air, making the annoying sputtering noise. I can't stand myself sometimes. "We'll definitely pray for that too!" I say. Choking incident—avoided.

"What about you, Martin?" Sammy asks me.

"Probably...." I thought about this earlier. Why can't I bring it to mind? "I... Well! I have my first Bible summer school class. I'm really hoping it goes well. I just hope I'm not the dumbest one there."

Cynthia gives me a concerned look. "You were almost valedictorian."

"Yeah but that's different!" I probably look like Nolan when he tries to flirt with Cynthia. "Well, it will be pretty fun. And it's not like it's a hardcore class."

"You will do so well, Martin," Sammy says, patting my arm.

I talk just for one more minute. Then Codi brings up the giraffe yet again, and I have to escape by checking my watch. I get a notification on my phone that Liss has arrived in the parking lot. "See you guys next time! Same place, same time. In one week."

Atlanta's brutal summer heat hits me as soon as I step outside. I've lived here my whole life, and I'm still not used to the ninety plus degree weather. Blinded, I walk aimlessly for two seconds before Liss' car honks at me. I look up, or at least try to. Her blue Kia stares at me. Inside, Liss watches me with a concerned look.

I singe my hand while opening the passenger door. "Thanks!" I tell her.

"No prob," she says. "I'm happy for you to be my passenger princess."

I try to laugh. "Thanks... I mean, I guess that's who I'm bound to be."

Liss swerves out of the parking lot and merges into the street without an issue. "Huh? Martin, you're not still insecure about not driving, are you?"

"What?" I say with too much force. I push myself backwards, trying to relax in the seat. "No way. I'm totally okay with not having my license. Yet."

She hums. "Okay. But remember what I told you—you gotta take your time! No one is rushing you. And if they do, they're complete assholes."

"You owe me a quarter in our no-swearing jar," I say.

She scoffs. "You already have enough to buy coffee for the rest of your life. How was Bible study?"

I recall the hour we spent at the coffee shop. "Um. Nolan still only has eyes for Cynthia. Codi asked a ton of slightly odd questions as usual, and I think Sammy's had enough of us all. Anyway, I hope we last. We've been meeting for over a year now. Don't you think that's as good as a long term relationship? Who needs a partner when we have each other? Oh! You stopped going to your Bible study, right? How about you join ours?"

I have a feeling I've talked too much, but I know Liss never minds. She stares at the red light in front of us. "About that.... Martin, I have something to tell you."

Trying to laugh to dispel the sudden serious atmosphere, I say, "You decided to study engineering instead of design."

Liss casts me a small smile. "Not that. I just. I can't—I mean there are some things I can't get over in regards to my faith. I'm thinking about leaving church. Just for now."

A ton of bricks descends on my chest. "What? Why didn't you tell me this before, Liss? You can't leave church! How long have you been feeling like this?"

Liss speeds up and merges into the leftmost lane. The Bible college is only a few blocks up ahead, but I want to talk to my best friend more, to figure out her struggles. She waves me away with her right hand. "It's something that I need to deal with on my own. But it's about the suffering in this world. I just can't wrap my head around why that's a thing—no matter how hard I try."

"I get that...." As the leader of my Bible study, as the son of not one but two pastors, I feel like I have the duty to say more. "We need to have a full discussion about this. Maybe tomorrow after Sunday service. You haven't left yet right?"

"Not yet," she says. She tries for a smile before flipping on her sunglasses. "Have a good class, Martin."

I reach over to give her a hug. She smells like lilacs as always. With tears springing to my eyes, I carry the weight of my best friend while heading into the Bible college. It's connected to my home church, Church Together, although the college usually is mentioned as an acronym—CTC. The last letter standing for college. I think you might've guessed that, but I have to be sure.

"Oh Liss," I mumble to myself as I walk. Liss has been going to church with me since we were babies. I knew that a lot of young people don't go to church after becoming an adult, but I never thought that Liss would be one of them.

I kick my foot against a divot in the sidewalk. "Ah!" I scream as my toe gets jammed in a crack. Trying to wiggle out, I almost fall straight into the grass of the courtyard. "Nothing to see here!" I say, to no one in particular.

Extricating myself, I take a more careful look at the ground. I regard the small college building—three levels, painted an inconspicuous light brown. I like the many windows and the grass and trees surrounding it. Most of all, I like the possibility of all I could learn in there.

My plans for the summer include getting closer to God and learning all I can about the Bible. I haven't yet decided on a major, but I'm very much leaning towards theological studies. With Liss dropping this bomb on me, I might have to adjust my plans. Talking to her should be my number one priority.

My class is on the first floor. Twenty other people sit in a brightly lit classroom, and the atmosphere is already so different from high school. People seem more relaxed, and most are glued to their phones.

I take a seat in the second row and look around to see if I recognize anyone. I recognize about half of the students here, since most are from church. I wave to about five people. Since I arrived only a few minutes early, the professor starts the class and begins to introduce herself. She's Rina Yim.

She has paint on her shirt, multicolored splashes of blue that remind me of a robin's egg. She writes her name on the board with a flourish that I'm quite jealous of actually. "We'll be learning quite a bit about ourselves this summer.

"This is a two month class, and I will be taking attendance, so be sure to get here on time. In this class, we're going to be exploring the Bible. The course is called Intro to Bible Lit. As in literacy. We'll be doing a full span of the main themes, key figures, and passages. Of course, you'll be expected to own a Bible. Preferably physical, and...."

I don't want to tune her out, but I end up glancing at the rubric and poring over all of Liss' words. I know it shouldn't be about me. It should be about her—her faith. Is there anything I could've done though, to see the signs earlier?"

Eventually, we come to the horrible part of the first day of class, introducing ourselves. Actually, I don't mind it too much once we start.

"And that's how I enrolled in this course," the girl behind me says. "I guess I'm most excited to learn about humor in the Bible. Hah."

Since it's my turn now, I clear my throat. Professor Yim asked us to share about one of our misconceptions about the Bible. "I'm Martin," I say. "Funny story, actually. When I first started reading the Bible, I thought that angels were the most pretty things. I wanted to hug an angel! Turns out, they are actually pretty terrifying. I would never want to be an angel, especially when there's a mirror around."

I never thought that silence can be deafening. Swallowing, I try to remember the rest of the questions. When a total of ten painful seconds passes, Professor Yim claps her hands together. "Let's move on to the next person!"

Embarrassing myself has always been easy. But this is college we're talking about. I shouldn't have to worry.

Glancing over my shoulder, I see Nolan Dallas entering the room with a sheepish smile. He's taking this class too? Why didn't he say so?

He takes a seat in the back—very typical Nolan. I refuse the urge to text him. For all I know, he could've signed up at the very last moment. He's always been one to take things second by second.

Professor Yim opens up with our rubric. She says today will be a short lesson, mainly to go over what we will be learning. I couldn't have asked for something better, when my mind is already preoccupied with so many things.

At the end of class, I head straight to Nolan. "What are you doing here?"

"I thought it'd be fun!" he says, a flash going through his green eyes. "And I almost completely forgot about it. Anyway, I'll see you at church?"

"Yes," I say. "I plan to walk over there now. But I need to make a phone call first...."

"I'll save you a coffee," he says, winking. "A mocha like always? Oat milk?"

"You know it," I say, trying to add some oomph into my voice. Everyone knows I need it.

If he notices my somber mood, he doesn't say anything. At the end of the hall, when everyone has left, I dial Liss' number. She answers on the second ring.

"Martin?"

"Liss," I say. "Look, I'm sorry I couldn't talk more in person earlier. But, could you please try to explain a bit more?"

She sighs. It sounds like she opened the door to her fridge. "Martin, I read the other day that over ten thousand kids die of hunger every day, and most are unbelievers. Do you realize that our pastor said that they will go to hell?"

I gulp. I know this already, and I thought I had a response prepared. But all the words escape me.

Liss goes on. "And people dying from sickness every day. I prayed so hard for my friend's mother when she got lung cancer. Look how that ended up? Maybe I would've made peace with it, but look at all the unanswered prayers for people with different illnesses?"

I know that I have to work through all this with her. "I get that, Liss. Let's talk about it more. How about coffee after service tomorrow?"

"Sure," she says. She actually sounds a bit relieved. I hang up reluctantly.

With heavy feet and an even heavier heart, I head down the sidewalk to Church Together. Wanting to relieve my stress, I tilt my head back and let out a horrible scream. I must sound like a monster in a fantasy movie. My voice gets stuck in my throat a bit, and it's like something strangled me twice. "AGHHHH!"

In a strange act of coincidence, I look over my shoulder. Professor Yim stands and stares at me with wide eyes, clutching her purse like someone would clutch their pearls.

"Um." I swallow, then turn back and run straight to the church building. I don't have time to study it, but it looks like a cute glass structure, with plenty of posters stuck to the front doors. I run past Nolan, past the pretty cafe, straight into the sanctuary.

Breathing hard, I sit down on my favorite seat. Facing forward, I wait for the minutes to count down. For service to start. When worship starts, I feel my most comfortable. My most confident, and closest to God.

After this service ends, I will know what to say to Liss. I pray for the wisdom to say the right thing. Taking a massive breath and holding it for five seconds, I can almost feel an angel rest their hands on my shoulder. 

Hi reader! What do we think about the first chapter of Good Christian Boy? 

I am so happy to be doing weekly updates and getting a bit more serious about consistency in my writing and posting. Thank you for joining me! I know that Martin will definitely interest you with each new week.

What type of books are you enjoying these days? I am enjoying everything speculative.