nine

on the day of jonghyun's passing, i read a post that tore through my heart. it was from a website that had been supporting him since he debuted. they posted, "its cold today. please dress warmly. you've done well." they were referring to bundle up on his way to the heavens and that was just so bittersweet for me. 

in relation to that, yesterday was his funeral and burial.

i'm not going to lie and say i didn't watch videos of the funeral procession. im going to blatantly admit that i was selfish and watched, not because it was a form of entertainment for me, but because i wanted to see the members of shinee together one last time.

in my heart they will always be five, but i wanted to see the members bid their brother a final farewell.

i cried again, a river of tears. and the skies have been gloomy in los angeles since he left.

but in japan apparently, something beautiful happened.

the moon turned aqua blue, which is shinee's fandom color. i just found that lovely. it might have just been a coincidence. but i don't think so. as i have mentioned before, i am very spiritual. 

to me, it was jonghyun's way of letting us all know that he has reached his destination.

he can finally rest in peace.

though i am still personally in mourning, i have decided to not only post poems, quotes, and songs that remind me of him. but i would also like to post happy moments because i want to remember him smiling and on the stage singing, which was something that he truly loved.

thank you all for being with me through my sadness.

-clary